Unhappy. Fel was, and had been, ridiculously unhappy since joining Aerie. The structure of the pack and the overall feel just weren't in line with who she was. For months she had tried to change herself, mold herself into what an Aerie wolf was supposed to be. In the end, she just couldn't. With Aureus dying, a crater had opened up within her and all of the negative feelings had filled that space. The woman had been wrecked by her brother's death. To the point where the normally well put together woman had become thin, her coat dull and dusty. Only recently had she begun to set her mind straight once more. That was all thanks to Azriel and Sibyl. The two wolves that she was determined to be with. The three of them wouldn't be happy together in Aerie, and so Fel would leave the family that she had left to create her own family. Pyrrhic would understand. Of this, she was certain. Eligos was the problem. They hadn't connected. It was strange and off putting. It was as though there was this huge divide between them. A chasm that was unable to be crossed. Fel possessed the supplies to build a bridge, but the effort had to come from both sides. No... She had to leave. For the sake of all that she was, the Abraxas fae had to separate herself from this tar pit of old memories so that she could be free once more. Fel would forever be there for her family. If they called, she would come running as though the hounds of hell were at her heels, but she couldn't keep going like this. Moving towards the edge of the lake, the silver streaked woman dipped to wet her throat before howling. Not only for Eli, but Pyrrhic as well. They both deserved to hear this from her lips. "Speech"

Pyrrhic trotted in at an easy lope. On his back was Pascal, his father's companion who he'd thought lost to the volcano at the time. Against the odds the battered macaque had managed to make it home finally. He'd had quite the story to tell and the toll the volcano had taken on him showed plainly and heavily on his now grotesque body. Pascal's skin was a mottle of scars and he was missing, either in part or in full, several fingers and toes. For his years of service and his dedication to the family, Pyrrhic now carried Pascal on his shoulders most of the time. Even Benkos who had always considered the macaque soft and weak couldn't sneer when faced with the hardships Pascal had suffered through simply to return home.

Spying Fel by the water's edge, Pyrrhic made a beeline for her. He was careful not to jostle the primate on the back too heavily as he trotted alone, but the ground was uneven and after feeling Pascal's fingers dig into his scruff Pyrrhic slowed to a walk. His brow furrowed in a question as he looked to his sister. He wasn't sure why she'd called and he was eager to find out why. "Fel? Everything alright?"

Considering the last time Fel had called for him, it was perhaps reasonable for Eligos to feel his stomach drop and his aching paws twitch to drive their dull claws into the ground when he heard her call for both himself and Pyrrhic. Oh, Fallen God, what now? Making an effort to smooth anxiously bristling hackles, he made his way toward her call.

The sight of their father's companion on Pyrrhic's back - and the state the primate was in - caused him to stumble a step in shock. Well, that couldn't be why she'd called for them, because he was with Pyrrhic, so there was more to this than the sudden reappearance of their father's companion. He tore his gaze off Pascal, took a beat to try to stem the sudden flow of memory that Pascal's presence forced out of him like blood from a wound that had been scabbed over. "What's wrong?" His voice was harsh and clipped, the shudder of pain throbbing in it all but buried beneath the control he slammed down over the wound. He had no illusions that this was a social call, though he entertained some spark of hope that she might actually be acting in the capacity of the rank she'd requested and reporting. To them both? Maybe - unlikely.

His gaze swept over her, firmly not squinting though the urge to do so was strong even this close up. She wasn't looking particularly good at the moment, though since he hadn't seen hide nor hair since Aureus' death - and not just because he hadn't seen anyone until recently - the effect was rather more dramatic for him. It was a concerning change, one that had seemingly taken some time to get to that state and, perversely, irritated him. She was part of the pack, she was his sister. They'd have taken care of her if she wasn't constantly running off, that was the whole point of being part of the pack. They'd just lost one sibling. They hardly needed to lose another to lack of proper care.

He shoved the illogical irritation down along with the equally illogical upwelling of grief Pascal had reawakened. He didn't know why she had called. She could be sick. She could have fallen into a pit somewhere and just escaped for all he knew. Though fi that were the case why she had called for just the two of them and not a healer he had no idea. He would hear her news and then insist she get looked over by Riva regardless of what it was. He fought the urge to pace, partly to cover his anxiety over being called like this and partly because the aching in his bones would just feel worse. Between the pain in his body and head, and all grief and trouble that had plagued his steps for seasons now, he couldn't seem to think straight.

