This was it. He couldn't stay here anymore. Not only was the pack growing eerily quiet, but he just couldn't pretend anymore. He wasn't ever going to fit in, and quite frankly he didn't feel like he ever would. Granted, he hadn't really tried most occasions...but he just didn't feel like he was clicking with the pack. He had only stayed with the hope that he might, but it just wasn't happening. He wasn't happy here, nothing was going on, and all that ever really seemed to happen was drama and arguments and he didn't want to be a part of any of it. Without much remorse, the large male lumbered towards the edge of the plains and called out for the alpha. He hoped the man wouldn't keep him waiting. After all, why would he want to keep someone who didn't want to be here? Either way, he was going to leave. But he'd rather do it formally as opposed to just disappearing off into the wilderness. "Talk"

He was surprised to hear a call from Zell. Since the red marked man had joined the pack he hadn't pulled his weight at all, he mostly just sat in the background. He never showed up for pretty much anything, and honestly the pale man was shocked that he hadn't left yet. He even gave a chance at the last meeting for anyone to leave if they wanted, but he had stayed. So what did he want now? With his brows pulling together, he carefully picked his way towards the plains. It was still so bloody hot out, and he didn't like to be under the heat of the sun too much. By the time he had made it there he was panting lightly, his tail flagged out behind him. He took a seat in front of the man, wondering why he had called him to close to the borders. Had he left and was just now coming back? He didn't notice, it wasn't like he had been around much for him to realize he had gone on absence. With a single brow raised, he appraised the taller man. "Yes?" he asked, his tone neutral. "Talk" "You" Think

It hadn't taken long for Bass to show up, and truthfully Zell felt a little on edge. He'd been so indecisive for a long time. He had wanted to stay because he had nothing else, and wanted to leave because there was nothing here for him. He didn't feel like he belonged. But in truth, he probably could have...but he kept himself way too distant. Refusing to let anyone get close because he knew it would be a wasted effort. The only other wolf he'd really sort of liked was Starling, but he didn't even really know where that kid went. And then he had gotten in a fight with Bass at one point, and while he didn't dislike him or have anything against him, he just couldn't see himself really...obeying someone else because of differences in opinion.

And when he had first been accepted into Abaven, it was the older wolf Allen who had told him about what to expect. And honestly, he felt like the old geezer didn't really explain too well. Zell just never felt at home here. "Sorry to bother you but...I needed to talk to you. Or something along those lines I guess." Blue eyes met Bass' gold. His own posture a bit tense because he didn't know what Bass would do. He knew already that the other male probably didn't think anything good of him. He had hardly done anything but cause trouble with that one scarred bitch. Which he still didn't like, but he had a tendency to hold on to grudges anyway. That aside, he continued. "I called you because I'd like to leave. I know I haven't been the best guy to deal with, and it's not a choice I'm making because of you or anything...I just feel like there's something I'm missing. And it's not something this pack can fill..." He was trying real hard to keep his personal emotions and story out of it. Since he had lost his family upon coming to these lands, he simply felt like part of him would never be filled unless he went out and searched.

What the red coloured man had to say honestly didn't surprise him, but he couldn't help the flare of irritation that rose in his chest. His tail flicked behind him, and he dipped his head in understanding. "Why wait until now? In the last meeting I gave everyone a chance to leave, and yet you still stayed," his voice was slightly more hoarse than normal. Sighing, he glanced at the man out of the corner of his eye. "I hope you find what you were looking for Zell, and I'm sorry that Abaven wasn't it," Feeling a bit annoyed by this whole thing, but he knew that if he forced him to stay he wouldn't be helpful. He had hardly done anything since joining, and keeping him here wouldn't be good for either of them. Letting out another sigh, he sat down as his ears folded back slightly. There had been far too many wolves asking to leave lately, and no one else coming in. He was trying his very best to keep Abaven alive, but it would seem that no one wanted to stick around. Was it destined to burn to the earth like all others had been lately? "Talk" "You" Think

He flicked his ears when Bass mentioned the last meeting. Zell knew he could have chosen to leave then, but for some reason he didn't...he couldn't...he didn't want to. He wasn't sure why, but he had chosen to stay. Hoping that whatever plagued his mind and soul would someday sort itself out. But it didn't happen. It wasn't the pack or Bass or anyone here. He knew it was him. He felt restless, not in the sense where he needed to travel, but something inside of him felt restless. He had lost who he was when his parents died in that freak rockslide, and he had steeled himself and fought the world with all the stubbornness he could muster. In the end, he felt like he was doing more damage than good. "I know...I don't have a good excuse as to why I stayed. I guessed it hoped that I could somehow find whatever I was looking for, but...fuck I don't even know what it is!"

He was frustrated for sure. His ears flattening as he struggled to find answers to give to Bass. He felt bad yes. Even though he himself was a pain in the ass to deal with, he didn't want anyone else to deal with it until he figured out some things. There was the chance he would come back. Assuming he was welcomed after this. Or maybe life would lead him down a different path. He never knew what would happen next. Abaven had been a good place, and it still was and would be to those who sought to make it their home. But him? A pack just wasn't for him. Not now. Not yet at least. And he was finally starting to realize that he couldn't give his all to the pack if he barely knew what he wanted. Sighing, he looked away from the shorter male. "I'm sorry...I don't really...know how to explain what I've been feeling...I don't want to keep weighing you and the pack down. I'm no freeloader, and if that is what I have been then I'll make it up to for making you deal with my lousy ass this whole time."

He was slightly surprised by what Zell said to him, taken aback to the point where he just blinked at the man. He had no idea that he had been this troubles, he hadn't really opened him up at all about any of these issues. "It's okay Zell, really..." he said softly, all hints of his anger and irritation wrong. He could have helped him if he would have just reached out to him. "I know we have had our differences, but you always could have come to me and talked about this, maybe we could have figured this all out before you wasted all our time," Bass smirked, slightly teasing but also a touch of seriousness. They would have all had an easier time, probably. He did chuckle when he said that he would make up for it, slowly shaking his head back and forth. "You can repay me by going out there and figuring out what it is you're missing, okay? I wish you the best of luck in your life, Zell. Honestly I do," the pale man said softly, rising to his paws and turning to leave. He took a deep breath, looking over his shoulder with a smile. "Abaven is always here if you find out that you had it all, all along." With that, he took his leave, his tail swaying behind him as he made his way towards the lake. -exit Bass- "Talk" "You" Think