ardent

You are not alone in this



Novella

Loner
Author

age
5 Years
gender
Female
gems
1796
size
Medium
build
posts
669
player
09-18-2014, 06:37 PM



After the meeting between the three Destruction alphas, Song had shared the news with Novella about poor Novel. Needless to say the girl had worried about her niece since and didn't really leave it too long before she decided to go and pay a visit to Sawtooth and see how Novel was doing now. Probably not too well given the horrible situation, and Novella doubted her presence was really going to do much at all to change things but all the same she simply had to go and visit.



And so here she was now, heading across the lands and making her way towards her niece's den. Hopefully she wouldn't simply be turned away, though she would certainly understand if Novel didn't exactly want visitors right now. Until she was told to leave her alone however, Novella wasn't going to turn around now, she certainly cared about her family and whilst Novel probably had realised that rather early on Novella wanted to make sure the fact was obvious now. The lands may have been divided, different names of different packs but she was still Novel's aunt and could still be turned to for any help or comfort. "Novel..." She would call softly as she finally came to a stop near the younger girl's den.




Ara

Somnium

age
10 Years
gender
Female
gems
0
size
Medium
build
Medium
posts
414
09-18-2014, 07:39 PM


Novel hadn't been doing great. Ara could only begin to image how painful it would be, if she were in her situation -- it broke her heart to even watch her struggle. Children were supposed to be a joyful blessing, not something forced upon anyone, and it pained her to see little to no joy in Novel's eyes on the few occasions they spoke of the children she would have. It still didn't seem real, despite her friend's rapidly growing belly, despite how quickly the weeks seemed to be dragging by.


Her dedication for Novel never wavered. Her company was treasured, even if she was mildly unpleasant at times and sad more often than not. Ara had never thought of abandoning her, and so when Novella's gentle voice echoed through Novel's den, Ara slowly roused from her sleep beside her. It felt right to stay here with her, to let her body wrap around Novel's as she tugged her close, wanting her to feel safe. On the few nights she spent away from her -- which truly were growing few and far between -- she couldn't help but worry about her, and crave her presence so deeply she thought she might lose her mind.


With a quiet squeak of a yawn, she shifted delicately away from Novel. She was a light sleeper now -- or perhaps she always had been -- and she was unwilling to disturb the white-furred girl from her nap. Silently she rose, moving to greet Novella at the den's entrance. "Novella," she greeted her warily, suddenly feeling painfully aware that she was not a Destruction; merely Novel's friend. Novel felt like family to her, and she felt strangely guilty for being the one to greet Novella, but still she dipped her head gently. "I'm sorry, but Novel is sleeping. Is everything alright?" Curious sapphire gaze fixated on her, and worry seemed to ebb from her gaze.









Novella

Loner
Author

age
5 Years
gender
Female
gems
1796
size
Medium
build
posts
669
player
09-19-2014, 08:13 AM



Whilst the scents strongly suggested that Novel hadn't simply been left alone during her struggle, Novella would still be rather surprised to see Ara appear from within Novel's den. Rather than realising how close the two girls had become, she instead recalled that Ara was a healer and would come to the conclusion that perhaps she was simply there to help Novel keep healthy. She could only imagine the mental problems that were likely making poor Novel feel worse on top of the usual pregnancy symptoms.



Her niece was asleep though and it seemed that if she wanted to check in now she'd have to speak to Ara for a while. She certainly had no problems with that, though she didn't know her too well she had no problems at all with the girl, she seemed rather friendly and caring, not to mention she had kept her mother and siblings safe during the birth of the children. Ara was more than ok in her books.



"I heard what happened." She would begin quietly, the sympathy evident within her voice whether Ara needed to hear it or not. "How is she doing?"




Ara

Somnium

age
10 Years
gender
Female
gems
0
size
Medium
build
Medium
posts
414
09-19-2014, 02:59 PM


Since the incident, every time that someone came to her to talk she couldn't help but feel a pang of anxiety. Ara was painfully aware of how old her parents were getting, and though they were not exactly unhealthy, they certainly didn't have much longer left. What if one of them needed her, and couldn't call to her in time? What if something happened to her siblings, particularly her newest baby brother? There was no panic evident in Novella's gaze, only the worry that any loving family member might portray, and she felt the tension slowly ease from her mind as she nodded slowly in greeting to Novella.


