Motif was probably out and about with their father when Poem returned to the den at midday. Her heart sunk, being alone was difficult for the young girl, with her first heat throwing her emotions out of whack it was easy for her to slip into sorrow. She wanted to see her mother, her heart felt broken and heavy and as she stared into the empty den she felt like joy would never find her again. It wasn’t Motif’s fault, she couldn’t know her sister needed her company as much as she needed Poem.

Though she knew the trip wouldn’t help Poem’s pale paws carried her to the rapids. The Destruction girl withheld her tears as she walked slowly, both of her companions missing from her side as she went. Sorrow filling her with each step until her blue and lavender eyes fell on her once home. The den that Shaye made and raised the two girls inside.

As she crossed the threshold tears filled her vibrant eyes and she submitted to her sorrow. ”Mom…” She cried heavily as she collapsed on the den’s floor. Shaye’s scent was still here, stale and dead, but a real reminder of the wolf that once was. Poem cried heavily, the weight of everything crushing her emotionally. They had much to celebrate since the victory in the raid but it all felt so pointless in those moments. ”Why did you leave me?” She whimpered softly, crawling towards on old fur that had been left behind. Shaye’s scent was heavy on it and Poem grabbed it without hesitation. She curled her body around the piece of fur and inhaled deeply. The scents returning her to a better time when she had been whole. Time was supposed to heal all wounds, but the pain was just as fresh today as when she had been told of her mother’s death.

She tried to hold it together for her sisters and for her father, and she had already been so strong for so long. The emotions seemed to cascade and waterfall on top of her until Poem felt herself drowning. This was the crash, the weakness she had fought for so long, the sadness she had warded off because she had to. Now the truth came out, she hurt and as she lay there curled around that lost piece of her mother, Poem felt herself break.

Corvus was still trying to get back to normal after the raid. His injuries hadn't exactly taken him longer to recover from - his spar with Ignis had been more of a wrestling match than a proper fight, but he knew others had suffered more than he had. He was beyond proud of how well Abaven had done, growing stronger even after all they had persevered through. Things were pretty good right now, as far as he was concerned... sometimes when he was feeling down his mind might start drifting, to his parents or even his sister, and to the other wolves Abaven had lost throughout the years, but he couldn't complain. Things could be worse - and they had been. Things had felt like they were turning a better direction, and he hoped this was a sign it would only continue.

Of course, not everyone was doing as well as him. He'd been wandering near the rapids when he heard something out of the ordinary, and his interest was piqued, moreso out of concern than anything else. Corvus wasn't really the prying type, being a fairly private wolf himself - but the noise sounded oddly like crying. He'd never been terribly good at being comforting, at least he didn't think so, but it was one of his duties to take care of his pack and he wouldn't hesitate to follow the sound. It took him to Shaye's den, a place he largely avoided now. He hadn't been as close to her as many wolves - in fact, he'd been wary of her at first - but she had helped train him to become a Blackthorn and her loss had still hurt quite a bit. Even now he stood hesitantly near the den before peeking inside, unsure if its inhabitant wanted to be disturbed.

Upon further inspection it became clear that Poem was inside, no doubt crying as he'd originally thought. "Poem?" Corvus spoke gently, sounding almost apologetic to be disturbing her. "Just making sure you're okay," he offered warily. Obviously she wasn't doing great but he still wanted to check in and make sure something serious wasn't going on.

She curled inwardly on herself, letting the tears flow freely as she didn’t expect to be disturbed here of all places. Poem tried to return to the days of her childhood, which was a lifetime ago at this point. So much had happened since she and Motif were young puppies curled up beside Epitaph or their mother here. Everything was so much more simple in those days. All she had to worry about was her nuisance of a brother. Poem yearned for those days, before the fire, before life showed her its true nature.

Her gentle sobs were interrupted by the sound of a voice at the entrance of the den. She blinked open her eyes to find Corvus standing there. Poem didn’t know him very well honestly, but he had been a constant in Abaven and her life. She suddenly felt ashamed at where he found her. Poem pulled into herself a bit more and closed her eyes again. ”I’m okay, Corvus.” She told him softly, her heart hurt and she felt herself swallowed by her sorrow. She didn’t know what else to say to him. She obviously hurt, but what was he going to do? ”I’m not really up for company…” She continued. How well had he known Shaye? Did he guess that was why she was here, that was probably obvious. ”I just miss my mom.”

