The familiar warmth of her mate had contributed to the best sleep Zee could remember having in seasons. It was almost like she was back home, tucked away in their ocean-side den and waiting for their children to inevitably wake with the sun to begin their day. She inhaled deeply, expecting the salty sea air to tickle her nostrils and startling to alertness when the scent that reached her was dried blood. Panicked eyes shot open and she tore from his arms, half expecting it to have been one of her captors laying beside her. Autumn was her season, and more than once she had awoken to an unfamiliar male nearby who intended to take advantage of the in-heat slave. Her teeth were bared towards him and she pressed herself up against the inner wall. When the recognition hit, the fire in her eyes was replaced by dull confusion. "You're still here." Zee told him, unsure if it was meant to be a statement or a question. She almost asked him what had happened, but the scent of death still permeated the air, and his thick black coat was still flaked with blood. Her brows knit and she dropped her gaze back down to her paws, squinting down at her dulled claws while she tried to work through the realization. "Speech"

As the night grew long, Sirius grew groggy, head musty with the need to sleep. He didn’t know how long had passed when he felt his eyes start to close, and his head fell the last of the way to the ground with a soft thunk. The thunk was all he needed to return him to alertness. Eyes creaking open as he shook his head as gently as he could, trying not to wake Zee. He could do this. He could hold her, watch over, and keep her safe. From enemies without, and from himself. He was jolted awake some time later by a sudden, jerky motion. His eyes flew open and he gasped in shock. He had fallen asleep, he had hurt Zee in her sleep, this was her dying throes-- but reality clicked into place before his thoughts could travel too far. Zee was awake, and frightened, and very much alive. Pressed against the inner wall. “Did I… did I hurt you?” he asked softly, not moving for fear of scaring her some more. “I tried to stay awake” "Zee" & "Sirius"

His question confused her enough that Zee's head lifted once more. "No, Sirius." She meant to sound reassuring, but the words were clipped and robotic. "You haven't hurt me in.. years." The injury to her neck was so long forgotten, and while it had scarred over thickly her long fur always seemed to shift over it enough to hide it. She couldn't truly remember the last time she'd needed to fear Sirius' teeth while she slept beside him - so why was it something he was concerned with? His words of the night prior tried to come back to her, but she lifted a paw and scratched at her ear as if it could keep the memory at bay. His reappearance had been overwhelming, painful and confusing. Sirius had entered her prison den a monster, collapsing into an emotional puddle, and had flooded her with .. well, she couldn't remember the entirety of his confession, but it was a lot to take in. Regardless, it was clear now that between his shameful reaction and the faint recollection of last night, he'd hurt someone. She squinted into his eyes, suspicious and unsure. "Speech"

The Warlord grimaced at the reminder of how much he had regressed after her ‘death’. He pushed it aside, he could not afford to reflect too deeply right now. Could not let the last six months flood him. He had to figure out what was going on here. He could only hope that the blood lust had not truly killed every single wolf that was a part of this. They needed answers. They needed to know why Zee was taken, and why she had been held for so long. If they had planted the seed of her death, and why. He had to ensure her future safety. “By the aches of my body and the smell of blood, I have to assume this is real. For now, let us act as if that is so. Zee.” Gods, it felt strange not to say her name. He had raged at those that had spoken it to him, and the wounds it pricked at. “Zee,” he said again, for the novelty of it. “I need to search for a med kit, and I will need help with my wounds. I will need food, I lost a lot of blood last night.” He had been delirious when he had curled up with Zee. Perhaps he still was. Perhaps all of this… no. no, that way lay madness. "Zee" & "Sirius"

She had been waiting for him to explain away his fear, had filled the silence with her own imagined replies. Would he admit again that he'd harmed someone? Was it someone they both had loved? Did they survive the tear of his sabers, as she had? Or would he make himself an excuse for it, to reassure her that he was not always wearing the face of the monster that had slaughtered her captors? She waited and watched, but the response never came. Zee hardly had time to condemn him for the deflection, for her inquisitive train of thought derailed as he began to instruct her. This was something she could do - thoughtless and easy and familiar. Her gaze pulled away from his and she dipped her head in a slow subservient nod. Zee pushed off the inner den wall and headed past the direwolf toward the doorway. Med kit, food. Not the most outrageous of requests. She meant to cross the threshold with some semblance of confidence, though the blatant gore of the outside world hit her harder then she could have ever expected. Zee's head turned away sharply, tucking her nose into her own shoulder as she resisted the urge to hurl. Looking past her fur she could see the wounded direwolf waiting to be led, and it was only to keep him from remaining on his feet too long that Zee pushed herself to continue out the door. The winds had been kind, the majority of the carnage had been covered by a thin blanket of snow. Muzzles and paws and tails occasionally poked free, and Zee found herself stepping slowly to avoid what she could of the frozen bodies. She led him towards the medical tent and paused out the door, turning back towards Sirius to motion him forward. "Med kid would be in there." She commented, struggling to sound indifferent. The healers had been kind enough to her - if she crossed the threshold, would she find their bodies as well, or had they fled and escaped their deaths? "Speech"

