Erani

Erani lay curled at the center of a meadow, feeling drained and tired. Gabriel had changed so much from the quiet pup he?d started out as, and he wasn?t even seven months old yet. Her eyes clamped shut. He hadn?t come home last night. And he was still missing. She had just finished a circuit in search for him, but had lost him at the border, near a creek that had been broken recently. Erani sighed, ears flat. She was afraid. So afraid for him. He was reminding her more and more of Neo. She wondered if he?d met the two year old at some point and Neo had spewed hatred at him. She knew Gabriel had been sore about Epiphron leaving to be with Maverick. It was as if her assurances that she wasn?t leaving for good had flown right over the pup?s head. ?Oh Gabriel? I?m going to lose you before you?re even grown, aren't I?? The whisper was wrought with unshed tears.

The evening was cool, temperate and soft. The air a chilling reminder that even in these months cold could still bite at his flesh, gnaw it's way into his core. A sigh rumbled from the man and he continued to move. he had wanted to do something or Valhalla and of the recent months that had turned into making sure that all children were on their way home as dark fell. With the recent wars and challenges rumoring around alacritis, it was an interest prospect that he keep his loved ones safe, especially while he was capable of doing so.

A soft whisper carried it's way from the silhouette of a white woman, riding on the air. A soft smile turned up on Cairo's lips and he immediately changed course to come to her. Head lowered as he attempted to touch his nose to her shoulder he offered her a kind hearted look, "Are you alright, Erani? Why are you so downcast?" he wanted to know what was chilling his dearest friend, something was truly bothering her, and he knew not what to do about it.

Erani

Pawsteps approaching her, made an ear pull toward the sound. From the tread, she recognized Cairo. His steps had slowed in his old age, but they still carried strength of will. That strength would never die, even as his age took hold. She felt the brush of his nose against her fur, and the gentle questions. ?My younger son, Gabriel. Lately? I feel as though I?m losing him as we lost Neo. He hasn?t taken Epiphron?s Wedding well, Cairo. He doesn?t seem to understand that she isn?t betraying him by following her heart. He wanders alone, and leaves the Borders and I worry every time I look up and he?s not there.? Her ears clamped down against her head, eyes searching for the wise sapphires centered in the beloved graying brown face. ?What if he learns to hate me, hate his family, hate Valhalla like Neo did? What if he dies out there?? She leaned against his leg, seeing the evening landscape through a blur. ?I love my children with all I have, And Nova. I lost Neo and Preston has just? Vanished. I don?t think I could take losing one of my own blood?? She shook her head, a quick, jerky motion of desperation. ?I don?t want him to wander the world alone? I lost my entire pack, and thought I?d lost my brother. I had no choice but to wander alone. I don?t want him to choose being alone.? She had a feeling her words weren?t making all that much sense. She couldn?t seem to string a comprehensive sentence together. But she felt as though she needed to get everything out. All of it. ?Did I ever tell you how I came to Starlite?? It was a quietly voiced question.

Cairo was a friend to many and an adviser to all. There was no wolf that he wouldn't point in the right direction, now one had to realize that being pointed in the right direction and choosing to go there were two separate things. Cairo had long ago accepted that even though he attempted to help everyone, he would never be able to save everyone. Heck, he himself had brought death to the doorstep of so many and found himself to be ultimately prevalent. It was a nice thought to think one's self so untouchable, and yet even he knew that, soon, death would wrap his grueling fingers around his heart and stop the beating. A smile of comfort crossed his lips and he listened to Erani's words fade off, "Not all children do what we want them to do...Erani. It doesn't mean it's your fault, it just means somewhere along the way someone introduced them to something they didn't need. They'll either come running back, or they stray. It's a process in life. A painful one. Neo, ran from my side after I swore to protect him. Syrinx and Eos...no one knows what those two are doing...worse yet, what they are capable of,"


He offered her a warm look before shaking his head easily to her, giving her a firm 'no' and allowing her to have the floor, though first, he had to admit, "Tell me your story, and I'll tell you something that, perhaps, I should have said long ago," He didn't want to rush her, but he knew where he stood with the cards of life, and if they were running as thin as he was sure they were, he wanted everything off his chest and to be used as free information. No more locking things up, no more being curious. He wanted her to have whatever she wanted, to know all that she could stand.

