The man felt old, so horribly, horribly old.

Hell, Allen thought, he was old. He was what, ten years old now? Not only that, but he was alone. He’d never felt more alone in his whole life. His son was believed dead, his broken body discovered at the rapids… though Allen cursed himself now for not verifying. Had Bass found Noen’s broken form? Had he buried his dear delicate child? Besides that Nona was definitely gone… illness had taken her away. As for Alna, well, his little girl was missing. He had no idea if she was still alive or dead… and that scared him. Gods above that scared him.

When Allen approached Abaven’s borders today it was not to seek forgiveness. Allen had long since accepted that he couldn’t be forgiven. That his word meant little. Yet here he was. Here he was coming upon the plains as he’d once done so many times in the past. His friend, if he could still call Bass that, deserved to know what had happened. Why once more Allen had broken his word and became a traitor to Abaven yet again.

The thought made his heart heavy. Allen hadn’t wanted to do anything that might hurt Bass, Gods above he hadn’t wanted to hurt his friend! Weariness, mingling with worry, flashed across Allen’s face as he paused, setting his paw down slowly.

This was going to be no easy talk… but he wanted to at least make peace with Bass.

Before it was too late.

It didn't even feel like spring had arrived yet, even though the temperatures were starting to rise. The rain had slowed, a lot of the snow had already melted away from the lands of Abaven. But Bass still felt cold. After everything that happened in the winter he wasn't quite ready to welcome a new year. The warm sun hardly calmed his stiff muscles, a few more white hairs sprouting through his brown facial markings. Even though he still had a few good years left, he felt like the last season had aged him more than he had hoped. Two of his friends were dead, and his ex mate showed up and tried to act like everything was normal. He had screamed at her, had sworn his head off like some young, angst riddled teenager. He couldn't help it, the suppressed emotions from all those years when she had been away just boiled over and spilled over the sands between them. And then his daughter came to him with what felt like a mid-life crisis, making him feel even worse. Was it because he wasn't there for them through their lives? Sparrow seemed to resent him for having a pack and the pack itself. He didn't get that, didn't she see that he was doing this all for them? That was the one of the only reasons why he patrolled the borders today, why he got up every morning to do what he needed to do. This pack was his family, and if Sparrow couldn't see that... perhaps leaving the pack was best for her. Letting out a sigh, he crossed from the rapids into the plains once again, his eyes landing on a very familiar form sitting at his borders. Bass froze for a moment, on one paw he was happy to see that not all his friends were dead, but on the other... The man had once again disappeared without so much as a word, something that wolves in his life seemed to make a habit of. Taking a deep breath, he rolled his shoulders forward and closed the distance between the two. There was hardly any emotion on his face, just a tired and drawn out look coating his features. "Glad to see not everyone I know is dead. But how would I have known?" Bass asked as he approached, his golden eyes on the older man. He had to be the same age as Hansel was, and it was starting to show. While his words were hostile sounding, his own vocals were low and each word spoken slowly. He didn't want to fight, not again. He sat down at his oldest friend's side, looking over his lands from this perspective. He said nothing else, just enjoyed the warmth that radiated off of Allen. "Speech"

There was a hostile bite to Bass’ words as the other man approached, and Allen let him do so without moving. He knew that Bass likely scented him long before now… saw him before his aged eyes eyes caught the pale man’s form.

Allen dipped his head to his old friend, a form of respect that the man had for him even now. Even though Allen had made his mistakes, taking twists and turns through life, he still deeply respected his old friend. Bass had been a leader for Abaven for as long as Allen could remember and his friend for about that same length of time, right? It was not something so easy to throw away.

“I’m sorry, Bass.” Allen’s dark gaze returned back to the pale man as a soft sigh passed his lips. “But I’m… afraid that I come as a bearer of bad news all the same.” Allen closed his eyes, gathering his will to speak.

“I saw Noen’s body by the rapids one day, Bass. I lost it… I lost control of everything. I… I just ran.” There was a lump that had formed in his throat. “Nona and Alna came after me… and Nona… she…” Allen shook his head, opening his eyes again. Tears had begun to form within them as grief began to take over his form.

“My son and wife…they… they’re gone, Bass… There is no way Noen could have survived being twisted by the rapids like that… and Nona…” He gave a deep whine. “I don’t know where Alna is either. I’m lost, Bass… and I don’t know where I’m going anymore…” The older wolf looked away.

“I didn’t come for forgiveness…” He added. “But… you had the right to know…” It was here Allen fell silent, letting Bass digest the information he’d given him.