Pyrrhic came first and the very sight of him brought her pain. He looked so much like Aureus... The fact that his appearance brought her pain brought her even more pain. It wasn't his fault. She pushed it aside and smiled at her much larger sibling as he drew in near. Her smile shifted as she noted the burned and battered macaque on his back. She tried not to let the concern for the creature flood her ruby eyes. She knew who he was... and his appearance made her feel so uncertain about her choice. So much loss... and yet here she was, being pulled in two directions. Pyr addressed her and the silver spattered woman forced a smile. "For the most part, yes." She would wait until Eligos arrived so that she could tell them both at once. In the meantime she rested her gaze upon the battered primate. "Pascal," she said softly in greeting. Dark ears pulled back against her skull for a moment, but shifted forwards again as the gold spattered form of Eligos drew near. Eligos' harsh words brought the woman's brow furrowing. There really was no softness in him. "Nothing is wrong. I have things to discuss and I wanted to tell you both at once." She noted the tense posture and the chaotic sort of energy pouring off of him. Canting her head slightly, she fixed him with her piercing stare. "Are you alright?" There definitely seemed like there was something wrong with him. He'd kept himself separate from the rest of them for a while and now that she was seeing him again, he was on edge and... just uncomfortable looking. She may have looked a little worse for wear, but her normal tenacity was still there. Fel was determined and it showed in her gaze which shifted back and forth between her brothers. "Since Aureus... I've been spending a lot of time away. At first it was just so that I could collect myself, but then I met someone." Would it be easier to say 'someone' rather than 'someone's'? "Two someone's actually." No reason to pretend. "They've both helped me heal and I've grown very close to them. Neither are pack wolves..." And now came the hard part. "And so I wish to leave Aerie. I want to travel with them, possibly have a family in the future." This whole thing was stressful and Fel raised a paw to rub her face in exasperation. "I've never been as happy and content as I am when I'm with them. They are what I need." Could they understand that? Could they forgive her for abandoning them again? Both should be able to see that she didn't fit in here. Fel was different and that difference made things difficult for her. "Speech"

His sister's reply did nothing to ease his concern. If anything it only added to his questions. Pyrrhic gave her a questioning look but said nothing, knowing she'd explain herself in time. Likely she didn't want to repeat herself if she had the same thing to say to Eligos. It was the sort of thing he would do if he had something to say, and it stood to reason that Fel might be of a similar mindset. She didn't appear to be in distress or acting under any other stripe of urgency, and it wouldn't kill him to be patient.

Eligos arrived and was quick to voice the same concern, prompting Fel to launch into an explanation. His gaze flicked to Eligos as Fel asked if he was alright, but even though he wondered too Pyrrhic opted to remain silent and let Eligos answer when the time came. It wasn't his place to share the things he knew. The quick mention of Aureus stung him; but time really was the ultimate healer of wounds and the heartache he felt was manageable now somehow. Knowing he was surrounded by wolves who shared his grief and knew his pain enabled Pyrrhic to swallow hard, accept what he felt, and remain grounded in the present. He would never forget his brother or his father, and he had no qualms with admitting he might never get over their losses, but he would live with it.

Pyrrhic's ears pricked in surprise at the mention of two. Non monogamy wasn't exactly a new idea for him. He himself had no qualms with taking another spouse should the opportunity present itself, but he would consider it purely for its procreation benefits. As a male (and as an Abraxas) he could father multiple litters a year and would benefit from multiple partners for that reason. Fel, being female, could not, and the lack of utility was why he had never considered any of his sisters or female relatives having multiple mortal partners at the same time before. It just didn't make sense from a practical standpoint. But did the lack of practicality deserve his ire? Probably not. The idea that his sister might be a one brood bitch in a pair for a mortal male, however, did so he waffled on a reaction. He didn't know enough to be outright affronted so he kept his emotions close and did his best to sort them out with what little information he'd been given. If it was two females, fine, two males...? Pyrrhic would be stewing on this for awhile, that was for certain.

His uncertainty on the topic of Fel's love life aside, the revelation that she wanted to leave garnered an immediate reaction. Pyrrhic jerked back as thought struck. That did sting. They were a family and his first reaction was to feel as though she was leaving them. Rejecting them. For that reason he started with trying to get her to stay. He had to, didn't he? She was his sister and he would fight for her. "If they aren't pack wolves," he said slowly, trying to come up with a reasonable compromise that didn't involve Fel leaving, "Why can't they come here? Join our family? That way if you decide to start a family you have us to lean on."

Eligos blinked as she turned the question around and asked him what was wrong. The general aches and headaches he'd been having were so constant that he didn't really think of them as wrong at this point. It was just going to be life niw that he had his sight back. "Just a headache," he temporized, then shook said aching head to dismiss it. They hadn't come here to discuss his health, nor judging by the fact that Fel had called and not Pyrrhic were they here to discuss Pascal, so he set aside all of the above and foxed her with a stare of readiness.

Perhaps the stare was readier than he, because her words struck him like a slap to the face. First of all, someones? Second of all... raising Abraxas pups outside of the family? Third of all... what the fuck?

For a moment he couldn't drag himself out of his own shock to formulate words, but then that hurt crystallized in his chest and his expression hardened. "Leaving again? After you swore that this time you were here to stay? Aureus put himself forward as surety that you would stay! I suppose you expect us to be grateful you didn't take off the moment he was dead, to be with your mortal mates." There was a sharp snap to his words, clipped and furious despite a closed expression. "So tell me, Fel, why is it that you are willing to break your word for a harem of men? Is sex that important to you that yiu would prioritize it over the Abraxas or is there something more? What is so terrible about being with your family that you would prefer their company to ours? To raise your children as if they were mortals like their fathers, instead of among their family as they should be?"