Fix me Father
07-03-2013, 10:10 PM
The boy had ran after he had ran from the scene at the battlefield. His Aunt seemed to be very angry while his Uncle seemed mutual; and the stranger oddly enough seemed nice. He remembered the look she had given him, the snarls she had emitted. What had happened to the Aunt he had met at the Seracian border not too long ago? She said that she loved him and that she would take care of him and look after him. She lied! He lashed out at the wall of the cavern he had wandered into. Pushing himself against the wall the boy let out a snarl as he threw himself against the wall once more. Maybe the physical pain would make the mental pain go away. Maybe it would ebb his sadness and give him some hope. Augustus couldn't really see for his vision was blurry from tears. His white gaze settled on the ground as he wiped his face with a paw. After blinking a few times could be focus on his surroundings. The yearling was in caverns. He had heard that his father supposedly died or either inflicted his own death in a cavern.
Anger overcame the wolf once more as he went to scratch the wall. As he did so the boy's eyes widened as he saw claw marks that have already been there. They seemed to be out if anger...sadness perhaps? Could these be his father's could this show him the pain his father had felt? The similar pain Auggie felt? Like father like son. So he scraped the wall next to the other set of marks once. Sitting back to look at it his where very similar to the other marks. Then looking down was a paw print in mud that seemed to have dried. He walked up to it and put his own paw in it...almost a perfect match other than the fact it was a but bigger than his own paw. The Bo somehow knew this was from his father...and to think he could have almost gone down the same way...no! He would not! He would live for him! Loved or not he would make it through!
His white gaze looked further down into the caverns he closed his eyes for a moment and imagined. Imagined Octavian becoming lost and breaking. Imagining inflicting wounds upon himself. Imagining...hm? There was another paw print closer to the entrance. Smaller than the other one. Almost like it would belong to a female. Loccian! His Aunt had been here! The dried mud was pushed back; she had been running. Running to him? To save him? The boy looked at it closely then looked up at the exit of the cave. He walked outside and stood in the middle of the tree-less space. He imagined a rainy evening which would have turned the dirt into mud. A pool of blood around the wolf that had been dropped into this upturning of mud and dirt. Grass faced outwards as all but bloodstained ground remained now.
Augustus lay himself down where the bloodstained ground was. Where his father had taken his last breath. When his father left his mother completely. When his father left his sister. When his father left his brother. When his father left his pack. And when his father left him...his son. A tear streamed down Auggie's face as he lay there. He looked over at the other dried mud with an indent in it where another sat, Loccian. She witnessed his final moments didn't she. But why did she seem so cruel today? Why does it seem like a shell has hardened over her heart so? The boy imagined once more as he closed his eyes.
Rain fell upon the land. A pool of blood around the two. They probably spoke their final conversation as both were probably scared. Sadness was what his Aunt probably felt. Scared was his father probably as he lay on death's doorstep. Broken was his strong heart. And broken was he by the paw of who? Who had driven him to do such a thing? Who had driven his father mad? The boy could only lay there as tears streamed down his cheek....longing for the father he never saw.
His Aunt wouldn't come for him. He knew she wouldntz she didn't love him anymore! Just like anyone else he had known! She snarled at him! Sent him away! She didn't give a piece of crap about the boy. But even if she came he would still be happy she even cared a little to come for him....but he doubted it. Maybe he would wander this area and grow up here. Or if she found him he would come back here eventually once grown and see if his law would fit his father's paw-print. Augustus felt so much pain at the moment. It was something that pierced his heart and hurt. His heart felt heavy and his spirits low. No one cared...no one loved...sometimes he wished he had never been born....
Anger overcame the wolf once more as he went to scratch the wall. As he did so the boy's eyes widened as he saw claw marks that have already been there. They seemed to be out if anger...sadness perhaps? Could these be his father's could this show him the pain his father had felt? The similar pain Auggie felt? Like father like son. So he scraped the wall next to the other set of marks once. Sitting back to look at it his where very similar to the other marks. Then looking down was a paw print in mud that seemed to have dried. He walked up to it and put his own paw in it...almost a perfect match other than the fact it was a but bigger than his own paw. The Bo somehow knew this was from his father...and to think he could have almost gone down the same way...no! He would not! He would live for him! Loved or not he would make it through!
