ardent

What Hurts The Most



Gael


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07-02-2013, 07:07 PM (This post was last modified: 07-03-2013, 12:08 AM by Gael.)


No. No. No. His grandfather had passed away. Cairo wasn't blood related to him, since his father Collision had been adopted by the russet man, but that didn't mean he wasn't family. His grandfather had been the Adravendi Patriarch. The guardian of Valhalla, the founder of his family. And he was gone. Mother nature had taken back the russet man. The young man was no stranger to the circle of life, to the cycle of birth and death, but that didn't mean that it wouldn't hurt. He hadn't spent much time with his grandfather as a pup, so his memories were limited, but it still hit home with the young Adravendi that one of his oldest family members was gone. Dead. Passed away. No longer breathing. So many had appeared at his Cairo's deathbed, all of them just as taken aback by his sudden departure, all of them mourning the passing of one of the greatest men that had ever lived. Gael had been one of the first ones on the scene, one of the first to announce the death of Cairo to the world. Though nearly the first one there, he had come to late. The russet man had taken his last breath before the young man had been able to get to him. He hadn't been able to say his goodbye. Cairo was gone and he never got to tell him how he loved him, despite barely having spent any time with him. Gael would never forget himself for that. He would never forget that moment. It would forever remained engraved in his mind.


Thunder boomed across the land, shaking it to its very core, lightning striking the darkened heavens, illuminating the sodden earth for a few minutes before plunging it back into darkness. Mud spattered paws beat heavily against the muddy earth, powerful limbs carrying the young brute towards the lake. He had been so stoic at his grandfather's death bed, the silent tears rolling down his face and yet no one had been of the wiser, the pouring rain disguising his heartfelt display of emotion. And yet he couldn't take it. He couldn't take looking into the still face of his grandfather, into the lids that would never open again. It had been too much for the young man who had never experienced tragedy in his life before. And so he'd taken his leave, needing to find solace, to have time to himself to come to terms with what was happening. A part of him couldn't believe that it was really happening. It couldn't be. This had to be some kind of nightmare that his mind was conjuring up for the fear that his family would reject him after been gone for so long. But he had seen Cairo, seen the stillness of his body, how he hadn't responded to the touches of the white women that enveloped him. Cairo was dead. And there was no going back.


Cerulean gaze spotted the lake up ahead, it's usually clear water now dark and murky, matching the mood of its surroundings. Muddy water splashed around his legs as he came upon the shore, stopping just short of the water. The rain was relentless, pounding mercilessly against him, soaking him to the bone, matting his usually pristine looking coat. But he didn't care. He could catch a cold for all he cared about in that moment. His grandfather was dead. Did Collision know yet? If he didn't, the young Adravendi would track his father down soon to break the news to him, something he knew would fall hard on his own father. Cairo had taken his father under his wing after all, which had to mean that Collision had to have an insane amount of love for his adopted father. How he wished things could've been different. What would happened to Valhalla now? Chrysanthe was the new alpha...His aunts...His uncles...Did they know about their father's passing? If they didn't, he was sure they would find out soon enough. Silver crown was dropped, lids falling shut over cerulean pools, audits lying flat against his skull, ivory tipped whipcord limp against his hocks. Rain poured down on him, dripping from everywhere and anywhere. How could this have happened...



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Meili


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Athena I
07-02-2013, 07:56 PM



The crash of the thunder and flash of lightning made the multi-hued fea jump with surprise. Meili sighed as she peeked out from the protection of the tree, looking unhappily at the sky. The storm seemed to come out of nowhere and the shade of the tree was the best protection she could find. Ever since their last meeting, Meili had been hanging around the areas near Gael's pack, just in case he could get away to spend some time with her. She was still learning her way around the area, but she had been staying near the lake for a while since it was an easy source of water and food. She turned her teal gaze toward the lake, turned dark from the storm, watching the rain hit the surface of the water. She gave a little shiver from the chill of her soaked fur. The tree leaves could only block so much of the rainwater and she was still soaked to the bone.

