He had spent the last couple of weeks hunting like crazy, stocking up a portion of their den he had built for storage with cured and dried meats of all sorts, willing away his own guilt in the process. Somehow he had justified to himself that if he just stocked up on enough food to hold his children over through the rest of summer and possibly into fall then he could allow himself the escape he was working himself toward. He was sure they wouldn't think anything of it - he had always been over prepared when it came to food and supplies. He skinned them fresh pelts for their beds, stocked their food supply, made a stash of basic, useful herbs, crafted several sets of tools that he tended to use when he skinned and prepared his kills to leave behind for them. His heart and soul were hollow and shattered, there was nothing left of himself to give to them.

It was the middle of the night, a clear night where the moon would allow him plenty of light to see by. His preparations were done. There was nothing else he could do to prepare them for this. He had given them what life he felt like he had left and that was all he could do. He hoped and prayed that he had done enough to teach them and train them for their lives. He hoped they would lean on one another and help one another without him. He had done all that he could on his own, without their mother's help. And now she was gone, any last remaining shred of his hope gone with her. He waited till he was fairly certain that the kids were fast asleep in their separate alcoves that he had taken the time to build and prepare for them after he returned from trying to bring Aranea home. He slipped quietly out of the den with a bag of travel supplies he had prepared, pausing as he looked back at the entrance of the den, his emotions threatening to strangle him, before he pushed himself forward toward the border of the pack.

Walk | "Talk" | think

Balthier still tried to spend many nights with Azzurra, but there were nights that he stayed in his own room he helped make with his father. He thought that Azzurra getting some independence would be good for her, at least inside where she was safe. He felt a little differently outside. Well, actually, he felt a little differently all together but he knew he had to be willing to bend.

He didn't hear his father leaving the den, but he was stirred as he heard the pack fall onto his body. At first he didn't do anything, almost went back to sleep. He was almost going down back into his blank dreams. But the sound of the shuffling bag from moments ago had echoed back into his mind and he shot up from the noise that was no longer there.

He took another moment to get up from his room in the den, and he immediately looked around from the main area into all of his family sleeping inside. He moved over to his father's area, ready to wake him from the noise he heard, but he was surprised when he wasn't there. He didn't understand what Allegro was doing, and almost just went back to bed. But instead he left the den and when he realized his father's scent leaving Abaven, he followed. It wasn't really normal for him to leave so late in the middle of the night. It wasn't like when he went to go see Aranea and found out she abandoned them. He tried to catch up to him, but didn't make his presence outwardly known when he did.

"Balthier"

Allegro steadily made his way toward the border, guilt building in his chest, but even that guilt was twisted by a sickening sense of relief. More and more he had felt a painful resentment in his chest when he looked at Azzurra and that wasn't fair to his daughter. It wasn't her fault she had taken more after her mother than her others. It wasn't her fault that she had been so sick and so heavily dependent on him for most of her life. It wasn't her fault that every time he looked at her now he thought of Aranea and all he could feel was the betrayal and the heartache that she had caused. None of that was her fault but he also couldn't stop himself from feeling that way either.

He hesitated as he reached the border, slowing to a stop as he looked down at the ground in front of his paws, thinking of Balthier, Solo, Psalm. He loved his children. He really did. He loved them more than anything else in this world. But he couldn't force himself to stay for their sake. He was hopeful that he had done enough to prepare them for this world, but he honestly wasn't sure if anyone was ever prepared for how cruel and unfair this world was. Aranea was gone. Not just from his life or their lives but truly gone. Taken form this world by a force he couldn't control. As much as he tried to say that he was done with her, that he no longer cared, he did. He had loved her. And now she was gone, killed by the children he had cursed her for. He felt deeply guilty for how he had reacted and now he couldn't take it back.

He grit his teeth and forced himself forward, crossing the border and walking out into the world beyond. Not even two steps past the edge of Abaven's claimed lands, he heard a noise behind him and he stopped, looking back over his shoulder till his blue gaze landed on Balthier. His boy. His pride and joy. His ears fell back against his head, but he tried to force a smile onto his lips as he turned to face him, saying, "Balthier? What are you doing up? You should be asleep."

