Ignatius was gone. She couldn't deny it any longer. It'd been a hard truth to admit, especially at first, and when he'd hadn't shown up when the white-pelted male had called to challenge for his throne it'd been her gut instinct to convince herself that there had to be some explanation. Perhaps Ignatius had simply been too far from home to answer the call. Perhaps he would return, with some explanation of his disappearance. But Kirsi remained in the lands he had laid claim to, and his scent slowly faded until she could hardly catch a whiff of him anywhere. Only briefly did she let sadness grip her. The feeling of longing for him was replaced quickly with something like anger - dull and hardly present at all, at least at first, though slowly she felt it consuming her like a plague. Had his forgiveness been merely a masquerade? She'd been close, so close, to telling him the truth of everything that had happened... and then he slipped from her paws like water, without giving her a chance to tighten her grip on him. A sigh fell from her lips as she picked herself up from the ground, where she'd been slumped against the side of a oversized redwood tree. It was hard to know exactly where she needed to go next, but she needed to keep moving. Luckily, she wasn't the type to wallow in her own pity forever... instead her indignation fueled her and pushed her forward, though without any clear path. Once, she'd been fully convinced that he'd been the center of her universe, but given how fully he'd fallen away from her she was beginning to realize she'd been mistaken. Blinded by love, so to speak. A slight sneer touched her lips as she picked up her pace, grateful to feel the cool breeze whipping through her coat as she broke into a steady trot.

He wasn’t sure what to do with himself. Not having the pack for guidance and purpose shook the white coated Destruction. He’d found himself again in the lands once known as Fyri, only sure that he wished to remain in the northern reaches. He was also worried about Kirsi. He knew she and Ignatius had… something between them. They had been very close until Ig was suddenly gone. He hoped the man was unharmed, but he felt a little betrayed that he hadn’t even tried to tell anyone where he might be.

He debated about joining up with Acere, he knew as much about the pale warrior as he did Ignatius when he’d agreed to join Fyri. Still, as someone who considered the fiery alpha a friend, he couldn’t go without seeing how Kirsi was doing, and what she might do. He liked to think he could call her his friend as well, and he wanted to offer his support if she needed.

He found her scent in the lands they’d called home for a short time, and his tall form trailed after her. ”Kirsi?” He called out, hoping she might hear him. He couldn’t see her through the trees, but it hadn’t been long since her icy paws carried her through.

Perhaps this was just karma - not that she really believed in anything quite as foolish as that - for the way she'd carefully manipulated Ignatius over the years. Her feelings in the end had been genuine, though the path she'd taken to get there had been cloaked in deceit. The journey never seemed quite as important as the destination, at least to her, though after all she'd taken and subsequently sacrificed, she couldn't shake the feeling that she was back where she'd started. If she'd never gotten tangled up with Lucien, she wouldn't have gotten involved with Ignatius... and if she'd had children, they'd still be here, walking this earth where they ought to be. It hurt. The memories of her children far more than Ignatius's abandonment. Losing them had felt like a piece of her soul had been ripped straight from her chest - and while Ignatius disappearing felt crushing, it filled her with a renewed sense of purpose rather than leave her feeling empty inside. How dare he leave her. If he ever returned, she'd make sure he'd be the one begging for forgiveness and redemption. The brief bout of sadness was quick to transform into anger... though as soon as a familiar voice touched her ears, she felt that rage melt like ice under a hot flame. Fluidly her posture slackened, spinning around to search for him in the distance. Dainty paws carried her toward the sound of his voice, feeling her body slacken further when he finally came into view. There was some relief in the fact that someone had stuck around, even after Ignatius had abandoned Fyri, though the way her brows furrowed and her lips quivered subtly took considerably effort. "Oh, Song," she sighed, somewhat breathily as she came to a halt near him. Her instincts were torn between putting on a facade of utter grief at the disappearance of her once-mate, and tucking herself against his much larger form, and showing emotional strength in the face of a situation that surely would upset any reasonable wolf. She settled somewhere in the middle, masking her rage and instead giving off an aura of dejection, with the way her shoulders slumped and her voice softened into hardly above a whisper. "He's gone, isn't he? I tried convincing myself he might come back, at least for me, but..." Clearly that wasn't the case, no matter how hard she'd tried to convince herself of it, and Kirsi couldn't shake the feeling that she'd been the one taken advantage of his time.

