She would leave her home, crossing the borders without looking back. She wanted to get away, to remember what it was like to be free, to not have any obligations. Her memories would drift, thinking back to the beginning, when she first arrived her. Spats with her brother, only to made up by mind blowing sex. Meeting Taurig and carrying his spawn. Finding recruits to build up her army. Meeting Kylar. She would smirk. The disdain he had held for her that day. The day they had admitted their true feelings for each other. Giving birth to Basanti. Reclaiming her throne. Everything it all flooded her mind. And nearly very step of the way, Kylar had been beside her, supporting her. But now, now it seemed she had lost him forever. He had been silent for months, rarely showing his face, or even leaving the den for that matter. On the days he did leave, he did nothing but pace around the borders, wearing the earth away beneath his paws. A sad sigh would slip from inky lips, her gaze downcast as she navigate the ravine. Moonlight would peek through the trees, teasing her already silver pelt. A light breeze would ruffle her coat, tangling the thick hairs. Her trial hung casually above her hocks, head crown level with her shoulders. Muscles would cease movement when toes gripped the edge of the ravine. Her gaze would land on the seemingly bottomless pit. She stood absolutely still, unmoving. Silence would fall around her, relaxation slipping into her bones. She longed for the good ol days. When her Kylar ran the pack together, found more trouble than anything else, fought endlessly, but still made up. In her mind, it all hung in the balance of not knowing what would happen next. "Speech"

Still riding on the high of his recent victory over the newest addition his mind felt oddly clear, light and… well… clear. He had to find Cat. In his time of sanity it was all he could think to do, he needed to see his wife. He had searched the pack lands first, hit up all her regular haunts but nothing. It wasn't until he took time to patrol that he would catch her scent as it left the pack territory. For a moment he would stand staring out after her before setting off after her without another thought. Who knew how long he would keep a handle on his own mind, might as well get it all out in the open right off the bat. It wasn't overly hard to find her, she wasn't trying to be sneaky or discrete about her pace but instead just out for a walk. He would catch up with no effort, longer legs closing the distance between them in a few strides before he would slow slightly and fall into stride behind her. Head would drop lazily, attempting to land so his head was draped over her spine. "I wanted to keep them close you know…" He would mutter, would she know to whom he was referring?

The sound of his familiar steps would reach her ears, though she didn't acknowledge him until he touched her. His touch would burn like fire, scalding her flesh as soon as he made contact. But she wouldn't flinch. Gravelly tones would invade her ears, immediately registering just who he was talking about. There was only one wolf of importance to him that she had expelled from the pack. Colten. He wanted his grandson close, but for what. "Well isn't that a shock." Toxic words dripped from her lips, falling like stones. She would not turn to look at him. He had refused to have anything to do with her over the past few months, neglected his duties as alpha, husband and father. But he wanted to keep his grandson close? Hackles bristled as she felt anger began to brew deep in her belly. Perhaps she could just push him over the edge and into the ravine so that she could be done with him. Eyes burned with unspoken emotion, though she continued to keep her gaze averted. Ears pulled back against her skull. "Perhaps you should join him then." Words left her lips in a hiss. Lips twitched, threatening to curl into a snarl. "Speech"

She would not say anything for a long time as he came to stand with her, head dropping on her spine as he stared out at the ravine with her in silence for a time. But then she would speak and immediately his eyes would narrow and his head would lift, breaking the contact between them and narrowing his eyes dangerously. "Are you saying you wouldn't feel the same if I had done that to your grandchildren?" He would say easily, tone dangerous as he took another step back and looked around for a minute. He knew he deserved her hatred but she had been hard on his grandkids ever since he had come home with them and now they were gone. Yes they were safe but they were gone from his immediate vicinity. She would speak again and Kylar's lips would curl back, hackles raising as he allowed a growl to rumble up his chest. "Them. Both of them are gone and I don't even know why. What the hell did they do to you? Are you just mad at me and are taking out on them or is it something else?" No emotion filled his voice, just a hardness as he studied her from the distance he had placed himself out.

