The Warlord paced along the parapet, occasionally glancing out at the expansive view beyond. A sense of deja vu encasing him. He had stood not far from here the first time he had goaded Artorias. When he had attempted suicide by angsty teenager. The gloom and anger that had clouded him then had surged forward once more. Each passing day took him further and further from her. Until the scent of her had already begun to fade from the things she had held in life.

Would the youngest of their children forget the face of their mother?

He swallowed past the burning sensation in his throat. It was becoming far too common. He was discovering that the more he swallowed back his anger, the more his grief grew. It seemed if he could not find rage, then he would find sadness instead. He felt hollow and empty, aching with the missing parts of himself.

He turned, and repeated another circuit of passing, pausing as a familiar face came into view. “Briar.” He said, voice colder than he’d intended it to be. He had come out here to be alone. The sight of his children reminded him too much of Zee. and Briar… Briar especially, he had once called his little Zeelet. His eyes strayed to the scar beneath her chin. Flicking there, then away again. “Thank you. I hear you fed the children this morning” He said, his voice quiet.


"Speech"

Things had certainly been lively around the castle immediately following the birth of her children—not all for pleasant reasons, but lively all the same. It felt like she hadn't had a moment to really pause since they were born. Of course she had kind of expected as much considering just how large their litter had been and didn't underestimate how full her paws would be because of that, but the very sudden death of her mother and the fact that they were now playing host and partial caretakers of her youngest siblings was something that she hadn't been expecting to juggle was well. She had taken on the responsibility without a second thought, but she was most certainly exhausted by the end of the day after taking care of her own pups, her siblings, and still tending to the pack as a whole. Artorias had already experienced and pulled her back from her breaking point and she did feel better after getting to vent some of her grief with him, but she knew she needed to check with her father and see what the plan ultimately would be.

After the pups had all had their breakfast and were let loose to have their day of adventures within the safety of the Hallow's borders, she went in search of her father. She found him pacing along one of the castle's parapets and she paused as she peeked around a corner at him and watched him for a moment. She had experienced and comforted him through his grief once already and had hoped to never have to do so again after her mother returned, but here they were. She lifted a paw to rub over the small scars that marred her throat as she sighed quietly, gathering her thoughts before she stepped out into view and walked over to join him at the parapet. "Dad," she greeted simply in response, her ears flicking slightly at the coldness of his tone. She understood why—it was the same reason why Andromeda had mistaken her for their mother just the other day—but it still bothered her slightly. She nodded to confirm what he had heard and replied, "Of course, you don't have to thank me. It's easy enough to include them in on the meal times with our pups." She gave him a curious glance and asked, "How are you doing?" even though she felt like she already knew the answer and it felt silly to even ask.

"Briar Carpathius"

The Warlord let his eyes settle on the younger wolf before him. It was hard to push past the deep well of grief inside of him. It was hard to look at Briar, at the youngest children still in his care. To look at them and see them for exactly who they were, and not who he missed. He knew himself well enough to know the precipice of emotions inside of himself. Grief and rage in constant war. “I don’t intend to leave you to pick up the pieces, sweetheart. You deserve better than that… but I’m glad you're here for them” He said softly. He didn’t look at the scar again. Its presence was a guilty reminder of mistakes it was all too easy to make.

He shook his head at her question. He didn’t have an answer for her, as he hadn’t had one for Andy. “Have the pups said much to you, about how they are processing it?” he asked instead.


"Speech"

Briar was careful to not let her disbelief show on her face as her father insisted that he didn't intend to leave her to pick up the pieces and bit her tongue to keep from saying anything to the contrary. She had witnessed how he had behaved and reacted when they had only suspected that her mother had been killed the first time, had seen how that grief had made him crumple and how so much had fallen on Aslatiel's shoulders, so she wasn't all that surprised when she found herself stepping in to care for her youngest siblings more often than not. She didn't resent him for it and she didn't hold any ill will toward him because of it. She was just as glad that she had be ability and the resources at her disposal to help and she confirmed as much as she nodded to his mention of it as well. She knew that she likely wouldn't have been much better if something were to suddenly happen to Artorias and she likely would have to lean on her family and his as much as she could to weather the storm. Still, she couldn't make herself fully believe that she wasn't here to at least hand the pieces back to him to put together.

She hadn't really expected much of an answer to her question, but as his concerned daughter she felt like she had to ask. When he in turn questioned her about how her siblings were processing everything that happened, she sighed softly and gave a small shrug. "Not many of them have really talked to me about it," she admitted. "I guess I've mostly just tried to help keep their lives running as normal as much as I can so I'm not sure if they really understand or grasp what's happened. They know she's gone, but the why is a harder question to answer." She sighed again and gave a small shake of her head, glancing away to look off the edge of the parapet. "Andromeda is the only one that I've really talked to about it in any real detail and I know she's struggling with it. I can't imagine any of them are doing much better."

"Briar Carpathius"

The Warlord grimaced in agreement. Explaining the permanence of Zee’s departure from their lives was very difficult. Especially when he didn’t want to believe it himself. “It’s going to take some time for it to heal.” He agreed softly. For all of them. Briar seemed to be handling it the best, and he winced at the thought that her first death might have helped to prepare Briar for this one.

“I’ll keep them here for a little bit longer. This branch of our family is gentler, and more able to help them heal, I think.” He said, acknowledging Briar’s own hand in that. In the life she had created her. When he took them back to the Armada, he hoped they’d be better prepared to face their future. He was able to think a little more logically... this time. Had her 'first' death helped prepare him? The thought threatened to break his heart.

"Speech"