Fern sits out in the garden, enjoying the warmth the sun offers. Eyes closed, she hums softly to herself, thinking of how much her luck has changed. Her hurried return to Hallows had been born of necessity but what she has found since her return… well, it boggles her mind. For so long Fern has hated herself, thought that everything she does is wrong and that she is a failure. Yet, here the gray girl has found forgiveness, family… and love. Fern’s heart thumps a little harder at the thought of Rudyard. Fear had made her stay away, fear of his anger and of him loathing her had caused Fern to stay far away, even when she needed them most.

A heavy sigh is released as she opens her eyes, blinking away the dark spots that dance in her vision for a moment. So much happened in such a short amount of time and it thrills and terrifies Fern all at once. Part of wants to run, to escape this dream-like happiness she has found herself in. That way nothing will shatter it. If she leaves, this place and these wolves, they will forever remain a joyful memory. And yet, that is all they will be; a memory. The unknown is scary and Fern is afraid of losing Rudy already. He speaks of hunting down Oxx and making him pay for everything he has done… and that makes her worry even more.

His scars are still there, wounds not only on his flesh but in Rudy’s heart. Rudyard is strong and has thrown himself into training, determined to beat the demon that haunts him. And Fern? Fear, doubt, and worthlessness pull at her, tugging her in a million directions all at once. If she runs, she can protect herself from pain to come. From the worried filled days and tear-filled nights. From the happiness and love. From… everything good that has ever happened to her. Fern huffs an angry sigh at herself trying to understand why she feels this way.

Suddenly, like a ray sun peeking out from behind the clouds, Fern realizes that is more like Meadow than she thinks. Fern had thought Meadow was weak. That Meadow had ran. And in the end, Meadow died sad and alone. Sadness fils her chest as she truly understands her mother’s hesitation and fear. It was a way to protect her gentle soul from all the bad things in the world. After all, they can’t happen if you don’t give them the chance to. Yet, in removing herself from the picture, Meadow also lost the opportunity to find happiness and joy. To let those she loved, surprise and astonish her.

Fern will not make the same mistake. Standing up, Fern tips her head back to call for Artorias. She requests his presence when he is available and lowers her head when she is done. For once, there is no fear in her voice. For once in her life, Fern knows exactly what she wants to do and she is going to ask for it.


"Fern"

More and more lately, Artorias found himself in some form or another of training, working to recuperate from his illness and to improve himself after his calamitous battle with Oxx. The young alpha was perched precariously high on the castle walls, an old sword clutched between his jaws. From the raised parapets he moved with slow and fluid grace, each paw stepping between the gaps of the stones while swinging his sword to and fro, up and down. The blade sliced cleanly through the air, and with each stroke, Artorias pictured his malicious brother at the other end of it. That grin, those dead and soulless eyes, his laughter, the sting of his teeth in the back of his neck... Vivid flashbacks burst like still photos before his eyes with every swing. Artorias kept his breathing steady, teeth gritted over the hilt of the sword, fighting back his anger. Losing his temper had cost him the fight, as had fighting with honor. He would not make those mistakes again.

The call for him came as a surprise and caught the alpha mid-stride. He froze with two paws in the air, balanced on the precipice of the wall. He held still, ears flicking to catch the sound. It had come from just below somewhere in the gardens. Keeping a tight hold of his sword, Artorias coiled his muscles and sprung from the parapets onto the castle wall, moving at a brisk pace down the stairs to the courtyard below. He found Fern alone in the gardens, basking in the autumnal sun amongst the flowers and wisteria trees. He approached with sword in his jaws, lamenting the fact he no longer had Embershard or its scabbard that he could more easily stow and carry it. This old hunk of metal was a poor substitute by comparison.

Artorias brought himself to stand before Fern, then drove the sword into the ground, propping it upright by wedging the blade into the soft earth. "Fern," he greeted her with a simple nod of his head to their familial guest. She seemed untroubled and unharmed, so he reasoned she must have had some business for him to address. "What can I do for you?"