He would break contact with her, words leaving his lips, his tone equally dangerous. It only worked to fuel her anger. He dared to bring up her own grandchildren. But thats where he was wrong. "My grandchildren have a home and parents." She would finally turn to look at him as he took a step back. His dark lips curled back as his hackles lifted. Them? Amarant had left too. Not that is really bothered her if he stayed or left, she had only housed them because Kylar had dragged them home. A home where they did not belong, where they didn't fit in. His voice was wiped clean of emotion, though his words were hard. "Amarant must have left on his own terms." She would state, a single shoulder lifting in a shrug. "Colten not only sired a bastard, but attacked me." Lips curled back to expose fangs, words coming out in a hiss. "Perhaps if you pulled your head out of your ass, you would know that." She flung toxic words at him, eyes narrowing to slits, raging oozing from her every pour. "Speech"

His lips would curl as she flung words at him and immediately he would retaliate, his words flying from his tongue with very little thought given to them. "My daughter is dead Cat. Fucking. Dead. I thought you of all people would understand this! I'm not even sure if I'm sorry for it or god damn elated because apparently my whole bloodline with that woman is cursed. But thats besides the point because either way, they had a family and a home but then that was done. Gone. If your grandkids ended up in the same situation and you brought them home I would do everything I could to make them feel welcome and like they were at home whether the fit in or not. i expected the same fucking thing from you!" His voice would stay the same volume throughout it all, tempo the same but still his body burned with rage as it all came pouring out. But still somehow he managed to cover his teeth and lower his hackles, head lifting and tail arching rather then a show of rage. He wanted to rip into her so badly and yet he refrained. He had never attacked her. Not once. He had fought her but never started a physical confrontation and he had no intention of changing that.

Cat would attempt to explain it all but again the words would come up, spewing out like vomit without much thought to it all. "Amarant left because family is everything. He wanted to be with his brother. A bastard? Tell me. How is his child anymore of a bastard then Senka, Valentine or Basanti. All of them were born in a heat of the moment decision. At least he has the good graces to fucking stand by the mother of his child! I'm god damn proud of him for that! Perhaps if you pulled your head out of your ass you would see the world for what it was rather then continuing to believe it revolves completely around you!" He would say, words dangerously smooth, hissing out the ends of a few sentences as his lip twitched into the beginnings of a snarl. "They are my family and you treat them like shit. I need them here. They could be the different between sickness and health or life and death for our children. Why can't you just accept this!" He would finally snap, letting out an exasperated sigh and rolling his eyes back in his head as if it was such a simple thing that she should just understand.

He spoke of her daughter. Immediately the world around her would still. Everything slipped away and all there was was him. Anger slipped away from her features, her face becoming eerily void of any emotion. She only heard half of what he had said. Cursed bloodline. Her grandkids would be made welcome. Something about what he expected from her. His defenses slide away, his crown lifting and tail curling high instead. But she stilled remained silent, her gaze fixed unseeingly on his face. Amarant. Family. Bastards. Basanti. The world doesn't revolve around her. Life or death. Children. His words would finally show some emotion, but it fell on deaf ears. She would meet his gaze evenly, cooly. Something had snapped, fractured within her psyche. She found walls beginning to build steadily around her, going higher and higher until they were impenetrable. Steady breaths would fill her lungs, her sides rising and falling evenly. Ice spread through her veins, consuming her. Suddenly she was aware of how her brother felt when his little puppet had betrayed him. So angry he was numb. Silence surrounded her, a whole new level of cold blackening her heart. She found herself with the sudden inability to care. Taking a deep breath, she would speak. "Then by all means, bring them home." She would coo softly, words sickly sweet. Silver legs would begin to move, seeking to move her past him and away from him, her ultimate goal to leave him standing at the edge of the ravine alone. "Speech"