Just as she was about to give up on her post and try to find a better shelter, she heard the thud of paws hitting the muddy ground. The rain made it impossible to catch the wolf's scent, but something made her look up in time to see a wolf that she could have sworn was Gael. She blinked with surprise. Why in the world would Gael be out here in the storm? He should be back home with his pack where is was safe. She shook her head, that couldn't have been Gael. Still... it really did look like him. She stepped out from under the shelter of the tree, watching the brute run toward the edge of the lake. After she got a second look at him she knew without a doubt that it was her sweet Gael.

He stopped on the shore of the lake and she ran over to him, padding around in front of him so she could face him. "Gale! Gale..." she called as she approached him, her heart sinking in her chest at the sight of him. He was an absolute mess with his muddy paws and soaked, matted fur. He looked absolutely lost. "Gale..." she whispered as she nuzzled his neck and rested her head along his shoulder blade, keeping him close. She didn't ask what was wrong or what had happened yet, she just wanted him to know that whatever it was she was here for him.

"Speech."



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07-02-2013, 08:20 PM (This post was last modified: 07-03-2013, 12:07 AM by Gael.)



Part of him felt like he could stay here forever, rooted to his spot in front of the lake, never to move again, simply to allow himself to waste away until he too finally rejoined the earth as well. He should've have been as torn up as he was. He barely even knew the old man for pete's sake, and yet the young man couldn't help but feel torn apart. All of Valhalla would be thrown into mourning with the passing of his grandfather, but the Adravendi would not be there for it. He couldn't take it. He just couldn't. With the death of his grandfather, it was too easy for him to picture it being Collision instead of Cairo. His father...he had to spend more time with his old man. Collision was beginning to climb up in age. He wasn't exactly at the point of turning senile, he was from that, but the years were beginning to catch up with his dad. He was no longer the alpha of Valhalla, so Gael was sure he had plenty of time on his paws for him to spend time with his children. And the young man would take advantage of that time, trying to spend as much as he could with his father, learning, talking, teaching, before the earth decided to claim his father as well.


The sound of the rain and thunder, mixed in with the cracks of lighting made it nearly impossible to hear anything except for that. Not that he was concerned with having to listen to anything at the moment. He didn't expect anyone to come looking for him; they had all been to busy with taking in Cairo's dead body. Nobody had noticed him slip away from the gathering. No one knew he was out here all alone in the middle of a storm, the wind howling its protest at the events of the night, buffeting his large frame yet bringing no reaction from the man. He was completely defenseless, choosing to ignore the world around him, leaving himself vulnerable to attack. But that didn't matter to him. If anyone came with the attempt to harm him, his grandfather wouldn't be the only one departing from the world that night.


And then there was someone standing in front of him, his muzzle brushing the other wolf's chest. It was so wet that was it was practically impossible for him to catch any kind of scent, and despite being so close to the second wolf, all he could smell was wet fur, no distinctive perfume that would tell him who it was. But he didn't need a scent, the voice said it all. Meili. Where had she come from? He didn't care. She was here, resting her head atop his shoulders, her presence acting like a soothing balm to him. He would've turned away to hide the continuous flow of tears that hadn't stopped since he'd come across his grandfather, but the rain was good enough camouflage that she would never see him cry. At least that's what he was hoping. Meili... he rumbled, his voice barely above a whisper as he curled his chin around her shoulders, pulling her close to him, holding her against him. He didn't know how she had found him or why she was here, but he was glad.


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Meili


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Athena I
07-02-2013, 08:58 PM



It broke her heart seeing the young, earth-hued man like this. At his pained whisper of her name, her ears laid flat against her skull and her eyes closed, letting him hold her close and was just simply there for him. There wasn't much else she could do for him. All she had to offer was her presence and she hoped that was enough. A deep sadness echoed in her. Knowing he was hurting in any way made Meili feel awful with worry. She didn't care if the rain poured on them and thunder crashed over head. She would stand her with him as long as it took.