She appeared before him after he called out for her, the tumultuous emotions obvious on her features despite her efforts to hide them. He offered her a compassionate smile as his ears fell to his head in a silent apology. Not that he had done anything to cause her grief, but to add his condolences. ”Oh, Song.” She uttered softly while taking her place before him. She seemed to withdraw in on herself, a shadow of what she had been the day he’d met her. ”He’s gone, isn’t he?” The words made him frown as he felt disappointed in Ignatius that superseded his abandonment of his pack.

”I think he is,” Song offered softly. He was doing his best to offer what support he could in appropriate ways. He wanted to scoop her up and tell her everything was going to be alright. That Ig would return and he’d recreate Fyri anew. He couldn’t though, who knew if the man was still alive. If he’d left a woman such a Kirsi without even a word.. Song feared the worst but he wouldn’t put voice to those doubts. ”Now that Fyri is gone..” He hated saying it, the pack had really become his home.

”What will you do?” He asked, curious but also hoping he didn’t push her too far. ”I.. can I help at all?” Two pairs of eyes were better than one, and if she wished his presence he’d remain beside her. If she sent him away he would go.

Song responded to her grief just as she hoped he might - sympathetically and with visible concern. She wondered, briefly, if he would feel for her if he'd known even half of the story that made up the life she and Ignatius had shared - was her grief and anger justifiable in the face of what she'd done? She didn't know enough about Song and what kind of man he was to properly answer that question. Kirsi supposed only time would tell... A soft sigh sounded at his answer, though she'd expected as much. Being reassured that he would come home wouldn't help her now, because she truly doubted it, and she was glad Song didn't try convince her of that. Perhaps their paths would cross again someday, but she wasn't so sure of it, and she certainly wouldn't sit around waiting for him.. let alone go looking for him. Her gaze lifted to meet Song's as he asked a question that she herself had been mulling over since Ignatius's throne had been declared abandoned. What would she do? Returning home wasn't an option, and even if it was she had a feeling her reputation had been so tarnished at this point that showing her face would be a dangerous idea. "I'm.. not totally sure," she sighed softly, moving to recline to her haunches, though not before shuffling a bit closer to him. Her need for physical company was not feigned - she had always prided herself on being emotionally strong, on not depending on anyone but herself, but there was something undeniable comforting about being in close proximity to another.. especially a man of Song's size. That was a need she wasn't at all ashamed of. "I didn't think I'd be asking myself this question again," she admittedly softly, her voice growing more unsteady, though there was no threat of tears. "I.. wouldn't mind your company for awhile. It's nice to be in the company of someone you can trust," Kirsi noted carefully, her head lifting. "Unless you have plans of your own? Where would you be without Fyri?"

Her decision hadn’t been made at the point of Song asking her what kind of plan she might have. The answer didn’t surprise him, he wasn’t sure what he would do yet either. He had seriously considered joining up with Acere at the battlefield, but Kirsi had given him cause to pause. Thinking more deeply than his first reaction wasn’t his strongest attribute, but doing so now helped pave the way for further discussion. He wanted challenge in his life and it was being given to him. "I'm.. not totally sure,” she spoke uncertainty as she scooted closer to him.

Her voice lost its strength as she continued, and he couldn’t blame her. He missed his friend, but he knew his relationship with Ignatius was nowhere as deep as the one Kirsi shared with him. His ivory white ears fell to his skull as she found easy agreement in remaining close to one another, as long as he hadn’t any plans. Song shook his golden marked features, ”No, Id still be wandering the northern reaches aimlessly were it not for Fyri.” He had been a wayward soul, and could easily fall back into that role. ”I thought briefly about joining Acere, only because he is in the North and I felt the discipline of a pack had been rather good for me.”

It was deeply unnerving for the plan she'd always had for her future, carefully constructed in her head, to suddenly be cast aside. Was there any possibility of a future with Ignatius? For so long she'd feared there might not be one at all, but as soon as she'd gotten him back he'd disappeared just as quickly. That aching emptiness she'd felt after being without him for so many months was threatening to return now, only its effects were different, and she felt far angrier than she ever remembered feeling before. The same question though continued to echo in her head: what now? She needed a plan, a course of action, and she couldn't shake the feeling that somehow Song might play into things - or at least be a means to an end. It felt oddly like she was drowning, drifting into the body of a deep, dark lake and that he was her only way out. The fact that he admitted he had nowhere else to be only solidified her sudden train of thought. Perhaps their relationship could be a mutually beneficial one, though she supposed only time would really tell... "The north - lands like this - have always been my home," she breathed wistfully, thinking on his words. She knew nothing of this man Acere, but she knew integration with a pack was both a safe move as well as a wise one. Perhaps there she could find purpose, or at least orient herself toward what she needed to do. "I'd be willing to see if this pack of his might be suitable for us. I have to agree, pack life has always suited me best," she lied easily. Kirsi had always flourished in packs, sure.. she knew how to play the politics that kept groups afloat and she'd always found a way to make things work in her favor, though the life of a loner certainly seemed the most ideal to her. She hoped Song might agree.

