Bellamy has rested within Ethne, but unrest still eats at her. More and more, she questions if Haydee should have just tossed her out the first time. The wolves of Ethne, though she loves them, are… biased. Biased toward her for raising the pack and trying to be a leader for them. But it is her teachings and her instability that has landed the pack in hot water not once, but twice now. The woman places the blame on herself, and because of that she leaves Ethne behind. She leaves in the dead of night, praying that her family will not wake and stop her from seeking the opinion of a wolf she believes will be unbiased. Artorias had once shared her views on the world… but since losing Gavroche, Bellamy knew she had become lost more so than ever before.

She wanders, waiting until the sun has risen before she arrives at the borders of the Hallows. The woman bears no weapon, no cloak, nor are there companions at her side. A sigh passes her lips. The pack of Ethne would have been justified in getting their chickens back… but the fact the birds had been culled should have been the end of it. They should have gone. Ears fell against her head as she looked back toward the pack she had raised. They were never made to be lawful, never made to be purely “good”... but now she feared what the world would see them as…

…and it was her fault.

Bellamy sits and lifts her head, calling for Artorias. He was going to be the first of several alphas she wished to seek out in all this… Artorias, Corbie, Manea and her daughter Avacyn… each of them deserved to know the truth and her side of things... and to know that she saw herself in the wrong. And should any of them choose to cast judgment on her for it they had that right. She wouldn’t fight them… that… that was the whole point of leaving her advantages behind. From what she could tell the loss of self only happened on battlefields with multiple opponents… but what if that were to change? Her gaze, thoughtful and troubled, falls to her paws.

Divinities… what a mess all this was.

"Speech," 'Thought.'

Artorias had not seen Bellamy since the day she had left the care of the Hallows to return to her family. When she had checked out as a patient, she had been stronger, more herself than she had been since her mate's death, and the Aegis had been so pleased to see her returning to the indomitable wolf he had known. Now, in the wake of the trials and tribulations that Ethne had faced as of late, Artorias couldn't help but wonder and worry about his fellow alpha. Haydée had expressed her own concerns about her mother's wellbeing and the stresses of leading a pack and he feared that same stress might undo the work she had put into herself. Now, as the dust began to settle around the Austral packs, Artorias found himself at the head of what he feared might devolve into total war. The world that had once seemed so stable and balanced now felt as if it danced on the precipice of chaos and collapse. Like a powder keg waiting for a single spark to ignite its fury.

Heavy thoughts weighed on a heavy mind. They kept the Carpathian from restful sleep that night. When dawn began to break over the southern continent, Artorias rose and began his early morning routine as he always did. Kiss his wife in her sleep, don his armor and sword, and relieve the night watch for his patrol. Walking the eastern border, the Aegis turned his steely gaze out to the woods that had once been the home of Norad—now silent and lifeless in the wake of the Syndicate. He scowled as he passed the tree line and continued his way around his home. As he neared the southern borders, a call for him in a familiar voice raised his attention and his spirits. Bellamy. The brute picked up the pace, his walk now a spirited lope as he closed the distance toward where she waited for him. Art arrived some minutes later, and when he saw her, he immediately knew he wasn't the only one who had been losing sleep lately. Bellamy looked tired. The kind of weariness that weighed down one's soul from fate shoveling too much shit upon it at once. Artorias knew the feeling all too well...

The Aegis approached the bare leader of Ethne and dipped his head in quiet reverential greeting as he came to sit on his haunches before her. Haydée had told him about her actions and behavior during the raid on their home. She had mentioned going back to talk to the Raiders. His guards had seen Ethne wolves march northward across the Bifröst, presumably to retaliate for their lost fowls. The fact that Bellamy was sitting here like this told him things had probably not gone to plan. "You look like you've seen some shit," he observed with gentle jest, offering Bellamy a half smile, hoping to provoke any kind of reaction on her dour visage. "I'm guessing you're not here to shoot the breeze, huh?" Whatever Bellamy needed of him, she knew that Artorias would give it freely if it was within his power to. Even if it was just a shoulder to cry on.

