Fatalis

I hear the wind across the plain a sound so strong that calls my name

The pair walked in silence to the borders of the Armada. The Warlord alternated between the joy of bringing home his wife - and the thought of their children seeing their mother alive - to the very real fear he had for Deathbelle. In the end, this day had to be for Zee. battered as she was, he could sense her growing need to be home, to see her babies.

They picked up the pace the closer they got to the Armada, Sirius responding to Zee’s unintentional ques. Faster, faster, and then it was before them. Home.

They hit the border, and Sirius kept going, glancing back to make sure she didn’t hesitate at the crossing. This was her home, and the borders would never be a barrier for her.
As they made their way inside the Armada, he tipped back his head, and let out a deep, bellowing howl. A call,  a summons. Bringing home their family, all of them.

"Ice" & "Fire"

The closer to the Armada they became, the higher Zee's heart seemed to leap into her throat. Her nerves felt ablaze, her muscles coiled and trembling. Her body warring with both the overwhelming excitement and deep rooted fear. They were her children, it was ridiculous to worry about their rejection except.. she was coming to them a literal ghost, and who knew how they'd react. She reminded herself to stay patient, to hide her tears should they be suspicious or find their anger misdirected towards her. While her relationship with Sirius was currently a little cold, she found herself pressing into his fur anyways. Hiding what of her body she could. "I'm scared." She admitted, to him alone. "Stay with me." When he tipped his head back to summon their family, she resisted the urge to join in his call. "Speech"

Ari was sprawled messily in her den, not doing a whole lot of anything. It was her rest day that Tansy always insisted she take in pack lands before heading iut again, but there wasn't anything she particularly wanted to do here. She wouldn't beg Asla for fight training and there wasn't a trained healer except Gossamer and their schedules never seemed to line up so Ari had stopped putting in the effort to look for her sister and suspected Goss had done the same. Gloom had settled over the pack lands as far as Ari was concerned. Felt like a cage these days, when all she wanted was to be out looking for her mom. Restless energy twitched her limbs and she nearly popped to her feet to just take a stroll towards the border. You know, just to... take a look around? But Tansy's grouch cat face popped up from her tail to frown at Ari and it was easier to not bother making Tansy upset when the gloom was dragging her down into lethargy again anyway. She sighed and flopped over on her other side instead.

A sound drew her attention and habit more than anything had her trudging out to see what was going on this time. More fake bodies? Maybe pretend Gossamer this time? Not having any real concept yet of how people could delude themselves into believing things that weren't true, she could only assume that he was lying to them on purpose and she couldn't fathom why when she'd loved him so much yet he'd do that to her, the feelings of deep betrayal it engendered in her, the hurt, so it was difficult to muster the enthusiasm to answer the call. Yet she did, because there was always hope, even if you were a hurt, rebellious teen girl.

Until first a familiar scent had her lifting her head with a frown, then her eyes widening as the small form came into view. "MOM!" The shriek of joy tore free after a moment of stunned disbelief. After months of insisting that Zee wasn't dead, it was almost unbelievable that she stood there, large as life. A cloud of dirt ripped free of the ground beneath her paws as she threw herself in ecstatic joy at her mother with the full intention of slamming into her chest, wanting to wrap her small arms around her mother's neck to cling with paws and claws and tears to the mother she had spent so long looking for.

Gossamer was taking her warrior training seriously. She set herself a schedule of patrols and was doing her best to stick to them, even if they were at the crack of dawn. She had yet to master the art of getting her but out of a nice warm den and into the cool of morning but she was sure it would come with practice.

Gossamer was working her way around the border of the Tall Grass Plains when she heard her father calling for the family. She picked up her pace, breaking out into a run as the call was on the other side from where she was. Well… she wanted to get back into shape.