His white gaze looked further down into the caverns he closed his eyes for a moment and imagined. Imagined Octavian becoming lost and breaking. Imagining inflicting wounds upon himself. Imagining...hm? There was another paw print closer to the entrance. Smaller than the other one. Almost like it would belong to a female. Loccian! His Aunt had been here! The dried mud was pushed back; she had been running. Running to him? To save him? The boy looked at it closely then looked up at the exit of the cave. He walked outside and stood in the middle of the tree-less space. He imagined a rainy evening which would have turned the dirt into mud. A pool of blood around the wolf that had been dropped into this upturning of mud and dirt. Grass faced outwards as all but bloodstained ground remained now.
Augustus lay himself down where the bloodstained ground was. Where his father had taken his last breath. When his father left his mother completely. When his father left his sister. When his father left his brother. When his father left his pack. And when his father left him...his son. A tear streamed down Auggie's face as he lay there. He looked over at the other dried mud with an indent in it where another sat, Loccian. She witnessed his final moments didn't she. But why did she seem so cruel today? Why does it seem like a shell has hardened over her heart so? The boy imagined once more as he closed his eyes.
Rain fell upon the land. A pool of blood around the two. They probably spoke their final conversation as both were probably scared. Sadness was what his Aunt probably felt. Scared was his father probably as he lay on death's doorstep. Broken was his strong heart. And broken was he by the paw of who? Who had driven him to do such a thing? Who had driven his father mad? The boy could only lay there as tears streamed down his cheek....longing for the father he never saw.
His Aunt wouldn't come for him. He knew she wouldntz she didn't love him anymore! Just like anyone else he had known! She snarled at him! Sent him away! She didn't give a piece of crap about the boy. But even if she came he would still be happy she even cared a little to come for him....but he doubted it. Maybe he would wander this area and grow up here. Or if she found him he would come back here eventually once grown and see if his law would fit his father's paw-print. Augustus felt so much pain at the moment. It was something that pierced his heart and hurt. His heart felt heavy and his spirits low. No one cared...no one loved...sometimes he wished he had never been born....
07-03-2013, 11:30 PM
"You are still so young..." A soft voice spoke, holding sadness and fear. Loccian moved out of the darkness, finally deciding now was a good time to show herself. The small shewolf had followed the boy, feeling bad for lashing out at him, but she did have good reason too. Her grey orbs held a deep sadness, almost making it painful to keep your gaze on her.her body was hanging as she walked a few steps over to the wall, looking at the marks her brother had made moments before he passed.
"You shouldnt have been there. Dont know the man, and you cant trust them immediately, cant feel bad to hear their story..." She lifted a paw to touch the claw marks, flinching when it made contact. Memories started to flash in her head of that day. "Sometimes you have to bare fangs to protect the ones you love..." she moved away from the marks, her gaze falling to the spot where she had found Octavian. "Even if it means they will hate you."
She was talking about when she lashed at her nephew, and him running off. She knew he would hate her for her actions, but she would not apologize.
Loccian examined her old pawprints, the day she came charging in here. "Your father, he was very intelligent. He always seemedto say what was needed to calm people.. so kind and a hard worker." She followed the pawprints but stopped a few feet from augustus. "He would be able to explain how much i truly love you..." she did not look at him once, didnt want him toseeher pain, didnt want. To see his anger.
"I am broken Augustus... i am sorry i cant show you love the correct way. The world wants me to be in pain... i will let you unleash your anger on me if that is what you wish." Her body hadbegan to tremble, gritting her teeth, fighting back the tears. "you should go to your uncle thane, maybe then you may get the love that will be properly given. I ffear i am not good enough for such a soul as yours..." a single tear ran down her cheek, feeling like a failure to this boy who needed her.
"You shouldnt have been there. Dont know the man, and you cant trust them immediately, cant feel bad to hear their story..." She lifted a paw to touch the claw marks, flinching when it made contact. Memories started to flash in her head of that day. "Sometimes you have to bare fangs to protect the ones you love..." she moved away from the marks, her gaze falling to the spot where she had found Octavian. "Even if it means they will hate you."
She was talking about when she lashed at her nephew, and him running off. She knew he would hate her for her actions, but she would not apologize.
Loccian examined her old pawprints, the day she came charging in here. "Your father, he was very intelligent. He always seemedto say what was needed to calm people.. so kind and a hard worker." She followed the pawprints but stopped a few feet from augustus. "He would be able to explain how much i truly love you..." she did not look at him once, didnt want him toseeher pain, didnt want. To see his anger.
