Athena blinked her eyes open as the sunlight filtered in through the entrance of her and Ama's den. She carefully lifted her head and looked down at where Amalia was curled up at her side. An adoring smile spread across her muzzle as she looked at her sleeping form. In the early morning was one of the few moments recently during the day that she could sit and look at her wife for as long as she wanted. Amalia had been working so incredibly hard recently that it had actually been hard to pull her away to the family meeting they had several days ago. She had been afraid that Amalia would work herself sick and sure enough a couple of days ago she hadn't been feeling well. Athena had put her foot down then and forced her wife to stop for a little while and get a good night's sleep. Athena glanced around the den for a moment and wondered if maybe it might not be better to move into a smaller den or maybe even trade with one of their sons. They had originally picked it out and dug it out more to hold the both of them and all four of their large boys, but now that they had all grown up all the extra space just made the den seem lonely. Sure, their sons would stop in from time to time to spend the night, but it still felt a little excessive. With a soft sigh she would turn her attention back to Amalia and dipped her head down to gently nuzzle Ama's neck till the little russet and white woman stirred. Athena smiled again and asked softly, "Hey there, beautiful, how are you feeling?" "talk" 'think' "you"

She hummed softly as the soft nose brushed across her, but her eyes did not open yet. Athena had forced her to sleep once she started to catch a cold, and she knew that there was no point in arguing with her. Amalia was pretty tired anyways, she had been up for so long trying to learn all she can as quickly as possible. The fact that with the start of Spring the chill had not gone away left her really worried, which further caused her sickness to linger. Sighing softly, she curled closer to the gray woman. "Ask me again when I'm awake." she murmured softly, placing a soft lick on the woman's leg. Now that she had been eased into sleep she didn't want to get up, not even with the gentle touches of her wife. No, sleep was good. It was a comfort to be in this soft, warm den with her fluffier and warmer lover. Giggling to herself at the thought, she hid her head under one of Athena's leg. She could feel her mind come out of the grogginess of sleep, but she fought against it. She didn't want to be awake right now! "Just five more minutes!" she whined, but it was obvious that the cling of sleep was gone from her voice. ""

Athena grinned and chuckled at her wife's response, kissing her forehead when she licked her leg. Laying here with Amalia brought her so much contentment. She wished they could spend all of their time like this, just relaxing and poking fun at eachother. Life had thrown them both so many curveballs, but they still had eachother. Amalia whined for five more minutes and Athena laughed lightly. "Sweetheart, you can have as many minutes as you'd like. I'm more than happy to cuddle with you for five, ten, even a hundred more minutes." She buried her face into Ama's scruff and and nuzzled her happily while she breathed in her scent. "With how hard you've been working you deserve to sleep in for as long as you'd like," she commented, smiling and moving her head so she could put those sweet, gentle kisses along the backs of Amalia's ears. "You know I'm proud of you, right?" she asked slightly out of the blue, the thought coming to her as she thought about Amalia's hard work as of late. "Talk" "You" Think

She received a quick kiss on her forehead as an award for her gentle kiss on her leg. It was a little while before Athena spoke again, and she almost fell silent enough to drift back off. But it wasn't long enough before her loves darling voice called out to her again after she whined for more time. She told her that she could have all the time she wanted, causing the tiny woman to curl tighter against Athena. She hummed as her large face dug into her scruff, a pleasurable sigh leaving her maw. Ears pinned back slightly as she brought up how hard she had been working, it had been driving her to a breaking point. She was making herself ill with worry and it almost drove a huge rut between her and her wife. Her thoughts were pulled away with tender kisses on her ears, humming softly as her soft tongue coated the backs of her ears. But when Athena spoke next, her eyes peaked open as she gazed up at her. P-proud? Tears pooled in her dark blue depths, her heart swelling at the words. She had never said it before, and although she had known that her wife was proud of her studies, she had never heard it come from her own mouth. "Y-you are?" she asked softly, disbelieve thick in her voice. How was she happy with the things she was doing? She hardly saw her and the kids anymore, and was catching a cold in the early spring because of it. It had pushed them apart before, nearly drove each other away. "Talk" "You" Think

Athena was honestly a little surprised by her wife's reaction to her question. She peered down at Amalia, spotting those breath-taking blue eyes peeking up at her with a sparkle of tears in them. Her gaze softened as she spoke, curling her body tighter to Amalia's. "Of course I am. I know it's been hard these last couple of months... But you're working so hard and learning so much and I know you're going to do so many great things for this pack with everything you've learned. I'm so proud of you for that. That doesn't mean that I want you to keep working yourself sick,", she smirked a little, poking fun at her hard working wife, "But I do appreciate everything you've been doing."

