ardent

Pain demands to be felt



Soliloquy

Somnium

age
3 Years
gender
Male
gems
182
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Large
build
posts
222
player
Novella
06-05-2015, 04:16 PM
ooc: So this isn't meant to be a light and friendly fight I'm afraid, just in case Soliloquy didn't quite get that across in his intentions in the post below. I'm willing to be a little lax on default times, I'm pretty busy with work so doubt I'll stick to three days myself but I'll try respond as quickly as I can and I ask that you do the same.

Soliloquy had ran out of land in the North, it could have been easy to march right into the icy seas and yet once he had found his solitude again he had turned away from the North to continue his endless walking. His mental health had long gone it seemed and his physical health was following suit, the unkempt coat, thinning figure and lack of adequate food and rest had left him quite the mess. Despite all of that his travels had led him roughly along his original path and he found himself once more in the battlefield.

Somewhere around here his blood had already tainted the ground, the rain had surely washed it away however and the layer of snow certainly covered it if not. He had plenty more blood to spill to make up for that though, his own and someone else's. He had come to accept the fact that sometime soon he would die and he deserved that fate, it just wouldn't be today and it wouldn't be during this fight. None the less, pain demanded to be felt and caused. He wouldn't beckon anyone to him though, simply watch and wait quietly for someone to appear.



Vitus

Loner

age
5 Years
gender
Male
gems
0
size
Large
build
Medium
posts
78
player
06-10-2015, 12:22 PM
He had trained, he had practiced, he had rallied, he had learned. This was the place to implement all of that. This was the place where it counted. The bird hovered above him, uncomfortable with the boy's choice of outings for today but unwilling to say anything against it. He knew all too well of Vitus' temper, the anger that boiled deep in his chest. He knew the best way for the boy to control it was to use it, and so he wouldn't speak against him. Vitus emerged in the battlefield a dark, unseasoned warrior. Training was vital, yes, but real contact would be his greatest lesson. Twotoned eyes spotted the stranger and he immediately began to size him up. The man was roughly his same height (it was hard to tell from more than twenty yards away) and looked to be maybe only slightly lighter in weight than Vitus (because the man looked starved from here). The stranger was obviously older, and was probably much more competent than Vitus - but at this point the Armada didn't care.

He approached slowly and with purpose, head falling into line with his spine in a more predatory stance. A low growl hovered in his trachea, but he waited until he was within five feet of the stranger to let it loose. He positioned himself directly in line with Soliloquy, knowing that as long as he could keep both eyes on the man, he was unlikely to miss a spur of the moment attack. His ears fell back over his head, and he drew his upper lip skyward to reveal pearly white fangs. Shoulders rolled forward instinctively as he purposely set his paws in a slightly wider stance than normal to allow for better balance. Claws dug into the earth for traction, and his tail extended out from his rump. He shrunk an inch or two as his legs bent, coiling beneath him while lowering his center of gravity. His eyes narrowed until the inner band of green was all that you could see., the skin around his optics bunched so that, if attacked there, he was slightly more guarded. His core tensed as he readied himself, knowing that there would only be a moment or two more before they would collide and blood would be spilled.

He wouldn't give the stranger the satisfaction of making the first move, though. In a sudden flurry, he sent his figure into forward motion directly toward Soliloquy. Their distance of five feet apart wouldn't give him a ton of room to maneuver, but he didn't need it. The skin around his face grew taut as his fangs gaped wide, teeth attempting to bare down on the flesh of Soliloquy's right cheek, right behind the point where the man's lips drew together in a point. He knew the skin would be thin there, and sensitive. Ideally, his jaws would draw closed with medium pressure, enough to rip flesh and tear a wound that would make his opponent hurt. His jaws in motion for this point, Vitus would attempt to simultaneously draw his right forepaw around the outside of Soliloquy's left forepaw and then back toward himself (Vitus) in hopes of pulling the leg toward him and off balancing the stranger. For this to work he would lift his leg upward, and so his weight would automatically redistribute among his other three limbs and tail. The last thing he wanted was to be knocked over.

Vitus versus Soliloquy for SPAR
I of ?