"Artorias Carpathius"

Fern waits for the leader of the Hallows, standing with quiet determination, in the sun. For the first time in… well forever, the gray girl has a moment of peaceful reflection. Has found a reason to be happy, to go on and she wants to protect it. She feels the familiar fears slowly creeping in from the dark corners of her mind. They wait, ready to pounce on her in a moment of weakness and fill her head with horrible ‘what ifs’. However, Artorias arrives swiftly and Fern is grateful for that. His presence keeps the dark thoughts at bay and she watches him quietly as he shoves a sword into the earth. Aqua eyes linger a moment on the deadly object before moving to meet Art’s ember eyes.

His voice soothes her, lets her know that the leader is there to help her and a soft smile appears on gray lips. With determination in her voice, Fern says, “I want to join the Hallows.” She lifts her head, proud to be asking such a question. And yet… there are things Artorias needs to know. Quickly she adds, “Let me explain.” Gesturing a paw toward the ground next to her, Fern invites the leader to sit. Following her own advice, the gray girl folds her back legs to sit once more and waits for Art to make his choice. Fern bows her head as she orders her thoughts and slows the frantic thumping of her heart.

Inhaling deeply, Fern brings her head up to look over the gardens. When she speaks, her voice is calm and detached, like a person reciting facts. She says, “I know Rudy told you about my mother, Meadow. How she and Resin were sisters. But… there is more to the story than that.” Memories take form in front of her eyes as continues, trying to hold her emotions in check, “I was born in a wandering band of ragtag wolves to a mother who was prone to flights of fancy. Meadow meant well… she really did but anytime she found something even resembling happiness, she ran.”

A shrug of gray shoulders tries to show she is indifferent to this fact but a deep sadness resides in her eyes. A sigh escapes as Fern explains, the sadness tinting the words, “It made for a rough beginning, always moving without knowing why I had to leave my friends behind. Still, l loved her and, for all her flaws… she loved me.” A sad smile ghosts over gray lips and Fern shoots a glance toward Art before continuing, “Everything changed when she died. I lost everything that day and… I didn’t think I could go on. But there was something she told me, something I held onto during the long months after. It was a name… her name. Resin.”

Fern’s eyes move to look into Art’s ember gaze, to try and convey the hope that she held onto in the long, dark, lonely nights. After a moment she drops her gaze, suddenly feeling unworthy to hold the gaze of a son of Resin. Emotions leak into every word as she keeps talking, “Resin was the flicker of hope I hung my life on. When I got here and found out she was dead… I just wanted to disappear. But Rudy gave me hope. Well, he did for little while.” Another shrug as thinks of the events that led up to her swift departure during the ooze. But Artorias knows about that and about what had happened in the infirmary so she glosses over that part.

A shy, happy smile slowly tugs her lips up and excitement laces as Fern says, “When I came back, I was afraid he was angry at me, hated me for… well… being me.” The smile grows as she shakes her head. The tone of her voice changing to one of joy and slight bewilderment as she says, “But Rudy didn’t hate me! He wasn’t even mad. And I… kind of…” Gray paws shift against the ground as her heart hammers in her chest. Is she really going to admit her feelings for Rudy to his brother? “I love Rudy.” Aqua eyes round in fear as she looks up to the leader of the Hallows. Did she really just blurt that out? Quickly she speeds ahead, needing to voice the words before Artorias can react, “I love Rudy and I want to stay and protect the wolf I love. And… I want to protect the family I have found.”


"Fern"

Fern spoke with such conviction of her desires, and her wish was one Artorias had seen coming from a mile away. Of course Fern was going to want to join the Hallows; he'd expected such a thing from the moment Rudy brought her back here during the Long Night. And with the influx of new members recently, why shouldn't she want to stay? The Hallows was rapidly expanding, and pretty soon they'd be running out of bedrooms in the castle! But before he could answer her request, Fern said she needed to explain why she wanted to stay. Artorias raised a curious brow and tilted his head when she gestured for him to have a seat, and Artorias realized he was in for a ride. "Oh boy, that bad, huh...?" he said with a little tease in his smirk while he followed Fern's request and reclined back to his haunches beside the monochromatic fae.

All the while Fern spoke and told him of her life, the young Aegis listened with keen and attentive ears. He soaked up her tale, internalizing every detail she shared with him about her birth and childhood, about her mother Meadow, about the instability and uncertainty she grew up knowing. His bright amber eyes darkened a touch when she spoke of Meadow's death and how it had impacted her, changed her, but also gave her purpose and direction. It was hard for Artorias to maintain a stoic expression when Fern spoke about Resin. Even now, with a year's worth of healing, the scars he felt on his heart for his departed mother still hurt as much as the day he'd lost her. Perhaps he would never truly get over the loss of Resin—but then again, did any child ever fully recover from the death of a parent?

