This was the last conversation Basilisk wanted to have, but it was the one he was least able to put off. He was spending a lot of time with Ignita. If he left it, he was just opening the door for Spider to find out themselves, and Basilisk had a feeling that would be the worst way for this to go down. He was not, and could not replace Hazel, and he most definitely wasn’t putting another parent in her place. How much and what acceptance Spider might eventually give Ignita would be up to them. But in the meanwhile, as his kid, Spider would always have a claim over part of his heart. And their opinion of who Basilisk was with mattered. Because there was no separation of adoption. Basilisk was all in, and Spider was his kid.

He reached the Col, and raised his head to call for Spider, taking a seat on the sun-warmed earth on the unusually warm winter day.


"Basilisk Fatalis"

another summons, and this time Spider has been half expecting it. they’ve got that feeling again, the ominous one that hangs in the air and burrows under their skin, the one that makes them want to tear their pelt off. their face is blank as they answer Bas’ call, already guarding their heart against this nezt piece of news. what new ways will the world find to break their heart? they don’t want to know, what to close their eyes to this and bury their head in the sand. but they don’t. instead, when they meet Bas in the Col, they just lift a sardonic brow. “who’s leaving this time?” a joke in poor taste, but everything feels in poor taste these days.

"Speech"

He wasn't left waiting long before the little form of his kid appeared. Trotting through the Col, the sunlight highlighting the faint stripes across their coat. When the younger wolf reached him, it was Spider who spoke first. He paused, thrown off his stride by Spider's unexpected bitterness. He called on the wolf for plenty of reasons. To hunt, to eat, to check in.


The last time they had spoken, they had been cordial with eachother. Had something changed? “Hey, Kiddo. Are you okay?” He asked softly. Shoving everything else to the side yo deal with later as he reached out a paw, offering Spider a hug but doing nothing to enforce it.

Spider goes willingly, guilt twisting their stomach as they lay their head on Bas’ shoulder. they’re not being fair, and the last thing they want to do is take their bad mood out on him - not when he’s suffering, too. “i’m sorry,” they sigh, eyes squeezing shut for a moment. it’s nice to have Bas with them, to ground themselves in their father’s presence. his absence in their quarters has been niggling at them, only furthering their crankiness. is he pulling away, growing distant? “i haven’t been sleeping well.”they withdraw a fraction to meet his eyes. “what’s up?”

Spider came willingly into his embrace, and he wrapped his paws around the smaller wolf and kissed the top of their head. “Me either.” He admitted quietly “I haven't been able to stay in the space I shared with her.” There was a crater sized hole of his missing best friend in that den, and fool that he was he hadn't been able to force himself to stay there. Not when he could still feel her presence there.

He shook his head, trying not to get distracted and squeezed Spider again before releasing them. Pulling back slightly to give them room. “Because you are my kid, and you will always be my kid with a claim as strong as blood, what I have to say affects you, as well as me.” He explained. He let out a soft breath. No way around it, he just had to say it, and do what he could to ease the blow. “I've chosen Ignita to be my mate.”

Spider tenses as Bas pulls away, bracing themselves for his news, but their chest loosens as he emphasises their own importance. it warms them to hear that their opinion matters so much to him, that no matter what happens, he’ll always see them as his kid. and then his next words register, and their mind empties so completely that only a low, buzzing static remains. Spider blinks once, twice, staring at Bas in uncomprehending silence.

a sudden laugh wrenches out of them, short and brittle and near-hysterical. a shocked, ugly little choked-off sound. “w-what?” Ignita? as in…Ig? their friend, Ig, who taught them blacksmithing and comforted them over Hazel’s departure at the festival? “your slave?” they’re having a nightmare, it’s the only explanation. they can’t even…what is - how - “i…don’t understand.” they’ve misheard him, somehow. it’s the only explanation.

"Speech"

He watched Spider's expression blanken, and surprised flicked across his own at the harsh laugh that left the little wolf. The news clearly taking him blind. He'd announced Ignitas freedom a few days ago, but he could forgive Spider for forgetting it as the shock washes over them. 