"I am broken Augustus... i am sorry i cant show you love the correct way. The world wants me to be in pain... i will let you unleash your anger on me if that is what you wish." Her body hadbegan to tremble, gritting her teeth, fighting back the tears. "you should go to your uncle thane, maybe then you may get the love that will be properly given. I ffear i am not good enough for such a soul as yours..." a single tear ran down her cheek, feeling like a failure to this boy who needed her.
07-04-2013, 12:34 AM
Eyes closed, a small smile upon his lips...So she does have a heart after all. Let's see if she can patch things up with this kid.Eyes opened again as he frowned...he knew what this kid felt like. He was in his same exact place. Unloved, unwanted, branded as a loner who everyone hated. It was no wonder he was always so cold and unfriendly...nobody ever tried to help him. He hadn't intended to follow on purpose...after leaving the battlefield after they departed the hostile grounds, he had just wandered again. He didn't know where he was going! But alas, he had been led here without knowing. Seemed like the work of fate the more he thought about it...maybe he was meant to cross paths with the young cub. Maybe...they were meant to help each other. They were so much alike.
He stepped out of the spot within the trees where he had been standing. He heard and saw everything since the moment the young cub had arrived. And besides, if the she-wolf got mad, well tough. He was here before they had arrived, looking for the next place he'd sleep. And this time, all traces of hostility were gone. For him anyway. He stood in the center entrance to the cavern, his shadow stretching across the ground past Loccian and coming to a stop just in front of the boy. "Pardon my intrusion. But...I witnessed everything. Kid, I know how you feel. I was the same as you...I still am, as a matter of fact. In a way, you have your Aunt and your Uncle, and other family. I grew up with nobody but one friend, but she disappeared without a trace. Living a life of solitude is not what I wanted, but being solitary is all I know. I know what it's like to be alone. When I saw you earlier, sticking up for the lone wolf who knew not a kind heart, well...let me just say that nobody has ever done that for me before. Not since Ellone had disappeared all those years ago. You're a brave one, even standing against your own kin for what you truly believed in. That's pretty admirable, even if some won't admit."
He glanced at Loccian for a split second before returning his gaze to Augustus. His stance was tall but not threatening. Tail and ears raised, icy blue eyes fixated on the small figure. "Though your family may not like me due to first impressions, I'll say that you do have someone in this world who understands you. We're alike, you and I. Judgment should not be passed based on ones past. I am who I am because of that, but everyone can change. Even the most cold hearted killers will change given time, and the right influence. I, am just a loner, seeking a place I can someday call home.
He finished speaking, his words echoing throughout the caverns. He had been in this area before, he often slept nearby since it was a pretty sheltered place. He kept his gaze on the young boy, trying not to make eye contact with the she-wolf...he wasn't sure how she was or if she'd ever forgive him, but he didn't care. He had appeared for the kid.
Speech, Thought, You
He stepped out of the spot within the trees where he had been standing. He heard and saw everything since the moment the young cub had arrived. And besides, if the she-wolf got mad, well tough. He was here before they had arrived, looking for the next place he'd sleep. And this time, all traces of hostility were gone. For him anyway. He stood in the center entrance to the cavern, his shadow stretching across the ground past Loccian and coming to a stop just in front of the boy. "Pardon my intrusion. But...I witnessed everything. Kid, I know how you feel. I was the same as you...I still am, as a matter of fact. In a way, you have your Aunt and your Uncle, and other family. I grew up with nobody but one friend, but she disappeared without a trace. Living a life of solitude is not what I wanted, but being solitary is all I know. I know what it's like to be alone. When I saw you earlier, sticking up for the lone wolf who knew not a kind heart, well...let me just say that nobody has ever done that for me before. Not since Ellone had disappeared all those years ago. You're a brave one, even standing against your own kin for what you truly believed in. That's pretty admirable, even if some won't admit."
He glanced at Loccian for a split second before returning his gaze to Augustus. His stance was tall but not threatening. Tail and ears raised, icy blue eyes fixated on the small figure. "Though your family may not like me due to first impressions, I'll say that you do have someone in this world who understands you. We're alike, you and I. Judgment should not be passed based on ones past. I am who I am because of that, but everyone can change. Even the most cold hearted killers will change given time, and the right influence. I, am just a loner, seeking a place I can someday call home.
