ardent

ready aim fire



Wren


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06-28-2014, 11:21 AM
#1


That morning the babe felt strangely determined to fight. To get her arms wrapped around something, and her jaws pulling and tearing at scruffs. It was a rather strange feeling, but she knew that's what she wanted. A spar. A fight or practice. If the tall girl ever became a queen or if she ever earned a high rank...she'd need to keep her crown. And to do that she'd need exceptional battle skills. Since Ludicael didn't have any training taking place, she'd train outside the pack. May it be another Ludicael wolf or a complete stranger. She wanted a spar and wanted to see if her inner beast was all that powerful. Unless, of course, a wolf that is a friend of hers approaches. Then she won't be so determined to taste blood...
Wren slowly emerged from her den and stretched her cramped up back, maw splitting into a brief yawn. It was a pretty morning in Ludicael, and she would of loved to stay a little bit to drink in the beauty. But she decided, instead, to be begin her walk to the battlefield. It seemed the territories of her own pack were much warmer and brighter than the neutral territories. Others were quiet and freezing, with her breath visible through the gradually brightening morning air. As she trotted through these areas- she wondered how the weather would be at the battlefield. If it was hot...well, she'd run out of breath quicker, and be slower. If cold, it might numb up her paws and make her grow confused.
Thoughts were cut off as the aroma of dry blood filled her nose. She was here, at the battlefield. It wasn't much better than the other territories. But eh, she'd get used to it. Wren slowly made her way to a clearing and stood at one side, mentally noting to herself that whoever was going to spar with her had plenty of space, as did she. Then the babe threw her head back and released a smooth, pretty song, summoning an opponent. After, she'd sit, waiting to see who'd arrive."Speech"




Desireé

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06-29-2014, 07:53 AM


The Rani would take a stroll away from Covari, Leading herself towards the battlefield, the stench of blood and decay held strongly within the crisp air. Its been a long time since she had trained, and being a secondary means she must be sharp in all skills, especially in fighting in order to protect her home and family. Today she'd do some training, wanting to figure out where she needed to improve. Her soft paws would lead her towards another, the call helping her find the opponent. though as she halted to inspect the woman she kept a fair distance away, incase she made a surprise attack. The Rani would remain Cautious, though eager all the same, its time to begin. "Im guessing your here for the same reason as I? Ill let you take the first move." She'd nod once before setting her defenses, ready for the spar to begin. [short post, sorry<3]

Round 0 of 2?





Wren


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06-29-2014, 09:35 AM
#3


A few minutes after her summoning call, a woman arrived, her coat putting her into a bit of a daze. She's never seen a colorful looking pelt like that- and it made her feel icky that she'd have to tear it up. Well, attempt to tear it up. But this was a spar afterall. Her pretty fur would be torn up to. --- Wren watched with confusion as the girl slowed her pace while approaching, eyeing her as if she was trying to avoid her. So the babe played on a weak smile in order to make her feel a bit more welcomed. Then, that purple woman spoke, allowing her to perform the first move. But also said something the girl could reply to. "Indeed I am, miss. But before we start, I'm Wren Sartaddi." With that, the woman widened her legs and distributed weight to each one, splaying her toes into the moist dirt and making engravings into the earth with her thorned digits. She rolled her shoulders to bunch up the fur on her neck and back, while also bringing her chin down to shield her throat. Finally, her lips curled back into a smooth snarl, and her tail leveled out with her body.
After setting her defenses and making sure everything was complete, she propelled herself forward, legs moving quickly across the ground. Dirt was kicked up carelessly at her heels, until she was only so far away from the purple babe. Her body was moved in dangerously close to the woman, when suddenly she shifted her sharp shoulder forward, aiming to ram it forcefully into the forechest of the purple mistress. By doing this, the woman hoped it would either knock the breath out of the girl, or send her backwards in shock, giving her an opportunity to strike again. If so doing either, she'd swing her body away from her opponets face in order to avoid any jaws around her hips or tail. Then, attempt to lock her jaws around her upper neck, hoping to grab a reasonable amount of flesh. If so, she'd attempt to yank it all downwards, while fixing her paws on the ground so she'd keep her unsteady balence. "Speech"

WREN v DESIREE
one two

DEFENSES weight distributed to each of her paws, head and tail leveled with her spine for balence, chin tucked to protect her throat and forechest, legs widened and bent a bit, shoulders rolled in order to bunch fur, eyes narrowed, toes splayed into the ground, ears laid back against her skull
ATTACKS wren came at desiree and attempted to ram her closest shoulder/left shoulder into her forechest and hoped to knock the breath out of her, or knock her backwards in shock. if doing so, then wren would quickly swing her hindquarters away from desiree's face to avoid any bites there(tail or hips), and then attempt to lock her jaws around a chunk of skin from desiree's upper neck and pull down violently.
INJURIES none yet
NOTES tell me if any of this came out confusing! c:



Desireé

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06-29-2014, 10:30 AM


The Rani would say no more, immediatly putting her defenses in place. Eyes slit, Ears pinned, Tail tucked, Hackles raised, teeth bared, legs spread for balance, claws digging into the ground for a more stable balance, head lowered to align with spine, muscles tensed, chin tooked in to protect throat. Before long Wren would come rushing forward and Desiree would prepare herself for impact, Though as Wrens left shoulder was prepared to meet impact against her chest Desiree would step slightly to the left so that her chest would be out of harms way. Though while doing this Wrens right shoulder would instead hit Desire?'s right shoulder. The Rani had no time to think about the potential bruising and would soon plan out her own attacks. When they had both met shoulder to shoulder Desiree would snap her own cranium around to the right and attempt to clamp her jaws down on the right side of Wrens neck, nearest the top in the hopes of causing irritation and bleeding. If successful desiree would attempt to hold on. Wrens teeth would clamp down on Desire?'s back, not quite getting her neck because of the sidestep which was made at the start.

Desire? would attempt to become in line to wrens right side- hoping to be facing her right shoulder when desiree swivelled her body around very slightly [ letting go of the hold to the neck if it was successful.] If successful des would lower herself closer to the ground, bending her legs slightly while doing so, attempting to go in and bite down on Wrens right front leg, aiming nearest the bottom where it is more fragile to hopefully sprain or even brake a few bones, If this is successful Des would try to keep hold of the leg, in the hopes of unbalancing Wren and to control her leg movements by twisting left and right.

Round 1 of 2 Desiree vs Wren

Defenses: listed in the first paragraph near the top!

Attacks: Des would hope that once she side steps and there shoulders meet, to twist her cranium to the right and hopefully bite down on Wrens neck, nearest to the top, if successful Des would try to keep a hold until moving to become head on with wrens right shoulder. Des would then bend down slightly, hoping to grab wrens right front leg near the bottom, to do some damage.

Injuries: First round.

Notes: I hope this makes sense, there was a lot of movement going on so i didnt really know where to put all the attacks. Especially when wren tried biting Desirees neck, so i tried to fit it in somewhere, hope it made sense. Pm me if anythings confusing!<3





Wren


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06-29-2014, 11:52 AM
#5


Frustration filtered through the woman as she had missed the forechest of the woman. This caused her to nearly loose footing, but she still managed to grab a chunk of skin from her opponent and ram her shoulder forward until it collided with the other girl's. Just from the back, which wasn't as fragile as the neck was. Eyes narrowing, Wren curled her lips back to reveal her ivories yet again, paws fighting to balance herself out again. But as she tried to continue to fix and adjust her defenses, Desiree had gotten ahold of her own neck, causing a pained puff of air to shoot out of her slightly agape maw. But despite the amount of pain vibrating from her neck, the woman continued to pull down on the chunk of flesh from the back of her opponent. Until soon she felt the girl let go of her neck and move her head down. Thinking she'd aim for her fragile ankles, Wren whipped her head around, attempting to lift the paw the woman was aiming for as far upward as she could.
If the woman were to avoid getting a pair of jaws around her ankle, she'd aim to throw her claws down onto the lowered face of the woman. Because she wasn't paying much attention to where she sent her claws- they could of likely landed in the eyes of the girl, the muzzle, or the skull. She might of just missed, as well. Wren, hoping to still have her right paw flattened onto the head of the woman, swung her tall frame around to the left[this being she would have removed her paw] and aimed her jaws down at the scruff of the purple queen. Then, attempting to snap her jaws around the flesh, she would try an yank her to the side. This, if successful, could knock her over or cause damage to her neck. Wren, while hopefully completing all that she tried, continued to narrow her eyes and distribute weight to each of her paws to keep balance. Chin slightly but not completely tucked, and tail curled protectively through her hind legs. "Speech"

WREN v DESIREE
one two

DEFENSES attempting to keep her balance distributed to each paw in order to avoid falling or tripping to easily, ears flattened back against her skull, chin slightly but not completely tucked, legs widened, tail tucked between her back legs(to make sure des doesn't grab it), eyes narrowed, teeth bared ((she's struggling to keep all her defenses set while fighting))
ATTACKS when des had lowered her head to grab hold of wren's ankle/lower foreleg, she had noticed quickly and had lifted her paw, but had attempted to immediately shoot it back down onto des's face(most likely on the muzzle/nose). then, if her paw was still planted upon des's face, she'd remove it and swing her body around, aiming to grab hold of her scruff and yank her in toward her violently.
INJURIES major bite wound located on upper neck, minor bruising on left shoulder
NOTES phew, so much movement xD again, tell me if there is anything confusing




Desireé

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06-29-2014, 01:37 PM


Desire? had little time to think about the injuries that may be caused in this spar; but instead to try and inflict as many wounds as possible on her opponent. Eyes would remain slit, hackles raises, abdomen tensed, ears pinned, tail tucked, teeth bared, adjusting legs to remain balanced, claws dug into the ground, toes spread out slightly, muscles tensed and tail tucked. The bite to wrens neck had been successful, knocking wind from her for just a moment; though as Desire? had tried to snap at the womans right front leg it had not been successful. Instead it had raised up, attempting to slam down on Desire?'s head. The paw would hit her nose, though no injuries seemed to have taken place; or not of what desiree knew of. As wren would turn and charge for the queens scruff the Rani would take a step back and quickly raise her crown up with force, in an attempt to slam under Wrens jaw in the hopes of stunning and bruising. Desire? wouldnt wait long, attempting to close the distance between them and lower her body at the last moment, Desire? would open her jaws and push of the ground, hoping her jaws would snap down on the centre of Wren's neck, not enough to kill but enough to scare and hopefully submit.