Her pace slowed as she caught sight of her father and Aris and…

Gossamer came to a sudden stop, just staring at Zee. She swiftly raised a paw and wiped at her eyes, wondering if she was hallucinating from lack of sleep. When she removed her paw her mother was still there and the blessed wind brought the scent right to her. Tears welled up in her eyes and she screamed in joy as she rocketed toward Zee. "Mooooom! I knew it! I knew it! Mom!" She wanted to tackle her mother in a bear hug, seeking to lick at the woman's muzzle as she when a pup and nuzzle her neck. She wanted cuddles. She wanted to feel the solidity of her mother and know she was truly there and not some phantom. Her emotions ricocheted about in her head until an ugly sob erupted from her throat and tears fell in swift rivulets. "I'm sorry… oh mom I'm so sorry! I failed you! Please, I'm so sorry!" Here mother was alive, and she'd failed to find her. Zee could've been back sooner if only she'd persevered more.

Briar had quickly grown used to the routine of living with Artorias in the time that he had spent in the Armada so far. It was similar to to the routine they had fallen into together during the time she was living in The Hallows after her father accidentally attacked her. She woke up early to patrol the border with him, they spent part of the day training, and more and more learning how to fit together as a pair. She didn't feel that nervous, giddy energy around him as much any more, but what she did feel was far better than that. He made her feel calm and boosted her confidence just with his presence, making her feel like the wolf she had always wanted to be. She could ignore the rest of her life crumbling around her as long as she had Artorias to focus on and bring her joy.

She was with him when she heard her father call for their family, pausing in the middle of what she was doing to listen. He hadn't called them all together like this since... A little frown tugged at her lips, but she gave Artorias a kiss and told him that she would be right back before turning and trotting off across the plains to find her father, Marigold at her heels and Willow taking off from a nearby tree to follow overhead. She tried to keep her nerves at bay as she walked, her mind jumping to all sorts of worries and conclusions. The only possibility that never entered her mind as the approached the group formed by her father and two of her sisters was the one that was staring her in the face as she peeked past Gossamer to see who they were crowding around. Her turquoise eyes landed on the woman that she resembled most, the woman that her middle name came from, the woman that she had thought was dead.

Briar stood there for a long moment in disbelief, several feet away from the others, her mind reeling as she watched with wide eyes as Gossamer and Aris threw themselves all over their mother, crying and sobbing, ecstatic to see that their mother had returned. Briar hadn't been like them when she had heard that Zee was dead. She had accepted it as fact so that she could try to move on and so that she could focus on other things like comforting their broken father or helping Artorias as he lost his mother. She focused on herself so that she could grow and improve herself instead of wallowing in grief. Now she felt like she was staring at a ghost and she didn't know how to feel. She knew she should feel happy or relieved, but she was just confused and conflicted. She had felt the same at Zee's apparently fake funeral. Maybe she would have felt differently if she had real memories with her mother to reminisce on, but had she ever been given time alone with her mother during her childhood? Had they ever done anything together? If they had she couldn't remember it, not the way that she could remember going on patrols in the snow with her father or him taking her hunting, or confiding in him about how Artorias acted around her.

She forced herself forward after a few moments, pulling a smile onto her lips as she reached around Gossamer to nuzzle and kiss her mother's cheek, her tail wagging gently behind her. She supposed if nothing else she could be happy for her father. He had been broken to pieces in her absence, broken enough to leave these scars on her neck, so perhaps now that she was back he would be able to find his calm again. Of course she had no idea about the turmoil he was feeling, but she tried to find a positive to focus on so that she could be happy about her mother's sudden appearance while she waited for an explanation about where she had been all of this time. She backed up a bit, certain that their other siblings would appear soon enough and would want to greet their mother as well.

"Briar Fatalis"

Ophie was just...around. Existing, treading water with her head barely afloat. It was fine, Ophie felt too guilty to ask for more. She was alive and had plenty of food in her belly, too much some might argue, which was far more than be said for some. Speaking to her sisters the other day had helped a little, filled in the void with scoops of sand and flattened out with a few reassuring pats. There was a lot for her to be grateful for, so much so that she knew she shouldn't cling on so tightly to the past but it was her safety blanket. What stopped her from crying herself to sleep every night, from forgetting what should have been.