Artorias said nothing for the entirety of Fern's story. He simply let her speak her thoughts and feelings, let her express all that she needed to say, met her gaze when she looked to him and glanced around the gardens when she turned away. She explained how her hope had died when she learned Resin had, then detailed how that hope had returned with Rudy in her life. Artorias glanced curiously at the smaller wolf, head cocked to the side. Was she implying what he thought she was implying? A smile grew on her face, her aqua eyes lit up unbeknownst to her, and she looked positively giddy talking about his brother. Artorias knew what was happening before she ever spoke the words, but they still came as a surprise to him. Fern loved Rudyard. Though there were a few blinks of surprise, there was no trace of negativity or disapproval in Artorias' countenance. Why would there be? Hell, he was sleeping with Bowen on a semi-regular basis. They had become so unequivocally close since her return, how could he fault Rudy and Fern? Love, in its most primal form, was love, after all, and there was no familial blood between them despite the title of cousins.

When she was done speaking, Artorias held Fern's cool-hued gaze for a while, digesting everything he'd been given to ponder. The young brute nodded his head and glanced back across the gardens, taking in a deep breath, then releasing it in a drawn-out sigh. "When my mother passed, I felt... empty. I felt like I'd lost my entire reason for existing. Everything I'd ever known, everything I'd worked for, it was all with her. Watching her slip away was the hardest part, but when she was finally gone, I was just... empty and angry." Artorias paused for another breath, casting his gaze up at the clouds in the sky. "I was angry that I couldn't do anything to help her. I was angry that she seemed to just give up, and so did everyone else. I was angry that this happened at all. I felt powerless, and that anger began to define me." Rising to large paws, Artorias stepped away from Fern to approach a rose bush, examining the brightly blooming red flowers closely. "When the anger passed and I was left hollow, it took my mother's words to remind me of a simple truth I'd forgotten. It's not the past that defines who you are. It's the choices you've made and continue to make. You're either ruled by your past and remain stuck in it or you make peace with it and you grow. I was ruled by anger, just like you were ruled by fear after Meadow's death."

Once he had selected a large rose, Artorias very carefully exposed the thorny vine and sliced through it with one claw. He turned the rose over in his paw a few times before clutching it between his teeth and moving back over to where Fern was sitting. He resumed his place at her side and set the rose down on the ground between his paws, fire-kissed eyes looking to his cousin once more. "I am glad that Rudy gave you hope once more. I'm glad that you found love with him—gods knows he needs someone to keep an eye on him—and that you want to be with him. But you need to find purpose within yourself, not just with others, Fern. You need to love yourself as much as you want to love him. Otherwise, you'll always have one paw out the door the moment things turn bad. And bad things are a part of life. It's how you handle the good and the bad that matters." He gave Fern a few moments to mull over what he had said. Then he slid the rose over to her, setting it delicately between her paws. "You shouldn't ever forget your past, but you can't let it define who you are. That's what the Hallows is all about—healing, growth, improvement. It's what our family is all about, the family you've always been a part of, whether you knew we existed or not."

As if anticipating her question, Artorias gestured to the rose on her paws. "A rose is a symbol of love. I'm sure it would brighten Rudy up to receive one from you." It was a subtle blessing from the Aegis that he understood their budding romance and offered his support. All of his siblings were starting to grow up and find their own ways in the world, it was nearly enough to choke the young wolf up. "So tell me, Fern Lark, can you learn to grow from your past? Are you ready to stop running and find out who you really are?" It was a heavy and serious question, but one he had to know the answer to before he said anything else. Fern had already run from them once. Was she truly ready for a new life and all that came with it?

"Artorias Carpathius"

Art’s teasing smirk earns the leader a soft chuckle and shake of the gray girl’s skull. When he is seated, Fern allows the words to pour forth, everything she has felt and tried to hide is put out into the open. When she speaks of Rudy, the fluttering of butterflies in her stomach causes her heart to thump harder and she rushes through the end. Art holds her gaze for a while and Fern feels her pulse slow back to normal rhythm. There is no malice or anger in his gaze and she feels like a great weight has been lifted from her shoulders. Somehow, voicing the fears Fern has faced alone for so long has made them tangible and less scary.