After several moments of holding him and trying to comfort him the best she could, she asked him gently, "What happened? Gael, what's wrong?" She didn't pull away, she refused to let him go unless he wanted her to. Despite the situation, standing there in the middle of a storm with her obviously broken friend, she felt better holding him close. Knowing he was there where she could care for him gave her a little comfort. She could only hope that she could do the same for him.

"Speech."



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07-02-2013, 09:12 PM (This post was last modified: 07-03-2013, 12:03 AM by Gael.)


Meili couldn't see him like this. She couldn't see him so broken and distraught. Guilt riddled his frame as he considered how he was making her feel at the moment, seeing him in the state that he was. He wanted to hide from her, to go somewhere and fix himself up, lock away the emotions that were crashing through him like the thunder up above, to go back to the Gael that she had been with for the past few weeks. But he couldn't find the strength to do it...He couldn't leave her like this, in the middle of the storm, not knowing what was going on with him. It would hurt her, that much was sure. He wanted her to know that he trusted her, and what better way than allowing her to see him in his weakest moment, even if it went against his very nature.


She was soaking wet, he could feel it as he pressed her against him, the rain pelting them both of them now. In a brief moment of thoughtfulness Gael pulled, using his chin to tuck her crown beneath his, shielding her face from the rain yet still keeping her close. He wouldn't used himself a living shield to cover her from the rain, but he couldn't find the strength to get any of his limbs to move. He would have to move her out of the rain soon lest she become ill. He couldn't handle her becoming sick because of his own stubborn stupidity. Her gentle voice caressed his ears, asking him what was wrong. Lids fell closed over cerulean gems, chin tucking Meili's head a bit close to him. My grandfather died today...I didn't know him very well. I'm not sure if I ever actually spoke with him, but I do remember having met him once or twice as a child...I never got to say goodbye Mei...I got there too late... Silent tears continued to trickle down his earthen cheeks, mixing with the rain that was still falling around them.



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Meili


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Athena I
07-02-2013, 09:37 PM



The fea let Gael tuck her head under his to shield her face from the rain. She felt like she should be the one shielding and protecting him, but she knew that it was in his nature to protect his friends so she didn't complain. She simply sat and huddled close to him, her head tucked against his chest. She couldn't say she wasn't grateful to get a little bit of relief from the relentless rain.

He finally told her what was bothering him and if it was possible for her heart to sink any lower it did. She knew what it was like to lose something that was impossible to get back. She knew what it was like to have something so far out of her own control that there was literally nothing she could do about it. This was probably one of the first times the young wolf had experienced a loss like this. And what was worse, it had been a member of his family and she knew how much his family meant to him. She knew he must be absolutely crushed.

Meili gave his chest a comforting lick and told him, "I'm so sorry for your loss, Gael..." She pressed her head to his chest again and nuzzled him gently. There was nothing she could say that could fix everything. Nothing was going to bring his grandfather back. All she could do was stay here with him and try to comfort him the best she could.

"Speech."



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07-02-2013, 09:54 PM (This post was last modified: 07-03-2013, 12:00 AM by Gael.)


He had to distract himself, he had to push these feelings away. He didn't like them. Not at all. He didn't like feeling useless, feeling the weight of his guilt bare down on him. He didn't want to feel like this. He wanted to be like he always was with Mei. Carefree, happy, unconcerned, like someone of his age should be feeling. He didn't want to wake up tomorrow with these feelings, to know that what happened tonight was real. He wished it was a dream, just a horrible nightmare that he would be able to wake up from. That tomorrow he would wake up and Cairo would be still be alive and the young Adravendi would still be able to talk to his grandfather, still tell him how much he meant to him despite not being blood-related. But that was too much to ask.


