Both Vanille and Arcturus seemed to be diligent in their work with the pack, maybe Vanille moreso. If she thought too hard on it she was failing on getting to know Arc's family while they would be the closest thing she felt like family. It was just a part of her nature to feel out of place it seemed. Stay out of the way, best way not to embarrass herself or catch any harsh feelings she supposed. Maybe they'd at least like her hard working spirit. Maybe none of it was that way, but it was the way her mind worked. Her and Arc had been together for quite some time now, but she was still stuck in this loop of some kind of acceptance. It was easy to forget all her troubles when they were together. Otherwise they were almost always on her mind.

Once her and Arc met for the night she quickly nestled into the den and between his arms, her back against his chest and gently clasping around one of his paws. Maybe he could tell how dependent she was on him just by these moments, though she had told him before how scared she was to ever lose him. A mutual feeling with what had happened in their own separate lives. She had been holding back from him and maybe he could feel that too. There was a lot of doubt on her end. But she had to learn how to just live life and let go. It wasn't easy for her. Steps in the right direction maybe, but she was at a stalemate. With what she thought was expected of her, or how Arcturus felt about her in the end. Doubt. Hopefully one day the plague would be lifted off her shoulders.

"Arc & Vanille"

Coming back to the den at the end of the day was always the highlight of his routine and the thing that encouraged him to follow through with all of the work he had taken on around the pack. Of course he was proud to be able to help his uncle with Valta and do his part to keep everyone safe and fed, but really he was mostly just here to keep the remnants of his family together and to give Vanille a real home. If it hadn't been for her and the way she gave him a reason and purpose he wasn't sure if he could have managed to fall into this "normal" life without her. Now he had a routine and someone to look forward to coming home to each day. That sinking feeling that things had been going too well for too long was hard to shake at times, but every time he fell asleep with Vanille tucked into him helped lessen that feeling each day.

As usual, they finished up their daily chores and came back to the den they shared. After an easy dinner, he flopped into their spacious bed first and smiled a bit as he immediately lifted his foreleg with every expectation that Vanille would land there without needing to ask. He wasn't disappointed and after a beat her much smaller frame was settled in against his own and he slipped both of his forelegs around her to pull her back into his chest with his back to him. It was easy to curl around her and he tipped his muzzle down to kiss the top of her head before he nestled into the soft furs of their bed with a contented sigh, giving her a gentle squeeze as her paws clasped one of his own.

"Arc & Vanille"

She felt like life was perfect just like this. She couldn't imagine being any happier. As much as she seemed a little more quiet and serious, at heart this was everything she wanted. Arc treated her so well, never expected anything of her. All of her anxieties were self nourished and maybe a little delusional. And it all seemed to melt away when she was wrapped up in him when the nights came.

Her cheek brushed against the inside of his arm, she was subtle and ready for sleep really. It took a few moments of silence to surround her, but soon she was shifting to turn into him. Eyes still closed for a fast moment like she was just getting comfortable, but her light eyes opened gently to look up at him. She did like to be close with him, to cuddle and be cuddled. That sense of security around her was all she needed. She was less when it came farther than that. It's where she held herself back. A part of her that wanted to give him everything, and another that was scared to keep going. She didn't know if he was still awake, so maybe she was only speaking to herself. Not something he didn't know, but maybe not something she said very often. "I love you, Arc." In a faint whisper but meant all throughout. She didn't know where she would be without him today. With someone else, or still alone. She also couldn't believe that it could get much better than this.

"Arc & Vanille"

Arc settled and relaxed more and more as he and Vanille snuggled together as was their usual routine, his eyes slowly closing as his lids grew heavier. There had been a time that sleep had been very hard to come by and had been something he had avoided out of fear of the nightmares he would have, but those days were long gone. Vanille's presence was enough to reassure him of where he was and kept him grounded here instead of letting his thoughts slip away to the past. Each day that he woke up with her still in his embrace strengthened the belief that she was truly going to be with him for the rest of his days and that was a powerful feeling for someone that had felt so adrift for so long.

He was hovering on the edge of sleep when he felt Vanille shift and roll to face him, causing his forelegs to naturally shift and hold her a little tighter without actually pulling him out of his tentative slumber. What did pull him back from his sleep and get him to reopen his eyes was her soft whisper that was still almost hard to hear despite the silence of the den around them. He blinked open his eyes and tipped his head down to look at here where she was pressed into the thick fluff of his chest, his sapphire eyes heavy lidded as a little smile pulled at his lips. "I love you too," he whispered back in a quiet rumble, one of his massive paws starting to gently rub her back.