Desiree vs Wren round 2 of 2

Defenses: all in first paragraph

Attacks: Desire? would step back just as wren tries going for her scruff. Desire?s crown would shoot up in the hopes of hitting wrens jaw. Once doing this Des would lower herself slightly and push of the floor, aiming to wrap her teeth around Wren to get her to submit.

Injuries: Mild bruising, light hit to nose, bite to back.





The Judge

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06-30-2014, 08:57 PM

Wren vs Desire? for Spar



Round 1
Wren:

1 for clarity- -2 which shoulder is she attack with? -2 swing her body which way? -2 you need to specify where on the chest you're aiming for -2 what side of the neck is she aiming for? How's she planning to position her jaws? -1 what angle is she approaching at?

3 for powerplaying.-3 "Her body was moved in dangerously close to the woman" You need to attempt to close distance, don't assume your opponent let you get close. -4 you need to give your opponent time to respond to your attacks. There was way to much movement in this post. Adding a bunch of "if this then this" statements afterwards can get confusing and isn't fair to your opponent who could move and render all of those things null.

8 for defenses.+1 for each seen

4 for attack.+2 for shoulder throw (-1 for clarity). +2 jaw attack (-1 for powerplay)

10 for injuries.First round

Round one Total: 26/50


Desire?:

4 for clarity--2 "had no time to think about the potential bruising" you need to specify what damage the attack did. -2 general clarity issues, I had a lot of trouble reading through your attacks. -2 how did the side step cause Wren's teeth to fall on Des' back? Where on her back did they land?

6 for powerplaying.-4 give your opponent time to respond to your attacks. You had several jaw attacks in succession both were for holds.

10 for defenses.+1 each one seen

5 for attack.+3 bite to neck +2 bite to foreleg (-1 for powerplay)

10 for injuries.First Round

Round one Total: 35/50

Round 2

Wren:

0 for clarity- -2 more detail is need in the damage that Des attack did. -2 "Wren whipped her head around" which way? -2 which paw is she lifting? you need to say in your post. -1 even if she cant see where her paw is aiming you still need to state where she was hoping to hit -2 which way is she hoping to yank Des? -2 how far did she swing herself to the left? What angle is she at in position to Des?

5 for powerplaying.-3 once again give your opponent time to respond to attacks instead of piling up one on top of the other. -2 you need to attempt to pull down on the chunk of flesh from Des' back. Again she could move and ruin that attack so you can't say it happened for sure.

2 for defenses. +1 for each seen -2 not rebalancing when lifting paw

4 for attack.+2 paw attack (-1 for clarity) +2 jaw attack (-1 for powerplay)

6 for injuries. -3 to major bite wound -1 bruising

Round two Total: 17/50


Desire?:

4 for clarity- -2 which side of her neck? The center of the front of her neck? the left side? right side? -2 how does she swivel her body? which way? -2 what position is Des in in relation to Wren? If your opponent fails to specify you can and should determine the position

4 for powerplaying.-2 " The paw would hit her nose, though no injuries seemed to have taken place"I imagine taking a paw to something delicate like the nose would cause some sort of damage. -2 "lower her body at the last moment " at the last moment assumes the distance was closed. -2 again, a lot of movement and I know you can't help it in response but you don't need to answer each of your opponents attacks with another attack. The multiple attacks with the same body part are the reason for this deduction.

9 for defenses.+1 for each seen

5 for attack. +3 jaw attack +2 headslam

8 for injuries. -2 hit to nose

Round two Total: 30/50



Totals:


Wren: 43/100

Desire?: 65/100



And the winner is...


Desire?! Wren must give up by either submitting, fleeing, or passing out.

Damage:


Wren:- bruising will take a few ooc days to heal, major bite will take 2 ooc weeks


Desire?:- bruising will take a few ooc days to heal, moderate bite will take 1 ooc week


Notes:


For Salmon
There's no need to bold the word attempt. We can read. Powerplaying was your biggest issue, you're trying to fit in too many attacks in succession into one post. This makes it difficult for your opponent to respond and quickly leads to a messy fight. Also work on your clarity. Devils in the details as they say, you need to be specific.


For Luisiana

Good work. I know it's hard responding to lots of attacks but that doesn't mean you need to throw as many back. This affected your clarity and powerplay scores. Remember it's unlikely for a wolf to get in two attacks with the same body part (jaws, etc.) in one round. Work on keeping your movement as succinct as possible.


Thanks guys!

- By [Lunarcat7]