Song hadn’t been born in the Nothern reaches but he felt the call of them. The icy lands were his chosen home, and he had little intention of venturing far from them. Knowing that Kirsi felt the same way in not so many words warmed him to her further. Us, he was startled as how good the words sounded when it fell from Kirsi’s lips. She was willing to give Acere and Winterfell a try, Song nodded.

”We don’t have to go right away,” he found himself saying in answer. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to up and head over to the pack at that very moment. ”I mean, I don’t have any pressing matters to attend. There’s no rush to fling ourselves at the pack.” He chuckled softly in amusement. Really he wanted a bit of time to say goodbye to Fyri and all Ignatius wished it to stand for. They were small, but the man had some hefty visions.

Song had very much enjoyed his time with the fiery alpha, but life had to go on. They couldn’t linger here and fade away like Ignatius. Song needed purpose, and challenge in his life. Hopefully Acere would be able to offer just that. The Destruction man sighed softly as his icy blue gaze shifted back to Kirsi’s small form. ”I think I’ll miss Fyri,” he admitted quietly. He wasn’t sure how she felt about its loss, but he guessed she held similar sentiments.

Surely with time, a new vision for her future would grow clear. It was easy to feel overwhelmed and directionless now, but she knew digging herself into an anxious hole wouldn't help anything right now. Instead, focusing on the moment definitely would.. hence her agreeing to join Acere's pack with Song at her side. In time, though - there was no real need to rush, and Song seemed to agree with that notion. "You're right. There's no rush at all," she agreed easily, letting out a slow exhale. Despite pack life not necessarily suiting her, she knew it would give her some direction, and aimlessly wandering wasn't at all ideal. Especially now, without Ignatius. "As will I - but mostly Ignatius," she said quietly, allowing a moment of reflection to grip her. Her voice was morose rather than truly pained. "I've loved him since we were children, but... the world seems to have a way of tearing us apart. Perhaps it's time I listened to it." There was much, much more to that statement, but now wasn't the time to get into it, unless Song pressed her on that topic.

She seemed to relax as her breath was exhaled and her words echoed his own. He tried to offer her a smile as they commiserate, and she told him that Ignatius was really what she was going to miss. Song gave her a sympathetic glance, ears falling to his head as he offered silent support. What could he say? Especially as she went on and he more fully realized what she had lost. He didn't know their history, but losing anyone you loved from such a young age..

”Perhaps.” he offered simply, giving her a bit of an agreeable. ”But is that what your heart wants to do?” Maybe she was only in love with the thought of Ignatius. Perhaps the image she had of him in their youth was really what she wanted, and the real Ig fit into much different standards to the one pictured in her mind.

Song hadn’t meant to intrude where he didn’t belong. ”Sorry,” he mumbled awkwardly as his cheeks grew flush. His pale fur showed the pink skin much better than dark fur. The young Destruction turned from her and towards the direction of Winterfell as he hid his blush.

Perhaps she shouldn't be so open about the pain of this fresh loss in her life. Just when she'd started to settle in to life in Fyri, things had been uprooted, and the hole in her heart where Ignatius had once been was fresh and raw. Though some of her sadness had been slightly dramatized, she wasn't lying when she said she'd loved him since she was a child... she'd never really meant to fall for him, but it had happened and there was no denying it, even now, even as angry as her feelings made her. "The heart is a fickle thing," she admitted, trying to slip back into a slightly less emotional demeanor.  "And sometimes I think it's impossible to know what it really wants. Until.. something different comes along," Kirsi explained, her words on the cusp of having some hidden implication. Before she could continue on - if she planned to at all - Song apologized, as if worried that he might've said the wrong thing.. or perhaps she had. Not one to backstep, and definitely not thinking she'd crossed a line, she quickly shook her head and moved to trail after him. "Don't apologize. You did nothing wrong," she quickly assured him, reaching out to touch her nose to his hind left flank as she caught up with him. "But enough about the past. Let's think about the future. In particular... this hunger I'm starting to feel," she cracked a grin as she gestured forward, deciding a hunt - and perhaps a talk about the future - would be a welcome distraction from this somber conversation. - exit Kirsi -