Although the training program hadn't really begun in earnest yet, Artorias still took every opportunity to learn and develop his skills while he was with the Armada. He observed and followed Sirius, learning firsthand from the Warlord. He practiced spars with Briar and Mortis. He had made acquaintances with Zee, Asla, and Gossamer. So far, he would have considered this trip a 100% total success—were it not for one grim detail he had noticed. During a patrol with Sirius, Artorias had spotted the form of a dark wolf, his deep green coat almost mistaken for black at a distance, but one he recognized in an instant. Artorias had only been able to stop and leer at the wolf for a split moment before he had to continue on lest he tip Sirius off to his shock and anger.

Grimshaw was here.

As the training proceeded, Artorias became aware that it was indeed Grimshaw, his disappeared adopted brother, now living amongst the Armada like nothing had ever changed. Worst of all, he was also training with Sirius, acting as if the Warlord was a new adoptive parent to him. It boiled Artorias' blood and made him feel roiling emotions he hadn't felt since his mother's death. He had so many things he wanted to say to Grim, so many things he wanted to do to punish the wolf that had turned his back on his family. He wouldn't do it in front of an audience, however. No matter how he felt, Artorias had no reason to embarrass or destroy the boy's new life in front of everyone. He would give him the decency of a private altercation. But on his mother's grave, they would have words or there would be blood spilt.

It wasn't difficult for Artorias to find where Grimshaw was denning. Of course the damned traitor had his own den in the Armada instead of bunking in the barracks. Once he knew where Grim slept, Artorias began planning how he wanted to handle this. He waited until the end of his training the following day, and then, still clad in his armor with Embershard slung across his back, Artorias headed to Grimshaw's den. He poked his head in to see if his target was inside, then sat outside the den with a furious scowl and waited for his former brother to show up. Sooner or later, Grim would have to come back, and when he did Artorias had words that needed to be said.

Grimshaw would not get away from this.


"Artorias" | Thoughts | "Corbin"

One big happy family

Artorias has two ravens named Corbin and Eira and a fox named Argent. Assume they are within calling distance at all times.
As his mate, Briar may enter Artorias' threads unless marked Private.
____________________

CODE © SKELLE 2021 & ART © ULFEID3 @ DA
"Speech!"
It was only a matter of time before Artorias would confront Grimshaw or the other way around, but it would appear to be sooner rather than later. He had only been out on a short hunt, although came back empty handed. Not because he failed at catching or finding anything, but because he was bored and that simply wasn't scratching the itch. He'd found the herd of deer and watched them for some time before huffing and heading back to the Armada. He shouldn't have been gone as long as he was anyway and hurried back. Although he knew Artorias was training with the Armada as well, he wondered if his brother knew that this would be his home, at least for a while. Grimshaw didn't intend on just training here, he intended on making something for himself here. Artorias had his place in the Hallows, where Grim never felt he belonged. But here? Here felt more like home than anywhere else ever had. If he needed anything, it would be a place he could actually call home. The hallows felt... like a dream, if anything. He valued what Resin had done for him, and he would never forgive himself for leaving when he did, but he couldn't change the past and there was no sense in dwelling on it. Resin was gone. His mom was gone. He couldn't dwell on everything forever.

He wasn't surprised to pick up on the young mans scent as he neared his den. He hadn't realized the others were staying elsewhere, not within their own dens, but he wasn't complaining. Sirius felt he was worth giving a personal den to, so Grimshaw would make sure that Sirius would be proud. If Artorias, the so decided future of the Hallows, had to stay in the barracks with the other students, well, it only made him smirk. That smirk was still plastered on his face when he approached the tri-colored boy. "I knew that I'd find you here sooner or later," he mused as he calmly sat across from the young alpha.

welcome to the freakshow

It didn't take much waiting before the sage-furred brute he had been looking for made himself present. Artorias had suspected the wolf would slink back to hide in his den at the first chance he could and his hunch had been correct. His gaze hardened when he saw that smug smirk on the face of the boy only slightly taller than he was, amber eyes burning with the same colors as the sunset sky overhead. "Oh, so you do have some reasoning and logic inside that thick skull after all," he snapped back, making his intentions here clear from the get-go. Artorias was not here for idle chitchat, nor was he here to see how his wayward brother had been. "I had my doubts when you decided to turn tail and run away from the family that took you in."

