With a very heavy heart, I am readopting out Starling. This has not been an easy choice, but he is a big part of the family. Arin has agreed that his art, design, and name will go with him, as well as his purchases. It will be up to the adopter if they wish to keep the bag that he has and Stella the starling. This is his profile here. His appearance will not be changing but I am open for his personality to shift. For those that haven't followed his drama, he has had a falling out with all of his friends as well as most of his family. He doesn't believe that he is good enough despite what everyone has said. It would be within logic for him to overcome this and come back with a fresh mind, finally listening to all the things that his family has said. I would advice anyone applying to read through his posts. I do not see a super dramatic change in personality working, which is why I will be very picky with picking who plays him. I would love for a newer member to get him! Oh, he also speaks fluent Italian. Arin also said that his stutter is due to his nerves, so it can be kept or fazed out.

I also have the right to take him back if he does not remain active. Also, since Arin did the design and is keeping it with the character, the design and name does NOT belong to the person who adopts, but stays with the character. (So pretty much me) You will not be allowed to use this design anywhere else.

Here is a link to his post log which has all of his art.

Form

Code:

<b>OOC Name :</b>
<b>Keeping Items?</b> Stella the starling, herb pack.

<b>New Personality :</b> At least 150 words
<b>Plans :</b> How is he going to fix things with his family? Staying in Abaven? (I would like him to stay with his family) Still friends with Cathaoir? (He had a crush on him) Him and Quake were close, and he will remain her mentor if he stays in Abaven.

<b>Roleplay Example :</b> At least 100 words

OOC Name : Rivaxorus
Keeping Items? Stella the starling, herb pack. All the items

New Personality :
WIP
Plans : He'd definitely stay in abaven, as for the other things I'm not sure. It'd have to be rped out and Starling would do what he'd do. He was one of my favorite characters on Ardent and even if I don't get him I'll be happy to see him running around so I figured I'd give it a shot to take him and love him.

Roleplay Example :

WIP



I'll work on it later tonight

OOC Name: Keno

Keeping Items: Stella the Starling and Herb Pack.

New Personality :

Starling is a wolf who has grown tired of being tired so to speak. This is not to say the problems that he had with his family and friends are going to magically be fixed. But Starling has decided, once and for all, that he is not giving up any more. He is not going to give up on himself. It has taken a lot of pounding through family and friends to get this sort of message across. Starling has finally come to understand that no one will value and respect him if he doesn’t value and respect himself first.

This is not to say that the boy is no long self-conscious. If anything he is more self-conscious than before. His mind is a constantly working process, reminding himself that he is enough and all he has to do is keep going to show himself {and everyone else} that is the case. He will remain soft-spoken, yet, when it comes to herbs and healing he has a firm and level head. He can remain calm under times of pressure.

Starling is intuitive when it comes to learning about herbs, but he seems to lack the natural street smarts for fighting. He is aware of this weakness and does his best to be careful in everything he does. He will be more mindful, trying to make sure he doesn’t talk about himself too much. He will tend to be overly apologetic. He will have a pessimistic view about himself for a while longer until he can finally prove to himself what others already see.

On another note Starling is a kind-hearted wolf, through and through as well as well mannered. He wants to help others and takes his job as a healer very seriously. He cares truly for each patient and is still terrified of failure, though he has realized if he thinks he fails before he tries he will. He is not generally aggressive but shows a protective nature over his family. When in the company of those he values Starling can become easily embarrassed. The bad nerves he seems to have been born with will stick with him, making him feel tense around others from time to time. This may be something Starling overcomes with time and the right conditions.

Plans :

--Starling is going to realize he has to push himself to overcome his own weaknesses. He will keep moving forward, pushing to listen to the words that his family has told him time and time again. It is likely he took a little time for himself in the beginning of Winter to get to this conclusion. Star is tired of being tired. He knows he has to work towards change and mending not just the wounds of his packmates but his broken relationships as well.

--Staying In Abaven

--Still Friends With / Crushing on Cathaoir

Roleplay Example :

When Winter first hit Abaven lands Starling knew he had to do some thinking. He was tired, yes, so very tired. But more importantly he was tired of being tired. He had made sure that all the previous patients afflicted with the viral pneumonia had been treated or were in a stable enough condition before he locked himself up within his stores. Laying around his herbs Starling had thought really long and hard about what his family had said to him, what they had been saying to him. He thought of his own actions. He thought of how everyone interpreted what he did. He thought of Cathoair and he thought of change.

Starling knew that things had to change from the way they currently were. It couldn’t go on like this. If he kept thinking he would make mistakes then he would. It was jinxing himself. The only way to break out of this endless cycle of self pity and regret was to keep pushing forward. He had to keep going not just for his pack’s sake but his own. He had to overcome the biggest challenge of his life and mend the things he’d broken; his relationships with others in the pack.