His ears slicked back when Allen spoke, of course there was more bad news. He could never have anything good these days. His teeth clenched as he worked his jaws ground together. The man sat in silence, waiting for the news to come as he gazed out at his territory. Sullenly he nodded, not sure what else he could say. He was upset that even after all his promises, he still ended up leaving him all the same. It was for a good enough reason, but that is why he was there. He was there to help support those he cared for and hoped that they would lean on him. But no, they all just wandered away from him. He didn't know quite what to say back at the moment, and instead opted out for being silent. After several minutes, a sigh finally left him as he turned to eye the aging man. "I'm sorry, Allen," he said softly before shifting his gaze to the horizon once more. He was sorry too, there was no lie in his voice. It was just that he was getting so much bad news, perhaps he was just at the age where wolves he knew started to pass away. But he hated it. Allen's kids were young, around the same age as his second litter if he could remember correctly. He couldn't imagine losing his own kids... it put everything into perspective for him. Would he look for shoulders to cry on, or hold it and not burden others? Allen had always been similar to him, so he had a feeling that that had been his mindset. His pale tail swished behind him slowly, another sigh pressing out of his lungs. This whole game of life sure did come with its ups and downs. "Thanks for telling me. I can't imagine what you have been through." Losing siblings was one thing, if they were alive or not, but your kids? It would break him in half. His golden gaze was sympathetic as he turned back to his friend, a hint of an apologetic smile on his lips. "Speech"

The brute listened to his friend as he apologized, though it was hardly Bass’ fault. Noen’s death had not been anyone’s fault… or if it was it was his own for not keeping a better eye on his son. He felt horrid, mentally and emotionally, but for now he was still plugging along in life. Things were not at all easy, but at least he was alive, right? He moved a bit closer to his pale colored friend, looking into those golden eyes with his own dark forest green ones.

“It’s alright my friend…” The calico brute managed a small, sad smile. “Even with all this bad news… there is a bit of good news to gladden this old heart of mine. You’re alive. Abaven still stands. It is a reason to keep smiling. To have hope. Who knows? Perhaps it will be Alna who shows up on your borders next.” Even as he said the words though Allen’s smile began fading.

“I’ve missed you.” Allen confessed. “It’s been hard… and I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately. I’m really glad that you’re still around, Bass.” He looked towards the lands beyond Abaven, giving a soft sigh of his own. “I’ll be lingering in the East. If you need me… or want to see me… just give a howl and I’ll come running.” The old brute shook his head before looking to Bass again.

“I won’t pretend things are the same… but my loyalty still runs with you. I will do whatever you ask.”

Bass let out a gentle sigh, leaning against the multi coloured man as his head twisted to eye him. There wasn't really much good news, not when he shared everything with him. His ears clung to his skull as he looked down at his pale paws. "There isn't much good news, Allen. Even though we are still here Abaven isn't thriving, we're just surviving. Nothing I do will bring up pack activity and I'm just tired. Wren came back only to disappear after I screamed at her. Hansel and Quelt have both passed away in the winter and I just..." he cut off, his shoulders shrugging in an empty manner. He didn't even know anymore. Why was he doing this? If it wasn't for there being so many wolves in his pack he would just call it to an end. They could all live here as they saw fit, but... it wouldn't truly be a pack. What was the point when no one seemed to care about it besides him? He wasn't sure, but he couldn't just watch his pack crumble to and end at his paws. Even though they weren't doing well, they were all still here. They could call these lands their home and not worry about anyone taking it. It was safe, and it was home. Bass knew that in a million years he wouldn't be able to just walk away from all of this. It had been their home for so long that he couldn't imagine having it just come to a close. Lifting his head, he turned to meet Allen's green gaze as he offered a hesitant smile to him. It was so hard, this whole game of life. Even though he had been down in the dumps for a little bit, he still had so many good memories here, a lot with the man at his side. It was odd that he was in the point of his life were he was literally looking back at the 'good ol' days', where had the years gone? So much had happened in what felt like the blink of an eye, and here he was at the tail end of it all. He wouldn't be here for too many more years, so he had better keep this alive and well for his kids and hopefully grandkids to care for. If anyone wanted it, that was. "Speech"

Abaven wasn’t thriving? It was just… surviving? Allen couldn’t believe what he was hearing. But that news about activity wasn’t the worst part of the situation. Hearing that Hansel, a male he did not know, and then Qualm caused his body to tense. “Quelt is… dead?” He asked softly, his gaze flashing with pain once more. He lowered his gaze, for a long moment before lifting it to look at Bass once more, speaking in a calm, clear tone.

“Don’t give up, Bass.” There was a spark in Allen’s eyes, a spark of life and fire. “Your pack needs you most right now. When things are at their bleakest. Don’t walk away from them. Stand strong, and show them that Abaven will overcome.” He offered his old friend a smile. “Things are tough, sure, but you’re not alone.” The calico-esc brute winked. “Maybe it’s time to start kicking some tails and getting the pack moving again, eh?”

His gaze shifted again, turning towards Abaven’s lands. They had been a home to him for so long… he let out a sigh. “I don’t know how you do it Bass… but I’m glad that you do. I’m sure there are those who appreciate what you’re doing for the pack, even if they haven’t been vocal about it. Keep fighting for your home, keeping it safe. Someone will recognize that effort… and work to do the same.”