Pressing further north meant finding actual snow, which crunched and popped softly under his paws with every step. At first he'd gone due north, but the weather got even colder that way so he started heading east where there was more plant life and hopefully more bearable weather. He was no explorer, but he'd have to be beyond apathetic to not be amazed and drawn in by the beauty of this place. He'd never explored northern lands before. So far they were beautiful, everything he hoped for and more - like a section of the world that was frozen in the winter season forever. Sunset was fast approaching, the low evening light fading quicker than he would have liked. Originally he'd hoped to be bedded down for the evening, but he wasn't keen on stopping somewhere that lacked shelter so onward he went. The light reflected off of the pale rocks here, giving them a ghostly glow akin to the pale light of the moon or even his own coat. As the sun set his own pulsing fiery pelt would become the brightest patch in the area. Everywhere he looked was filled with ghostly stones. The ancient riverbed went on seemingly forever, though far off ahead of him Ig thought he saw some cliff rising up. Perhaps a cave might be nestled in the base. He could hope at least. Marching forward at a leisurely pace, Ignatius scanned the horizon with curious mismatched eyes. "TALK" "YOU" THINK

Atonement. That was what this journey felt like, from the very day she'd watched the aftermath of what Ignatius's awful brother had done, to when she'd heard rumors of where Ignatius had fled. It felt painfully like she was being punished for every awful thing she'd ever done, like the universe had zeroed in on her and had decided to bombard her with as much possible pain and misery as it could, simply to spite her. That was just what it felt like, though. Perhaps unluckily for her, Kirsi didn't believe in any that bullshit. The world was cruel and wicked and she knew it cared not for justice or making things right. No, it was just as selfish as she was, taking what it wished and giving even less back. Kirsi knew there was no real underlying reason behind anything that had happened to her, or to Ignatius - her own choices, and his brother's, had led to this very moment. She was fully cognizant of that fact and had no interest in pretending otherwise. However, that mindset all but came to a screeching halt when she finally - finally, after so many weeks (or was it months?) of searching - caught a whiff of Ignatius's scent. She had no clue where she was. The wandering had led from familiar lands to only vaguely familiar ones, until finally she was completely and utterly lost. Perhaps she shouldn't have set off from home, and from her family, so soon after birthing a litter of pips, but she was too stubborn to let anyone stop her. Ignatius had been banished, she knew that much, but beyond that she was clueless. All she knew was that he'd left, and she'd been trying desperately to follow his scent ever since. A few times she'd gotten quite close, but she wasn't sure how their reunion would go or how she'd even begin to explain things. Yeah, it started as a big elaborate plan to dethrone you, but then things changed! I swear, Ig! Like there was any way in hell he'd believe that line. She wasn't even entirely sure what she believed anymore half the time. At least this terrain was somewhat familiar to her, in the vague way a place totally unknown to you could be. They reminded her of the lands of her youth, though she'd never quite seen anything like this before. Kirsi was cautious as she descended into the icy ravine, finding that navigating the treacherous rocks was proving difficult in the fading light. She was grateful for the darkness despite the challenges it presented, having always felt more comfortable moving under the cloak of night. How long she walked this canyon, she wasn't sure, but when she finally caught a more solid whiff of Ignatius's scent she felt her breath hitch in her throat. What now? It'd been so many weeks since she'd seen him last - as soon as she'd realized her pregnancy was obvious she'd gotten quite adept at avoiding him, thanks to his brother's threats. Now, she had no idea what he thought of any of it, or what he even knew. She half wondered if she could convince him she'd been held prisoner, but now knowing his brother's cruelty, he'd probably made it fully clear to Ignatius exactly who had helped exile him. Fuck. The slender woman took a deep, shuddering breath as the faint silhouette of someone was finally illuminated up ahead. Ignatius's form (his height, a feature that had always drawn her to him) cast a wide arching shadow down across the stones he walked upon, even from a great distance. Not wanting to startle him, she hesitated before clearing her throat, icy-blue eyes fixed on him a few dozen yards away. The evening was so still and so quiet that she had no doubt he would hear her, but what would his reaction be? She couldn't even begin to guess. She'd never been good at uncertainty and especially now she didn't know how to proceed, led alone how he might react to her.