Her ears tipped forward when she heard the call, hidden amongst the grass with dried strands sticking out of her mud-caked coat. It wasn't often that her Father called everyone together, least of all that Ophie actually considered heeding the call. She knew it was terrible, that she ought to try to be more involved, to be a present member of the family but-ugh. Doubts and reservations riddled her like weeds. It wasn't that she didn't care but at the same time there was a sour feeling of not wanting to get better, as if she didn't deserve to improve. Like ultimately this was her lot in life, take it or leave it.

She drudged along, moving to the meeting spot with a drag in her steps. There was no doubt some news afoot, big and important but Ophie found it hard to work up any sense of interest or curiosity. Being the forth on the scene, she supposed it was better to be late than not turn up at all. She sunk down onto her haunches, her legs already aching a little from the journey. It was silly to say since her state was self-inflicted and all, but she missed the days when she'd race up and down the beach. Flinging bits of seaweed about, only to wear them like makeshift wigs.

Instead, she was met with the sight of her mother. Skinny and frail, her gaze glassy with things better left unseen but very much alive. Not torn apart or burned to a crisp.

"Oh." Was all she said. Statue still, in a state of shock.

Her stomach churned and tears began to prick at her eyes. This was good, wonderfully precious good news, so why did she feel so shaken?

Kotori had given up on being a healer and this last season had started attempting to learn how to hunt.  It was one thing to catch a rabbit but the last deer he had tried to catch had escaped which was pretty irritating.  He had been sitting on a patch of dry ground slighty outside the pack’s border watching a few deer grazing.  Kotori entertained the idea of going for the larger doe but even as he did he heard dad’s call.

The deer and Kotori turned their heads and when the deer realized Kotori was there they fled.  Well, so much for hunting.  The last time dad had come home and called for the family had been to announce the death of mom and Az.  So was there to be more horrible news or could it be something good?  No, if it had been he would of heard it in the howl.  Kotori sometimes liked surprises but right now he didn’t feel the enjoyment of suspense.

Kotori loped back to the packland, slowing his gait as he spotted the family and, more of the family than he expected.  Like a ghost risen from the grave there was his mom.  The same mom that had been burned to ash, right?  Kotori had never understood how to feel about her death.  It had been strange in a way and he had tried to quickly push past and it and not look back.  


So after getting past her death she was now alive.   It was her but, not her.  She looked frailer and the confidence he had once imagined her to have seemed gone.  The boy approached looking at the variety of emotions of all around before finally looking his mom in the face.  Mother and stranger all in one somehow.  

Kotori moved along side where Briar was, the two horned kids together, giving his mom a lick to the cheek as well and wag of his tail. "Welcome home mom," the boy offered softly.  Kotori was glad she was alive but watching Gossy and Aris he wondered about their extreme reactions versus his own mind.  Was it just a girl thing maybe?  Briar was just an exception.  Briar generally was the favorite of his sisters anyway.

Kotori Fatalis

 

The winged heir was running patrols. His father had vanished without a word, which wasn’t… entirely uncommon of him. He liked to take charge of everything, be everywhere at once. Did his father forget that others had to pick up the pieces when he did so? But Mortis simply got up and ran the patrols. He would need to do some hunting as well, they seemed to be going through their food pretty quick. His thoughts derailed as his father called for the family. His heart sank, a meeting, now? What could it mean. He stopped what he was doing, and raced in the direction of the call. He arrived to find a pile of his younger siblings collected together. At first, it struck him of the difference, the change in his life. It wasn’t Asla, Indigo, and Azure waiting there for him. In fact, there was none of the first litter but him. His heart… hurt. In the next moment, he realised who they were mobbing. He gasped in shock, his wings dropping hard to the ground as his muscles stopped holding them up. No. No. How could he believe this? This was a lie. His father had… had done something. He couldn’t think, he couldn’t bear to get hurt again. He stepped slowly closer, as through in a dream. He caught her scent in the air. It was different, and there was - almost poetically - the scent of ash in her fur. But it was her. “Mum?” he said softly, and then he was moving forward, leaning over the smaller wolves as he spread out his wings and enveloped everyone beneath him. Holding them all together, holding them to Zee. tears leaked down his dark face as he leaned forward to press his head against that of Zees. closing his eyes, and holding his forehead to her. She was so small these days, he had to lean down so far to do it. He continued to shed silent tears. “....How.” "Speech"