9

Erani

She listened to his words, and some of the ache left. The ache that eased away was from Neo?s change, his leaving. A quiet nod was given, as he mentioned Syrinx and Eos. She worried for those two. Syrinx hadn?t returned with Eos after she?d sent him to find her, when Cairo had collapsed at the meeting where Chrysanthe had taken the mantle. And oh how glad she was that Chrysanthe and Epiphron had gotten what they had wanted. Deep blue?s studied him as he bade her to tell her story, then fell to the snowy ground between her paws. And she began to speak. ?I was born in a pack known as Redwood Pack, to Aobhinne and Alorek, the lead Healers of the pack. They were said to be the best healers in the area, other than the Nomads, who were our allies. There was an agreement between Redwood pack and the Nomads, that our warriors would train the newer generations in the Nomads to defend themselves and fight back, and one of their healers would mate into the pack. My father was a Nomad. In a way, I suppose it?s like arranged marriages in your family. But these joinings were only done if the two wolves in question loved one another. Wolves in love work stronger together. My mother is also descended from the Nomads. She and Alorek were one of those stories you hear about love at first sight.? Her eyes warmed at the thought of them, and the memory of them in the dream she?d had the night she?d nearly died. ?I?m rambling? I and my siblings were born, and Cormalin, the largest in our litter, was chosen to be trained to be the next Beta male. Our Alphas were Amoren, and Adania, who was my mother?s sister. She was barren, and could not produce heirs to take on the mantle after they were gone. But Amoren would never have mated with another female to produce heirs. I suppose that was why I was chosen? We were at war with the pack to the west, Blackmoon pack. One of the stories the elders told us as pups was that the alpha of Blackmoon pack was Amoren?s brother, and that Redwood pack used to be called Whitemoon pack, before Fenrin, Amoren?s brother, led a revolt in an attempt to gain the throne. ?Amoren?s father made him the Alpha just before he died from his wounds, and later, Amoren drove Fenrin and his followers away, far west, into a forest that would make Tortuga?s old territory look like a field of flowers in comparison. Ever since that victory, Redwood Pack, and Blackmoon pack had been at war. In Redwood, training in fighting began at six months. I had always been far more interested in watching my mother and father work their Craft in healing. I asked so many questions, what was that plant, why was that wolf whining, and so on. So she taught me, and my father taught me. And the Alpha male took special interest in me, teaching me tricks in fighting only he knew, and the finer points in honor, and so on. All the things a future Alpha should know, I suppose? But I didn?t realize that until young Sarak told us. ?Meanwhile, wolves of our pack had been suffering attacks from Blackmoon members while on patrols, like the night I was attacked. My mother and father were having to treat injuries left and right, and we had to bury some of our warriors, and one of our hunters. And then, when I and my siblings reached our sixth month of age, the attacks slowed to a trickle, and three wolves from Blackmoon came to the borders and called Amoren. The head of the trio, Blizzard, spun him a tale with his silver tongue, saying that they had run away from Fenrin?s pack, and sought refuge in Redwood.? The deep blue pools stilled, glazing slightly with icy anger. And her next words were flat. ?It was a lie. Their true purpose was to get themselves accepted into Redwood Pack, gather information while they let Redwood get used to them. The other two were Boulder and Shadow. Blizzard, white as snow, with the palest blue eyes. Shadow, black as darkness, his lower jaw marked with the color of blood, and his paws just the same, and his eyes a deep crimson. Boulder, the very color of his name, eyes a poison green, and with intelligence that suited his name. You?ll remember these three. ?Amoren?s strengths that would have served well for any other wolves that had come to our borders failed him that day. His willingness to give second chances, and his hope that something good would come from the thunderstorm. He accepted them into the pack. They stayed in Redwood for the next six months of my life. I often noticed the white one Blizzard slipping off every few days, and when he came back, he always looked pleased. Boulder?? A shudder of disgust wracked her form, and her lip curled, showing one canine. ?One only had to look at him to see that he enjoyed killing, that he would happily kill a pup for sport. He often made jokes about the pups, myself included, that involved different ways to disembowel a pup, and what parts tasted best. ?Shadow was? Unusual. He almost never spoke, but always seemed nearby, watching. He was unnerving, and his name suited him. I think that if he had had a chance? Perhaps he could have changed. I seemed to have caught his attention, and sometimes, it seemed as though he was about to say something, but then he got afraid and slunk away. In any case, my siblings and I continued our training, and I trained with my parents in the Healing Craft, and Amoren continued his private training of me. And then Spring came? And my life was ripped out from under my paws. ?I had slipped away early in the morning, wanting to gather herbs to surprise my mother with. I found several. Mint, Poppies, Lavender?. When I came back?? She closed her eyes tight, breath shuddering from her nostrils. ?When I came back, my pack was laying there. Strewn about, ripped apart, faces twisted in the agony they had felt before they?d died. My mother, my father, my siblings. My mentor and Alpha? All of them. Except Cormalin. He spent his energy on one word. ?Run?. And I obeyed him. I ran, without looking back. Ever since then I thought he was dead, until Valhalla reformed on this territory, when Collision spotted Obsidian for the first time. ?The? The first year alone, I nearly died from starvation. I didn?t care. I... wanted to die, but something always pushed me on, forced me to eat from whatever I could find. My hunting training hadn?t been completed. When shock faded away, and I was more aware? I was lost, miles from my home. After that, I hunted what I could, and that was barely enough to stay alive.. Sleep was? Horrible. Nightmares? My first winter alone was the worst winter that land had seen in years. It stayed for three months beyond the usual length of winter. The only thing I had going for me, was the fact that old animals perished from the cold. Usually, when I found one, other scavengers had already eaten most of that animal. I was never so glad to see Spring as I was at the end of that winter. And that Spring was better. I had come to a sort of understanding. And then I managed my first kill of a larger animal. She was an ancient doe, and the way her front legs were so swollen, it was a wonder that she?s lived that long. With that kill, I started to live again. I started training myself to hunt, and even though it was dangerous, I trained myself in hunting larger prey alone. My full interest in healing returned, and I taught myself what I could about plants, testing them for effects.? She lifted her eyes to the sky, studying the stone grey clouds that threatened more snow. ?I ran across a loner that year. The first wolf I had seen since? He was babbling? And then he attacked me. It was a quick fight, and I was uninjured, and he ran off, still rambling nonsense. After that, I decided to stay away from wolves for a while. But in my third year, I came across a loner pair, expecting their first litter, and they took me in for a few months, and they wanted me to stay, but when I decided to keep going, they told me about a pack. Yours. The female had been a healer and she taught me more about healing, told me what the plants I had tested were, and their uses. And when I left, I left with her blessing. So, I wandered a little longer, before I found the borders of Starlite? And your sister, Maya, accepted me into the family. And I suppose you know the rest.? She finished softly, taking a deep breath and lowering her gaze to his face. ?I think you would have liked Amoren, and he you. And my parents would have been glad to see that I?ve remade my life. You, and Valhalla have given me back my life, and so much more than that. My nightmares are gone. Blizzard, Boulder and Shadow chase me no longer.? She blinked slightly, throat tight. "And you? What is your story, if I may ask?"