Mei huddled closer to him as he tucked her beneath his chin, pressing her smaller frame against his chest. A shiver racked his frame, the coldness of the water starting to seep through his thick skin as he readjusted his stance, using his body as physical shield as he put himself in the direct path of the pelting rain, shielding the smaller woman from most of the water. It felt good to protect Meili, even if it was just from water. He needed that. He needed her. Whatever forces had brought her to him that night, he thanked them all vehemently. He didn't know what he would've done with himself if she hadn't found him. She was keeping him sane, keeping the emotions from strangling him, from taking over. She was his rock at the moment, his emotional rock, just like he was being her physical rock.


He could feel her tongue against his chest, surprisingly warm in comparison to the cold pelting rain as she nuzzled him, burying herself deeper into his chest. He tucked his head against her, pressing her as much as he could into himself, eyes still shut tightly. He wasn't even my real blood grandfather, but he was my grandfather nonetheless...Thank you for being here for me my little woman... Affection laced his words as he hugged Meili, his words unable to convey the gratitude that he felt towards her for being with him during such a difficult time.



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Meili


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Athena I
07-02-2013, 10:19 PM



A small smile touched her muzzle at her friend's words. Even in this awful time he still found a way to pull at her heartstrings and make her feel loved. It felt good to know that even when his world was crumbling around him, she could help him in some way. She might not be able to heal him completely, but if she could help him in the process she would do whatever it took. "I wouldn't want to be anywhere else..." she replied, her words completely sincere.

She couldn't hold back a soft shiver as the cold seeped through her wet fur to her skin. She knew if she was feeling the cold in Gael's protective embrace, he was probably freezing. He was already broken emotionally, she didn't want him sick on top of that. As much as she didn't want to she slipped out from under him, flinching slightly as the rain hit her face and thunder echoed around them again. "Lets find somewhere a little drier, okay?" she told him, hoping he might know of somewhere nearby that they could wait out the storm.

"Speech."



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07-02-2013, 10:48 PM (This post was last modified: 07-02-2013, 11:59 PM by Gael.)


Despite having his eyes closed against the pelting rain, he could feel Mei smiling against his chest, which cracked his own half smile. With each passing moment that he spent with her, he could feel the weight of his guilt being lifted, the emotions rolling through him slowly subsiding. She was the calm to his inner storm. He was coming back to himself slowly and it was all thanks to Meili. If she wasn't aware of his amazing she was, then he was going to make it his job to help her realize it. She too incredible not be aware of it. Her gentle voice was soothing to his ears, reassuring him that she wouldn't want to be anywhere but with him. His heart swelled at her words, returning from the pit of his stomach to drum against his chest. She was just amazing, beyond any words he could ever find to thank her.


Moments after his own shiver had racked his frame, he could feel a similar one run through Mei's own figure, transferring onto his. She was getting cold and so was he, the relentless water soaking the body heat straight out of them. She pulled away from her, exposing her pretty face to the rain as she suggested they find somewhere drier for the night. Stay close. I think there are some caves near by we can hole up in. He nuzzled her cheek, pressing his body to her side as he rallied her forward with him, still somewhat shielding her as he led her across to the other side of the lake where the mountain faced them, spotting a few lower caves that were possibly big enough to accommodate both himself and his friend. Picking up the pace, Gael led Meili to the closest cave, taking a quick sweep of it to clear it of any danger before motioning for her to step in, leaving himself outside in the rain until she was settled in.



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Meili


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Athena I
07-02-2013, 11:36 PM



Meili nodded in understanding when he told her to stay close, smiling again when he nuzzled her. She pressed against him happily and followed him around the edge of the lake, letting him block some of the rain from hitting her again. She wanted to feel bad about having him take the most of the storm, but she was too grateful. After Gael had led her to a small cave and made sure it was safe, she quickly slipped inside, sighing with relief, happy to finally be out of the rain. The small fea pressed herself up against the wall of the cave, giving her friend plenty of room to slip in beside her.