Artorias sits in solemn silence, absorbing and processing everything she has laid before him. For a moment guilt rises as Fern worries she has burdened the young leader with her trivial life story but she does not look away. Fern tells herself that these are important things he needs to know, things he needs to understands before he agrees to let her stay. When Art nods his head and looks back out across the gardens, Fern feels her eyes following the direction of his gaze. His drawn-out sigh has her eyes snapping back to his face, trying to find any hint of anger or hate on his features. There is none. Instead she sees a wounded child, grieving for the loss of a parent… just like her.

Her gaze softens as Fern realizes that she shares more in common with Art than she first thought. Art’s speaks, his words revealing a glimpse into his world… into his soul and Fern watches him with silent sympathy. When he tilts his head back to look up at the sky, she realizes just how young he really is. While he holds the mantle of leadership effortlessly, inspiring others and encouraging his pack, Fern sees the wounded pup that lies beneath the surface. When he stands and walks to the rose bush, inspecting the flowers closely, Fern continues to stare after him. The threads of his story wrap around them both, tying their lives together with their mutual understanding of loss… and helplessness.

He finds a rose and expertly cuts the flower away and Fern’s gaze trails from his face down to his paw and the rose. He returns with the flower, setting it on the ground and turning his intense gaze to her. She meets his fiery eyes with her own cool oceans, her gaze soft and loving as she listens to every word he says. As he speaks, Fern does not feel the urge to drop her eyes instead holding his gaze as his words wash over her. Emotions play across her face, flashing and disappearing before they can fully manifest. Artorias dregs up feelings long buried, bring them out into the light and Fern feels herself letting go of them.

Art slides the rose over toward her, sitting it between her paws and Fern looks down the delicate flower as he speaks. Her heart swells and head shoots up to look at him as he tells her that she is part of the family. Brow furrows but Art seems to know her thoughts as he gestures toward the rose and gives Fern and Rudy his blessing… even if it is a subtle way. Then he asks a serious question and she realizes this is the most important question anyone has asked her. The heaviness of the situation pulls her eyes down toward the flower, thoughts jumbling and mixing as she tries to come up with the right words.

A smile appears and her gray head lifts, fire and ice meeting as she takes a deep breath. Voice filled with conviction, Fern says, “Yes.” The answer is simple, to the point but loaded with determination. There is a time for words and a time for actions. Fern feels that it is time to move forward.

"Fern"

Fern took her time listening as he spoke. Artorias saw the gears turning behind the cool aqua eyes, saw her absorbing and internalizing the lessons he was imparting and the connection he was building. It was vital for an alpha to know who his wolves were, who they wanted to be, and what they needed of him. Fern was strong-willed and pure of heart, but she was fragile and unsure. She needed to find confidence in herself, find a purpose for herself, and find a place she felt she could thrive in. Artorias could offer her these things, but it would be up to her entirely to choose to take them.

For a long while, the girl sat in silence, pondering over what he had said. Artorias appreciated that. She didn't jump right into making a life changing decision, nor did she hem and haw over it. She was carefully considering her options, what each one would mean for her, and deciding what she wanted for her life. After some time to deliberate to herself, Fern lifted her head until their eyes met once more. A forest fire and an untamed ocean, both wild and powerful, held captive within the two wolves' souls. Then she smiled, and Artorias knew what her answer would be. “Yes.” The corners of Art's mouth turned upwards in a smile. Just like that, it was done. Without a word, Artorias leaned closer so he could wrap a foreleg around Fern's back, gently guiding the smaller fae into a warm embrace to welcome her into the pack. "Welcome home, Fern," he spoke in smooth baritone lyrics.