Warily she offered a smile, though it was half-hearted at best. 'I heard what happened,' she explained carefully, and she found herself nodding again, her gaze drifting to Novel's sleeping form in the shade of her den. "She is... okay," she admitted with a soft sigh. There was no using lying to Novel's family and pretending she was doing well, but she knew things could be worse. Some days were certainly worse than others. The impending birth of her children was coming quickly too, causing a great amount of stress on her. "Doing better, I guess. She is having a hard time, Novella." And it seemed no herbs could soothe the pain -- only time would lessen it. It was a hard fact to come to terms with, that she could not ease all of Novel's suffering, but slowly she was getting used to the fact that sometimes all she could do was be there for her and nothing more.













Novella

Loner
Author

age
5 Years
gender
Female
gems
1796
size
Medium
build
posts
669
player
09-19-2014, 04:19 PM



With such a large family there was no surprise really that at one point or another everyone would suffer with their own dramas, enough to keep the family always worrying about something. Some were perhaps a little more simple her own certainly included in that especially on comparison to Novel's far more serious problems. Just once though Novella wished that things wold be ok for all of the Destruction family, that they could enjoy a long period of nothing but pleasure and peace.



Ara would begin to explain attempting to lighten the far darker sympathetic thoughts within Novella's mind whilst still not masking the truth of it all. Her expression certainly conveyed her emotions well in that moment, still so pained by the news that anyone could bring such suffering upon her sweet, little niece. Novel was far from the tiny pup she had met upon her arrival here but there was no denying the lovely, innocent nature that had stuck with her.



There wasn't much that she could really respond with, Novella hadn't come here expecting to hear any wonderful news but rather something along the lines of what Ara had said. She would exhale slowly, mind wracking her brain for something to say but such discussions were not easy and to be honest she wasn't sure if speaking to Novel herself would really help her form any reply regardless. "I doubt there's anything I can do, but I'm there for her if she needs me at all, everyone in Threar is." Maybe it was simply best for her to just go, Novel was asleep and she definitely didn't want to disturb her and now was still really struggling for anything else to say.




Ara

Somnium

age
10 Years
gender
Female
gems
0
size
Medium
build
Medium
posts
414
09-20-2014, 08:18 PM


It was often difficult to know what exactly Novel needed from her. Somehow, her companionship didn't feel like it would be enough for her, despite the fact that she knew it was treasured and wanted. Ara was happy at Novella's presence though, knowing comfort from family and friends alike was well appreciated, even if Novel might not show it. Her blue eyes would mirror the worry that Novella's own orbs held as she watched her.


"Perhaps I can wake her up soon," she suggested quickly. Almost immediately she realized her choice of words was a poor one. Spending so much time with Novel had made her feel very much like family, in a way, but she was not -- and certainly Novella could chose if she wanted to wake up Novel or not. She felt heat rush to her face and shifted slightly, leaning her weight from one paw to the next. "I'm sure she would love to see you." There was a slight tension to her voice. Ara had spent so much time with nobody except Novel and her only family lately that interacting with someone else felt strange. And the strange, aching guilt at spending so much time with Novel was coming back now.


Either way, it seemed fair to let Novella talk to her, even if it meant waking her up. But maybe not quite yet. She hadn't been asleep for long, and waking her up so quickly seemed unfair. "I think they will be born soon," she told her, her voice lower now. It was a strange thought, and she wasn't entirely sure how comfortable Novel was with the reality of it all. It would be difficult for her to raise them alone, but she'd already told Novel she would be willing to help if necessary. "She is probably going to need a lot of help. She's afraid that he'll come back for them."











Novella

Loner
Author

age
5 Years
gender
Female
gems
1796
size
Medium
build
posts
669
player
09-25-2014, 04:29 AM (This post was last modified: 09-25-2014, 04:29 AM by Novella.)