Despite his better judgement, he allowed himself to dip his head a little lower so that he could tenderly press his lips to hers for just a moment. There had been so many moments in their time together where he thought their affections were leading them further, but they had stopped short. He would never push Vanille for more and was perfectly content waiting until she was ready, but it did make him hesitant at times to delve into any kind of affection beyond their usual cuddles like this at night when he was going to have her pressed into him like this. He let his kiss linger for just a moment before he pulled back again, giving her another smile and squeezing her gently before he started trying to wind down to sleep once more.

"Arc & Vanille"

As the time had passed it would feel like forever to her if only really just a few moments. She had found herself into the comfort of his embrace easily again. But the urging feeling that she was not giving him enough was there. Was there something wrong with her? She could wonder. Maybe it was normal to feel this way, maybe in some ways he felt the same too. But as they kept coming to this even unspoken standstill her mind would step before her own paws.

She laid there as Arc rested again, ready to happily go back into his sleep with her pressed against him. Gentle breaths, barely moving a muscle for those few forever moments. And in time he may have felt some sort of relief in her tense form. Paws had gently ran along the front of his chest in the most subtle ways maybe almost seeming like a way to calm herself into her own sleep. Her intentions laid somewhere else but it was hard for her to take the leap. She was scared to take them further but she was also scared not to. Maybe tonight would be the night she broke herself. Hopefully Arc would never see it like that.

Small paws made their way downwards, her eyes closed in the dim night of the den but she used all of her other senses to push her forward. Maybe that helped. She didn't want to ask, she didn't want to say anything. She just wanted to do. Maybe he understood. Soon her paws were rubbing along the thin skin of his stomach, so unnatural in the ways he may have known her but gentle as she was. Everything just kept moving slow. Not a bad thing, and it was a long time coming at this point.

"Arc & Vanille"

Arcturus laid with his large forelimbs wrapped snuggly around Vanille as they had so many nights before, closing his eyes while he tried to steady his breaths and put his mind away from the lingering thoughts and desires that he always let simmer down into the back of his mind again. His love and care for Vanille was so far beyond any physical desires so he held no resentment for the fact that they hadn't done anything past this close cuddling and gentle affections. Besides, it was something he had never experienced so he truly didn't know what he was missing out on besides what he had heard from others. Expecting for their usual dance of unspoken thoughts that eventually settled into sleep, he tried to settle his breathing into long, heavy breaths while he waited for Vanille to fully relax into him.

However, the gentle movement of her paws against the thick fur on his chest that usually proceeded her drifting off to sleep never really stopped and instead began to move lower and lower along his chest and down to his stomach and below. His gray ears perked a bit with the surprise of it, the muscles along his stomach flexing and his breath catching slightly under her unexpected touch. His eyes blinked open once more, peering down at the small, delicate figure of her pressed into his much larger frame in the dim moonlight that spilled in through the den's entrance, watching her with uncertain and rapt attention. His paws rubbed gently along her back again as he rumbled softly, "Vanille..." He didn't want to interrupt her or stop her if she was trying to cross some kind of threshold for herself, but he didn't want her to feel as if he expected anything from her either.

"Arc & Vanille"

Her name in his voice rang through her ears like a sweet and gentle song, it wouldn't make her hinder her movements and intentions, but there was still that part of her that wasn't ready. The part that never would be. Soft paws continued that gentle brush against the sensitive skin of his stomach keeping her gaze mostly down or closed into the familiar warmth of chest. All new to her, but just as sweet.

She was careful as she wandered into even more unknown territory, but Arcturus made her feel welcome to keep trying and go deeper even without words. This would not be the best as she tested the waters, but surely one of the ones she would always remember.  Shy as he had always known her to be, she'd struggle to keeping pushing herself, maybe in just the most subtle movements would she get him to roll over so she could lay on top of him. She'd still need his help to get past the barriers. She was too emotionally attached to him to just take as she could. It had to be a joint effort for her to have the whole experience and get past her fear.