Once he was settled in out of the weather with her she cuddled up to him, more than happy to be with him and to have his warmth beside her. Meili nuzzled his shoulder and tucked her head against him, using his forelegs as a pillow. She immediately felt better with their shared warmth quickly dispelling any cold that was clinging to her body. Once they were settled in to wait out the storm that still raged outside, she asked gently, "Are you okay, Gael?" She was still concerned about his welfare. It wasn't like him to completely break down like that. She gave the leg right in front of her muzzle a tender lick, hoping that he was recovering at least.

"Speech."



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07-02-2013, 11:53 PM (This post was last modified: 07-02-2013, 11:56 PM by Gael.)


They made use of their legs as he led them towards the gave, giving the potential shelter a quick sweep, making sure there was nothing in there that could potentially harm his new friend before giving her the all the clear to head on inside. She didn't take another moment to think about it, ducking inside the cave quickly, Gael following her lead. It was instant relief to the young man as he moved inside of the cave, no longer under the attack of the pelting rain. He took a moment to shake himself, spraying water droplets all across the cave walls and floor, speeding up the drying process before he moved towards Mei, limbs folding beneath him as he dropped to the cave of the floor, allowing his spine to rest against the wall behind him, sighing with relief. He hadn't been so glad to be inside a cave in his life.


Meili wasted no time coming to side, folding her smaller frame against his own, nuzzling his shoulder as she rested her head across his forelegs, her tongue pressing a kiss to the leg closest to her, asking him if he was okay. A quiet sigh slipped past his earthen kissers, allowing his chin to drape across her nape. I guess...Things will probably be different back home now, but I'm going to live... He trailed off, allowing his eyes to close for the moment, forgetting about his grandfather's death, allowing Mei's soothing and comforting presence to envelop him, pushing all his worries and guilty feelings away.



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Meili


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Athena I
07-03-2013, 12:25 AM



Meili didn't press him any further when he said that he guessed he was okay. She could tell he didn't want to talk about it and she would respect that. If he did, she would be here for him like she always was. For now, she just wanted to focus on comforting him. She knew it was going to be a long time before he was really okay after such a trauma, but maybe she could help the process along.

Meili lifted her head just enough that she could tenderly groom the fur on his chest and neck. Her tongue ran through the soft fur, removing as much water from his coat as she could reach while straightening up his fur at the same time. Once she was done she rested her head on his legs again, smiling happily just from being with her best friend. If she was being honest with herself, he was not just her best friend, but her only friend. She cared deeply for her young man and wanted to take care of him when she could.

She felt deep in her heart that she loved this young brute and that feeling had grown so strong that she couldn't deny it any more. She knew he was a yearling, she knew their worlds were completely different, but she never wanted him to leave. She was terrified to tell him how she felt. She was afraid he wouldn't feel the same way and didn't want him to risk any of the relationships he had back in his pack or with his family in order to be with her if she did. Instead, she stayed silent, quietly hoping that one day they could really be together.

"Speech."



Gael


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07-03-2013, 12:35 AM


She said nothing after his confession, simply lying against his forelegs quietly, absorbing his words. He was glad that she didn't press the subject. He wasn't too keen on talking about it anymore. It was bad enough that it had happened; he didn't need to keep talking about it and bringing it up. For now at least. He knew keeping it bottled up inside of him wasn't the best thing, but for now that's where it would stay. Later on, maybe tomorrow, maybe weeks from now, maybe even months or even years, he would let it all out. But for now, he preferred to keep it bottled inside. He didn't want to talk to Meili about his deceased grandfather anymore. He didn't want to be sad around her. She was such a happy person that he hated being like this around, bringing her down. It just didn't feel right to have her feeling like this. It was unnatural and Gael didn't like it.