“Stella...” Starling called to the little bird. She was never really far from the den though. She came inside, landing upon his bag before she looked up at him. “Are you done moping?” Stella had been reminding Starling of all that his family and friends had said. Reminding him that he was good enough. He had to make himself see it.

“Y-Yeah...” Starling gave a small nod. The little bird gave a nod. “I just need more time... I need to turn this around before I crash and burn too. I don’t want to end up like the others who truly failed Abaven... Those who abandoned it. This is my home... My family... My friends... I can’t abandon them.” His words held a new tone of confidence as Starling rose to all fours.

“I’m going to speak to my father. If you could... Go check on Finch for me?” The young man asked. He still had images and nightmares of her... When she was dying. It was Finch and her near death experience, as well as Sparrow and Bass’ words in particular that had struck home. He had a long path ahead of him... But no matter how hard it was to walk along that path...

...he was going to keep rolling.

OOC Name : Keanai
Keeping Items? Yes.

New Personality :
a theme song of sorts, though minus the religious bits - replace that with his family
Starling is a wolf recovering from disaster - a disaster of his own doing. Torn by his own doubts and insecurities, he was only saved by a few close friends of his, and he is determined to never let that happen again. He's determined to fix his mistakes, and to not let himself fail like that again; it's hard work, but the boy is more than willing to do it in order to repair the bonds he had broken with his family.

From this experience, he learned quite a bit - namely, the ability to accept criticism without it overloading him, the ability to accept advice, and the ability to accept his own misgivings and mistakes while still seeing the good in himself. In the past, he always focused on the bad - no more. Like with what his father said, he has done things to make his fmaily proud. He is not going to blindside himself anymore. SImply put, the experience matured him. He wised up to what he was doing.

The experience aside, the core personality of the boy remains the same: he is a calm man, who cares deeply for all those around them. He dislikes violence, for it leads to injuries, which in turn causes fear, pain, hatred, anger... all emotions he hates. It can also cause self-loathing - how dare you were bad enough in a fight you got hurt? He can see it happening, and he never wants someone to go through the same self-loathing that he did, to the point it almost destroyed everything he cared for.

However, as much as he dislikes violence, he is a healer to the very deepest crevices of his heart. He will gladly help anyone in need, whether or not they are in Abaven. He believes that no one should be denied treatment,just as no one should be denied advice. No matter the situation, both should be offered freely and willingly.

Unfortunately, that big heart of his does cause a downside when he's healing and helping others - he's absolutely terrified of messing up. Nevermind the fact that he actually saved someone from death... what if... what if in the future he's unable to? He knows it will happen, most likely, at some point. He's heard that it happens to healers. You can't save everyone. But with Starling... he wants to save everyone. It rips hi up inside every time he sees someone in pain, especially a sibling. It's why he tries so hard to heal them, so they're no longer in pain. It makes him fiercely passionate about what he does, to the point that in a true emergency, his only thoughts are on what needs to be done.

quick: calm, wise, kind, shy, dislikes violence, prefers peace, sweet, always willing to help, still insecure but better about it, open with those he loves, actively seeks advice when needed and willingly gives advice, secretly scared of failing, terrified of losing a patient, gets too attached to those he heals,
Plans :
He's going to go off on his own for a bit - think on it, perhaps talk to a few people on the outside of the situation and ask for advice. He will realize, through quiet reflection and perhaps Cathaoir, that his family is right. He's done nothing to fail them. He's done nothing to cause any disappointment in regards to healing and whatnot. It was all in his mind, his imagination, and he didn't start disappointing his family until he gave up and stopped trying. This is when he will return to Abaven, and beg forgiveness; he will understand he hurt them, and what went wrong. He will ask for them to help him, help him work on his insecurities. he will start actively healing again, working with Quake and other wolves and determined to help all those around him who were once like him.

He will 1000% stay friends with Cathaoir. I'm thinking Cathaoir will be an essential part to his recovery, and most definitely an important part in his life.
Roleplay Example :
He wanted nothing more than to return home.

Home… he felt tears prickling his eyes, and he sniffled, blinking back the tears. Home on the Serpent Plains, with snakes slithering around as he picked herbs, and where his family made their dens. Home in the Rustling Thicket, where grasses grew taller than him and he could act as a pup; a peaceful place to think. Home at the Monument Rapids, where the cool spray and the sound of rushing water soothed him. Home. He had not thought of Abaven as home in so long, and only now did he realize that home… home was not in the West. It was not in the North. It was not with Cathaoir, nor any other friend he knew. Home was with his family. Home was in the East, in these three lands, where the scents and voices of his family were.