Almost as soon as he spoke, he regretted making his presence known at all. Maybe checking on her wasn't such a good idea; as an individual he didn't want to bother her, but as a fellow packmate as well as family member, he knew it was his due diligence to check on her... even if he doubted he could actually help her at all. She admitted she was okay, and he nodded in understanding. "I just heard..." His voice trailed off and he decided against elaborating. "I just wanted to check on you," he explained gently.

Though she said she wasn't up for company, she went on to say she missed her mom. "I'm sorry. I can go if you want," Corvus added quickly. The last thing he wanted to do was make things worse, but at the same time he wanted her to know he understood her pain, at least some of it. "I miss my parents all the time, so I get it. And my sister - she disappeared when I was really young." That loss had hurt more than losing his parents somehow, though not because he loved them any less. They'd seen him to adulthood and ensured he had the skills to thrive when they were gone. But Rhea had disappeared far too young, when she was only a child, and even now many years later he found himself wondering what had become of her. "I guess I just... wanted you to know you're not alone in feeling like that. And I'm always here if you wanna talk about it. Or just cry, that's okay too." Corvus wasn't really the expressive type, it never came easily to him, but now as he spoke to Poem he felt tears prickling at his eyes.

Corvus was sweet to check up on her, if Poem wasn’t quite so distressed she would have appreciated the gesture so much more. Knowing she had her cousins and packmates to count on when her mother couldn’t be there for her. He offered to leave her if she really wanted him to, but Poem couldn’t bring herself to do it. Having company when she felt so low helped more than she would admit even to herself. Sorrow like this settled on her shoulders more often than she liked, and only time could heal her wounds.

She sighed softly as she opened her tears stained blue and lavender eyes to meet his forest green gaze. There was more understanding in his gaze than she had expected and as he spoke of his parents she felt their bond grow stronger. He knew what she was going through, he understood every moment of her sorrow, and knowing she wasn’t alone helped. Of course she knew that her sisters were suffering in the same way, but she couldn’t stand the thought of burdening them further. She’s already shared so much tears between them.

”Corvus…” She whispered softly, seeing the emotions that he similarly felt. Hesitating only a moment the girl picked herself up off the floor of the den and made her way to her cousin’s side. With a heavy sigh she relaxed against him. ”It’s so hard.” She pulled from his strength and accepted his support. Maybe she didn’t want company, but now that she was beside him coping was easier. She’d never stop missing her mother, but she wasn’t alone. Not with Corvus, her family, and the pack behind her. ”What did we do to deserve so much hardship?” She questioned, knowing he wouldn’t have a real answer for her.

He wasn't sure whether or not Poem would want to talk, or if she'd shut down. Hell, maybe she'd even remind him that she wasn't in the mood for company. Regardless of the outcome he felt it important to tell her that he could relate, in a way, despite the age difference between them - he knew how losing family felt, even if Shaye's death hadn't hit him personally quite as hard as it had her. Either way he was relieved when she didn't deny his company, knowing well that loneliness during a time like this would only make things harder for her. Sure, the thought of company might not be appealing, but sometimes it was necessary to be surrounded by loved ones to begin to heal, even if you didn't want it at the time.

Still... he wasn't usually overly emotional. Sometimes he struggled with stuff in his own head, but he didn't usually talk about his feelings of grief and regret in front of others, even his family. His brow furrow as he tried to hold back the tears that had suddenly started to burn at his eyes. He stood strong as Poem leaned against him, though slowly reclined himself, feeling like he might need to steady himself too. "I know it is," he agreed softly. "I hate the whole... 'I know how it feels' thing everyone likes to say... but I do know. I think about my parents and my sister all the time. Even now." Maybe they hadn't gone quite like Shaye, but he had no doubt his parents were long gone now, and his sister's fate - as uncertain as it was - wasn't too hard to guess. The thought made his heart ache, and he felt tears begin to fall down his cheeks. "I don't think we deserve it. I think it just happens. And as much as it sucks, I think we're stronger for it. Maybe that's part of why Abaven has lasted for so long." Through all the grief and strife they'd waded through, they still persevered - that was what Abaven was all about, and always had been. And though Corvus didn't always feel stronger for it, in a way he knew he was, and knew they all were.