He bit back a growl at the subservient nod. He had finally got his Queen out of that sort of behaviour, and now she had fallen right back into it. These people… dammit. A ripple went through the Warlord. Rage and confusion at the clashing of two worlds, the numbing understanding of where she had been this whole time. What she had likely suffered. Had they touched her? Had they hurt her, forced her? He could feel the madness pushing at him again, his vision clouding with rage. He didn’t see the way she hesitated at the door, at the way the scent of death hit her. Likely, that was a good thing. If he had, the rage would have truly consumed him. How dare she show a licker or anything but hate to those that had held her. Anything but victory at the smearing of gore that coated their camp. His Wife moved cautiously across the newly fallen snow, and the Warlord moved slowly behind her. The ache of lying down after heavy fighting, and leaving his injuries unattended was not treating him kindly today. Anger still rolled through him as he nodded his head briskly, not trusting himself to speak as he moved through, looking back to ensure Zee didn’t go anywhere as he looked through the medbay for what he needed. He found bandages and clean water, but he left the herbs. He didn’t have enough wherewithal to make the careful decision on picking out herbs he would barely recognise in the first place. He cleaned what he could reach of his wounds, hissing as he scrubbed across them. “Zee, come in here and reach the back of my neck” he commanded, glancing back again to see she still had not entered the room. Why did she hesitate? He grunted, and kicked one of the bodies on the floor, shoving it under a bench out of her way, remembering the way she had walked gingerly across the field to this place. "Zee" & "Sirius"

Zee waited quietly in the snow, staring down at her paws to avoid catching sight of the rest of the gore around her. She rocked her weight back and forth, watching how as her paws sunk deeper, they carved out new shapes around her claws. It hadn't taken long of being captive for her to re-learn the ability to distract herself, to stand quietly and obediently without a wandering gaze or a faint expression of boredom. She was too focused, for when Sirius barked out his command she flinched like she'd been hit by lightning. Without a second thought she sprinted through the doorway, approaching him abruptly and without hesitation. Sirius was kicking away a body and Zee skittered to the side away from where it fell, finding her gaze lingering too long upon the bloodied muzzle and still-open eyes. Once more she was reminded that the one who'd slaughtered these wolves was standing before her, having issued a command and awaiting her responding action. She forced her attention back to him, reaching her muzzle cautiously towards his to gingerly retrieve the moss from his jaws so she might be able to scrub his neck for him. "Speech"

He was watching his Wife, and he noticed the moment she flinched. Watched it roll over her in a way that set his teeth on edge. It was the most foolish thing but he wanted to snap at her until she stopped shying so easily. He wasn’t so far gone as to realise he would only worsen the problem. She bolted into the room, and he lowered himself so she could reach the spot more easily. “Zee.” he said. The word a command also, but a softer one. “We need to talk. We need to talk about what happened to you. Why were you brought here? Did they ever say? What did they do to you.” She was so skittish, so fragile. He didn’t have the sanity, the deposition for kids gloves. He didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t treat her like glass, and he feared she would shatter under his handling. He didn’t want this frightened creature. He wanted his Zee back. With her snappish remarks and eyeroll for his drama. Where was the wolf that had hunted tigers to get pillows back for the Empress? The wolf that had laughed at him when he had fallen into the pond. The wolf that had stood her ground when he wanted children until he proved his worthiness. The wolf that had stood at his side in the Armada, a leader, not a slave. He was selfish, so selfish, to need and want her strength despite what she had been through. But he needed that wolf so badly, to help guide him through this. The worst part was, if this had been any other of their wolves, he would have turned to Zee in support of how to handle them. He was the murderer, she was the guide. "Zee" & "Sirius"