Before she suggested leaving, Ara would offer to wake Novel soon. Whilst it would be nice to see her niece and of course she was glad to oblige if it really would brighten her up at all Novella still wasn't sure it was the greatest idea. The poor girl needed her rest after all and she certainly didn't want to be the one to disturb that. She would shake her head gently, politely declining the offer. "It's alright, I'll come and see her another time. I'm guessing she needs her rest." There had been times when she had felt drained enough and there had been far less stress upon her shoulders than Novel was likely now carrying.



They would be born soon? Perhaps there was where the reality kicked in a little more for Novella. Her first, great nieces and nephews, Song's first grandchildren, her parents first great grandchildren and they would soon be running around the place. Still she couldn't be sure whether to smile or not. They would be wonderful no doubt but the way in which they had been created was hardly a thing to celebrate at all. Children weren't meant to be born into the world this way, especially not for poor Novel.



And then came a fear that Novella hadn't yet considered but would be quick to banish. Though she had disapproved of Virgil's decision to keep Anthem's children away from him and the Destruction family, she would make a similar one now. To be fair they had never wished to pull them from Olympus either, Novella had simply have the opportunity to watch them grow to officially be able to meet them and say "Hey, I'm your aunt."



"He dares to try come anywhere near Novel and her pups and there will be at least two packs ready to stop him." She assumed Abaven would offer their strength and support as well, though as she had already pointed out, Threar would be there to help. They may have technically been two packs now though that didn't mean they couldn't unite over any issues still.




Ara

Somnium

age
10 Years
gender
Female
gems
0
size
Medium
build
Medium
posts
414
09-28-2014, 04:21 PM


Time was a very strange thing. It seemed as though it had been just yesterday that Elohim had found her, panicked and afraid, and had led her to Novel. She had been so hurt and alone, but with time she had grown at least okay with her situation, if not fully herself yet. The pain was still there, but it was subdued and bearable now, though the impending birth seemed to place a huge strain on her shoulders again.


She didn't know whether she had made the right decision in offering to wake up Novel in a bit, but Novella said she would come another time. Slowly she nodded, somewhat grateful at the woman's decision.


Ara felt the mood shift slightly as they spoke of the possibility of the man named Lel coming back for her children. But Novel's promise that Threar would be there to protect Novel and her children if needed -- though she had never doubted for one moment that their sister pack would do anything differently -- made a small smile tug at the corners of her lips. She was grateful that Novel had a family so large and protective, and just as thankful that she was allowed to share in their good will. "I already told her I would help care for them." she offered with a fair bit of hesitance. Though most of Sawtooth would help if needed, she felt like a more permanent arrangement might be helpful for Novel. But the full extent of her involvement was something that only Novel could decide. "Novella," she'd start after a moment of thoughtful silence. "I guess there's something I'd like to tell you. Or get your opinion on, rather." Ara was not quick to open up to anyone, especially wolves that she didn't know well; her voice quivered slightly as she spoke, wondering how she might phrase her worries.









Novella

Loner
Author

age
5 Years
gender
Female
gems
1796
size
Medium
build
posts
669
player
09-28-2014, 07:19 PM



As much as a part of Novella had wanted to say yes to the offer, rush in and wake up her niece she knew deep down it was for the best that she didn't. Even as she answered however and Ara gratefully accepted accepted the choice there was a part of the girl that was still tempted to change her mind and see how Novel was doing for herself. To return and see Novel again another day, whilst perhaps not the nicest excuse, was still a very valid one for returning to Sawtooth again soon, not that Novella ever wished for a day where she would need a good excuse to stop by and see her family here.



The care of the children, it was a somewhat strange offer to make in some ways, though in others certainly understandable. Clearly the two had become good friends and she suspected the offer was much like the way her family had always in to help care for children every time they arrived. They were hard enough work with two parents, Novel would surely need some help. "I'm sure the help will be greatly appreciated." She would respond smiling softly.



There would be a silence before Ara would speak again, firstly simply Novella's name before pausing once more. She had the older woman's attention however and mismatched eyes would watch now as the healer began to speak once more. Ara had never been a particularly bold or loud individual in Novella's opinion, though the nervous tone to the girl's voice certainly seemed out of place now as she spoke. Novella would frown softly and encourage her to share whatever was on her mind. Was there more fears about the horrid male, was there possibly something else wrong with Novel or even Ara herself? "What's the matter?"