How much did Grimshaw actually know about what had happened in the Hallows? The boy had vanished shortly after their move into the castle. Had he been skulking about just outside of his family's eyes, or had he truly abandoned them at the first chance he got? Did he know about Resin, about Ulric's ascent and their mother's death—no. Not their mother. His mother. Grimshaw had lost all rights to call Resin anything to him. Gods, even just looking at him sitting there as calm as ever, like he hadn't committed a grave offense against his family, made Artorias want to draw his sword and just have at the bastard.

"How long did it take you before you decided we weren't worth pretending to like anymore? How long before you decided my parents' nurturing and love wasn't good enough for you?" His words were spat with the venom of a wolf scorned. "When was it? Mid-winter before you left for good? We stopped seeing you around the castle by then and you evaded all of our search efforts. Why?" He wanted to see just when Grimshaw had decided they weren't worth it to him, and also to gauge how much he knew about what had happened in his absence.


"Artorias" | Thoughts | "Corbin"

One big happy family

Artorias has two ravens named Corbin and Eira and a fox named Argent. Assume they are within calling distance at all times.
As his mate, Briar may enter Artorias' threads unless marked Private.
____________________

CODE © SKELLE 2021 & ART © ULFEID3 @ DA
"Speech!"
Grimshaw listened patiently to the verbal onslaught Artorias attacked him with. In a lot of ways he was right, but in others he was so wrong. Of course, it was something a child that only lost one mother would understand, but maybe he should try losing two. Maybe, just maybe, he'd have a sense of the worth Grimshaw felt knowing every mother that cared for him died. Would he take comfort in knowing that? Probably not. There was no reasoning with him and that was fine. It'd just be a waste of breath anyway.

Unfortunately, he couldn't just ignore it and walk away for he sat outside his den and would surely follow him should he choose to 'avoid' the situation. He wouldn't be avoiding it in the way Artorias would see it, as running away, but actually choosing to not let himself go down that road. It certainly wouldn't look good to Sirius, and he couldn't risk losing what he did have. Once Artorias was done, pausing in wait for some excuse, Grimshaw took a deep breath.

"If you're going to listen to me about one thing in your life, let it be this- it doesn't look good on you, as the future of the hallows, to lose your calm here. Come inside and I'll explain." Grimshaw hardly waited for an answer before standing and walking around him and into his den. Only once Artorias was inside would he continue and tell him things he'd kept to himself.

welcome to the freakshow

Artorias was almost as aggravated by Grimshaw's lack of response, his total apathy to everything, as he would have been to the boy simply admitting that he didn't care for him or his adoptive family. At least with the latter he'd have an excuse to feel the anger he did towards Grim. Instead he was given nothing, just a blank, emotionless canvas staring back at him through silver eyes. Artorias was just begging, begging for Grim to say or do something to provoke him, to give him a reason and an excuse to carve that passive look right off his stupid fucking face. But Grimshaw didn't give him a thing. He sat there and took everything the Carpathius boy spat his way, all the vitriol and venom like it was rain rolling off his back. It frustrated, infuriated, and bewildered Artorias. This was not the reaction he had been expecting from Grim.

Once he was done and a long enough pause had passed between them, Grimshaw chided him for losing his composure as the heir to the Hallows. Artorias' lips curled back in a small snarl; what the hell did this vagabond know about decorum and optics? He'd been the one to runaway like an ungrateful wretch when his family was at their lowest point; he was one to talk about looking good to others. But Artorias was still left wanting by his response, and it seemed the only way to progress was to follow Grimshaw into his den. Artorias didn't like this idea. The den would be close quarters, familiar to his opponent and wholly unknown to him. If Grimshaw decided to get violent, he'd have an advantage. But it was also the only way for Artorias to get the answers he demanded.

So, with cautious trepidation, Artorias followed behind Grimshaw into his den. The place was unsurprisingly sparse, with just the essentials for living. Even when he'd lived in the Hallows, Grimshaw had been a very minimal wolf. It appeared that was just a manifestation of his personality: utilitarian, empty, function over form. In the privacy of the den, Artorias moved to position himself near the entrance to give himself a chance to bolt if he had to make a quick escape, but far enough in that they could speak without fear of eavesdroppers. "Okay, we're inside. What do you need to explain?" he asked, voice terse and to the point, a clear reflection of the pain Artorias felt from Grim's disrespect and abandonment. He peered over at the young man, Artorias' form half illuminated by the bright setting sun spilling into the den, casting warm light and hard shadows across him while he watched the stranger he had once called brother.