"Burn Baby Burn"


ooc; if anything is unclear, don't hesitate to contact me ^^
[Image: xqcOLtI.png][Image: dKno3bh.png]
[Image: Z6bvUpf.png?1]



Soliloquy

Somnium

age
3 Years
gender
Male
gems
182
size
Large
build
posts
222
player
Novella
06-11-2015, 03:45 PM
So many people came to the battlefield, he knew that it was only a matter of time before Soliloquy found himself approached. There was no need for a summoning call and sure enough he wouldn't have to wait long for someone else to appear. No words were needed to be exchanged then either, Soliloquy's desires were apparently clear enough and though he paid little attention to much of the young male before him now, Soliloquy knew that it was there and ready for a fight and that was all that mattered to him.

He allowed a small growl to rumble from his own throat in response, the only real question and confirmation that it seemed either would give before they truly readied themselves for this fight. Though he was definitely damaged, mind still apparently processed enough for him to set his defences. His stance widened, weight and balance distributed across all four paws, his knees bent, lowering his body and centre of gravity as his toes splayed, claws gripping at the earth beneath them. His head and tail both flicked into place to align his spine, shoulders rolling forwards and hackles lifting on end. His ears pinned back against his skull and his eyes narrowed, lips curling back, teeth exposed in a snarl as the skin around his features further wrinkled up.

Soliloquy probably would have liked that first move would have promptly sprung into action had Vitus not beat him to it. The close space between them meant that impact was made quickly, there was no waiting or faffing around, they had little choice but to leap straight into action though it didn't help for avoiding any oncoming attacks. Vitus's first attack met true, teeth sinking into the skin and Soliloquy actually relishing in the feeling of pain. The wound left behind was probably one that looked worse than it felt, though Soliloquy was hardly a sane judge of such things right now, and that moderate damage would need more care and attention than he was likely to give it.

The moment he felt Vitus's paw snaking around his own however, Soliloquy would shift the majority of his weight to his back legs and the supporting front right stablising him, allowing the left to be lifted by Vitus but do nothing to really unsettle Soliloquy's stance. Lunging his weight forwards now, Soliloquy attempted to strike the upper right side of Vitus's chest with the bony front of his left shoulder. The action would have benefited more from more movement and power, that much he knew though would still hopefully leave behind a mild bruise and if he was lucky unsettle the the blue male's balance slightly. It would hopefully buy him time as well to place his own left paw safely back on the ground and readjust his own balance again, after nearly stumbling from his shove attempt.

Now came his turn to include teeth in the matter, jaws seeking to bite the right hand side of Vitus's neck. The pressure applied was perhaps more than he needed for what ought to have been a friendly spar for the young boy's first fight though Soliloquy sought to give and take pain and right now in this moment aimed to sink in heavily, to grip and rip the flesh in hopes of leaving behind a deep wound on the boy's neck.


VITUS vs SOLILOQUY
SPAR
ROUND ONE OF TWO



Vitus

Loner

age
5 Years
gender
Male
gems
0
size
Large
build
Medium
posts
78
player
06-13-2015, 09:02 PM
His teeth fell shut on the thin skin of Soliloquy's right cheek, finding purchase exactly where he'd intended. It felt remarkably good to cause pain, much better than he would have ever thought. His attempt to swipe Soliloquy's paw out from under him was unsurprisingly unsuccessful, as his paw caught the opponent's leg somewhere on the lower third and succeeded in only lifting it and not pulling it toward himself as he'd intended. It was no matter, however, as at least his more detrimental attempt had met its' mark.

Due to their closeness, there was no room to weasel his way out of Soliloquy's forward motion and a deep, ebbing pain met him in the upper right quadrant of his chest. Soliloquy had thrust his shoulder into him and the impact, he deduced, had left behind a mild contusion that would most likely be a little sore when the adrenaline left his system. More importantly, the movement caused the majority of his weight to be thrust backward as the older man pushed into him. His back legs bent in response, coiling beneath him to receive the energy being dealt to him.

He wasn't used to being moved in such a manner, and so out of instinct he would release Soliloquy's cheek and tuck his chin down protectively. In that moment, Soliloquy's jaws would fall hard and fast upon the high right side of his neck, near the middle. There was pain there, enough to let Vitus know that at least three of Soliloquy's canine teeth had found purchase on his virgin flesh. He knew not what the opponent's intentions were, but he did know that he felt like he was in quite the predicament given that Soliloquy had managed to bite down on the side of his scruff.