Ara

Somnium

age
10 Years
gender
Female
gems
0
size
Medium
build
Medium
posts
414
09-28-2014, 09:33 PM (This post was last modified: 09-28-2014, 09:35 PM by Ara.)



Although Ara knew she had a lot on her plate, she didn't mind contributing even more. She felt she ought to do more for the pack in general, perhaps offer healing lessons for the younger ones in the pack, if there was any interest or need for her skills. Besides this, she knew there very well might be a time when she would have to care for Steel, as well as continuing to care for her parents and soon, for Novel's children. It was something she would gladly do; her circle of friends was quite small and she rarely left home these days, except to collect herbs from neighboring lands. It wouldn't be a burden, but rather something she looked forward to, so long as Novel accepted her help.


Instantly she wondered if she ought to have said nothing at all. Her feelings for Novel were strong, almost overwhelming, and she didn't know who else she could talk to. There was no need to burden her parents with her confused thoughts. "Nothing's wrong," she told her quickly, shaking her head as her muzzle fell to the earth. "It's about Novel though." How might she phrase this? For a moment she would shuffle her paws, overcome with worry at how she might sound, still questioning if she should even admit this to anyone at all. "I think..." another pause would follow, her breath catching in her throat. Why was something that felt so right, so difficult to admit? These feelings were foreign to her and she couldn't help but wonder if she was simply overreacting. "I think I'm in love with Novel." Though she wasn't afraid of the feelings not being reciprocated -- she hadn't even thought about telling her yet, in the midst of all that her friend had been going through -- she really worried that her confession might ruin what they did share, and that was terrifying. "I'm not sure what to do, if anything. I just thought telling someone might help it make sense." The girl felt her heart hammering in her chest, instantly feeling regret sink in; it felt strange to admit something so raw and personal to Novella, and she was afraid of what she might say in return.









Novella

Loner
Author

age
5 Years
gender
Female
gems
1796
size
Medium
build
posts
669
player
09-29-2014, 06:23 AM



Novella's initial thoughts had of course been upon Novel and her unborn children, was there possibly something else that could be wrong with them? Ara would swiftly banish away those worries though the fact that the topic was still concerning Novel would leave the Author rather confused, was there something else that had happened that she ought to know about? She was certainly curious, already wondering now if perhaps this matter had been discussed with Song or at least whether it needed to be. She wouldn't prompt the girl to hurry however, patiently waiting despite her own mind now craving answers.



Of all the possibilities that swarmed her thoughts, this was rather unexpected. A soft 'oh', barely audible would part from Novella's lips as she stood rather shocked now assessing the situation she had been rather unprepared for as Ara continued to speak, clearly so confused about the entire situation. Her own days of similar confusion hadn't been all that long ago and likewise she'd needed a gentle bit of guidance to point her in the right direction. Alright, so it had actually been an almighty shove from Satu though Novella had been entirely clueless of her own emotions, so unaware that she had been falling for Frith.



"Well I do believe it's probably better for you to speak with Novel about that." She responded. "And be very thankful it wasn't Satu you went to for help." As much as she loved her cousin the playful teasing probably wasn't for everyone and on this very delicate matter of the heart, Novella suspected a more gentle approach was needed for Ara.



"Do you, think she feels the same way?" She would question softly, tone a little more serious now than the small jest at her cousin. This was of course one big thing to consider, it'd likely be a very awkward matter if Novel didn't, of course however there was the strong possibility that Ara wouldn't be able to tell. In her own experience Novella had blindly leapt into the topic, barely in control of her own emotions let alone having any idea what Frith may have felt. Somehow everything had fallen into place, she couldn't guarantee it would for Ara but she would try her best to offer some advice to the girl now.