She would become oddly still, oddly distant even as he ranted and raved about everything and anything. He didn't care though, didn't stop or slow in his madness fuelled mind. He had lost two kids now, she was only on her first. She didn't know fucking pain! As he ceased she would draw in a deep breath and then speak plainly, telling him to bring them home before trying to push past him. His lip would curl, immediately moving to block her path, attempting to shove his chest at her before taking a few steps forwards to invade her personal space. He was not done with her, not by a long shot. "I would die for my family, I would kill for my family. Fuck I have killed for my family. My family extends beyond blood, i would call a fucking tree family if you decided you wanted me to. Why the hell don't you feel the same way?!" He would ask, no demand. Continuing to push himself in her face. No she wouldn't be leaving anytime soon...

His anger would flare once more. His moved into her path, blocking her escape. Her cool gaze would tip up towards him as he shoved his chest against her own. She would stumble, unprepared for his sudden assault. He would press onward, forcing her back. Claws scrapped against the ground until there was nothing beneath her. First her hind end would give away beneath her, causing eyes to widen as she began to tumble. A startled cry would leave her lips. Refusing to go down alone, jaws shot forward, grabbing a hold of the front/side portion of Kylars neck. Fangs sunk into fat flesh just as she slipped over the edge. Together they would tumble down the ravine. She would bounce off trees and rocks, bones fracturing, flesh opening. She would hit the bottom of the ravine with a thud, her entire body throbbing. A low whine would leave her larynx. She didn't move, eyes closed, only her sides rose and fell. Even breathing hurt. Blood matted her chest, a large gash stretching from shoulder to shoulder. Everything hurt. Fractured ribs. A gushing chest wound. She didn't even try to move. By the time her eyes slide open, she was so disoriented she had not idea where she was. Without moving, she would look around, trying to remember where she was and how she got there. Limbs would pull beneath her in an attempt to sit up, but as soon as she moved, pain shot up her left foreleg and across her ribs. Sinking back down, she would flex her remaining limbs, finding them all working. Vision blurred, her mind swirled as she desperately tried to put the pieces together. "Speech"

 

Had they really been that close to the edge? Had he really just pushed his wife off a cliff? It all seemed to happen so slowly, his world seemed to shatter into a million pieces as he pushed just a little to far, just a little to hard and she tottered over the edge for a moment. Her eyes would snap wide, shock and surprise fluttering across her saucer sized orbs as a sound passed her lips before they would reach out. Immediately her jaws would sink into his neck, sinking deeply past flesh and fat into thick muscle but he barely felt it, acting completely on instinct he would reach forward, jaws flying wide in an attempt to grab her as well but he did more damage then good. Had he simply leaned back and allowed her to grab him and use her bite to stabilize herself they probably would have been fine but instead he rocked his weight forward to try and grab her and that was probably what sent him flying over the edge with her. They were free falling for what felt like forever and for maybe the first time in his life sheer terror arched through his whole body. Not for himself but for her, for his wife. Despite everything he loved her, that had never been the question, despite their arguments and fights he had never wanted this. But there was nothing he could do. Not for her. Not for himself. Instincts kicked in, training forcing his body limp even as a tear slipped from his eye, would this be the last breath they shared together? But despite the fact that they seemed to hang in mid air for an eternity it was no time at all, there was only seconds before they came crashing back to earth, not even time for an apology. His body hit with a sickening crack, his head snapping back as his chest connected first with the ground and he was sent into a summersault, gravity a cruel heartless bitch as she flung his limp form meters away from his wife. He couldn't feel anything when he finally came to rest and all he could smell was blood. So much blood. He felt nothing... Was he dead? For a moment his vision swam and then disappeared and he drifted out of consciousness. Eyes would snap wide a moment later, panic flooding through him. Upon his chest a gash had opened from the front of his right shoulder to the middle of his chest on the lower left side. Left shoulder had dislocated from it's socket and gash had opened over his right eye. He couldn't open it, when he did all there was was black. Was he blind? Did he care? No...  "Cat..." His voice was a horse croak as he tried to move, tried to move anything but there was nothing for a time. Again he would try and this time he felt his paws move and twitch. It felt like forever but he would roll himself to his belly. Fuck. Felt like cracked ribs too. Left leg was useless but somehow he managed to right himself, standing and hobbling despite the pain that arched through him. He needed to see her... Needed to make sure she was alive... WORDS HERE