In frustration and attempt to get the older wolf to let him go, Vitus' head tilted up slightly and to his left. His jaws aimed their next strike along Soliloquy's lower jaw, his bottom canine teeth intended to land on the inside of the bone nearest where it met the upper jaw while his upper canine teeth sought purchase a few inches above that within the skin that connects the lips. His intent was to bite down hard, putting immense pressure upon the jaw which would hopefully result in both pain and a potential fracture, and would ideally cause Soliloquy to let him go. If he got a decent enough hold, he would do everything in his power to keep it, and thus control Soliloquy's lower jaw.

The hours he had spent studying defensive tactics would pay off as he kept himself as on guard as possible throughout his movements. His ears laid back tight against his skull, tail and legs spread out to ensure his balance. His legs also bent an inch or two to lower his center of gravity and keep from locking any one limb. His chin lay tucked as much as possible, his eyes narrowed to slits just large enough to see out of. Claws dug into the earth as he sought traction. His shoulders rolled forward to bunch skin around his scruff while his jaws gaped wide, revealing sharp pearly-white fangs. His lips slid up and back to allow his fangs maximum exposure, while the skin around his eyes wrinkled to protect his necessary organs.

Vitus versus Soliloquy for SPAR
II of II


"Burn Baby Burn"
[Image: xqcOLtI.png][Image: dKno3bh.png]
[Image: Z6bvUpf.png?1]



Soliloquy

Somnium

age
3 Years
gender
Male
gems
182
size
Large
build
posts
222
player
Novella
06-16-2015, 07:51 AM
For a first fight Vitus had really thrown himself in the deep end selecting Soliloquy as an opponent. Of course he would come away learning things though he surely could have done so without such rough treatment for a simple little sparring exercise. In a better frame of mind, he probably would have commended the kid's efforts, especially for a first fight he was doing a good job at taking the pain and not giving up, even with Soliloquy's rough shove and jaw's clamping to his scruff. Now however all the white man could think about was any way he could cause more pain.

His defences remained in place, widened stance, balance evenly distributed and knees bent slightly, toes splayed and claws digging into the earth for better grip. His shoulders were still rolled forwards and hackles on end. Though his head was slightly twisted for placement of his bite, the rest of his body and tail still kept his spine as aligned as possible. His ears remained pinned back against his skull, those eyes narrowed and the skin around his features wrinkled.

With Vitus's attack incoming Soliloquy had a short second to make his decision, either hold on and grip harder or pull away. He decided to pull away in a jarring motion in hopes of tearing the skin further on retraction though it he wasn't quite quick enough in his reaction to save himself damage as well. Vitus's teeth had already made contact with his own skin, not quite in the placement they had been intended for, instead creating a rough line over the middle of the right hand side of Soliloquy's jaw, muzzle and lips as he aimed to pull his muzzle free. The resulting wound certainly stung, in the end not as deep as the cut further up his face though the thin skin in that area didn't need much to tear and bleed.

With his head now retreated, he aligned it back comfortably with his body to fully align his spine, lips once more curled into a snarl, tugging slightly at the injured skin though he ignored it, chin tucking in to fully protect his throat again. Knees would bend more now to lower him closer to the ground as he sought to take on a lower angle for his next attack.

Jaws would strike first, head angling to Soliloquy's right slightly so that he could aim to bite the soft flesh on the inside of Vitus's right shoulder, near the armpit as it connects to the chest. He would hope to sink in with yet another deep bite to cause the boy pain, pulling away moments afterwards, not lingering to grip this time. Adjusting his balance so that his weight settled more on his front left and two hind legs, Soliloquy then sought to reach his front right paw around Vitus's left front paw and try hook it back towards his own centre to unbalance Vitus. With both the right and left side of the body behind attacked, Soliloquy hoped that it was enough that the boy might topple over.