Ara

Somnium

age
10 Years
gender
Female
gems
0
size
Medium
build
Medium
posts
414
09-29-2014, 05:07 PM


Novella's reaction hadn't been what she had anticipated. She was speak quietly, nothing more than a soft 'oh,' and Ara felt her ears flatten against her skull. She had expected the worse -- perhaps Novella might have told her that she couldn't possibly deserve to be with her cousin, let alone to tell her how she felt for her -- but there wasn't a lot of excitement, either. Instead, she seemed level and reserved, though vaguely interested in Ara's confession.


"Satu?" she'd inquire softly. The name was familiar, but she couldn't quite place it. Even still, she didn't know who else she might possibly go to about this besides her own family. Even telling Novella had been a bit spontaneous of her, but it felt as though a weight had been lifted from her shoulders already.


"I don't want to burden her," the woman would admit sheepishly. Dealing with feelings had never been easy for. In the times in her life when she'd been troubled -- namely, when her father had been held as a prisoner of war -- she'd delved into her studies fully. But this time, she could not wander away and distract herself, and she found herself confused as how to deal with things. "She's been through too much. The last thing I want to do is make her feel uncomfortable." Ara was one of the few that Novel seemed to trust fully after the incident, and she couldn't imagining ruining the bond that they shared.


Did she feel the same way? Was there some way to tell? Slowly she could shake her head, tail twitching slightly behind her. "Is there some way to tell?" she would inquire timidly, wondering if it was a stupid question. Ara recognized the distinct look in her parents' eyes when they saw one another -- and yet she still didn't know if it compared at all to how Novel might feel about it. "I guess it's possible," she admitted after a moment, though she found herself shrugging. "But I can't help but wonder what might happen if she tells me she doesn't."









Novella

Loner
Author

age
5 Years
gender
Female
gems
1796
size
Medium
build
posts
669
player
09-29-2014, 05:49 PM



Satu perhaps wasn't one of the most well known members of the family. Not Destruction by blood but by bond to her cousins though she wasn't exactly the most responsible. Novella would never fault her at all, the girl was still the favourite of the few cousins she actually knew about though certainly not many others it seemed knew about her. "My cousin, her advice although it worked could have been delivered a little better." Novella responded, explaining her little comment further for the confused girl.



Ara's reluctance certainly made sense. Such realisations could cause a mountain of thoughts and feelings to arise and she was sure the effect was the same regardless of whether feelings were shared or not. It would certainly be a wonderful distraction for a moment from the pregnancy and the entire ordeal of all that though ultimately could either be a wonderful joy for the girl or a whole other stream of difficulties and awkwardness depending upon Novel's feelings. It perhaps was too big a risk to take with the weight of the world already upon the poor girl's shoulders.



Was there a way to tell. Honestly Novella wasn't entirely certain. The blur of an evening where all had fell into place for her was a lucky miracle she still supposed. She hadn't intended upon sharing her feelings, hadn't even imagined that Frith would feel the same and therefore no clue how he would react. Now their feelings were certainly clear though before from the reactions of her parents, her sister and her cousin perhaps it had been clearer to others than it had herself and Frith. Was it the same for Ara and Novel she wondered?



"Honestly Ara, I don't know." She would respond hoping the news wouldn't disappoint her too much. "I didn't even realise how I felt let alone how Frith felt. I'm really not the best to ask for help on the matter." She would explain. It was a complete mystery how she had ended up so fortunate in her own relationship, her knowledge on the matter of the heart was clearly lacking.



Ara would hazard a guess at it not being an impossibility but still there was of course that chance that perhaps the feelings wouldn't be shared. She wouldn't feel glad at all should that be the case, it'd be awkward for the pair and poor Ara would likely feel rather awful. Ara had nothing to fear about this whole not being good enough idea she'd gotten into her head, there wasn't anything Novella could fault her on at all.



She would sigh softly at the girl's comment, not knowing how to respond to it and certainly already sympathising in the event that this was the case. "I imagine it'll hurt and things will be hard." She would respond bluntly. "If she does feel the same way though, words can't explain how wonderful it is." She didn't want to get her hopes up of course, but equally she didn't want to discourage her too much from perhaps sharing her feelings.



"I'm sorry I can't help you any more than that." Novella would comment. She had probably been useless really for this conversation. "If there is such a thing as a right moment I think you'll have to decide for yourself and just take it, especially if there is even a small chance she feels the same."