 

Pain unlike anything she had felt spread through her veins and kept her from moving. Each breath was like inhaling fire. She wheezed, desperate for air, to take a breath that didn't hurt. Blood spilled freely from her chest, the gash deep enough to cut through muscle. Her vision blurred, fading in and out of focus, before darkness would consume her. It was like she was drowning, struggling to keep her head above the darkness. Seconds would pass before eyes fluttered open once more. It was in vain that she would try to move, to ensure that her body was still working like it should. Kylar. What had just happened would finally become clear. He had pushed her off the edge, sent her tumbling to what should have been her ear. She would whine. He had just tried to kill her. Legs would flail, desperate to find purchase to bring her to her feet. Sure things had been bad, but bad enough that he had shoved her over a cliff? Pain exploded, her movements sloppy and uncoordinated. Blood loss made the world spin, eyes unable to focus on anything. She felt like she was going to be sick. Her body would go rigid with pain her left foreleg held any of her weight. Her bodice would tremble and sway before collapsing once more. Frustration began to build. Damn him. Looking around wildly, disoriented gaze would find him moving towards her. Lips peeled back, warning him off as she scrambled to move away from him. He had shoved her off a cliff, moving forward even as she reached out for him. But she would not die that easily. A secondary pain would tug at her, demanding her attention, even if she was reluctant to do so. They had their ups and downs, their fights, their good days, and everything in between. But never had she imagined killing him, seriously killing him. Yet just moments ago, he had tried to end it all. Her vision would blur with unshed tears, still unable to clearly focus on him. Her only goal was to get away from him, to prevent from finishing what he had started. Blood coated her forelegs when she was finally wobbling around one three legs, head tucked low in a defensive manner. She moved like a caged animal, her only goal was to survive. "Speech"

Pain. It was beginning to hit him now. Everything hurt from breathing to moving to simply fucking existing in this wretched cold world. Cataleya had been and still was his everything, she was the only thing that kept him from drowning in his own mind and misery. Despite everything, despite all the shit he put her through, despite their ups and downs they had made it through and now he had pushed her off a fucking cliff. He had pushed her. Even if it had been unintentional, even if he had tried to reverse it there was no denying the fact that this was all his fault. There was a mixture of emotions that hit him as hard as a freight train when he heard her wheezing breath, when he saw her move. Relief was the first. she was alive. But then she was up, teetering on three legs as well, holding a paw close even as blood seeped from her chest. "Cat... I..." His words were a soft croak, blood dribbling from his lips. Had he bitten his tongue too? It hurt him more then he would even say to see the absolute fear in her eyes as she gaze at him and back peddled away from him. His shoulders would slacken as his mind reeled with all this information. Part of him wanted to give her her space, to allow her the distance between them that she so desired but at the same time... Part of him told him, not shrieked at him that he would never see her again if he let her go. But what could he say? There was nothing he could say that would ever make this better and he knew that. He didn't blame her for her hatred, for her fear. He felt weak, useless. He wanted nothing more then to break down and cry, to beg and plead for her to stay but all he could do was stand there, staring at her, gaze pleading as he began to tremble. Left paw dragged uselessly along the ground as he attempted to hop a few steps closer. He wanted to help her, wanted to take all her pain away. If he could redo everything, anything to make this better he would. But... What could he do...? WORDS HERE

 