"Arc & Vanille"

As Vanille's paws continued to roam and drift into even more unknown territory, he did nothing to hinder her and let her move, explore, and experience at her own pace. His paws rubbed gently along her back and he kissed across the top of her head between her ears occasionally for encouragement. He wasn't sure what had finally motivated her to try to do more with him, but he was glad for it. Every touch sent little electric sparks across his skin and as she reached parts of him that no one else had experienced he couldn't help the quiet groan that escaped him in response. He was just as inexperienced in all of this as she was so if she did anything "wrong" he wouldn't have known any different regardless. Everything felt like wonderful electricity to him as she tested the waters and allowed him to begin understanding why this kind of intimacy was so sought after.

If he hadn't been so turned into what Vanille was doing and hanging on every little movement from his love, he might have missed the very shy and subtle attempts from her to get him onto his back, but he picked up on it after a few moments and was more than happy to oblige. He held her a bit more tightly so he could support her as he rolled in order to bring her along and place her on top of him. Laying like this made their tentative steps toward their first time feel so much more real and he looked up at her with appreciation and love. He knew how difficult this had been for her to approach and that effort wouldn't go unnoticed. His large paws roamed lightly down her sides and along her hips, giving her hips a gentle squeeze. "I love you," he rumbled quietly again. "And I'll forever love you no matter what you do or don't do."

"Arc & Vanille"

She couldn’t fully relay the feelings of soft static he felt on his end, she was really scared out of her mind. She knew he’d keep supporting her, just like she felt she could be wholly open to him. As much as her emotional feelings took over her, he was still her safe space. Even if she couldn’t open her mouth to tell him exactly what she was feeling.

She knew what she did felt right, physically for him and somehow building their bond together stronger. It wasn’t rocket science, but it truly felt this was where she belonged each moment she pushed herself. If it wasn’t Arc she felt like it would be no one for the rest of time. Words of encouragement even for her to stop, she wouldn’t pause in the slightest. She could feel his words through her body, and maybe he could feel that subtle change in her passion. She’d move up for a long gentle kiss, not stoping the slight moves of her body and paws against him not in foreign territory as they were before but still with the hidden intention. It took her a few moments to build up her own drive, to prepare herself. The leap was hard, the way she felt about Arc is what would push her over the edge. Careful in the way she lined them up together and pushed herself onto him in ways she never had before. She stopped before going all the way, looking up to him with eyes filled only with true passion for him, "I love you too." In a whispered in the moment breath. She was slow as she moved forward, using all of his own reactions to her advantage as she adjusted to the new overpowering feelings they created. The fear would fade, and she’d never had expected their night to end like this.

"Arc & Vanille"

Perhaps it was all of the times that they had come so close and had not crossed this boundary that made him doubtful that they would this time, but as she looked at him with a passion that he had not yet seen in her light pink gaze he realized this time there was no stopping. He returned her kiss and felt the intention behind her affections, hearing her love for him in a whole new way. He did nothing to inhibit her nor push her forward as he waited with bated breath beneath her, his large paws resting gently on her hips while his claws lightly scratched encouragingly across her skin. Then, all at once, she pressed back into him and joined them together for the first time. Their den was filled with the baritone rumbles and moans he made in response, his paws and hips encouraging her motions while his gaze never left her face, a look of pure, passionate love burning in his sapphire gaze.

His paws roamed across her sides, back, and down to her hips and thighs, worshiping her in a way he had never gotten the chance to do before as she finally allowed him to love her in the ways he had wanted to for so long. He was no more experienced than she was, but he realized as they figured these things out together that this fact made this moment even more beautiful. She was his first love in every regard and, should he be so lucky, she would be his only love for the rest of his days. "Vanille..." he groaned as he gripped her hips a little tighter, giving himself over to every sensation and feeling they created together, quickly loosing himself to all of it, but he made sure to bring her along with him as they reached that peak together for the first time.

Slowly he eased down from that high and his body began to relax into an unbelievable floating feeling that put a goofy grin across his face while he caught his breath. His forelegs gently wrapped around her and pulled her back into his chest when all was said and done, remaining on his back with her laying across his chest like her pillow. He kissed the top of her head and then across the bridge of her nose and her cheeks, peppering her with tender, loving kisses while he hugged her close till he finally reached her lips and gave her a longer, lingering kiss. "That was amazing..." he rumbled quietly with a little chuckle, nuzzling her cheek affectionately with a silliness that he was now sure could only be felt in this post sex high he was currently in.

"Arc & Vanille"