"Artorias Carpathius" | "Carpathian" | "Corbin" | "Eira" | "Argent"

One big happy family

Artorias has two ravens named Corbin and Eira and a fox named Argent. Assume they are within calling distance at all times.
As his mate, Briar may enter Artorias' threads unless marked Private.
____________________

Artorias arrives, and his jest pulls the slightest chuckle from the woman’s lips. “I feel like I’ve done some shit, too.” The words are lighter than she expects, given the troubled state she has been in. Still, Bellamy sighs, and tilts her head slightly to the side as she addresses the man now. “You are one of the few wolves outside my kin, outside my pack, that has seen me at my lowest… You have seen the state of my mind, and how… different it can be.” Her brow furrows and the troubled look within her gaze grows.

“I fear there is another affliction… one that I hadn’t considered since the last time it had occurred…” How does she explain this? What is the best way? Bellamy closes her eyes, brow furrowing as she tries to come up with the right description. “Battlefields, alongside allies… they begin to shift and change… like memories of battles past playing out all at once. Faces and environments change, melding into one another… I’m… not quite present in the present.” The old wolf open her eyes again as another sigh passes her lips.

“The first time we became aware of this… I was a younger wolf. About the age my youngest are now.” Bellamy explains. “I maimed someone during a raid… It was as if the only thing I could remember was fight or die.” Bellamy’s gaze fell. “Acere, the alpha I was under, tried to comfort me. I was… in a heightened state. Still frazzled by the time it was all over. This happened again, recently… only…” Her claws bit into the soil.

“A child had been the one to approach me. Not even a yearling yet… I… I barely remember going for her… but I did… and she was maimed in the process.” Her posture, tone, and expression betrayed the guilt behind the action. “And now… now my daughter is suffering for my sin… The leader of the Raiders attacked her, maimed her over what I had done…” Bellamy scoffed.

“I had… asked Haydee to send me away… to allow me to go seek the punishment that I had earned…” The woman explained. “But not only did she not do that… she promoted me back to co-Leader alongside her… and then the retaliatory raid to get the chickens back… Divinities above Artorias I feel like all my lessons and actions are going to cause the crash of Ethne around me…” Bellamy lifted her gaze back to him.

“I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like every action I take now will only make things worse...” She trailed off, praying that the man might have some advice.

"Speech," 'Thought.'

Artorias is pleased to see Bellamy is still in the mood to crack self-deprecating jokes, and he chuckles along with her. She honors him by deigning him one of the few wolves beyond her family to know of the struggles she went through. Artorias nodded; he had watched how she'd suffered to grief and watched how she'd risen above it. As she continues on to explain the quirks of her mind, the Lord of Cinder listens closely, all attention paid to his guest while she sought out the words she wanted to say. The affliction she described of her mind sounded all too familiar to Artorias. They sounded just like the symptoms he had watched his late mother suffer through just before her demise. It brought a concerned frown to the man's lips, brow furrowing as he continued to listen quietly.

Artorias gave Bellamy all the time she needed to tell her story to him—of her first instance of losing herself in battle, of the latest instance where a child had been harmed. Yes, Art knew of what had occurred at the first Ethne-Raiders raid. Haydée had informed him of it, though he did not give away his knowledge. He did not want to put Bellamy in the position of feeling embarrassment for his prior knowledge, especially given how much strength it took her to say to him here and now. He could see the guilt in her eyes, in her body language. She was remorseful for the damage done, but remorse did not mend, it only destroyed the one possessing it. Bells filled him in on the outcomes that followed—Haydée's maiming trying to settle the matter, her request to go find the punishment herself, her daughter's refusal and the subsequent raid that had also gone poorly in Ethne's favor, and finally to her guilt surrounding the future of Ethne.