His words invaded her ears, pleading softly. It registered only briefly. He would never hurt her. He couldn't. He loved her. She kept him from completely shattering under the weight of the world. He supported her in everything, stood beside her as her silent knight. And now it was shattered into a million little pieces. He had kept her heart beating, had provided her with the unexplainable feeling that was love. Together they had created children. They had made it through everything. Illness. Death. Fights. Falling empires. Elimination of enemies. But he had pushed her. He tried to take the vey breath from her lungs. He had tried to take it all away. For the first time in her life, she was completely lost. She didn't know which way was up anymore. Drawing in a shaky breathe, she desperately tried to regain control, to force aside what had just happened and brush it off like any other fight, but she couldn't. He had betrayed her. He would shuffle towards her, causing her to flinch. A low growl leaving her lips. Her battered form would shake uncontrollably, her upright position swaying to the point of collapse. The fear that she felt was suffocating, threatening to end her life right then and there. She had never been afraid. Not since the day her parents had abandoned her. She had looked death in the face, she had taken down enemies without second thoughts, she had spilled blood with no remorse. She wasnt suppose to be afraid. A sob would wrack her frame, tears finally spilling and wetting her cheeks. Legs would give out beneath her weight, sending her down into a bloodied heap. "You - You pushed me!" She would accuse him, words high pitched with pain she couldn't even begin to describe. After everything, he had pushed her. Such a simple act, that had caused so much damaged. Darkness would cloud the edges of her vision, as she huddled on the ground, defensive even in her pitiful state. She would be damned if she died like this. "Speech"

He wanted to crumple and fall to her paws as he had at Secrets but she would not accept that, he knew that. But really… What could he do? There was nothing, this was his entire fault. She would snarl, growling and shaking as she craned her body away from him as he attempted to close the distance between them. She was shaking and then… A sound foreign to him gasped through her chest,  a sob wracking her form as tears began to pour down her cheeks. It hurt him more then any of his wounds to know that he was the reason she was crying, that he was the reason for all of her pain both mental and physical. She would collapse after a moment but he would not go to her as much as he wanted to, as much as every fiber of his being screamed at him to go to her. For a moment he would stand, trembling as he hung his head. Words hit him harder then any physical blow and it dropped him onto his haunches, reclining into a seated position as his whole form began to tremble uncontrollably. ”I know…” His words were choked, drenched in pain and sorrow as his head drooped under it’s own weight before he would finally crumple in a useless heap. There were still a few feet apart but it felt like a thousand. They couldn’t touch but as blood seeped from their bodies it would move downhill and slowly mingle together in a pool between them. ”I… I can’t even say I’m sorry. It would never been enough. I would never pompously hurt you Cat…” His words were harsh and pained, croaked out even as blood continued to seemingly pour from his body. He was feeling light headed, the blood loss getting to him but he couldn’t let go now, he couldn’t let her leave even if they had to lay in this crumpled heap and talk it out. ”Please… Let me help you..” He would plead. He didn’t care about himself but he needed to take her pain away. WORDS HERE

 

He didn't move towards her, which was sadly a relief. His only movement was rocking back onto his haunches, his skull dropping low. His words were low, choked, as he admitted that he had indexed pushed her. She would inhale sharply. Part of her had wanted to be wrong so desperately. He was only a few feet from her, but he might as well have been on the other side of the world. His harsh voice would wash over her, she had once found the sound to be soothing. He tried to apologize but there was no use. He claimed that he would never purposely hurt her. But he had pushed her. Thats all it came down to. He had pushed her. But now he wanted to help her. She would shake her head frantically. She didn't want him close to her. He had tried to kill her. Yet, part of her longed for his embrace, his touch, his comfort. He had always been there to take care of her when she needed it. "Why?" She would murmur, her voice shaky. Why had he done it? Why had he pushed? The blood that oozed from her chest made her woozy, she could barely focus on him, darkness continued to creep into the edges of her vision and it was becoming harder and harder to fight off. Deep down she knew that this was a fight they would never recover from. She would never find herself sleeping beside him without one eye open, she would never walk beside him without keeping one eye trained on him. Everything had shattered with a simple touch. Her mind would try and tell her legs to work, to lift her up so she could get home, but paws only slide uselessly against the earth, her legs like jello. She was stuck here. The realization of it began to dawn on her, coral gaze tipping upwards to search his face. Perhaps he would get his wish after all. "Speech"

She would collapse, pleading eyes boating into him as she demanded answers but he could give her none. Nothing he could say would ever make this right. Nothing he could do would make this better. Even as he offered to help she would frantically shake her head, trembling at the mere thought of his touch and at that realization he would slowly lift his head and sigh. This was it. She was done with him, he had gone too far across the line to ever come back, she had known it since she had tried to drag him down with her, he was only just realizing it now. A question would drop from her lips. Why.