Zee asked for his comfort, but ultimately the Warlord knew she would be alright. He squeezed her paw and stepped back as the kids started to appear. Giving space for them to approach and cuddle her. Aris first, and then Gossy. Briar appeared as a more hesitant figure, and the Warlord began to move around the outskirts, heading towards the horned child.

He bumped gently against her. He had seen more of Briar than his other kids lately. She was a steady, constant presence in his life. His lifeline. The confusion in her eyes hurt, but he understood. Zee back from the dead… it had hurt as much as it had joyed him. A painful twining of the two. Bitter and sweet. He would not show that part to the children. They needed stability, they needed to see that things would be okay. He lowered his head down to whisper softly in Briar’s ear “I know.” he said simply, pulling her towards him. It would be a lie if he didn’t admit at least to himself that he needed a little support himself. The ground seemed shaky beneath him, constants in life were suddenly interchangeable.
“I know. But they couldn't let the shadows of these last few months hold them. Couldn't let them overwrite the good times. Of kissing scraped knees and holding them close. Zee had always cherished her children, while Sirius had been the stern defender and teacher, she had been the open arms.

“I know it’s scary, but a chance to see again those that we believed lost to us? you've been given a gift. Your mother went through hell. I won’t tell you all of it now, but she went through hell for the chance to see you again. To see how you’ve grown, and kiss your bruised knees. Go, hug her, and we can figure out the rest later.” He kissed her crown and gave her a soft nudge, before moving to the other hesitant face.

Ophelia. Where had she been hiding? He felt he had barely seen her, and… that round belly defied the training he had first put his children through. It was secondary to everything else going on right now, it was secondary to her being okay. He reached her and tugged gently at Oph’s ear. “Your mother will never admit to it, but she loves stinky hugs the most” he whispered, referring to the way the girl had always hated a bath. He smiled at her in support, “We need to talk Oph, I’m here for you, okay?” too much change in the girls life, the stressing eating proved that. A part of him wanted to berate her - over using resources, putting herself into a position where she would not be able to defend her home… but no. No, he could not let that side rise in him. He settled for kissing her crown as well, and giving her an encouraging nudge forward.

The second to last of them to arrive, Kotori needed no such encouragement. He went straight to their mother, although his response was a lot more contained then Gossy and Aris. Returning to the hugging family, he grinned, and ruffled Ko’s ears. “I know.” he said simply. And then Mortis was there, completing the circle of who he knew would come. Some part of him still glanced up - looking to see Azure, of Indigo, or Asla. a silent plea that would go unanswered. Then his vision was shrouded by dark velvet feathers as Mortis wrapped his wings about all of them, and held them close. The Warlord stood at the fringes of those wings hold. His larger frame harder to shelter. That was okay. Together, Father and heir linked those broken pieces of their lives. Zee was here, and she had her babies in her arms again.

"Speech"