Once he'd pulled back again, Artorias looked over the wolf before him, doing his best not to snicker as he began to wonder how long it would take before he saw Rudy and Fern before him again asking him to officiate their wedding. Ah, but one small step at a time! "As a member of the Hallows, you have free rein to come and go as you please. I only ask that you adhere to our laws and customs. As you grow in the Hallows, so to will your path and rank. All wolves start off Hallowed, then branch out into their chosen skills and roles." He paused for a moment to raise a curious brow to Fern. "...Unless you already know which path you'd like to take?" Another question hit him then, and a bit of a cheeky smirk touched his face. It was the same question that he'd had to ask Audra when she'd joined the Hallows. "Every wolf is also allowed to have their own room within the castle... unless you'll be sleeping in Rudy's room?" Just how far had Rudy and Fern's relationship gone so far? Artorias supposed he was about to find out...

"Artorias Carpathius"

Art’s mouth ticks up and he leans toward Fern, wrapping a leg her and guiding her in for a warm embrace. Fern moves to lean into him, burying her face into his fur and inhaling the scent of the Hallows… of home. His words have the gray girl’s smile growing and she closes her eyes, sinking into the embrace of family. When he pulls back, Fern’s tail is wagging happily and she takes a step back to listen to the rules. Even with the smile still on her lips, she nods at Art’s words, taking them to heart. He asks if she knows what path she would like to take and Fern nods her head, saying, “Well, I have dreamed of being a fighter for a long time. I would like to train to become a great warrior! Like you and Rudy.”

Eyes turn to the sword that is stuck in the ground near them and Fern points a paw toward it saying, “I want to learn how to wield something like that.” Realization hits and she turns quickly to look into Artorias’s fire-kissed eyes. Excitedly Fern exclaims, “Art, would you teach me how to use one? Maybe not one that big but you know… one more my size.” She is so caught up in her excitement, that Fern misses the moment she calls Artorias, Art. Well, they are family, hopefully he won’t mind too much. Then Art asks an awkward question and Fern clears her throat before saying, “Yes. Well. About that. I haven’t formally asked Rudy if I can stay in his room but I have been spending a lot of time in there. I don’t think he will mind too much if I bunk with him.”

A mischievous smirk ticks the corners of lips upward as she starts to plot ways of telling Rudy he has a new roommate.


"Fern"

Fern was such a decisive and headstrong girl, he really should have known that she had an idea of what she wanted as her place in the Hallows. Artorias gave a curt nod of his head when she requested to be a warrior like him and his brother. "Very well, then a Knight you shall be," he declared. Following the gray-furred paw towards the sword he'd driven into the ground, she explained that she wanted to learn how to fight with a sword, and then in the same breath asked if he would teach her how to use one. Artorias blinked in surprise, so stunned by her ask that he completely glossed over the fact that she'd called him by his nickname. Not that it would have mattered, of course, but it did go a long way to show she was feeling more comfortable around the Hallowed wolves.

"You want to learn to sword fight?" he asked, repeating her request for clarity. No wolf had ever asked him to teach them to use a weapon before, and as far as he knew, he was the only wolf around that made use of such tools. He'd been mocked and ridiculed for it, and each time he'd thoroughly thrashed those that had teased him—well, all except for Oxx. But that would be rectified sooner or later. "If that is what you want, we can begin your training as soon as you're ready. We'll start with training swords, work you up to using real steel. The castle armory is teeming with weapons I've been restoring, or we could ask our friends in the Armada to forge you one of your own." This was not a commitment to be taken lightly, and Artorias would be a tough but fair mentor. He expected the best from his wolves and would do all he could to help sharpen their mettle to get them there. But Fern... she would be the first he'd actually take as an apprentice of his combat style. It was thrilling... and a little intimidating.

Fern smirked and unabashedly mentioned that although she hadn't asked Rudyard officially, she didn't think he'd mind if she spent her nights in his room. Artorias gave a bark of laughter and grinned from ear to ear. Oh boy, was his brother about to be in for quite a wake up to what a relationship entailed! "I had a feeling you'd say that. Very well. I'm sure he's already shown you where your room will be then. Make yourself comfortable, that space is now yours as well." Artorias stepped away from Fern to grab the hilt of the sword in his jaws again, pulling the sword from the earth in a flashing arc of steel. "We'll start your training as soon as you're ready," he spoke from around the sword in his mouth, a practice he'd had to learn over time. "In the meantime, you have a flower and some good news to go tell Rudy!" He shot Fern a wink before walking off to stow the sword back in the armory. Oh, how he missed his sword...

- exit Artorias -

"Artorias Carpathius"