Home was a chance to be happy. Home was a chance to fix himself, fix his mistakes and his wrongdoings. Home was a chance to see his younger siblings, to be their support, their role model. Home was with Lark, who was his rock and his stone. Home was with Finch, who was his loudest cheerleader, the one who understood him best. Home was with Pip, who he always cared for and loved. Home was with Sparrow, who accompanied him down the path of healing. Home was with Bass… who, despite not always understanding Starling, still loved him, and was proud of him. He wanted nothing more than to make his father proud, and he had. Until his doubts and anxiety took it all away and made him run, abandon his family, his friends, and his responsibilities

They all were. It was something he hadn’t realized, and something he was still coming to terms with. His accomplishments… his doings… they were something his family was proud in. Had he not let his own doubts interfere, then none of this would have happened. It was wholly his fault, and he accepted it; oh how he had everyone - Finch, Lark, his dad, Cath - to thank for that. His words, their soothing comfort, their kick-to-the-butt…

How he longed to fix his mistakes, to undo what he had done to his friends… his family… his father. To undo the pain he caused. It had taken him so long to realize what he was doing. That he was breaking apart everyone, that he was hurting everyone with his words, with his insecurities.

He had been blind to it all.

Even when they reassured him… he stayed ignorant. How? It seemed so obvious what he was doing. It felt, now, as if his heart would be ripped out of his chest, as he stared wordlessly up at his father, trying to resist the tears that threatened to spill over.

Gods… it hurt so much. To hear his father, to see his father, and to recieve nothing but the alpha. To see the pain that he caused etched over his own dad’s face. How could he do that? How could he do that to his family? He didn’t know, still, how on earth he could fathom doing what he did…

He felt so alone, so wrapped in darkness, and he didn’t want to feel like that. He had spent too long in there already. He had spent too long damaging those around him. He had spent too long alone… he didn’t want to be alone in the dark anymore. But he was so afraid. What if they didn’t want him back? What if they would prefer him to be gone, away from their lives? What if… what if… what if they hated him? He left Abaven, he left everyone, his father, Finch, Lark, even his friends like Lillianna and Zell. He just abandoned him. He deserved Lillie biting him so long ago. He deserved his father’s disappointment. Maybe he should just leave, go back to Cathaoir. Walk away from his father, who watched him so sternly, pain written across his face.

His head bowed as he stood there silently. No, he couldn’t. He couldn’t leave. He couldn’t walk away… again. He had done that too many times already. He had abandoned his family, abandoned those who loved him and only wished him the best. He could not - would not - do that ever again. As if sensing his torn mind, the soft, wordless trill of a starling reaching his ears. His ears twitched somewhat - he knew that was Stella, ever encouraging him while still giving privacy. It was enough, and the boy slowly raised his head to look at Bass.

“Papà,” he whispered, his voice cracking on that singular word, a choked sob shaking his body. Lark had been right. Finch had been right. Dad had been right. The sobs broke free, and they wrenched his body as he shook, helpless and defenseless in front of his father. “Oh papà!” He cried out, shaking his head back and forth. “Mi manchi. Mi manchi tanto. Ti amo , papà , e mi dispiace tanto!”

He just wanted to be held. He wanted to be comforted, to nestle in between the paws of his father and feel again the rasp of a tongue over his ears. That would not come, he knew. Those were the foolish, childish dreams of a pup, and like it or not, he was a pup no longer. He had been reminded of that often enough, and he knew now that it was wholly the truth.

He steeled himself on the inside, and slowly, the sobs from where he was standing subsided. The tears stained the fur on his face, and as his head rose once more, tears glimmered unshed in his eyes to meet Bass’, if the alpha would allow it. “Non ci sono scuse per il dolore che vi ho causato, ei miei fratelli e sorelle. Ma spero che possiate perdonarmi, papà,” he whispered, soft and broken-sounding, a sad note within. He’d… he’d understand if Bass didn’t forgive him. He ignored all the words of his loved ones and had hurt them, and then he… he left Abaven. He spoke cruel words, believing he was useless and insisting that he could not make his father proud. He had made the choice to leave. Now, he wanted the opportunity to return, knowing full well his father had refused many other older former members re-entrance into the pack.

In the following days he had run, the scent of Abaven growing staler and staler as he travelled further and further away. But the coming of winter and the kind words of strangers and of Cath pushed him to return, and now here he was. “Y-You were r-right. A-all of you… w-were right. I-I w-was wrong and I s-see that n-now. “Si può mai perdonarmi per quello che ho fatto?” His voice dropped on the last sentence, a mere whisper, and he looked down again. His ears flattened to his skull, his tail curling in between his legs; his posture was completely submissive.

Oh please, let his father forgive him. Let him make up for what he has done, make up for his past transgressions. He wanted to be with his family. He didn’t want to fight alone anymore.