She stood there and absorbed her husbands’ relentless strength, wishing she could have half the confidence he did that the day would go well. He pulled away from her and Zee was forced to steel herself so the panic in her eyes would not show. The first of her children to arrive was the smallest of the second litter, and as Aris threw herself into Zee’s neck she let go of the breath she’d been holding - nearly winded by the shock of the small girl’s love. “I missed you, too.” She breathed. Her paw lifted and wrapped around her makeshift scarf, her head dipping to press nose into Ari’s neck. The scent of her daughter was familiar and grounding, and only when the next child arrived did she bring herself to come up from the fur for air. Gossamer was equally enthusiastic and a surge of panic came over her as the monochromatic child barreled forth. Swiftly she readjusted her angle, pulling Ari’s hanging form off to the side with her arm so she would not absorb the tackle of a bear hug that followed. “Oh, Goss.” The girl licked at her muzzle and Zee’s eyes briefly pulled skyward in a futile attempt to hold back her own tears. “You have nothing to apologize for. You could never fail me.” A pause, as Zee sucked in a shaky breath and ultimately deflected. “Oh, look how much you’ve both grown.” Her voice cracked, and she lifted her free leg to wrap around Goss’ shoulder - trusting the large girls weight to support both hers and Ari’s through the embrace. Zee knew she was small and did not have much space to offer in the way of a family cuddle - especially not to a family of direwolf children - but as Briar appeared she was determined to find every inch of room. She looked pass Gossamer towards her horned look-alike of a daughter, feeling her hesitance as clearly as she might a knife. Without thinking she squeezed Ari tighter, and leaned the side of her head into Goss. If she could draw strength from their enthusiasm, perhaps she could make it through this reunion. “Your horns,” Zee started, watching as Briar took her time approaching and placed upon her cheek a nuzzle and a kiss. While it felt like an action born out of obligation, Zee leaned in to return it regardless. She’d missed them too much to resist touching her face to their fur or inhaling their scent. “They’ve grown beautifully. What a remarkable young woman you’re becoming.” She was at a loss for words, unsure how to react in the face of the yearling’s neutrality. She felt like she should apologize, but there was so much to apologize for that finding one blanket statement felt impossible. I'm sorry your father hurt you, It's all my fault? Not likely, at least not in this moment. Zee didn’t have long to feel the awkwardness of Briar’s entrance before she’d backed away again, taking a small part of Zee’s heart with her. She did not miss the way Sirius placed himself near to Briar, whispering in her ear. Don’t force them. She wanted to tell him - but the hesitance had hurt, and if Sirius could help them to reconnect again then it was something Zee did not want to discourage. Ophelia showed herself next and Zee waited, anxious for the very-round yearling to make her decision. Still grasping tightly to Ari and Goss, and praying that her eyes did not express to the yearling how desperately she wanted her to approach. Like with Briar she struggled for words - only with Ophie it was harder because she couldn’t say the first thing that came to her mind. The girl needed.. well, a bath, for one thing. But somehow Zee doubted the shellshocked yearling would quietly accept her threatening to tow her into the ocean today. She offered her a hopeful smile, but then dropped her gaze from her silent daughter. They’ll need space - and that's okay. She tried to remind herself, again and again. Kotori was the last of the youngest group, and the only boy in the sea of girls. Zee gave him a small smile, hoping to see the expression reflected on his own lips.. Though he, too, appeared to fall somewhere along the spectrum of hesitance. She swallowed, and tilted her head up to accept his gentle lick of her cheek. “Thank you, son.” Was all she could manage in reply. Out of some streak of luck his tail did manage to slowly wag, and she watched the movement and told herself it was proof he might be happy to see her returned. For a brief moment Zee watched her five children and felt the absence of the eldest litter. Indy perhaps was still with the Hallows, but where was Asla and the grandchildren she’d been told about? She didn’t have long to miss them before her winged son made his entrance, and Zee’s heart skipped a hopeful beat. Mortis had always been soft, empathetic, and too open-hearted. Looking at him it was hard to fear he’d judge her, reject her, or turn her away.. Though a lot could change in almost a year. He stepped slowly towards her and Zee found she was once more holding her breath. Clinging tightly to the forms of Ari and Goss, it wasn’t until his wings enveloped them that she allowed her body to relax. A part of her knew that this was it - Asla and Indy had drifted away, they’d begun distancing themselves from her long before she’d been captured. Azure was presumed dead himself, so she didn’t expect him to show himself to Sirius’ call even if he was still within earshot. She closed her eyes and leaned into her children beneath Mortis’ wings, exhaling steadying breaths before finally releasing Ari and Goss. "Speech"

Ari crashed into her mom and clung blissfully, her face enveloped in the familiar scented fur of the woman who had birthed and raised her. She made a small noise of protest as Zee moved her, but just clung harder in the new position as Gossy slammed into the spot she'd just been in. She was too caught up in her own excitement to notice her siblings' reticence, though she didn't get crushed so if she'd thought about it she'd notice she wasn't being crushed and - considering her mother's small size - if more siblings had piled in to hug the mother who'd they been told was dead she certainly would be. Instead she got a long, zen moment frozen in time, breathing in her mother's scent and just existing in bliss.