He could feel her lifting her up and so the brute released his hold on her, lifting his own crown, wondering why she was lifting her head when her tongue lashed across his lower neck and chest. Goosebumps rippled across the yearling's skin at her touch, lids falling closed over cerulean gems as he enjoyed the grooming from his friend, a content rumble vibrating in his massive chest, a smile curling his kissers. Her tongue disappeared several moments later, her crown returning to its former position across his forelimbs. Lids peeled back as he lowered his head, salmon tongue lashing out against the crown of her head, taking long, sweeping strokes up her ears as he returned the favor, trying to take away as much moisture from her fur as possible in an attempt to speed up the drying process. Once he was satisfied Gael allowed his chin to rest atop her nape once again, a content sigh slipping past his closed lips. It felt just to enjoy his new friend's presence, even in stormy weather like this.


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Meili


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Athena I
07-03-2013, 09:54 AM



Meili was resting contentedly, happy to have given her friend a little comfort, when she suddenly felt his tongue running over her head and backs of her ears. She let her eyes slide closed and gave a low, happy murr in her chest as her skin tingled under his touch. The corners of her lips curled into a smile and she just enjoyed him returning the favor.

The feeling of his tongue pulling pleasantly at her fur seemed to rattle something deep in her brain. It felt like some distant, broken thing in her memory was trying to shake loose. She frowned and tried to figure out what it was, trying to dissect that small section of her memory. It felt like it was just out of her grasp, just on the edge of her consciousness. She focused hard on it, but couldn't quite figure out how to see this loosened memory. Instead, just like with every time she tried to reach back into her broken head, she was stopped by the wall that was the bloody scene she woke up to, the day her current memory began. She quickly pulled herself back to the present, letting his touch push away the fear that crept up on her.

When he was apparently satisfied with the job he had done grooming her and settled himself on the nape of her neck again, she sighed and closed her eyes, pushing away the troubled thoughts. She didn't say anything about her jumbled memories. She didn't want to trouble Gael with anything more than what he was going through right now. Besides, why would she dwell on the past when she had Gael in her future?

"Speech."



Gael


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07-03-2013, 01:37 PM


An amusing thought crossed his mind as he groomed Meili. The act of grooming her reminded him of the days when he was a pup, always getting dirty and such, and having to always take a bath before he was allowed in the den. And after each bath, his mother would dry them all of with her tongue, in a similar fashion as to what he was doing with Meili. The memory made him feel older than her for a few spare moments, like if he was really the one that could protect her. And of course he was. He was physically bigger than her, therefore he was her self-appointed guardian. He would be there to protect her if she ever needed it; she was family after all.


And yet, as he was grooming her, he could feel a sudden change in her mood, something stirring up. He continued on with his grooming until he was satisfied, giving her head a quick inspection to make sure he had done a good job before resting against her again. But he couldn't shake the feeling that something was up with her. It wasn't obvious, nothing flashed across her fa?ade, there was no physical sign that would've alerted him that anything was wrong, but he had spent a year away from his family, out with the world, observing and learning. He had taught himself to recognize the shift of feelings with someone, the subliminal change in mood that would alert him that something was wrong. And he could feel that now with Meili. Just what was troubling his new friend? Surely it couldn't have been what he had told her about his deceased grandfather that was troubling her so?


Unable to stand her feeling like this, Gael lifted his head, onyx nose pressing into the crook of her ear, salmon tongue brushing against the fur there. Mei what's wrong? I can tell something is the matter...If you don't want to talk about it just say so and I won't bring it up again... He was gentle in his approach, not wanting to make it seem like he was prying, but the young Adravendi was genuinely concerned about his friend. He didn't like when she wasn't happy.


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Meili


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Athena I
07-03-2013, 02:27 PM



Meili decided that her new friend was psychic. She hadn't said a word about anything bothering her, had purposely tried to avoid showing outward signs of distress to keep him from worrying about her, but somehow he had guessed that something was bothering her. Just as she was settling down and relaxing again, she felt Gael move again and felt his nose and tongue on her ear. She smiled at his touch, but that smile quickly faded away at his question. How had he guessed? Her man was constantly surprising her with how intune to people he was. Maybe he just knew her especially well. They had instantly clicked when they met and she felt like she knew him better than she ever had another wolf so that might explain how he could've guessed something was up.