"Artorias" | Thoughts | "Corbin"

One big happy family

Artorias has two ravens named Corbin and Eira and a fox named Argent. Assume they are within calling distance at all times.
As his mate, Briar may enter Artorias' threads unless marked Private.
____________________

CODE © SKELLE 2021 & ART © ULFEID3 @ DA
"Speech!"
He knew it would be tough for Artorias to follow him into the den, though it was that little bit of trust that eased Grimshaw only a little bit more into explaining himself. He didn't feel that he should have to, though this unending tension between them would become too strong sooner or later and it was only a matter of time. Based on what he'd just witnessed, it wouldn't be long. Even if he knew the truth, however, he didn't have to accept it. Grimshaw held onto that small sliver of hope.

"I'm not going to do anything, I promise." Even if Artorias had put a fleck of trust into him, he still clung closer to the entrance than to where he chose to sit on a fur he'd gathered from the storage. He couldn't blame him, but Grimshaw wouldn't risk what he'd been given here. He waited to see if he'd come closer or not, but pressed on regardless. "Whether you choose to believe me or not is your choice, but it's the truth nonetheless." He started with a sigh, never before imagining that he'd be sitting in his den and explaining himself to anyone. Especially Artorias.

"You know that when Resin found me, my mother had just died. It was my fault, inadvertently. Had I stayed where I was told instead of playing with a cub, she wouldn't have been killed. Resin found me shortly after, buried her, and brought me back to the hallows. It wasn't long after that the hallows moved south, away from my mothers grave. I hadn't properly processed her death, and then we moved." He paused for a breath, keeping his eyes focused on his paws. "I hated it. I hated being so far from my mothers grave, regardless of being adopted by your family. I didn't know how to cope with it, with having a 'new' family. I didn't want a new family, I wanted my mother back. It wasn't her fault. It should have been me. After a time it became clear to me that I didn't deserve a new family. I wasn't like you or the others anyway. At best, I was a disappointment to Resin."

The pause was longer this time before he took another breath and continued. "I decided then that I would go back to my mothers grave and try to accept the loss and what I'd done. A group found me there, and although I did intend on returning, I... didn't feel worthy of it, I guess. You all would be better off without me. I went with them to try and find myself, but that was a mistake. When I finally returned to the hallows, it was on the day Ulric called the meeting to announce he was stepping in. After that meeting, Sirius found me standing at the edge ready to end the suffering I've caused others. If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be here, or even alive." He finished, finally raising his silver gaze to match Artorias' orange one. He wasn't sure how much Artorias believed, if any of it, but he could only hope that it offered at least some insight as to why Grimshaw did what he did.

welcome to the freakshow

Although he wanted to remain furious for the indignation and disrespect Grimshaw had shown his family, Artorias was finding it hard to keep that fire of anger burning when the boy just continued to look stoic and somewhat pitiful. Grim urged him that he wasn't going to do anything, and although Artorias didn't trust him, he also couldn't recall a single time Grimshaw had ever shown him any aggression or intended him harm. It was that little bit of trust that allowed the black and blue wolf to relax some with a drawn out sigh. Paws carried him over to where Grimshaw sat, joining him on the furs, keeping his eyes on the larger boy's mercurian silver while he shrugged his sword off of his shoulders and set it at his side, offering Grim the same degree of trust. If he meant no harm, then Artorias would accept the olive branch for now and disarm himself as well.

Grimshaw explained how he had been unable to cope with the loss of his birth mother, how the separation had torn him up and how he had never felt worthy of being a part of a "new family", that he didn't deserve them. Artorias knew of the tragedy that had befallen Grimshaw and the circumstances surrounding his adoption. At the time he hadn't been able to empathize with that sort of pain and loss. After Resin's death, he knew better what the sage-furred wolf had experienced at such a tender age. If the agony had been so great to him at a year of age, how much had it crushed the heart and soul of a pup? All through Grim's story and explanation of his actions Artorias remained silent, taking in the other boy's words with respectful contemplation. His desertion of his family, his retreat back to his mother's grave, how he traveled with another group for some time, how he didn't feel he could come back, how he'd returned shortly before Resin's death and how he tried to end his own life.