It was slow going, really. He had to place each paw carefully on the rocks or risk rolling and ankle. Luckily it got easier the longer he continued to navigate the rocks riverbed, and his long stride made most journeys relatively quick in the grand scheme of things anyway. Maybe Ig was a budding adventurer, or maybe he was just smart enough to know he needed to educate himself on the lands he was to inhabit for the forseeable future. Either way, he was quite content as he meandered along. He was halfway to the cliffs before he heard something that would change the course of his evening. It was a soft sound, but there was virtually no ambient noise so her heard it crystal clear. His uncertainty lasted only one precious moment before he knew who that sounded like. How could he not, at one point they'd spent every available second together. Failing to recognize her voice, even from a simple clearing of her throat would be criminal. Once he'd lived and breathed only with her in mind. Forgetting every little detail he'd memorized would be impossible and despite how he felt like his soul was being crushed while his heart was simultaneously squeezed with crushing force when he heard her... Still, forgetting was not an option. Breathless, Ignatius turned to fix the love of his life with his mismatched gaze. There was no warmth there though. Even his blood red eye was frigid as he assessed her for the briefest of moments. After their time apart, Kirsi was still as stunning as she was in his memories. "You have a lot of explaining to do and not a lot of time to do it in." he stated at last, his expression unreadable, his posture exuding nothing but a cold stoicism. "TALK" "YOU" THINK

Kirsi was the sort of wolf that didn't falter in the face of anything. She'd been known for her frustratingly aloof demeanor since childhood, one that never seemed to be visibly affected by anything. That cool, disinterested mask she'd always worn was as much proactive as it was reactive; it wasn't just there to protect what was inside, but to affect the wolves around her so they never got a chance to know what Kirsi was really like. Somehow, Ignatius had snuck his way into her heart, quite unintentionally, growing quite fond of his childhood defiance and his quiet but genuine character. Somewhat frustratingly, he'd ruined the plans she'd concocted with his brother but slowly, over time, she had found that her interests had changed entirely. Of course, nothing ever really worked out quite so easily, nor the way you expected it sometimes, and thus... here she was. Trailing after Ignatius like a lost puppy dog, after having avoided him for for nearly two seasons now, nearly sick to her stomach at the thought of facing the consequences of what she'd done. Maybe she wouldn't have to face them all though, at least not all at once. One thing at a time. She inhaled sharply when Ignatius heard her and slowly turned to face her. The brilliant dual markings of fire and ice seemed to gleam in the faint moonlight, and she wished badly she could rush forward and embrace him. I did this all for you, Ignatius, you stupid fool, was all she could think. Her actions, no matter how awful they had been, had been working towards a much bigger picture - but she knew, as soon as he demanded an explanation, that there was no way she could undo all of her wrongs in one breath. She tried to fight back a sigh, moving forward slowly to close the distance between them, but not daring to cross the threshold of personal space no matter how badly her body longed to. "This was all your brother's doing," Kirsi explained, keeping her voice contained - as much as she could. Hopefully he wouldn't mistake her calmness for disinterest; she knew it was no time for being too spirited, and she feared one misstep and she'd end up crumbling entirely. It was easier to keep her pain to herself than share it with Ignatius, knowing he would be forever changed in the face of what his brother had done, and what Kirsi had done first. "I swear it, Ignatius. I..." her voice faltered, her mind whirling as she searched for what exactly she could say. The cold expression he wore was painful enough to look at, reminding her of his brother more than himself, and seeing this side of him pained her. "What did your brother tell you, Ig?"  She needed to know what he'd told Ignatius before she said anything, lest she say too much and truly ruin anything.. if it was even salvageable to begin with.