She smiled and gently nuzzled Amalia's cheek. "You impress me every day with your work ethic and your dedication. I never would have expected to see that little bundle of fur I pulled out of the snow way back then grow up to be such an amazing woman... and such an amazing wife and mother." Athena shifted her body a bit so she was more on her side and could slip her forelegs around Amalia, one around the front of her chest and the other across her shoulders, so she could pull her closer. Amalia was so tiny compared to her own form, but she loved how well her small frame fit into hers. "Please don't feel bad for being so busy, lovely. I'm not going anywhere and neither are our children."

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She felt the tightness of her wife's body curling around her, and the amount of strength and comfort it brought her. She couldn't help but feel so amazed and shocked by this woman, this woman that was all hers. When the grey lady spoke her red ears quivered, pulling forward to try and pick up every single word. A few tears fell, unable to stop them at the kindness in Athena's voice. The tiny girl flinched slightly at her wife poking fun at her pushing herself so hard to the point of sickness, but otherwise reached over to press an adoring kiss on her cheek. "I... I guess I always knew that. But I would have thought that part of you didn't like me for working so hard. I mean I pretty much pushed us apart, and the boys..." she choked on her words, having to stop and swallow hard, "I feel like I have missed so much of their lives. I mean it seems like they all have girlfriends now! Which you know, is not allowed. Nope. Our boys are not allowed to like girls yet." Her voice grew higher in pitch as her head shook frantically. They were growing up way too fast, and it wasn't allowed. She was going to shove them all into a den and lock them in. Snapped back into place by Athena's soft nuzzle, she leaned into the touch. More kind words were spared for her, blue eyes growing damp again. "Oh Athena, I do it all for you, all for our family. You have to know that. Its never been for myself. The reason why I push myself so hard is the nagging fear that something is going to happen to you or the boys. I want to be able to stop it, even when we are old woman." She said with a soft giggle, reaching up to tug lightly on her gray cheek. Amalia stayed still as the larger woman shifted, wrapping her up in a bit hug. A delicate sigh left her pint sized frame, eyes closing and she just let herself be surrounded in her wife's warmth. This is all she truly needed in life, her very life blood was in this den. The scent of their boys was still lingering as well, making Athena's last words even more sweet. It was hard for her to not feel guilty for being away, maybe she was in denial about everyone getting older. Slowly blinking her eyes open, her neck stretched upwards as she fought to capture the woman's two toned gaze. There had been something on her mind for quite awhile, something that she had yet to share with her love. "I... I want more babies, Athena. I know we have our boys and their... friends," much emphasis was placed on that word, "but I want little ones that look like me too. But the thought of being with anyone else but you..." Amalia broke off, the shutter that shook her cutting off all words. "Burn Baby Burn"