It was a lot to take in, a lot to process and compare to the anger he had felt at Grim for leaving their family when they'd needed everyone as much as they had. Grimshaw's story ended, and once more he found himself looking into the molten silver of the eyes he never thought he'd see again. Artorias didn't speak for a long moment, perhaps trying to put the words together in his mind, or perhaps to process the emotions roiling inside him like a restless sea. Artorias had always struggled with his own anger, releasing it on Grim would have felt justified ten minutes ago. Now... Now he didn't know how to feel. If he had been in Grimshaw's position, would he have behaved any differently? It was easy to sit on the side of the victim and condemn the trespasser—but was it justified to hate him?

Artorias sucked in a deep breath, held it within his lungs, then slowly released it in a measured breath. His eyes, though always appearing to smolder with their amber irises flecked with gold like a living fire, had lost the hardness they held for his former brother. The tension in his body disappeared and he just looked... sad. "If it wasn't for Resin, you wouldn't be here or or even alive either," he pointed out, his voice dipping into a lower pitch as he no longer felt the need to seethe or yell. "I didn't know what you were going through, Grim—none of us did. But we didn't because you didn't give us the chance to. You were a part of our family, just as much as any of my siblings. You weren't a disappointment to Resin. Before you disappeared, she had planned a feast for all of us, giving us her name. She wanted to do that for you and it hurt her deeply when you vanished." He didn't intend to hurt the boy with his words—or maybe he did a little—but he needed Grim to know what he had given up, what he had missed by turning his back on them.

"Regardless of what you felt or thought of us, I always saw you as my brother, and I loved you like one. I would have stood by you and helped you through whatever you were facing, whether it was your demons or Rudy's bullshit." He hoped his attempt to get some sort of emotional reaction from the larger wolf would do something. Seeing Grim sit there so emotionless felt like another slap in the face. "No matter what you think of yourself, you were one of us, and we would have done anything for you. But... you just didn't see us that way. You never gave us the chance. How can you know you wouldn't fit in when you spent all your time pushing us away?" He sighed again and shook his head, averting his eyes down for what he wanted to say next. He didn't want Grim to see the hurt in his eyes when he spoke. "It hurt me when I thought I'd lost a brother, but it hurts me even more knowing that you hadn't died, you just... didn't want us. You left us when our family was at its lowest and needed all the support it could get. Resin died thinking you were dead when all this time you just... didn't care to come back."

Turning fiery-hued eyes back up to shining silver, Artorias asked, "Just tell me honestly, did we ever mean anything to you?"


"Artorias" | Thoughts | "Corbin"

One big happy family

Artorias has two ravens named Corbin and Eira and a fox named Argent. Assume they are within calling distance at all times.
As his mate, Briar may enter Artorias' threads unless marked Private.
____________________

CODE © SKELLE 2021 & ART © ULFEID3 @ DA
"Speech!"
Artorias had quietly and politely listened while he spoke, explaining himself, so he did the same and respected him. He knew he was wrong in so many ways for what he had done, but hindsight was fifty-fifty. Unfortunately, he couldn't change the past and if he knew how he would most certainly. But that wasn't an option and something that he would have to live with for the rest of his life. When he asked one final question, however, Grimshaw frowned and looked at his paws. Of course they meant something to him, they were the family he never had. The siblings he didn't have before. It hurt him to be asked such a painful question, and he was sure he was painful for his brother to ask, fearing the worst. The hesitation certainly wasn't helping either, he supposed, and finally looked back up to meet his brothers fiery gaze.

"Of course. Resin saved my life and even before, I never had siblings." Had he thought a little harder, it would have made more sense even. Without siblings, he lacked a lot of social development as a pup. He was raised alone and with only a single adult, his mother. Although siblings and someone to play with was always what he wanted, once he had it he didn't know what to do with it. He offered a weak smile to Artorias after a moment. "It's because of Resin that I'm here. I need to prove myself."

welcome to the freakshow

His question caused Grimshaw to look down at his feet. Was he ashamed, perhaps just considering his answer? Artorias didn't press, he gave the fellow yearling the time he needed to collect his thoughts. Time stretched on between them, but Artorias continued to wait. He needed this answer; needed to know what he had been to this wolf he'd considered a brother once. He finally got his answer when Grim looked back up and admitted that they did matter, that he owed it to Resin to make himself worth something. It didn't require much scrutiny from Artorias to know that Grim was telling the truth. There was a softness in the larger wolf's silver eyes, a vulnerability that showed he was being honest.