Zee's teeth clenched around the moss and she scrubbed harder, some small way of releasing her anger without doing it in defiance. His wounds needed cleaning, and perhaps if she cleaned them hard enough the warlord would be forced to shut up and drop his questioning. Some part of her recognized the necessity of knowing her captor's intentions, though the rest she had no intention to answer. Not now, at least. "They told me nothing." "Zee answered simply, spitting out the moss when the wounds were clean and taking a seat beside him. What was next? Did they head for home, or did Sirius intend to determine exactly how broken she was and leave her here if she was beyond repair? Her lips pursed and she shifted, leaning the side of her head into his fur gently before she remembered there was still more he had asked of her. Zee took a moment to sink into his warmth and familiarity, before pulling herself back to her feet and stomping perhaps a bit too hard out towards the door. "They keep the food in a cellar here somewhere." "She called to him over her shoulder. "Speech"

Nothing. He gritted his teeth but didn’t push again. He was swaying between anger, exhaustion, and confusion. It was delirium, from the long run, the fighting, and the bloodloss. At least he no longer believed her to be a ghost. She was real, and there would be consequences for that. She leaned against him, and for a moment he closed his eyes, imagining, imagining that they went back a year. A year, with fresh pups in the den, and Zee leaning against him. Warm and safe and home. The image was too painful, and he was almost glad when she lifted her head again. He had learned in the last six months that living in the past was a dangerous allure. She began to move away, and he followed like an invisible line tied them together, never letting them drift too far apart. She led him towards the cellar, with the promise of food. He was starving. “Do you remember much of what I told you last night?” he asked as they reached the storage. They had both been a little… unfocused then. But he needed to push forward. He needed… he needed… His breathing quickened as he tried mentally to stop two worlds colliding, even as he knew it’s inevitability. "Zee" & "Sirius"

Zee paused outside the cellar, waiting for him to take the lead within as she had with the medical tent. He could eat what he wanted, and then they could leave. Or at least, she hoped they could leave. It wasn't long before he was questioning her again, and her head craned down towards the snow tiredly. "You buried my body, mine and Azure's. Our kids took it hard." Her words caught, stumbled over, you hurt someone, and she sighed. "Can't we just go home, Sirius?" It was too much for her here, surrounded by the bodies of those who had once hurt her. Questioned by her rescuer, her mate. The memories stung, and she found herself desperately yearning to hold her children. It seemed more and more like the world around her was real - she wasn't a ghost, wasn't living a nightmare. If this was still Boreas, she wanted to go home. "Speech"

She was tired, and mentally worn. He could see that, hear it. But her dismissive words made him wish to snap. Or perhaps it was the way his heart was held taut inside of him, stretched, and ready to snap. “No, Zee. That is not all. I went off the deep end. You’ve seen, in our life together, snippets of what I can be, who I can become. I bit Briar, in almost the exact place I bit you. She healed, but it means my terrors are back. I am no longer safe in my sleep. I… I hurt tamsyn, mentally, I scared her, because I could not forgive her for forcing me to live without you. Before we can go home, you have to face that it isn’t the place you left, Zee. I believed you died, and I was not sane without you. Your strong Zee, I know you don’t feel it right now, but please, just... listen, a moment. Listen, so you know what you're going home to.” He could not, would not, drag her home and let her find this all out for her own eyes. To see it, and understand it. He had to prepare her first. He closed his eyes, feeling the exhaustion himself. He was holding himself back, keeping himself in check. He had to tell her. If he brought her home, he would not let her leave again. He could not. "Zee" & "Sirius"

It had been hard to draw forth the courage to ask him to take her home, and he'd shut her down quickly. Insisting home had changed, and she needed to know what she was going home to. It was a stupid thought - home could be a lake of fire now and she'd still choose to return there then to stay in this ravaged camp. She did not argue it further. He spoke and Zee listened, reminded of the confession he'd spilled not minutes after he'd found her laying in her nook awaiting death. This time she was more willing to listen, though the words did not hurt any less hearing them a second time around. The admittance frustrated her, and for a fleeting moment she'd wished she'd have admitted to him the hell she'd suffered here, merely so he could see the clarity of how little she cared of whether he was safe to sleep beside. Her eyes closed again, and she felt the anger bubbling up inside her and shoved it down with as much strength as she could muster. Just when she thought the defiance had been swallowed, it spit back up again faster then she could realize. "Okay, I've listened. Your night terrors have returned. My friend tried to force you to move on and you punished her for it. You fucked up, probably left the mark of your rage on every pack member, tree, and boulder in the plains." Zee's tail slashed through the air in annoyance, her lips threatening to curl into a snarl. "Now you listen. I don't care - I don't care where home is or what home is, because it's not here and I don't want to stay here any longer!" She didn't realize she'd started to yell, not until the echo returned to her across the snow. Her teeth gritted together painfully and she turned away from him, shutting her eyes hard to hide the tears that threatened to spill over. "Speech"