VITUS vs SOLILOQUY
SPAR
ROUND TWO OF TWO



The Judge

Administrator

age
-
gender
-
gems
10606
size
-
build
-
posts
1,979
player
06-20-2015, 07:14 PM

VITUS versus SOLILOQUY for SPAR



ROUND ONE

VITUS:
9 for clarity:

  • -1 “He positioned himself directly in line with Soliloquy...” Directly in line with what part of him? His face? His rump? Even if it seems obvious I can't assume.
4 for powerplaying.
  • -2 “...he waited until he was within five feet of the stranger to let it loose.” Did you and Eld decide this distance? If so you need to state it OOC and if not you need to attempt the positioning.
  • -2 “He positioned himself directly in line with Soliloquy...” All movements regarding your opponent need to be attempted.
  • -2 “...he sent his figure into forward motion directly toward Soliloquy.” Same as above.
10 for defenses.
  • +1 for each seen to max of 10
4 for attack.
  • +3 for bite
  • +1 for paw swipe
10 for injuries.
  • First round.

Vitus' round one total: 37/50


SOLILOQUY:
6 for clarity:

  • -2 “...jaws seeking to bite the right hand side of Vitus's neck.” Where exactly on his neck? It's a fairly large area.
  • -1 The damage from Vitus' bite could have been a bit clearer. Is the moderate damage just puncture wounds or tears or both? It's also up to you to decide where exactly damage on your character lands, so in the future I would suggest spelling out exactly what was done and where even if you're taking the damage exactly as your opponent intended.
  • -1 ...jaws seeking to bite the right hand side of Vitus's neck.” Whose right hand side?
8 for powerplaying.
  • -2 ”...jaws seeking to bite the right hand side of Vitus's neck.” With Vitus biting Sol's face I don't see how this move is possible. You either need to state your opponent failed to get a grip or attempt to break free before you attempt an attack like this.
10 for defenses.
  • +1 for each seen to max of 10
6 for attack.
  • +2 for shove
  • +3 for bite and +1 for grip attempt
10 for injuries.
  • First round.

Soliloquy's round one total: 40/50


ROUND TWO


VITUS:
4 for clarity:

  • -1 “Soliloquy's jaws would fall hard and fast upon the high right side of his neck, near the middle.” This could be a little bit clearer. Is it right below the jaw? 5 inches below the jaw? Vertical middle or horizontal middle?
  • -2 What kind of damage did Sol's bite do? Is it light, moderate or severe?
  • -3 for general lack of clarity. The wording in your bite attack in this post confuses me. If Sol is currently biting into his neck, why is Vitus tilting his head up to bite Sol's lower jaw? Which side of his lower jaw?
10 for powerplaying.
  • None seen!
10 for defenses.
  • +1 for each seen to max of 10
4 for attack.
  • +3 bite and +1 for grip attempt
7 for injuries.
  • -1 for light bruising on chest
  • -2 for moderate bite wound on neck (severity decided by judge)
Vitus' round two total: 35/50


SOLILOQUY:
6 for clarity:  
  • -2 What is the severity of the bite wound across Sol's face?
  • -2 “...head angling to Soliloquy's right slightly...” Is his head rotating in place or is it moving towards his right? If he's reaching towards his right, how can he be aiming a bite at Vitus' right shoulder if they're facing one another?
10 for powerplaying.
  • None seen.
10 for defenses.
  • +1 for each seen to max of 10
4 for attack.
  • +3 for bite
  • +1 for paw swipe
8 for injuries.
  • -2 for moderate lacerations to right side of face (severity decided by judge)

Soliloquy's round two total: 38/50

Totals:


VITUS: 72/100
SOLILOQUY: 78/100


And the winner is...


SOLILOQUY! Vitus must give up by either submitting, fleeing, or passing out.

Damage:

Vitus:
  • Light bruising (3 ooc days to heal)
  • Moderate bite wound (2 ooc weeks to heal)
Soliloquy:  
  • Moderate lacerations (two ooc weeks to heal)
Notes:


Tips for writing and some suggestions. (no points are deducted here):

For Andy: You lost the most points in clarity. A bit more detail overall would bring your score right up. While I definitely think you can have too much detail in a post, I also think it would be better to have too much than too little.

For Eldar: Your posts are good and clear, but they could definitely benefit from more detail. Even if something is understood (for example, where your opponent's bite was intended to land) I'd restate it anyway so there is absolutely no question as to what happened.

For both: You both could have benefited from more attacks in each round. There's a thin line between too much and too little, but in a spar it's worth it to experiment. Play around with complexity and try multiple attacks. Of course don't use the same body part twice in a post and blah, blah, blah, but you've got a whole body to work with! Try new attacks and be creative!

- By [Lazuli]