Cairo knew that in asking her for her tale he would be given something that was immense, that was long, and that was a bit windy. He wanted to understand where she had come from, what had made her the seemingly perfect woman she was. Cairo had never been extremely disapointed in Erani, and he had to be honest, though there were bumps in the road, he was not without his joy in seeing her, was not without his smile when it came to her, even if he couldn't bare it on his face. She was the metaphorical one that got away, one that wouldn't ever be had, but that was alright. He didn't doubt love when it came to her, because, though they had never been together it all seemed more real with her than anything else. She was beyond what he had expected to have in life, and in everything, she was still standing at his side. He didn't have to worry, he didn't have to break down, and he knew that when he did she was there. Perhaps, taken for granted at times, she was strong, and she knew the depths of his love, but not necessarily the attachments.

"I realized you came more mature for your age than most I had met, Erani, but I didn't realize your tale was quite so long, so detailed, and so thorough. It makes me consider my life, and I guess, it seems long, but everything has been pretty dry even at the most complicated times. You're strong, you know that? You stand firm no matter what, you stay by who you are even when everyone tells you that you're wrong. It's impressive," he chuckled lightly, "You've always been impressive. My rock, you know," there was no doubt in his mind that she would hold back the hurt to his heart if she could, she wouldn't turn and run, but the same was for her. He would stand by her, side by side, until they had done all they could, and even in death he wouldn't falter to watch her, to care for her when he could. Everything else, thinking anything else was purely wrong.