Her anger was like the rising sun. The cowering, obedient girl she had fallen was chased away by that building frustration. He stopped what he was doing, and looked at Zee, truly looked at her in a way he hadn’t been able to since finding her alive. Every ragged inch of her, from her quivering paws, to her firmed shoulders and glowering eyes. Mine. he thought softly. She was still in there, dampered down, but not beaten. Whatever those fucking bastards did to her, they had not broken her. He stood a little taller, grabbing the food he needed, and chowing down quickly. “As my Queen commands.” he agreed softly, not daring to add the smile he wished to at the end of it. He brushed lightly against her as he turned away from the food and moved towards her and the exit of the cellar again. He wasn’t by a long stretch, but tending to his wounds and feeding his belly gave him a little more strength to press on. It was more than one days journey home, he could put it off a little longer. He could tell her, far from here, from the stretch of blood, and the closing walls that had held her for so long. There was… one last thing he needed to tend to. He grabbed what he needed from the supplies in the cellar, and started his plan there. Striking a flame with their own kit in the corner of the room, and placing fur coats in a way that would make them easier to burn. As he did so, he swore, and tossed one to the side and moved quickly about the room. He had almost forgotten. Where was it, where was it? There. He grabbed her king cheetah coat and tossed it over his back, letting the flames slowly grow behind him. “Come, my Queen, the exit is this way” he said, knocking his head gently against her before taking the lead. "Zee" & "Sirius"

Zee remained seated and turned from her mate long past her burst of anger. She felt him brush against her as he moved into the cellar, heard his words and shook their meaning away. He shuffled around down below, eventually emerging with the scent of smoke on his tail. The understanding of what he did clicked then, and she moved to look at him again as he passed her by. Zee stole a glance down into the cellar, watching the flames quicken and spread, and then moved to follow. It wasn't until a few minutes later did she remember. She stopped suddenly, whipping around and slapping Sirius with her tail in the process. Without a word, she headed back into the now burning territory. I never named them. Zee realized, horrified. Years spent dutifully on her shoulder and she'd never given them a name. Didn't think it would ever matter, but now, her companions might be burning alive and she couldn't even think of how to call out and get their attention. They may have died days, or weeks, or months ago.. but she'd not bothered to wonder on their lives once escape was close enough to taste. What if her captors had left them alive, to try and retrain and utilize? After all, they were as experienced in battle as their alpha master was.   The scent of smoke was suffocating, second only to the singed fur and charred flesh that quickly followed. Her heart pounded hard in her chest, every muscle in her body screaming to run. The broken queen stood frozen in the middle of the burning camp, spinning in half circles and craning her neck upwards and downwards to glance into the dens - not the least bit sure of where she should search first. "Sirius!" She called, her ears pulling flat against her skull in shame. "M-My viper, my toucan!" The fire was spreading, the trees within the camp popping audibly and spitting hot sap. Occasionally something would hit her - a spark, a coal, she didn't look to see - and she merely flinched away, hoping to catch a sound or a scent that would lead her to her faithful companions. "Speech"

He led her away from this place with the intention of letting it burn to the ground. Every last trace of these people would be gone. Their bodies burned as they had tried to trick him into thinking Zee’s had been. It was a poetic justice that would also help ensure there were no survivors. He didn’t notice Zee start until she was turning, her tail flicking across his face. She was heading back further into the compound, where the flames would be slowly growing. Sirius! she called, but he was already beside her. Just about prepared to knock her out and drag her from this burning place by his teeth. Shit. He realised when she called out again, and he realised the reason for her distress. The fire was growing, and sparks singed the two wolves. He turned to Zee, a fearsome growl on his face. “ Leave!” he bellowed angrily. “Get to the exit it, or so help me Zee I will knock you out, drag you, and leave them to burn. I will save them. Go!” he wasted precious seconds until she complied. Holding his ground so she would know the seriousness of his resolve. Once she did, he turned, and dove further into the compound. Finding the feeling of burning pawpads eerily familiar. So close, so close to the day he had found her corpse. He snarled, angry with himself as he almost froze, tossing away the memories. He needed to remember something else. He borrowed into the beast inside of him, remembered the raged carnage he had delivered just the day before… there. He remembered seeing a cage as he had murdered their caretaker. He changed direction and plowed ahead faster, ignoring the scent of burning flesh around him. "Zee" & "Sirius"