OOC Name : Shelby

Keeping Items? Yes to both

New Personality : Starling is a wolf in recovery from himself. He has spent so much time and energy learning how to heal the physical ailments of others that he forgot to learn how to care for his mental ailments. He cares so widely and so deeply that he sometimes doesn’t understand how to handle all of the emotions that swirl inside of him, distracting him from what’s right in front of him. He’s learning how to do just that so he can clearly see the love that is getting reflected back at him. The path to recovery isn’t an easy one, but he has come to learn that anything worth having isn’t easy to attain.

He is so bright and intelligent, able to pick up things quickly and remember things as if his mind is a vault for all things healing. Even though he’s learning to move past this fog that has held him down for so long, he still feels the most alive when he’s in the zone of healing. That is his true passion and finds the most comfort in the challenge and the mental stimulation of it all. It makes him get out of his own head for a moment and puts his focus solely on the one that he is healing.

After the turmoil his own mind has put him through, he has gained a new kind of strength from the experience. It gave him a new kind of appreciation for other’s anguish and the pain that they may be feeling on the inside rather than the outside. He hopes that through his own struggles he can find the knowledge to be able to help others that are going through the same things. He is sure that he can’t be the only one to have these internalized problems. He wants to be the wolf that others can rely on to listen to their problems and help them work through it if they want his help.

His family is his world and the entire reason he worked so hard to find his way out of his depression. He relies heavily on them to keep his head above water, but at the same time he wants to be someone they can rely on as well. They are the reason he is still alive and well and so loved. Now he just has to learn how to let that love in and really feel it deep in his soul now that the walls his own subconscious put up are gone.

Plans :  I definitely want him to stay in Abaven if for no other reason than to be with his family. He’ll probably want to apologize for everything, but even more than that he’ll want to work and prove that he truly means it and show that he’s here to stay. It’ll be a long road of recovery and mending bridges, but he’s ready to put in the time to do that. I’m absolutely willing to keep any plots with Cathaoir open as well. I’m sure Starling will want to mend as many of his relationships as he can, Cathaoir and Quake included.

Roleplay Example : Starling’s ears twitched and he lifted his eyes from the ground between his paws at the sound of fluttering wings. His eyes landed on Stella, standing on the ground in front of him with several leaves of lamb’s ear grasped in her beak. A small smile touched his lips and he spoke softly, ”Ben fatto, Stella. Grazie.” His friend dropped the leaves at his paws before taking off once again, in search of some other herb to add to his bags. A sigh passed his lips and he lifted his head to look up at the sky. It was a surprisingly clear day for it being so far into winter. The winter in general had been mild and that was something he was certainly grateful for. This time on his own would have been much harder if he had to deal with the elements working against him as well.

A breeze kicked up and he let his light blue gaze close to enjoy the light wind tossing his fur. He had to go home. Slowly his eyes opened, his vision full of blue sky. He had to go home. His head tipped back down and he bent to pick up the lamb’s ear Stella had brought him so he could tuck it into his bag. He had to go home. He thought if he just said it to himself enough it would make him actually go.

He just wanted to make sure he was really ready. There wasn’t going to be another chance. That was a lie. He knew his family would never completely turn him away if he continued to leave and return like he had. At least he thought he knew that. He just didn’t want them to have to keep giving him second and third and fourth chances. He wanted this chance to be the real one. He wanted this one to count. He wanted to walk into Abaven with his head held high knowing that he was going to make himself better for all of them. For his father. For Finch. All of them. He breathed in, filling his lungs with the chilly winter air, letting it out in a slow sigh. ”Calm down,” he thought to himself. If he worked himself up over this he’d end up right back where he had been.

He pushed himself to his paws and turned back toward Abaven, glancing to the sky to make sure Stella had seen his movement. It was time to make things right.

I will be making my decision on JUNE 13TH

So this is why I hate adopting wolves out. All three of your apps were beyond amazing, like above and beyond them. I was blown away by the effort you three put into this, I have loved to see so much adoration for Starling. If I could, I would give him to all of you guys. It pretty much came down to who currently or has played a Wrass puppy. I also fought a lot over finally posting this because my insides are tearing up with the feels and the guilt for not picking all of you.

It has been decided that Kea will get Starling, and in the two months she is gone, Monster will be posting him and keeping him active

Once again, thank you all so much for applying. You really touched me with your epic long applications. I love you both! Because I feel bad, and cause I loved your apps so much, Shelby and Keno can pick a character to get free Eve art. Skype me with which one or reply here! And don't try to fight it, I will pick one of my own if you refuse. It will just make me feel a lot better. SO DEAL WITH IT CAUSE EVE CAN'T DO IRL FEELS.