Athena couldn't help but giggle when Amalia completely denied that their boys could be liking girls now. She had always faced their boy's aging with more of a realistic view than Amalia did, but she could agree that they were growing up way too fast. It was still funny to hear Ama 'nope' the idea so seriously. Hearing that all her hard work was for her and their family make Athena's gaze soften and a smile come to her muzzle. It reminded her of how hard she had worked herself to strengthen her fighting skills back when she was younger. She had wanted to be as powerful of a fighter as her mother so she could protect her whole family and that sentiment had carried on to her new family of Amalia and her sons. She truly appreciated the sentiment and wished that everyone else could see the strength that Amalia had, Amalia herself included. Athena grinned at her comment about them being old women and nibbled playfully back at Amalia's cheek. She loved the idea of growing old together with her wife. She couldn't think of a single member of her family who hadn't gone out in a blaze of glory or vanished into thin air. Athena wanted to break that trend and leave a long, lasting history here for her wife and her children. Oh how her life had changed since she met Amalia... There had been a time when she wanted nothing more than to be a powerful warrior and a feared alpha, but now her desires and priorities were so much more centered on family and love. After a moment of silence passed between them she felt Amalia's head shift away from her and Athena curiously lifted her head as well to peer down to find Amalia's blue gaze. She seemed to hesitate, but when she spoke her words stopped Athena cold. To hear the words that had been bouncing around in her head for months and months coming out of Amalia's mouth was both a relief and a heartbreak. "Oh Amalia..." she said softly while she tried so hard to search for the right words. "I... I want us to have babies just as badly. I've been trying to figure out how to tell you I wanted children for so long, but I didn't want to hurt your feelings..." Her ears folded back against her skull while her two-toned eyes searched her wife's. "I wish I could give you them, my love... I wish with my whole heart I could... I could give you all of the options and suggestions I've thought up, but at least one of us being with someone is just inevitable if we want children..." She tried to gage Amalia's reactions while she gently placed a kiss at the end of Amalia's nose. She couldn't resist giving her wife little affections and things while they were this close, no matter the subject of their conversations. "Burn Baby Burn"

Everything else was forgotten about when the topic of children came up. She felt Athena tense at her side and Amalia grew nervous, her coloured ears pulling back towards her head slightly. It took her wife awhile to formulate the right words, the pause that lingered between them felt thick and heavy. But apparently she had been thinking the same thing. With their boys getting bigger her drive to have pups again was so strong. But she wanted them to be from her, have her family linage in them. She wanted to pass on her genes as well, but Athena was right. There was no way that they could have that without someone having to be intimate with another one. It made her cheeks burn, tears brimming in her dark blue eyes again. She sniffled and buried her face into the gray woman, her tiny body tense. She wanted it so badly, but she also felt like it would be betraying her wife. Her mind trickled back to the conversation that she had had with her mother, of the ideas that Pip had shared with her. "My Mother did share an idea with me at one point... but I didn't share it with you because I thought that it was absurd. But now..." she pulled back, unmuffling her voice from her wife's fur. "Well she said something about if we wanted to have pups that could hold both our traits, that you would erm... you know... with my brother. Or me with yours." She shuttered at the thought, but it was still an idea after all. It was really the only way that they could have a litter of their mixed genes. Blushing furiously she covered her face again, suddenly dreading anything that Athena would say. "talk" 'think' "you"

Every time she saw tears in her wife's eyes it made her heart break. She never wanted anything to cause Amalia enough pain or heartache to make her cry. She knew that Amalia was more sensitive to things than her in general anyway so it was almost impossible to avoid at times, but the wish was there all the same. She let Amalia bury her face into her fur and for a moment all she could do was hold Ama tightly and let the silence take over the den. She thought that would be the end of it, but Ama spoke again and brought surprise to Athena's face. Mating with each other's brothers had occurred to her. She had literally considered every option under the sun for them to have more children. However, she had never thought that Ama would actually consider it. It surprised her even more that Epiphron had suggested it, but that was a thought she would explore more later. "I had considered that as well..." she stated, her expression growing thoughtful. "It would be... strange, but it is probably the closest we'll get to having pups that are really ours. It's probably our best option..." She hesitated for a moment while she tried to sort out her own emotions. "Amalia, I've already been with someone else because of Vereux. I..." her dark ears folded back and her gaze drifted from Amalia's. "I wish I could be like you and could say that I haven't... I knew we wouldn't have our boys otherwise, but..." Athena sighed and forced herself to bring her two-toned gaze back to Amalia's. "But I can't change what I've already done. I know being intimate with someone else really bothers you and I don't want you to do anything that would make you uncomfortable. Besides... I don't know if I really want to bring Vereux back into our lives for whatever reason. But... maybe we could talk to Leo? If that's okay with you?" She gently nuzzled her cheek, adding, "I'll leave it up to you, my love. If you and your brother agree I will do it." "Talk" "You" Think