He finished speaking, his words echoing throughout the caverns. He had been in this area before, he often slept nearby since it was a pretty sheltered place. He kept his gaze on the young boy, trying not to make eye contact with the she-wolf...he wasn't sure how she was or if she'd ever forgive him, but he didn't care. He had appeared for the kid.
Speech, Thought, You
07-04-2013, 05:02 PM
(This post was last modified: 07-04-2013, 11:36 PM by Augustus.)
He lay there as his body shuddered and racked with a silent sob. The boy's eyes snapped open as he heard an all too familiar voice, Loccian. She said he was still too young....young for what? She then said he shouldn't have been there and all that. Augustus knew he shouldn't have but wanted to be with his family. He wanted to stand beside them... He turned his white gaze to his Aunt. Silently watching her flinch from touching his father's claw marks. What had she seen that day? What had she witnessed? It was all too hard to imagine. What he did imagine was probably the most he would ever be able to do. Then she spoke of him, his father, her brother. How he was kind and said the right things, even hard working. How can she say this now as he hadn't heard an ounce of these words in a while. Auggie felt as if his father had been forgotten...diminished over a few months.
Then his Aunt said if he was here he would be able to tell him how much she loved Auggie. Augustus still lay there and looked at her. He turned away. If... But the problem with that was that he was dead. He is dead! Then she said she will let him unleash his anger on her.As she stood there she said he should go to his Uncle Thane and receive the proper love there. But the boy knew his Uncle was in another pack. And he remembered she said he had cousins there. Augustus didn't want to be a burden to those in the other pack...but then again he didn't want to be a burden to his Aunt either.....that's what he classified himself as now, a burden. A burden was he to all he met and all he knew. Someone to take care of. Someone they had to talk to. Someone they had to feed. someone they had to teach. Someone they had to love. Someone they had to know...
Standing up and raising himself from the place his father died the boy silently walked over to his Aunt. She told him to unleash his anger on her if he wished...so that's what he would do. The boy came up behind her but diagonally so she wouldn't be able to see him without turning her head when he touched her. His white eyes still brimmed with tears but he kept on going closer and closer. As the yearling came right next to her he nuzzled her side and kept his head there. All Auggie wanted was love and he knew she loved him as her nephew deep down. That was what the boy unleashed onto his Aunt; instead of anger did he unleash love.
"No..." he said in so much as a whisper in the croak of his voice.
"I don't want to go to my Uncle; I'll only be a burden to them as well as I am here. But if I stay I'm still a burden to you and my Uncle. I don't know what to do. I feel empty inside. My heart hurts...you're a healer....heal it, please... I miss him; and I feel guilty that I never got to meet him. What happened here on that day? And what were his last words? I must know what his last words were....I must." he said before looking up at her.
The boy's black ears perked up as he heard another voice. the voice of the brute from the battlefield. Augustus worried that his presence would set Loccian off again. He listened to Squall say of how he was similar to him; and that Auggie was the first to stick up for him like that in a while.He then said he had someone in the world that understands him. The yearling mustered a small smile and a small nod.
"Thank you..." he said to the man before turning back to his Aunt.
"Please don't get upset...we're off the battlefield. And we're in a place that I consider to be a place to be...quiet and somber. This is where my father died. This is where your brother died. Please respect that and give him a second chance? A-and there's one more request I would like to ask of you. Can you take me to the place where he's buried later? I would like to speak with him." he said in a calm voice that still trembled.
The wolf sat there beside his Aunt; with his head still pressed against her side. He leaned further into her. She was one of the closest things to his father. Same blood, similar looks. Same parents, same scent. thinking of that he looked up at her once more and let out a small whimper. He loved her as if she was his own parent. But she wasn't classified as one to him but he loved her as one. Augustus loved his Aunt more than she thought she did. If she wasn't his Aunt he would have almost called her mother a few times. She was his only source of love at the time and he wouldn't dare try to bite the paw that gave it to him besides be a bit stubborn. But is this what the brute had come to? A leech of love? So deprived that he had to search for it? with a small sigh he looked back at the indent in the dried mud and a small shudder ran up his spine. Closing his white gaze briefly did he imagine his father sitting beside them. He imagined him looking at him and Loccian with a soft and careful gaze. A small smile would be portrayed upon his face. Maybe Loccian didn't know that her brother was still alive in a way. He was alive in her. Alive in her heart as well and her memories. He was there wherever she was. Even when she felt alone he was there right?