Walk | "Talk" | think

He sensed as he father was off, not quite himself. Though there were times recently that he had noticed him the same way. Maybe it was the abandonment from Aranea, maybe Balthier wasn't picking up enough of the slack. He could never know for sure, all he knew was that Allegro had always tried his best raising him and his siblings, and he was extremely grateful for the father he had and through Balthier's eyes, he was the best father anyone could have. There were many broken families inside Abaven, but they all seemed to come together as one. Though Baltheir didn't quite feel that way, he saw the rest of them. He didn't feel right inside Abaven, but it was where he was born, it was where his father raised him, and his entire life was made here.

Allegro had noted that Balthier should have been sleeping and the boy's eyes flicked along his head as his father ears pulled back and he pulled that fake smile. He didn't really understand what his father was doing, only a slight confusion across his features. "You should be too." He stated back kindly, "I heard a noise, it bothered me and I noticed you weren't in your den." Simple explanation, and maybe he was much more like Allegro than came to the eye. "Are you... going somewhere?" He quickly glanced at the pack his father had taken for the travel, and it was when his mind really started to wander. Why would he be leaving without announcing his absence? It was incredibly odd and started to unsettle Balthier. But he had no idea what to expect from his father in answer. The truth or a lie, he wouldn't know anything until or if his father told him.

"Balthier"

Allegro smirked a little when Balthier pointed out that he should be asleep too. He supposed that was a fair point. He had just hoped that he might be able to slip away in the darkness without having to admit his weakness to his children, but life decided that was not in the cards for him. Just like anything else, it found a way to not go as he had planned. His son asked if he was going somewhere and he glanced at the bad that his boy had glanced at, the damning evidence that made it hard to lie. He couldn't say he was just out for a walk. Why would he pack a bag for that? He couldn't say he was going for a hunt, it was the middle of the night. He sighed, his forced smile falling away. He didn't have much of a choice at this point and he hated that he was going to have to witness whatever reaction his son had to the news.

"Yes... I am," he admitted after a moment. He was disgusted with himself for what he planned to do and guilt twisted in his gut as he stood in front of Balthier, but the thought of staying one more day hurt even more. Staying here where he had loved Aranea, where he had raised these children on his own, where he would have to continue looking them in the eye and trying to hide the pain he felt day in and day out... He couldn't do it any more. "I'm going to live with my mother's family. They're a long way from here. I'm... I'm not planning on coming back." He let that sink in, barely able to make himself look Balthier in the eye as he said it.

"I stocked the den with meats. I made several sets of the skinning tools I taught you to use so you'll have them. You're almost a year old now... You'll be okay." All the things he had told himself to convince himself that this was okay. That he was allowed to live his own life again. He looked at the ground, nearly sick to his stomach with guilt. "I'm sorry, Balthier. I am. And I love you, I just... I can't. I'm sorry." He forced himself to turn away then, walking off into the darkness. If Balthier said anything else he didn't hear it. Everything around him drowned out into a haze as he blinked away tears and put himself on a path out of Boreas to find his long lost family again, seeking the salvation from this life that had fallen apart around him.

Walk | "Talk" | think

Balthier held his breath as his father let out a truth he wasn't expecting. Not because he wanted to say something bad about his father leaving them, but because the realization that he would no longer have his father in his life was hitting him like a wave. The idea of Allegro leaving them, abandoning them almost as Aranea did, it wasn't a thought that settled well with him.

And at that point he was nearly holding his tongue not to interrupt his father. Though, the kind of hurt feelings and even rejection that he was feeling wouldn't come through if he was able to get the words out. He opened his mouth a couple times to speak, but left the words silent as his father went on.

"It's okay." He spoke quietly, his gaze pulling from the ground. But he didn't get the chance to say anything back to him, Allegro turned off and left in a hurry, almost like leaving was as harsh a feeling for himself as it was for Balthier. At least, that's how the boy saw it and hoped his father felt.

And he supposed now it was his job to take care of his siblings from now on.

"Balthier"