Of course when Sephira showed up he should've guessed it was possible that others would appear. Maybe deep down he'd known it was likely but chose not to admit it fully. Either way, having Kirsi here before him felt like he was having the wind knocked out of him again and again the longer he looked at her. There was a horrible constricting feeling in his chest. Not knowing what was the truth and what wasn't made this even more painful - how could he know if what she said was true? Kaius was obviously a liar and a sick twisted monster, but her reaction didn't tell him what he'd hoped to hear. "This was all your brother's doing," she said. Red and blue eyes flashing, Ig felt a bitter laugh bubbling up from his chest. With a shake of his head he fought to remain composed. He wasn't just fighting with the heartbreak and betrayal he felt because of Kirsi, no, that anger and resentment, that wrathful fire he'd been brewing ever since he'd decided Kaius' life was forfeit the minute he got within a mile of Ignatius again was all coming back to the surface along with it. "I was well aware of that," he began, gaze locking back onto hers as he spoke in the most deadly serious tone he'd probably ever used in his life, much less with Kirsi, "From the very second I laid eyes on my sister's body." There was pain in his face as he regarded her for a bit. Despite his best efforts to conceal his feelings beneath a mask of anger, Ignatius never had been able to escape the fact that he always wore his emotions plain as day, etched on his features so well almost anyone could read them without much effort. Casting his eyes skyward, he drew a breath. Trying to believe that Kirsi hadn't been involved was clearly not going to work anymore. Truth be told, he'd even tried making up excuses for what that bastard brother told him, but suddenly they seemed foolish and incapable of blanketing over the reality of what he was sure he was going to discover as this conversation went on. Living in ignorance suddenly seemed preferable. Perhaps then he could easily forgive her and move on. But... no. If he didn't know the truth, he'd still never trust her again the way he had once before. "Enough. He told me that you are a part of it, from the very beginning. That it was all a lie, a plot to take the throne from me and that you played me like an instrument. That you helped-" He couldn't finish that thought. Should he have seen it coming? Hadn't Sephira had some beef with her? Maybe if he'd been a little less smitten... "Are you going to tell me something different?" He wished she would. He wished he'd believe it. "TALK" "YOU" THINK

Though she knew exactly what she could tell him to make him believe her - the truth - she couldn't bring herself to lay everything out on the table quite yet. Sharing the burden of their loss with him, though it was likely the right thing to do, given it was his loss too, didn't seem like the best idea at the moment. The last thing Kirsi wanted to do was to hurt Ignatius; despite everything she had done, she had grown to love him more fiercely than she ever dreamt possible. Her childish hopes and aspirations had gone terribly awry, and after getting mixed up in his brother's business she wasn't sure how to untangle herself from any of it now. She felt oddly weightless as she stood here before her former lover, small beneath his cold gaze, a feeling she'd never quite felt around him before. His cold laughter pierced her heart, and she visibly flinched, the expression visible even under the faint moonlight. His next words cut even deeper. "Your.. your sister?" That was who Valkorion had framed Ignatius for killing? She had been far away from the lands when it had all happened - no, actually long before, not wanting Ignatius to find her lest he ruin Valkorion's plans and thus threaten the safety of their unborn children - but she hadn't known he meant to kill her. No, she would've never agreed to that, but then again she'd been backed into a corner it had been hard to find a way out from. "Oh, Ig... I'm.." The pain in her sigh was evident, though she knew apologies wouldn't help now. Her voice quivered, the sudden grief a weird sight to see washing over the normally quite composed and icy woman, but she couldn't help the emotions from rolling over her now that she was in Ignatius's presence once again. "He... he used me," Kirsi admitted, reigning in some of her emotions, if only to try to explain herself. Ignatius wanted answers, and the clock was ticking down. If she stumbled over her words for too long, she was convinced he might leave entirely, and she hadn't spent so long searching for him only for him to turn her away. But how could she begin to tell him the truth, and make him truly believe her now? "As a child, I'll admit looked up to Valkorion," she admitted slowly, cautiously, purposefully not using his nickname. "That was before I knew what sort of creature he was. What he was capable of. He convinced me he had been wronged, that the throne was rightfully his, and that if I could help him win it back I'd earn a place at his side." Kirsi was tense, knowing very well that Ignatius would catch on to what she'd been implying. Hopefully. She'd wormed his way into Ig's life as a child, feigning a crush that had manifested into something very real, charming him until somehow he had turned the tables and she had grown enamored with him. "Over time I realized how I really felt. About you, and about your vile brother," she spoke, a low growl beginning to creep up deep within her chest. By the time she'd gotten too deeply mixed up with Ignatius, Valkorion knew too much about her and knew how to play her well enough that she couldn't quite cut ties with him completely. "I never meant to hurt you, or anyone, but you know how Valkorion is. He... knew exactly how to play off my fears and threatened me to help. I thought..." Her words trailed off, her voice quivering now. What she wouldn't give to make him believe her. "I thought I'd wait and find you once it was all over, once we were both safe, free to start our lives somewhere else." And our family, she thought bitterly to herself. "I never knew what he was framing you for, and if I'd know what he was planning... I would've never..." But really, Valkorion had a way of knowing exactly how to get a wolf to comply to his demands, and if he had no qualms with even killing newborn pups, what else might he do? Kirsi heaved a sigh, waiting with baited breath to see if he'd even begin to believe her.