Meili gave a little sigh and shook her head as she lifted it from its resting place on his legs. "No, it's fine. I always want to be open with you. I was just trying not to bother you with it since I was more worried about you... It's just that when you were grooming me just then..." She hesitated, her ears folding back. "When you were grooming me it felt like something was... loosened in my brain. All of old memories are locked away, you see. It like everything from that day I woke up and back is locked away and I've never been able to get to it. But when you were grooming me it felt like it shook something loose, but when I tried to focus on it..." she looked down at the ground between her forelegs, a soft, frustrated whine echoing in her chest. "Everytime I try to think about back then, I just get this image from that day and I just can't..."

With her ears pinned back and her paws tucked underneath her, she stared down at the ground, refusing to look at him. She was so beyond broken. Her memories were a jumbled mess that she didn't think could ever be fixed. Back when she first lost her memory, it was cut in half, black and white. There were her old memories and her new memories, they weren't a rocky mess like they were now. She rested her head back in her spot on his legs, but still refused to look up at his lovely cerulean gaze. She felt awful for dragging him into her messed up life. He was so young and had so much going for him, but she was just a broken loner. She didn't know what he saw in her that made him want to stay with her and be her friend. She wished she could be whole again for him, so she could live a normal life with him. She was afraid that would never happen. This wasn't the first time she had felt one of her old memories show up just out of her reach, but it had been one of the most obvious, jarring times. She felt like everything was out of balance and she wasn't sure where all the puzzle pieces of her mind were supposed to land.

"Speech."



Gael


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07-04-2013, 12:50 AM (This post was last modified: 07-04-2013, 12:50 AM by Gael.)


No, it's fine. I always want to be open with you. I was just trying not to bother you with it since I was more worried about you... It's just that when you were grooming me just then...When you were grooming me it felt like something was... loosened in my brain. All of old memories are locked away, you see. It like everything from that day I woke up and back is locked away and I've never been able to get to it. But when you were grooming me it felt like it shook something loose, but when I tried to focus on it...Everytime I try to think about back then, I just get this image from that day and I just can't... So it wasn't about him. At least that was somewhat of a relief. But now Gael knew the source of her worry; her memory. His simple action had nearly stirred back her memory, but she couldn't quite grasp it. The young man felt useless, unable to help her. How could he bring back her memories? That was impossible. He didn't even know what they were to begin with, and neither did she since she'd practically lost them. He couldn't even begin to think of ways to bring them back, he'd never met someone who had lost their memory. The guilt returned, but this time, it wasn't because of his grandfather.


The smaller woman avoided her beautiful teal gaze, dipping her skull towards her paws, refusing to look at him. Why did she deny him the opportunity to gaze into her marvelous eyes? Was she that bothered by the fact that she couldn't recall what her life used to have been? He didn't care if she'd lost her memory, or if she didn't ever recover her memory. Those past memories didn't define her anymore. Whatever Meili she'd been back then she obviously wasn't the same woman anymore. She was this Meili, his new friend; that's the Mei she was. Mei look at me please...Don't look away...Not being able to retain your memories is nothing to be ashamed of...It's not your fault. I don't care that you don't remember, that doesn't matter to me. You're Mei, my new friend, a beautiful fun-loving, amazing woman whom I care for a lot despite barely having met you. That's who you are. That's what matters. The silver brute nuzzle the smaller woman, licking her cheek in a soft kiss, audits flattening against his skull. She wasn't supposed to be sad. She was supposed to be happy. Mei was meant to be happy. Always.


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Loner

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Vail
07-04-2013, 12:15 PM



With every word that passed her friend's lips the resolute hatred that she had for herself began to break down. He was chipping away at her with every kind word he said. When he looked at her, he saw all of the good in her that she had never tried to see. All she saw when she looked at herself was a wolf with a scattered consciousness and no real plans for her future and no home. He saw so many things about her personality that she hadn't even considered about herself. The stress melted off of her shoulders as he spoke and her expression softened into nothing short of tender awe. He was so sweet and kind to her. She didn't know what she would do without him. His nuzzle and kiss was the final straw she needed to pull herself out of the depression she had spiraled into.