Ara

Somnium

age
10 Years
gender
Female
gems
0
size
Medium
build
Medium
posts
414
09-30-2014, 07:06 AM


Though it felt like a great weight had been lifted from her shoulders, the burden of having to carry this secret with her no longer quite as heavy, she now had new worries. She'd never really heard of love happening between two women, but she'd also never heard anything saying it wasn't a thing that could happen. Though Novel had been surprised, it'd be a subdued sort of thing, nothing that made Ara feel as though what she admitted was wrong or somehow invalid. Although she knew nature's course was to bring men and women together, to allow for reproduction and continued bloodlines, she'd never had much interest in men, even though she'd had her first heat already -- in fact, she'd never been interested in anyone but Novel, and it had taken her awhile to realize it. It seemed impossible that loving Novel could to wrong, for it felt so right, but it didn't stop her from worrying about what others might think or say.


She would watch with careful interest as Novel processed her questions. Ara knew she, too, had only recently proclaimed her love for another, though they had been together long enough now to give birth to a litter of children as well as start a pack of their own. Perhaps she had been through something similar? Her sapphire gaze was hopefully as she stared, unblinkingly waiting for her answer. 'Honestly Ara, I don't know,' she would reply, and she felt her heart sink slightly in her chest. Why were affairs of the heart so complicated? She knew that love was not an easy thing. Even her parents' relationship had not been flawless. They'd told her that even they had been separated numerous times, and she knew that her mother had even had children with other men. And yet their love was undeniable, and strong enough to move mountains, despite everything they had been through.


A gentle sigh would leave her lips as she would shift her paws, wondering if they ought to move further away from Novel. Still she slept soundly nearby, peaceful and content for the moment. "Honestly, just telling someone helps," she admitted. Perhaps not as much as she would've hoped, but it was better than nothing. Feelings were difficult to deal with for her, and to even verbalize them made them feel infinitely more real -- as though just by telling someone she thought she might be in love with Novel, suddenly it felt even more tangible to her.


'I imagine it'll hurt and things will be hard. If she does feel the same way though, words can't explain how wonderful it is.' Though she knew some would be worried about if the feelings were reciprocated in the same way or not, her real worries were over how Novel might react, about ruining what they shared and no longer being a caretaker for her future children and for Novel herself. Her ears flattened briefly on her skull before she relaxed. "I think I will tell her eventually," she would inform Novella warily. "I'm still scared though." And why wouldn't she be? She felt vulnerable and exposed, even telling this to Novella. She was a wolf unused to showing weakness to others and admitting she was afraid and insecure was something new for her. The feelings weren't, but sharing them with others certainly was new. "But thank you for listening. I appreciate it."












Novella

Loner
Author

age
5 Years
gender
Female
gems
1796
size
Medium
build
posts
669
player
09-30-2014, 07:41 AM



Two women was a new thing too for Novella. Perhaps it was a little strange though clearly you couldn't help who you fell in love with. She had never gone running off to the Albastine Shrine anticipating to fall in love with the stranger she met there, it had just happened. She realised now almost instantaneously that connection had been made between their hearts, she had trusted him probably far more than she should have done then could understand why her parents had worried and yet still she wouldn't have changed a thing, all had fortunately worked out perfectly.



She hadn't actually really gotten the chance to speak about her own emotions to anyone other than Frith by the time she realised them. Satu had certainly helped her to become aware though perhaps she would have felt far more relaxed going to Frith with all had she actually sat down and spoke with, maybe not her parents but Symphony had certainly seemed rather supportive.



Quietly she would sit as Ara continued to processed her words now, plan what she might possibly do. She would tell Novel at some point it seemed despite the fears. "I'm not sure life ever stops being scary." She would respond softly, an attempt to ease her worries some what, the fear was rather normal it seemed. As for the listening; "Any time Ara." Destruction or not, she was part of Sawtooth and therefore linked to Threar and more importantly though she didn't know the girl too well really, from the occasions she had spoken to her and the things she had done for the pack, Novella could certainly see her as a friend or at least a potential one.