While a large part of her wanted to ignore his command, to stay and to help rescue the creatures that were dear to her... she knew better then to test Sirius' threat. He would leave them behind to burn, she knew that in her heart. Obediently she turned her back on the flames, rushing out of the smoke and back into the deeper snow that bordered the camp. Her head hung and she coughed, expelling the painful burning sensation best she could. Minutes passed, and she curled herself into a ball in the snow. Would Sirius reappear? This was the first moment he'd truly left her since he'd arrived - and had this all been some terrible dream then surely she'd find his skeleton in the morning. She'd be forced to bury him as he buried her. Her tail came up and covered her muzzle as was habitual for her in this position, the fur shielding her eyes from the lingering smoke, but allowing space to peek through at the exit. She remained there quietly and obedient, watching for movement and evidence that he'd emerge unscathed. "Speech"

He hissed as he found the right room. Fire licked at the edges, the entire door was ablaze. He stopped and backtracked. Not to leave - he had made a promise to Zee. he would rescue these creatures, or he would die trying. That was the cost of securing her promise to leave. Taking a steeling breath he shook off her coat, so he wouldn't risk it to the flames. With space between himself and the door he charged, hitting the burning wood hard with his shoulder, and feeling his fur catch on fire. Flames danced on his flesh as he went crashing into the room. The burning door beneath him. Pain in his paws. He howled as he threw himself to the side, rolling on the floor, once, twice, thrice, until the flames went out. He got to his paws slowly, panting, and found the frightened gaze of her companions. He found the contraption that held the cage closed, and lifted it free. The snake he grabbed in his maw and tossed onto his back. Hissing at the pain of contact on his charred flesh. The bird hopped onto his back on its own free will. Turning, he barrelled back out of the room. Made easier for the open doorway. Snagging the coat in his mouth as he moved. Muttering softly under his breath something about stupid winter cheetahs... By the time he made it back to Zee he was battered and alternating between panting and whining. He dropped down beside her, giving her companions a chance to move from his back to hers. He also needed a second to catch his breath. “We need to leave, the snow should help… help contain this.” He panted, but he couldn’t risk it if this got out of control. No choice but to push on. “Help me up” he gasped. "Zee" & "Sirius"

She hardly had enough time to worry for him before his inky black coat was visible through the smoke. Zee's head lifted, her ears perked hopefully forward as she watched the behemoth approach. Once he was securely out of the flames, she moved to meet him. Collapsing in the snow beside him and shoving her nose into the fur around his neck. Her viper and toucan smoothly transitioned off his back and onto her, and she made a mental note to find fitting names for them when they made it home. "Thank you." She whispered, unmistakably grateful. Having some part of her old life back was comforting, grounding. Her viper curled tightly around her neck and lost himself amidst the fur there. The toucan's familiar talons grasped tightly around her shoulder blade to balance himself as she stood. For a moment she was simply happy, and then her mate's pained words reached her. "Help me up." The fire had obviously harmed him, though Zee found herself choking on her apologies. If he hadn't gone back in to save them, he'd be fine.. but they'd be dead. She bit her lip, leaned down and braced him with her small shoulder to try and assist him to his feet. "Can you walk?" She asked, feeling stupid for even asking the question. He had to be able to walk, else they'd be stuck here, starve or succumb. "Speech"

He nodded his head once at her words. They were hers, and held a part of her heart. He had rescued them as a gift for her. Once he had promised her the world, now he simply struggled and shoved through it to give her a tiny piece of happiness. When her companions were settled, she leaned down and offered him the support of her shoulder. He leaned against her and climbed back to his paws again. He felt bruised and battered, and he could still smell the fading scent of his burnt flesh. The second time he had gained burning wounds because of Zee. “Yes.” he said shortly at her question. He had no other choice on the matter. At least he had had the wherewithal to grab some supplies before lighting the cellar on fire. Panting softly, he began to move away from the compound, Zee beside him. He had been to the North a few times, but he found himself disorientated with the snow and the smoke. “Where's Azure’s damn bat?” He grumbled "Zee" & "Sirius"