Then everything went dark and she barely stopped from squealing at the sudden surprise, but the soft enveloping blanket was made of feathers and there was a pressure of larger arms around them. Oh, Mortis. She giggled into her mother's fur and whisper-yelled back at him in a mock complaint born in the giddiness of the happy reunion, "Mortis that tickles!" But it was sobering to remember that Mortis had actually believed that Zee was dead - how much more shocking and relieving it must feel for him to suddenly have his mom back from the dead, instead of returning from being missing. She reached up to pat his wing soothingly, even though she had to spit out feathers and hold back a sneeze.

Finally she pushed back, balancing against whoever was behind her while she sought to grab her mom's face between her paws, to squish her cheeks as she moved her back and forth, peering at her critically. What she saw made a fierce frown replace the giddiness. "Mom you look like shhh- uhhh you look awful. What happened? Who did this to you?" She paused to further take in the signs of neglect and abuse that she hadn't caught in the initial rush of excitement and her scowl darkened further, an incongruous expression on a tiny pixie face. "I'll kill them. I'll..." She paused again, this time out necessity as words failed to express what she would do to anyone who'd dared hurt her mother, and she buried her face back into her mother's shoulder to cling again, not to cry or for comfort but to comfort Zee, who'd obviously been through some shit.

No one, no one, would fucking hurt Zee again even if Ari had to follow her everywhere as a body guard. She was small, but she was smart and she was determined so she'd be better at it than.... She blinked. "Wait, where's Azure?" She wasn't close to her older litter brother at all, but the thought that he really might be dead stoked her rage.

Gossamer closed her eyes tightly as tears fell across her cheeks. Her mother wrapped an arm around her and she cherished the feeling of the affectionate embrace. She'd missed that simple gesture so much. Zee held her close in a tight grip that would normally have sent her squirming away but this was not a normal occasion.

Her mother had come back from the dead. How could she react with anything other than sheer elation? Who else had been given a second chance to embrace a loved one?

Denial may have been her initial, and strongest, reaction to her mother's death but doubt had only increased as the days went by and especially after her failed search. She had been on her way to dealing with her mother's death. Seeking to push through anger in search of the acceptance that some of her siblings seemed to have come to so easily. She'd been a mess, a mix of hope and surrender, tipping on the later when her mother reappeared seemingly raised from the dead.

She still could barely process what was happening and instead focused on melting into her mother's embrace, feeling that solid form and silently praying she wasn't dreaming. She was dimly aware of the others arriving, in particular Mortis as his wings wrapped over the whole group of them. Her tears fell harder. This was everything she could have hoped for. Often during the day they'd all go their separate ways, meeting for group lessons, but often each pup getting absorbed in their own interests. The only thing that seemed a constant in her early child hood was everyone returning to the den in the evening. A pile of warmth and family. That's what they were now. Her heart ached with happiness to experience it again.

Eventually, Zee let her go and Gossamer stepped back. A paw wiped at her eyes as she tried to get the tears out of the way so she could see her mother clearly. Her tail continued to wag wildly as she gazed at her parents. "You must be hungry. Can I get you anything from the stores? Anything for any injuries? If you want to sleep in my den you can. Oh wait, actually its a mess, maybe not. Unless you like the smell of abscess root." Her words bubbled up in a rapid stream as her mind continued to process what was happening.

Aris spoke about someone doing something to her and Gossamer nodded quickly though she figured Sirius had probably already dealt harshly with anyone who had hurt their mother. At the mention of Azure, Gossamer's tail wag started to slow to a stop.  Yea… where was Azure. Her heart started to beat faster.