Her wife's distress was not lost on her. She knew that it upset Athena to see her upset, but it was hard. She was a very fragile soul, and situations could quickly turn to tears with her. Very quickly. Just as easily as she turned her head to let out a giggle, she seemed to be crying about one thing or another. But Athena was always her shoulder to cry on, her wife was always at her side. Plush fur was a comfort to her red face, buried so deeply within her neck that she felt like she was breathing Athena in. Her scent was the only thing that she could smell, practically tasting it on her tongue. But this was something that she could never imagine coming up, nor did she know that it had been on her lover's mind as well. Babies. That was all she wanted and craved right now, to feel them within her belly moving and growing. She wanted to feel what her wife did, to go through birth. It wasn't that she wasn't as close to her boys, but she would never be the woman that gave birth to them. That special connection was between them and her, and it was something that she felt was physically missing from her. Amalia had always wanted to be a mother, to have little ones to call her own. She didn't love her boys any less because of it, there was just something missing from her life... Apparently the same thought had come to Athena, and she pulled back to study her face. Really? It wasn't just Epiphron who thought that way? She was right that it would be strange... even more of an awkward thing to bring up to her family. She could only imagine the look on Leo's face when they brought it up to him. That thought made her smile a bit, but it faded quickly. She watched with a broken expression as her ears pinned back and she looked away, bringing a whine out of Ama's mouth. After that she listened to the woman's words in silence, her head slowly lowering as she fought back even more tears. Sniffling, she nodded her head slowly. Ama could understand where she was coming from, but she didn't know. Athena didn't have a single clue, because she wasn't missing out. "But I want to be a mother too, you know..." she said in a whisper, ears pressed tightly against her skull. "I want to feel what it is like to have them grow in my belly, to go through what I watched you go through with the boys. I always felt like I have been lacking that... sense of connection because of it. You will always be the one that birthed them Athena, the one that gave them life. I feel like that is lacking in my life... a little part that I crave." The tiny woman could hardly raise her voice, a slight edge of fear in her voice. "I... I know that I sound selfish. And I understand that you don't want him in our lives again, but... you have more family don't you?" She paused again, covering her face with her front limbs. "Its noble of you to offer to do it again for us, but I can't help but feel jealous... Its not that I will say no unless I am able to birth them. I know that Leo is a good candidate... although it might be a rather interesting conversation at most. If there is no other way I will talk to him, because having babies again with you will be worth it. I can deal with this feeling, I have been able to push it down for this long." Amalia lifted her face, offering Athena a weak smile. ""

She didn't knew what kind of reaction she had had expected from Amalia at the proposition of having Leo be their surrogate father of sorts, but what Amalia told her had been so far out of what she could have thought. It had never occurred to her that Amalia would feel so strongly about actually giving birth. She had been so focused on helping Amalia avoid having to be intimate with someone else that it had never crossed her mind. She suddenly felt so guilty and selfish for unintentionally trying to keep Amalia from having that experience. While she would always believe Amalia was as much of a parent to their boys as she was, she understood what Amalia was saying about that connection. "You don't sound selfish, Amalia. If you feel that strongly about it then you absolutely deserve to have that experience. You deserve everything in the world and more, darling." She gave Amalia a small smile and nosed at her wife's cheek. Right now all she wanted was to give Amalia everything she dreamed off and cheer her up. "I do have more family, but I haven't seen any of them in so long... My only other full brother is Genesis and he's been missing since before I gave Bevroren to Roman. I have a lot of half brothers, I just don't know where they are..." She frowned thoughtfully. "When I moved down here with you and the boys I had basically cut what few ties I had left with the Armada family... I could go looking for them. I'll go ask Verux if he knows where any of them are hanging out. I just want you to keep in mind that not all of my family are the nicest wolves around... I won't let anyone I don't trust near you, but I just want you to keep that in mind and know that it makes the hunt a little harder." She sighed softly and smiled a again as she kissed Amalia's nose. "I'm going to figure this out for you, my love. If, and only if, we search every inch of Alacritis and can't find any of my family that is willing to do this for us that I trust then we'll ask Leo. Is that okay with you?" "Talk" "You" Think