Wordlessly, the blue-furred wolf nodded his head, his eyes dipping from Grim's for a moment while he reflected on the anger he'd felt, the bitterness of betrayal. That fire had been tamped down, smothered until only embers remained. He knew he had a choice to make. He could either forgive Grimshaw and work towards making amends, he could cut ties with the wolf and never see his face again, or he could hate him for the pain of the past and hold onto that grudge for the rest of his days. After spending so much time angry with Grimshaw for abandoning them, letting go seemed impossible. But Artorias also didn't want to live with hate in his heart. It was a poison, and he would not allow it to hold him.

He had his answer before he had even started to consider it.

Artorias drew in a deep breath, holding it trapped within his lungs, then slowly released it in a sigh. His tense shoulders slumped and his expression softened. Amber eyes turned back up to meet silver. Artorias no longer saw an enemy in front of him. He saw his brother. "I was prepared to spend the rest of my life hating you for leaving us the way you did, Grim," he began, "but that's not what I want my life to be. I don't want to spend my days hating, and I don't want others to hurt for the mistakes of the past." Rising to his paws, Artorias took a few cautious steps closer to Grimshaw, moving gradually towards the larger young man until he could reach closer and attempt to pull Grim into a hug. It was something the two had never shared as pups, but it felt like something they both needed.

"I won't ever pretend to know what you went through, Grim. But I do hope this isn't the end. You'll always be my brother, regardless of what you think or feel, and no matter where your path takes you, the gates of the Hallows will be open to you." It was a small gesture, but Artorias hoped the impact of his promise wasn't lost on Grimshaw. He still regarded the wolf as his brother, someone he would come running for and stand beside, someone who would have a bed in the castle ready to receive them if they found their way back. Artorias pulled back some, giving Grimshaw a trace of a smile and said, "I hope you find what you're looking for here."


"Artorias" | "Corbin" | "Argent"

One big happy family

Artorias has two ravens named Corbin and Eira and a fox named Argent. Assume they are within calling distance at all times.
As his mate, Briar may enter Artorias' threads unless marked Private.
____________________

CODE © SKELLE 2021 & ART © ULFEID3 @ DA
"Speech!"

Grimshaw couldn’t help but let the anxiety and stress weigh down on him until this point. He knew that the others must think ill of him for leaving, likely with Artorias at the helm, stoking the fires or at least keeping the kindling aflame. He couldn’t be sure, but he assumed the Carpathius boy would speak for the lot of them if they all felt the same. He was the heir to the Aegis throne, afterall. Of course, Grimshaw couldn’t be certain that he wasn’t here for his own purposes or the Carpathius’ as a whole. Either way, the answer would still be the same.

When Artorias started to speak, the pressure in his chest grew deeper and stronger for a moment until suddenly it released and a breath suddenly escaped that he hadn’t been aware he’d been holding in. It was a major relief to hear Artorias say all that he did then. Artorias didn’t want to spend his days hating him for the mistakes he’d made and Grimshaw was ever so grateful. He hated himself enough for it, he didn’t need others hating on him more than they already did or were.

”It means a lot to me to hear that, Artorias.” He said through the hug, wrapping his arms around the form of his slightly smaller brother. He pulled the blue boy close for a moment, only to let go as he continued and welcomed him back to the Hallows whenever he may decide. Of course, the Armada would be his home for now...but that didn’t mean that he wouldn’t find his way back to the Hallows in the future.

”I hope so, too. I hope that you learn all that you need to lead the Hallow’s in Resin’s light.” A smile flickered over his face, knowing well that Ulric had been leading the Hallows for some time. Following in Ulric’s pawsteps wasn’t the same as following in Resin’s, at least in his opinion. Not that he didn’t appreciate the man for taking over when Resin was ill, but he wasn’t Resin.

welcome to the freakshow