If she couldn’t rely on her pack mates then who could she count on? Despite her sorrow Poem felt cared for and special since Corvus had come to find her, and despite her grumpy attitude he’d pushed onward to try and comfort her. She shook her head lightly to rid herself of the tears as he gave her the old trope, but he was right. She felt the comfort of knowing he had seen what she was going through, he was still struggling through those emotions. Her sadness would never leave, that much she was sure of, but they had to go on. She might not ever find comfort in her loss, but time would take care of the height of her emotions.

They would never forget the ones they lost, they would never stop wishing they were still there. But as Corvus went on Poem couldn’t disagree with him, they were stronger for the hardship. They overcame, it was what Abaven did. ”I hate it. But you’re right.” She wouldn’t deny it, and even if she wouldn’t admit the next fact it was just as true. Poem wouldn’t have come into her own nearly as quickly or as independently if Shaye was still here. She would have more fully relied on her mother, and that wouldn’t have allowed her to grow as much. Even if she would have much preferred to have her here. There was always a silver lining, even if it was painful.

Accepting that she couldn’t do anything to prevent or change what happened was one of the most difficult hurdles. ”I hope we get a chance to be happy again.” She mused quietly. They deserved a little hope and happiness, all of Abaven did.

No amount of effort trying to hold back his tears seemed to work. Had he ever just sat and cried over all of his losses, he wondered to himself? Maybe here and there, but he'd never really sat down and cried over it.... and he hadn't expected today to be that day. But all of a sudden the tears were streaming down his cheeks and he was lowering himself near Poem. In a way he'd had long since acknowledged his own personal losses, of his parents and his sister, but had he really allowed himself to stop and grieve properly? Maybe he hadn't. But now he felt a weight beginning to lift off his shoulders as he cried, quietly but obviously.

"I hate it too," he agreed somberly. It was hard - life in general could be hard, and Poem was young enough that maybe she hadn't fully understood the depth of just how much harder it could get. Hopefully not too much more difficult, but he knew that was already a possibility. "I miss Shaye, too. She was good to me. Helped me figure out what I wanted to do within Abaven, who I wanted to be." At first he'd been wary when she and Rhyme had returned. Change had seemed strange to him back then, but as he got older he began to realize that Shaye harbored the same ideals as the rest of his family. Losing her had been a loss for all of them, he had no doubt about that. "I have no doubt we'll both find happiness again. It's not easy, but it's not impossible either," he offered a little smile toward her, hoping she felt a bit better, even if she hadn't wanted his company at first. Honestly, he did... even with his cheeks damp from tears he hadn't meant to fall.

All of Abaven mourned Shaye’s loss, but Poem could tell as Corvus joined in her tears that her mother was not who they were for. She had to admit she didn’t really remember her cousin’s parents, and she wasn’t sure when he had lost them or what happened to them. Likely no one did. Poem wasn’t sure what was worse, burying her mother or not knowing what happened. As she agreed with him, he agreed to her and echoed his distaste before reminiscing further about Shaye.

”She really loved Abaven, she lived for us.” Not just herself and her sister but the whole pack. She gave all of herself for them. Corvus offered up some encouraging words, maybe happiness would take some work but they would attain it once more someday. She sniffled lightly and tried to mirror his small smile. Maybe she wasn’t there yet, but they were on the path to recovery. There was hope. Maybe this feeling of loss would never leave, but there would also be happiness again. ”Maybe not impossible.” She agreed before taking in a steadying breath and rubbing the damp tears from her cheeks.

Hopefully the fact that Corvus understood her suffering, at least to some extent, was a comfort to her. Suffering was never fun in itself but somehow it felt lessened when it was shared with those around you... at least that was how Corvus felt. He hadn't even expected to start crying when he'd relayed his own losses to her, but now that he was he felt less foolish than he'd thought. Sure, he'd mourned them in a way, but it felt good to let out some of his pain again in the company of of a packmate and a family member.

"She did," he agreed with another smile, through the tears. Shaye had helped him a lot, even if they hadn't been as close as he wished they had been. "Thanks for talking to me, Poem. I'll come check in on you again later, alright?" He knew she had wanted some alone time, and while she had opened up to his company he felt she might need time to grieve in private too, as she had been before he'd found it. Maybe part of him wanted some time of his own time too. He offered her another gentle, encouraging smile as he bid her farewell.

- exit Corvus -