The only way to calm his Aunt was to know the last words his father said. He would find some meaning and tell her what he though about it. Maybe it was about her, about him, about his mother, about their parents, about the stars know what. But the boy had to know. He was so eager and his paws shuffled as he thought. Looking back at Squall with his white gaze did he offer a small smile. The brute wasn't bad once you got to know him; and Auggie wanted to be his friend. Hopefully one day...and hopefully soon or someday.
Then his Aunt said if he was here he would be able to tell him how much she loved Auggie. Augustus still lay there and looked at her. He turned away. If... But the problem with that was that he was dead. He is dead! Then she said she will let him unleash his anger on her.As she stood there she said he should go to his Uncle Thane and receive the proper love there. But the boy knew his Uncle was in another pack. And he remembered she said he had cousins there. Augustus didn't want to be a burden to those in the other pack...but then again he didn't want to be a burden to his Aunt either.....that's what he classified himself as now, a burden. A burden was he to all he met and all he knew. Someone to take care of. Someone they had to talk to. Someone they had to feed. someone they had to teach. Someone they had to love. Someone they had to know...
Standing up and raising himself from the place his father died the boy silently walked over to his Aunt. She told him to unleash his anger on her if he wished...so that's what he would do. The boy came up behind her but diagonally so she wouldn't be able to see him without turning her head when he touched her. His white eyes still brimmed with tears but he kept on going closer and closer. As the yearling came right next to her he nuzzled her side and kept his head there. All Auggie wanted was love and he knew she loved him as her nephew deep down. That was what the boy unleashed onto his Aunt; instead of anger did he unleash love.
"No..." he said in so much as a whisper in the croak of his voice.
"I don't want to go to my Uncle; I'll only be a burden to them as well as I am here. But if I stay I'm still a burden to you and my Uncle. I don't know what to do. I feel empty inside. My heart hurts...you're a healer....heal it, please... I miss him; and I feel guilty that I never got to meet him. What happened here on that day? And what were his last words? I must know what his last words were....I must." he said before looking up at her.
The boy's black ears perked up as he heard another voice. the voice of the brute from the battlefield. Augustus worried that his presence would set Loccian off again. He listened to Squall say of how he was similar to him; and that Auggie was the first to stick up for him like that in a while.He then said he had someone in the world that understands him. The yearling mustered a small smile and a small nod.
"Thank you..." he said to the man before turning back to his Aunt.
"Please don't get upset...we're off the battlefield. And we're in a place that I consider to be a place to be...quiet and somber. This is where my father died. This is where your brother died. Please respect that and give him a second chance? A-and there's one more request I would like to ask of you. Can you take me to the place where he's buried later? I would like to speak with him." he said in a calm voice that still trembled.
The wolf sat there beside his Aunt; with his head still pressed against her side. He leaned further into her. She was one of the closest things to his father. Same blood, similar looks. Same parents, same scent. thinking of that he looked up at her once more and let out a small whimper. He loved her as if she was his own parent. But she wasn't classified as one to him but he loved her as one. Augustus loved his Aunt more than she thought she did. If she wasn't his Aunt he would have almost called her mother a few times. She was his only source of love at the time and he wouldn't dare try to bite the paw that gave it to him besides be a bit stubborn. But is this what the brute had come to? A leech of love? So deprived that he had to search for it? with a small sigh he looked back at the indent in the dried mud and a small shudder ran up his spine. Closing his white gaze briefly did he imagine his father sitting beside them. He imagined him looking at him and Loccian with a soft and careful gaze. A small smile would be portrayed upon his face. Maybe Loccian didn't know that her brother was still alive in a way. He was alive in her. Alive in her heart as well and her memories. He was there wherever she was. Even when she felt alone he was there right?
The only way to calm his Aunt was to know the last words his father said. He would find some meaning and tell her what he though about it. Maybe it was about her, about him, about his mother, about their parents, about the stars know what. But the boy had to know. He was so eager and his paws shuffled as he thought. Looking back at Squall with his white gaze did he offer a small smile. The brute wasn't bad once you got to know him; and Auggie wanted to be his friend. Hopefully one day...and hopefully soon or someday.