Indigo looked out over Auster from the crumbling wall around the castle, the wind was more fierce up here. It lashed at his thick fur and the mane that was very nearly fully grown in. He resembled a lion more and more each day, or more accurately, one of those sabered cats. Indigo was very nearly a full adult, and that fact couldn’t be stated better than in the way he was filling out. Indy had always been big and beefy but there was something different now, his chest was full and his legs were supple. His mane was nearly full and was growing up his chin and down his belly.

He reached his full adult potential physically but Indigo still felt like he was trailing behind mentally. The yearling didn’t feel at all like an adult, or like a man despite his appearance. He struggled with his thoughts all through that morning until he finally drove himself to meet with his grandmother. Massive paws carried him to the western part of the castle where Resin and her immediate family lived. The boy lingered there at the threshold, pacing slightly as he forced his mind to put together words that didn’t want to come.

The Aegis of The Hallows had been feeling under the weather. As such, she had been keeping to herself in the wing of the castle that she had chosen for her family. The woman hadn't been out to patrol in a few days, thinking that maybe her body and mind needed some rest. Perhaps she would be back to normal after she slept, ate and slept some more. The events of late had been confusing, disturbing. She had called Artorias Oxx. She had tried to attack him during the battle with the cats. While meeting Duchess, Resin had forgotten Indigo's face for a moment. It was... frightening. And the headaches...

Heavy paws outside of her door brought the fae's head up from where it rested on a pile of furs before the fire. Though the room was warm, she had the balcony doors open as well and snowflakes fluttered into the space. A small drift had formed, stretching into the room. She didn't care. Being stuck in the castle was stifling and she needed some fresh air.

The scent of Indigo was pulled into the room as the winter wind sucked at the door. "Indigo," she rumbled, letting him know that she was aware of his presence.

He continued to pace, uncertain of his next move or even if he wanted to speak to Resin yet or not. He felt so conflicted deep down, uncertain of his future or even what to expect from his life. Massive paws shuffled against the stone and his claws clicked as he turned. He might have continued to pace there for the rest of the day when he heard Resin’s voice on the other side of the door. His name on her lips.

Indy lowered his head shamefully and grit his teeth at his indecisiveness. Still, the boy lifted himself to his full height and pushed into the room beyond. The fire was pleasant but the wind created a cold gust within the private quarters. ”Resin.” He greeted softly with a low dip of his head. ”Could I… could we talk?” He still had no idea what he wanted to say or even what he was looking for, but here he was. No use wasting Resin’s time.

It took him a moment, but the boy finally entered the room. Not much of a boy anymore, actually. He had filled out and was very much a young man now. He was troubled though. Always had been. Resin hoped that he would grow to control his emotions while within The Hallows. From her perspective, he'd gotten better, but he wasn't there yet.

The purple boy asked if they could talk and Resin nodded, huffing lightly. "I always have time for you, Indigo. What's on your mind?" Her head didn't hurt at the moment and she felt okay. It would be nice to have some company for a little while and if she could help her grandson, all the better.

Resin motioned to the large pile of furs near the fire offering him a seat. "If it's too cold for you, you can shut the door." A whistling wind pushed into the room, sending even more snowflakes flying towards the pair of canines.

Indigo looked much more like a man than he felt, his huge form was filling out nicely. He was a massive beast, his mane was growing in and his muscles had filled out well with the training and patrolling he did. Huge paws carried him into the room and towards the furs that Resin gestured to him. She told him that she had plenty of time for him as well, which relieved him slightly. He sighed softly as his blue eyes shifted to the fire that kept the chill of the wind from being overly harsh. With his thick fur it took a lot for the cold to truly effect him. Indy shook his head as Resin told him that he could close the door. The fresh air was nice.

”There’s always so much on my mind, It’s hard to even narrow down my thoughts sometimes.” He confessed, still not quite returning his gaze to her one fiery eye. ”There is one that keeps returning. I.. feel like my place isn’t here, Resin. I don’t think I belong in the Armada either.” He told her softly, finally bringing his blue gaze to her. ”I couldn’t being to say where it actually might be but.. I wish to take on more responsibility and…” He pulled in his breath, saying the words for the very first time made them much more real and concrete. ”If you are willing to teach me, I’d like to know more about leadership.”

Indigo settled down on the furs across from her, turning down the offer to close the door against the clinging cold of winter. Dark ears perked as the boy began to speak. No matter how close to being a young man he was, to Resin, he would always be a boy. Just like his siblings would always be seen as children.

The purple brute began by confessing that his thoughts often ran rampant. It seemed to trouble him that his thoughts had a mind of their own. "The older you get, the easier it is to sort through your thoughts, though I still have times when they seem to be out of control." She sought to ease whatever worry the situation may have brought to him.

When he continued, she wasn't surprised to hear that he didn't think his place was in The Hallows. He'd been disconnected from the moment that he'd joined the pack. The one-eyed woman merely nodded. She was surprised when he asked her to teach him about leadership, however. It was the first time that he'd shown such interest. He'd taken the initiative and asked her and there was no way that she would turn him down. After a moment of silence, the maned woman nodded. "As you wish."

Indigo confessed his shortcomings to a wolf he fully considered his grandmother. She had been there nearly his whole life and even if it wasn’t her in his memories it was his aunt Iolaire. As much as his parents raised him he felt like those two wolves were quintessential to his upbringing. Indigo still felt like he hadn’t figured anything out, that even now as he was approaching his second birthday he was a child. Resin offered him a glimpse at the solution to his problems, though Indigo was hardly satisfied with it. Age would help, but even then he would probably struggle throughout his life. Indy looked away as he contemplated the answer and in that moment he realized a lot of things.

There would be no great moment where he suddenly ‘got’ what life had to offer. There was no magic insight that would lift the fog and show him a clear path. The adults in his life didn’t know everything nor did they have it all figured out. They were just going through with the motions and doing whatever they thought was best. Those particular thoughts would take much more contemplation than the moment provided, and he wouldn’t keep his bright blue gaze off Resin for very long.

She agreed to train him further after acknowledging exactly how he felt about the Hallows. He’d made a place here, but he didn’t feel like he truly belonged. ”Thank you,” he added as he struggled with his own uncertainty. He knew where his weaknesses lay, despite his physical strength when it came to mental strength he was much weaker. He needed to work harder on his mask and push his insecurities further and further down.

Part of her didn't want Indigo to lose the carefree child that he was, but the realistic part of her knew that he needed to. If he was going to survive in the world, he needed to harden himself. He needed to learn and grow. Especially if he was going to keep taking lost birds under his wing. Cosette and now Duchess... He'd had Rue before. It seemed that Indigo was destined to be a collector of fragile and broken things.

The boy thanked her and Resin nodded. "Of course," she rumbled. She cared for the boy and wanted nothing more than to see him succeed in life. He was as large as his father and she knew that he could fight. Physical prowess wasn't the problem. He was too emotional and he warred with himself internally. That would eventually tear him apart if he didn't learn to control those emotions.

"A large part of leadership is finding balance. The balance between being rough and being soft. Being a tyrant and being a pushover. In order to do this, you need to find balance within yourself. You need to be able to control the emotions that would otherwise rule you." The woman gave her head a light shake. "All of it comes with practice."