"I've got something to tell you," he sighed and looked off into the setting sun, his ears rolling back lightly against his head, as he watched them he looked in the distance and could see the faintest storm clouds coming in. Funny...a storm...what, was this? Oh well, all good days came with some haze at the end. No problem. "The sun, it's pretty, no?" he questioned her, oddly enough, before waving a paw into the air, looking at the massive expanse that was Valhalla, "But, everything it touches is even more beautiful," he watched her, faded blue eyes finding hers, those same eyes that had never lost their colour, those eyes that seemed not to tolerate a dull moment. So full of life. "You're like the sun, Erani. Everything you touch seems so much more beautiful," it was a gift to have.

"I have a dislike for Nova," that much he would attest to, at least first-hand, but he could not say such a thing without explaining it to her, without being smart, without allowing her to know what was happening. He stood up and watched her with a smile on his face, "The reason is quite simple--" maybe, to him it was...or it wasn't. Love had never been his forte, it always seemed to break him, to ail him, and he didn't want that to be his prerogative when it came to her. He did not want her to have the same issues in her life. That would...break him. --He got to have you when I could never even touch you," he laughed lightly and turned his head down as a sigh broke his laughter and he stared at his paws.

"I loved you, Erani. I mean, I still love you I love you more than anything, and it's become different over the years, it started off with the love one should give a stranger, then it became love as a friend and comrade, and for so long, through Alice, Crusade, and Guinevere, I thought that was all it was, but I was wrong. I love you as more than that, and you're the one thing in this life, like Crusade, the stars told me I couldn't have. It's difficult, to accept, but I thought you should know. It's been my dying wish to tell you I love you-- To tell you how I truly felt," Maybe it would seem odd, maybe it would be hard, but he didn't need to expand so much, "That is my story, Erani. It became more of you than you know. You've always kind of been my strength,"

Erani

Erani watched him as he absorbed her tale, wondering what he must be thinking. Finally, he spoke, and she detected an odd note somehow. His words made her head tilt in surprise, one ears cocking back after the ones following his soft chuckle. His rock? He was her rock, not the other way around. She couldn?t help the puzzlement that crossed her face. ?I have to be strong. Calm, collected. How else would I be able to attend to an injured and panicky wolf?? She trailed off as he said he had something to tell her, her ears pressing forward to listen. What he said didn?t match the way he?d said that. She followed his gaze to the setting sun, noting the storm that gathered. A sure sign of Spring chasing winter away. It was odd, so early in the season? Cairo questioned her, and she looked up at him. He gestured to encompass the expanse of Valhalla, and went on. She smiled. ?It does. And the moon as well, turning grass to silver.? His next words made her mind stutter to a halt and stare. What? ?Cairo?? He didn?t like Nova? Then? ?Then why did you allow?? Cairo was speaking again. She felt her breath catch on the surprise she felt. But? Cairo loved Guinevere? And then he dropped the rest onto her. As Cairo spoke Erani stared up into the wise sapphire eyes that had faded with age. They were sincere; he wasn?t lying, but then, he had never once lied to her. Not ever. A funny, confused sensation roiled in her chest. Confusion, a crazy sense of joy, terror, sadness? Love. It was there; it had always been there for the male. It came up in a choked sound, akin to a sob and a laugh. Other than that, she was speechless. So she put it into actions, rising to lean into the male, taking strength, until her throat and mind had cleared enough for speech. When she spoke, her voice felt rusty. ?You have always been there for me. I often wondered how you managed to always be there when I needed you most. When those three attacked me. When the others attacked later. Even in sleep. When we first arrived in the Old land, before I had my den, I had a nightmare, one of many. The three were chasing me, closing in. Then as they were about to strike, you called a meeting outside the dream. Your call filtered into the dream They ran, tails tucked? You?ve always been able to pull my mind away from bad memories. You are my strength too, and as long as you are in my heart, you?ll never be truly gone, not even when your body is gone. I love you too, Cairo. If you had asked? I would have accepted you, but? You never did.? She trailed off. Then asked softly, ?Is this why you gave me your children when? Because it didn?t end in a week.? The question was tentative.