She finally lifted her gaze from the floor of the small cave to look into his cerulean eyes, tears sparkling in the corners of her eyes. Her voice was nothing more than a pained whisper when she spoke. "I'm just scared, Gael. My mind didn't used to be so... so scattered. It used to be cut in half, my old memories and my new memories. But now it feels like it's all getting more and more blurred, more and more broken... What is it going to be like a year or two from now? What if... what if I go insane?" She choked out the last few words as the tears that had pooled in the corners of her teal eyes rolled down her cheeks. She was genuinely afraid for herself now. She pressed her face into the soft fur on his neck, needing to feel the comfort that his touch brought and not wanting her friend that she cared so deeply for to see her cry any more.

"Speech."



Gael


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07-04-2013, 04:15 PM


He helped others. That had become his mission in life, ever since he'd wandered off. He loved helping others. Loved being able to solve their problems, to help them resolve something that they probably wouldn't have been able to resolve without his help. And that's what he was trying to do with Mei at the moment. She needed help and he was here, trying to provide his assistance as much as he could, though he feared for once his help wasn't sufficient enough. He could help her move on, that was not a problem for the young man at all, but as far as trying to get to come to terms with the fact that she might not ever be able to retain her memories, he wasn't too sure about that. But just because he wasn't sure about how to approach the situation didn't mean that he was going to give up on her already. Not a chance. He would stick with it, coming at the situation from every angle until he found a way to work through it. He swore to her that he would help her no matter what he wasn't about to break a promise.


His words seemed to have done the trick, Mei's beautiful teal eyes raising to meet his cerulean ones, tears pricking the corners of her eyes. Audits flattened against his skull, an uneasy whine slipping past his clamped jaws. No, Meili couldn't cry. I'm just scared, Gael. My mind didn't used to be so... so scattered. It used to be cut in half, my old memories and my new memories. But now it feels like it's all getting more and more blurred, more and more broken... What is it going to be like a year or two from now? What if... what if I go insane? The tears that had been pricking at her eyes spilled over, rushing down her cheeks as she buried her face into his neck, the moisture soaking into his skin. But you don't have to be scared Mei. You don't have to be scared because I'm here. I'm here for you, to help you through it, with whatever you need, and however you need help. I'm not going anywhere anytime soon. You can count on that. Gael tucked his chin against the smaller woman's crown, pressing her against him, wishing that he could take away her worries.


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Meili


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Athena I
07-04-2013, 04:52 PM



There was nothing quite as comforting as the feeling of Gael holding her close. She let herself relax against him, just pushing away her worries for a moment to enjoy having this wolf with her. He was so much stronger than she could have ever imagined for someone his age. Not only in the physical sense, but the emotional sense as well. How could a yearling care so deeply and apparently endlessly for her, someone he hadn't known long at all? Slowly her tears dried as she finally calmed down and was able to think rationally for a moment. Yes, her brain was a mess, yes, she had no clue how stable she might be in the future, but she had Gael so things weren't all bad.

Sighing softly, she finally pulled back from his neck to look into that lovely gaze of his again and gave him a gentle smile before giving his nose a soft kiss. "I'm sorry for breaking down like that. It's very unlike me... Sometimes it's just overwhelming, thinking about the future and things I can't control like that. She nuzzled his neck and gave his cheek a gentle kiss as well, resting her head on his shoulder happily. She knew her problems were not solved in the slightest, but at least now she was calm about it. As long as she had Gael to put things in perspective for her she thought she thought she could at least keep herself together. For Gael she would do anything and he could be her motivation to get better, or at least not get any worse. "I care for you a lot too, you know..." she said softly, thinking back to what he had said before, her heart pattering in her chest and a smile crossing her muzzle.

"Speech."