A deep sigh slipped past the alpha's lips as he considered the circumstances Bellamy found herself in. They were... certainly not good. But he did not think they were as bleak as she made it out to be. "Ethne has found itself in quite the debacle..." he agreed with a pensive nod of his head, leaning back to rest on his haunches. "Do you want my thoughts on the matter, or would you prefer I be an audience to release your emotions and speak your mind to?" Artorias would give Bellamy whatever she desired—if it was an ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on, he would support his fellow alpha without judgment or scorn. If she wanted his insight, he would be happy to offer it to her, but he would not do so unsolicited. Bellamy had to want it for it to matter.

"Artorias Carpathius" | "Carpathian" | "Corbin" | "Eira" | "Argent"

One big happy family

Artorias has two ravens named Corbin and Eira and a fox named Argent. Assume they are within calling distance at all times.
As his mate, Briar may enter Artorias' threads unless marked Private.
____________________

When Artorias spoke, his words were an understatement in Bellamy’s mind. Ethne was deep in a shithole and it seemed no matter what way they turned it was being made worse. As much as the woman wanted it to end, trouble kept finding its way to them. The second raid should have never happened, but Bellamy had been blinded by anger at what had, at the time, felt like an unjust scarring of her daughter. Scarring that she, herself, should have received. A soft sigh left her maw, and the woman let her gaze fall back to Artorias. There is so much worry weighing on her, and guilt, that Bellamy fears it will consume her.

[colo#a8d7be]“I… I think I need your thoughts on the matter. Your opinion of what I should do, Artorias. I want this to end, to clear things up, but I fear any approach between our packs will be seen as nothing but hostile. Haydee made me a leader due to Gilgamesh’s words that she was a poor leader, but hell I wasn’t even sure how to be a leader myself. And I’m not even sure that I should be in the position. I’ve not… done anything with it. I’m not trying to celebrate what has happened.”[/color] The woman shook her head. “I don’t think any of Ethne is… but we keep making the wrong turns… and there is no turning back at this point.”

"Speech," 'Thought.'

Artorias' heart went out for Bellamy. She was a mother trying to do right by her family, her children, her pack. But at every turn, something seemed to go catastrophically wrong. It was almost a comedy of errors, but it was playing out more like a tragedy. Ethne and the Raiders had both done damage to the other, some of it irreparable, and now the cycle of violence was in perpetual motion. Bellamy asked for his advice, his opinion, and he would give it to her. Ironically, it would be the same advice he gave to Haydée not even a season ago when this whole calamity had started.

"You're right. The Raiders hate you. There's been too much damage and bloodshed between both sides to simply walk it back and rewind the clock," Artorias began with an empathetic sigh and a slow shake of his head. His fiery gaze met Bellamy's desperate green eyes. "But that doesn't mean your situation is hopeless—just fragile. Ethne needs to proceed with care. And most importantly, you must do... nothing." Artorias paused to let his words sink in before he began to explain. "Right now, the Raiders are hurt. Their pain is raw and emotions are high. This is no time to try anything diplomatic or try to mend a bridge that is currently burning. You need to let the fire die down, let time pass so wounds can start to heal. Then you can try to make amends and offer good will as a show of remorse. Do not speak to them, do not engage with them, and do not try to help them. The Raiders are a proud people, and right now they feel betrayed by Ethne. Give them time and space, let those furious fires burn down, then consider attempts at reconciliation." This was nothing new. This was the exact same advice he had given Haydée. Maybe Bellamy would listen to his wisdom better than her daughter had. For Ethne's sake, he hoped so...

"Artorias Carpathius" | "Carpathian" | "Corbin" | "Eira" | "Argent"

One big happy family

Artorias has two ravens named Corbin and Eira and a fox named Argent. Assume they are within calling distance at all times.
As his mate, Briar may enter Artorias' threads unless marked Private.
____________________