It was the second raid in a row that they'd come at her, trying to well and truly do harm.  She's also not used to being out without Modesty, without Gilgamesh.  Being sent to go with the younger parts of the roster, helping herd and support them... it was supposed to be fine.  It was supposed to be alright.  What the pet had only now come to realize?  Separation anxiety was a bitch.  Raid outcome be damned, Jael's feelings on return are near single minded.  

Quick to return to their home, to her own bed, Jael would be far happier with Modesty tending her wounds once she was settled with the rest of the pack.  Sakana had bigger fish to fry.  Exhaustion gripping her to the bones, Jael is quick to stumble through the door of their treehouse upon their return.  

“Speech.”

coded by NachoMumma

Somehow, Modesty managed to drag herself back up to the treehouse. Jael's scent was fresh in the home and her heart broke all over again. She moved quickly to the smaller woman, carefully checking over her injuries with a click of her tongue and a growl low in her throat. When would karma catch up with these bastards that demanded payment in blood for what? A dark storminess was roiling at the back of her mind, wheels already set in motion with her earlier delivery to the pack. Resolve was already hardening any soft edges that been allowed to remain, turning them to razors instead. If monsters were what they saw, then monsters they would become.

She curled gathered their store of healing supplies and wordlessly curled around Jael, protective and gentle as she set about the task at hand. She had to tell her too, she had to know, but there was a rock in the back of her throat, choking, drowning, leaving the leader shaking, breaths short, shallow, sharp. Sharp like her eyes. "Gil tried to give Ethne an out." He'd been vague about the how or why, "Ken... followed him. Saw him die. It was six wolves and a bear on one." Who could survive those odds? Not her, not Ken, not anyone. "Ken saw his father go limp, he did the smart thing for the first time in his life. He ran away." Why was the world blurry? It felt like the tree was quaking with the weight of her grief, or maybe that was just her own sobbing? There was still a job to do though, a pack to lead, a follower to heal. She couldn't come apart. Not now, not ever. She had to get it together.

"speech"

Jael can hear Modesty's footsteps as she comes up the steps, tail wagging at her haunches as she does. Pressing up on her elbows, leaning to lap at the woman's muzzle for just a moment. Eyes wide on her face, though the grim expression isn't lost on her. Drawn... and her breath ragged, though she's still careful to tend Jael's wounds.

The revelation? The pet goes stiff, then dizzy. A ragged sob wrenches free from her throat, from her chest. It comes on quickly. Things crashing down around her, and she's unsure if she wants to scream or be sick. Instead, her mouth opens and closes, again and again, for a good few moments. Grasping, though nothing comes out. They'd killed him. They'd killed him. Shock, fear, grief-- they crash over her, one after another, with no signs of stopping.

She can't breathe.

Raggedly, she clings to Modesty's shoulder. To her side. Cheek pressed against her shoulder, wounds forgotten. Jael's entire body aches for far different reasons. Hiccupping through the sobs, there's no way for her to get the words together. "Modesty... what... what do we do?" The words are quiet, through tears, pressed into her shoulder.

Jael's head is noisy. They had to grieve, Ethne had to pay, and what of Jael? She's left feeling more vulnerable, more exposed than ever. Curling ever-closer to Modesty, Jael clings. She's all the pet has left, at this rate.

Were she feeling more herself she might notice that her heart wasn't the only one that was breaking, broken in this moment. She pulls Jael closer, holds her tighter, holding onto the only thing keeping her moored to the physical plane in this moment in time. Her children were caught up in their own battle with the black dog that stalked the Ravine and while she liked to think they'd know to seek her out if she was needed, in her heart she knew they were beyond that. But Jael was here, she was real and though everything felt so numb she could still feel Jael's heart beating alongside hers.

Modesty lifts a paw across Jael's shoulder, pulling her closer yet, teeth mindlessly combing through the fur at the base of her skull. A low warning growl is offered in response to her question, not for Jael, no, but for the Ethne wolves that were only here in ghost form. "I've raised a bounty on the bear, and for those that maim the Ethne wolves. They had the chance to right their wrongs. Siduri has asked for the right to go for the leader. I won't deny her that." The anxiety that decision alone was causing her had her shifting her weight across Jael, possessive, and almost mindless to her injuries. They were all leaving her, weren't they? She wasn't enough. But she wouldn't let this one get away too.

"speech"

Shifting on her side, pulling close to Modesty's neck. It's the only semblance of comfort, the only shelter from the storm that grips her head. Her chest. At war with the grief as it reaches in and clutches her heart, bare-handed. Jael can only whimper as she presses ever-closer to Modesty. Close isn't close enough. Each needs the other right now.

Possessive. Modesty's weight over her, shifting atop her. She doesn't balk to it, wrapping ever-closer to the woman. Whimpering from the pain in her chest, as it eclipses any injuries from the raid. Breaking, where she slumps against Modesty. Jael's voice is small, shaking, when she finally speaks. "I... I need to go get him. They don't get to decide what happens to his body, or be the last ones to touch him." Her tone is fierce, bitter, the words punctuated by a sob.

Hurt, grief, pain-- all of it welled up inside the dog. Clinging to Modesty like she's all Jael has left... because she is. It's just the two of them now. Gaze wide, watery, pleading, she looks up at Modesty. Everything hurts.

It's as if she can see herself from outside her body. The grief and horror give way to something darker as Jael pleads to go and get him. Modesty can't risk it, won't allow it Not yet, not now. She sees the dark look in her own eyes, feels more that hears the growl that makes her whole body visibly quake, limbs stiffening, teeth bared and eye whites flashing a warning. Like a dog guarding a bone.

It wasn't Jael's fault, and Modesty knew if she let the little wolfdog spiral it'd come back to those damn chickens. Biting back on her molars, a slow inhale through her nose and a slow exhale, still barely contained tension. She unclenches her jaw enough to lick her own nose through tight lips, a worried sound leaving her chest unbidden. She feels herself loosing grip, her voice is hoarse. "Scald will lead a party... I don't want to lose y... don't go..."

Teeth combed desperately through the thick fur around Jael's neck, pulling her closer again. She had to show her why she needed to stay, and Modesty didn't have the words. Maybe in the morning her mind would change, but not now.

-fade-

"speech"