Had his throat ever felt so tight before? It was all Ig could do to keep his expression neutral as she reacted to his words. All that had transpired left him disinclined to trust or give her the benefit of the doubt. Her words and actions had done nothing yet to even begin to convince him that he should reconsider how he felt about her. Then again, at this point he didn't even really know how to feel about her. As she went on, his overall discomfort increased. So that part was true. He wished it wasn't with all his heart and soul. Suddenly his memories felt somehow corrupted, tainted, blackened by the touch of Valkorion's manipulating hand in his life. It felt like when he met Kirsi's gaze it was through different eyes than he'd used before. Suddenly when he saw her, the new perspective made her different. "I... I'm not sure what I'm supposed to make of all this. At first, when I saw Avis there and then was forced to leave without so much as a goodbye to anyone, I'd held out hope that at least it was only that bastard that was responsible. When he came to gloat and rub his apparent victory in my face, I didn't want to believe him." For a moment, Ignatius simply broke off into silence, trying in vain to reorganize his thoughts and keep his emotions in check, yet he couldn't stop his lips from pursing slightly or the sheen his eyes had. Stepping back and to the side a few paces, he gave her a sidelong look before exhaling a breath he hadn't realized he'd held. "I'm not entirely certain what else to say, Kirsi. I'm pretty sure I should be pissed at you. Somehow I don't want to be though. But I also can't just let go of the fact that everything we had was initially built on a foundation of deception." After taking a few steps away, he paused, and added, "If any part of it was real, the best thing you can offer me right now is space and time. I'm not interested in losing anyone else but... I can't trust myself right now to make a rational decision about how to handle... us." "TALK" "YOU" THINK

Usually a master of disguise, Kirsi didn't had the strength to keep the pain from her own features. She wore it plainly for him to see, hoping he might somehow be able to comprehend the depths of her heartache. Instead of seeming sympathetic, instead he seemed more perturbed as she spoke and struggled to explain herself, and she felt her own waning composure growing more fractured, splintering like cracking ice.  "You can't believe Valk anyway, no matter what he says to you," Kiris started, only realizing she'd used his nickname when it was too late. Speaking his name still made her cringe, and she felt bile rising in the back of her throat at the thought of him. Of course, he hadn't been completely dishonest with Ignatius, but he hadn't been entirely truthful with him either... Finally she released the breath she'd been holding, in a shaky sigh. It was difficult to watch the way his eyes seemed to gloss over, and she averted her gaze temporarily, finding it hard to look at him. It was clear he was distraught, and didn't know what to think or feel. She didn't entirely blame him, not with all the information she'd thrown at him today, and it was less surprising than she wanted it to be when he said he wanted time and space away from her. Personally, that was the last thing she wanted but she wasn't willing to shatter whatever semblance of a relationship they had left by ignoring his wishes. "As you wish," was all she could manage to choke out, feeling the world swaying beneath her paws now. "If you decide to talk more... please come find me." Was there anything really left to be said? Kirsi wished she could say more, but Ignatius had asked for space and space was what she would give him. Heaving another sigh, she finally turned to leave, wondering how soon it would be until she heard from him again. -exit Kirsi-