That was the straw, the final one for him. He would turn his gaze back to her, eyes hurt but there was a hardness to them. "A woman came to the boarders looking for you, she said you force claimed her mate. I killed her for you. I brought you a queen so you could exact your revenge for her loosing your crown. Cataleya I would kill anyone who ever crossed you path... I have mentored your children, treated them with kindness and respect. I am sorry that my daughters death broke me but I expected you of all people to understand..." His breath was shaky but his words were not, he knew exactly what he was saying and though the very words burned his throat as they came up he couldn't stop, not now that he had gotten going. But still his mind would race as he looked around in search for any herbs he still might use to help her.

"I'm sorry I haven't been sound of mind but I have been there for you every step of the way. And yet you still treat me like I'm expendable to you. So go. Go to Basilisk or Neios or Bass or your brother or any other the other men you dangle in front of me every fucking day. I can't do this anymore..." A tear would slither from his eyes, already his vision getting blurry and this time not from the blood loss. "But despite all that I still fucking love you. I didn't realize you were that close to the edge and for that I can't even begin to apologize because nothing I ever say will be enough...." That was it... He was done... His shoulder would slump before he would attempt to stand, only to fail. Fuck. So much for his plan of a big speech then storming off... So instead he would settle for folding his ears to his head and looking away from her.

Even through the haze, she could see the hurt in his eyes. They had done more than just fall over the edge of the ravine. They had fallen off everything. When he spoke, she was confused. What woman? Though that didn't really matter, she was dead now. But whoever she was, had come looking for her mate that had been captured. He spoke of the past, of Sibelle. And then of her children, not their children. He had wanted her understanding. Had she not been understanding? She had given all the time in the world to pick up the pieces after his daughters death, she had said nothing when he failed to rule beside, she had said nothing when all he did was hide away and sleep beside their children. She had accepted it all. After a shaky breath, he would continue. And the truth would finally come out. Even through blurry vision, she would meet his gaze, or try to, as he repeatedly stabbed her with every word. He had never been expendable, nor would he ever be. [u]I can't do this anymore[/i]. How could five little words change everything? The world stopped turning, and she was certain that her heart had probably stopped beating, as the air left her lungs. She almost didn't hear the rest of what he had to say. He stilled loved her, and part of that registered in the back of her mind, but she still stuck on those five words. Her falling over the edge hadn't been on purpose, just a mistake, but it went in one ear and out the other. There was no masking the horror on her face. Ears pulled back against her skull, eyes watching as he struggled to rise, but to now avail. She couldn't stay here. Legs would pull beneath as she tried to rise, though it felt as though the weight of the world was weighing down on her, pinning her to the earth. She would sway on her feet, barely managing to stand on three legs. This was it. Everything they had was gone, just like that. Never had she imagined that they relationship could be so easily thrown away. With weary and uncoordinated steps, she would approach him, stumbling more than a few times. Blood continued to drip down her chest and forelegs, she was kinda surprised she wasnt dead yet. But she still sought to press her nose to his throat, just below the curve of his jaw, inhaling his scent for the last time. Her deep breath made her ribs burn and scream in protest, but she needed this, if this was truly goodbye. "I-I love you." She would murmur, eyes closing as she bathed in the heat that rolled off him. And then everything would give away, legs no longer held her up, everything around her went silent and the world went pitch back. Shallow breaths would barely provide her the oxygen needed to survive as she crumbled to the ground at his feet. "Speech"