Briar could see the strain her hesitation caused her mother, but she couldn’t force herself any more than she had. She smiled shyly at the compliments she was given about her horns and how she was growing into a remarkable young woman. She hadn't really felt all that remarkable, but perhaps from the outside she seemed to be. "Thank you," she said softly and gave her mother another, warmer smile, trying to silently say that she was genuinely happy that she was alive since words seemed to fail her, before she stepped back to let Gossamer and Aris continue to fawn over her. It wasn't that she wasn't happy her mother was here, she was only conflicted by her own immediate response. She glanced at Ophelia and Kotori as they joined in, both of them seemingly as uncertain as herself. Kotori at least fell somewhere in the middle, more enthusiastic than herself, but not as audaciously over the top as their sisters. He had never really been the emotional one of the bunch though so his was expected.

She looked up at her father when he approached her, her ears flicking uncertainly. She didn’t know what he was going to say, but once she heard his whispered “I know” the shell she tried to hide behind started to chip. Did he know? Did he understand the uncertainty and the guilt she felt? Maybe he did, but it was still so hard. Why didn’t she feel like Gossamer and Aris seemed to? Why wasn’t she over joyed to see their mother again? Why did her mother feel like a stranger? He didn't really have to tell her that her mother had been through hell, she could see it in the thin frailness of her body. Somehow that only made her feel worse. Her mother had apparently been through so much and she couldn't even be thrilled to see her. There was more that she needed to sort through that she couldn't do here in front of everyone.

Still, she did as her father asked and moved closer to her mother again, finding a place just behind her so that her mother could almost lean back into her while she was being smothered by Gossamer and Aris. She looked up and smiled when she spotted Mortis coming toward them. She had gotten so much closer to her older brother recently and as she looked around at her siblings she realized he was the only one she felt like she could confide in freely. That thought hurt her even more than her own guilt about how she reacted to her mother reappearing, but that was something she shoved quickly to the back of her mind. That was a far larger issue than she had the strength to consider right now. She didn't like feeling like a stranger among her own family. Mort pulled a chuckle from her when he came and swept his wings around them, enveloping them in his own kind of bear hug. She leaned into the wing and the soft feathers that draped over one of her shoulders, smiling at the little comfort he brought.

Once her mother let go of Aris and Gossamer she slipped away again herself, but she didn't go far. She sat between Kotori and Mortis, waiting to see if they would find out more. Aris brought up the question of where Azure was and her brows lifted with recognition. Right, he had been thought dead as well, but now here their mother was proving them that maybe that wasn't the case. She glanced up across the plains toward the border as if she expected him to be standing there, but he wasn't. Yet another sibling she hadn't been close with. She waited to see what the answer would be, looking back and forth between her parents.

"Briar Fatalis"

It was a lot to deal with at once, a mix of emotions from joy to regret crashing against one another like an ocean storm. Like a deer in headlights she froze, the knot in her throat growing all the more present as she watched her siblings interact with their mother. And welcome her home.  She flinched as Sirius came beside her and offered her some much-needed reassurance. It wasn't hard to imagine what he thought of her, of the condition she'd sunk down into, but he held back for now. Even poked a little fun at her messy state, something that was part of her long before her Mother went away.

Her lip wobbled. There was a lot no one could admit around here, both good and bad, but things looked as though they'd get better from here on out. Surely. Maybe if they all tried their best. But even then with her family surrounding her and soft-spoken reassurances she was still at a loss at what to do, she'd been fairly touchy-feely as a pup but her self-imposed exclusion made her feel a little awkward, like she'd lost the right to be as casual as she used to be.

She took one hesitant step and then another, soon finding herself smushing her face against the crook of Zee's neck. She didn't smell right, distant with a mix of strange, unwelcome scents. Her ears remained flat against her head as she vaguely heard her family speak around her, caring muted words, she wasn't ready to join in the conversation yet, for now she just wanted to be close and silent. Present but not the centre of attention. She just wanted her Mum's comfort, surely that wasn't too much to ask for, right?