He gave them a moment, and then spoke again, keeping his voice soft. “I can not and am not replacing who Hazel was to you. Any and what level of involvement she has in your life will be up to you, and no one else. I know this is a shock, and we're probably on completely different pages right now. I lost my best friend, and you lost the woman who brought you in.” He should probably stop there, he needed to stop there. But the words kept spilling out of him. 

He wasn't good with emotion, and the look on Spider's face was doing something awful to his insides. “As best friends, me and Hazel made an incredible team. We understood each other. As mates… I'd been feeling her drift away for a long time now. We might have loved each other, but I don't think either of us were truly happy.” At some point, she'd turned into a stranger to him.

Bas is talking, but only about half the words register, washing over them as they fight to keep some semblance of composure. “i hear what you’re saying, but…the timeline…” isn’t it too soon? but that’s not really their decision to make, is it? still, now that Spider thinks back on it, certain pieces begin to slot together. the glances Ignita and Bas seemed to exchange, sometimes, when they thought no one was looking. Ignita’s words to them at the festival. “forgive me if i do?” something cold is working it’s way through their veins, freezing their blood and hollowing out their insides, leaving only a cold fury in its wake. Ignita had listened to them mourn Hazel…and, what? was fucking Bas on the side? Spider thinks of that small white and ginger wolf, with her goggles and her enthusiasm and her bright, inquisitive eyes, and feels a surge of anger so strong it almost knocks them off their feet. betrayal.

it doesn’t show on their face, though - their expression has gone cold. unreadably cold. “did you two…” they can’t even say it, the revulsion is too strong. Spider swallows a mouthful of bile, tries again. “did you and Ignita…while you and Hazel were still…”

"Speech"

Yeah, the timeline sucked. Basilisk had done his best to wrestle with time and he had never, ever cheated on Hazel. Not physically. But the emotional investment he had felt with Ignita while he was with Hazel had definitely burned through him. It was what had caused him to make that push, to reach out to Hazel…. To break that bond, that friendship. When Spider voiced their question, he wordlessly shakes his head, his own throat locking up. Seeing what Spider was afraid of. “No. I did not cheat on Hazel” he said after a soft breath, speaking the truth.

“Ignita and I were never intimate while I was with Hazel. But I'll admit, the feelings I had pushed me to make a change with Hazel. To try and bring us back to… to what we had been. Salvage what was breaking… except I made a right mess of it, didn’t I?” He swallowed past the lump in his throat. What hurt was… he would have liked Hazel’s guidance. His best friend, who knew how to drink in the firelight of the night and drown out his worries with laughter. “Quite frankly, the timeline sucks. It’s all too close together, and I hate that.” He thunked his rump against the ground, looking… a little lost. “Honestly. I have no idea how to navigate any of this, Spider. Matters of the heart are… messy, complicated, even before you add a kid to the mix. Catching you up in the mess of all this… I never wanted that.”

"Basilisk Fatalis"

he’d had feelings for when he was Hazel. they hadn’t acted upon it - thank the stars - but the emotions between them had been a form of infidelity, hadn’t it? Spider looks at Bas’ sad face and feels an answering throb in their chest, but it’s buried beneath a layer of chill. in this matter, it’s clear that Bas is confused and fumbling, wading through a situation he hadn’t foreseen. a situation that should never have come about, a less generous part of them sneers. Spider’s first instinct is to push it away, quash it down - but they’re sick of doing that. sick of suppressing every negative thought and feeling at the risk of hurting someone else. maybe it’s selfish, but right now the only hurt they want to think about is their own. they keep waiting for the tears - their chest is hurting and their throat is tightening the way it does when they’re about to cry - but maybe they’ve used them all up. maybe they’ve cried every last allotted tear, and all they have now is a throbbing emptiness and a cold frozen spot in the pit of their stomach. they keep thinking of Ignita’s face at the festival, of ‘forgive if i do?’ playing on repeat, a little more distorted every time, until it doesn’t even sound like her voice any more but a mocking pantomime. she’d know how deeply this would hurt them, and she’d done it anyway.

“i wish she’d never come here.”

they’re not sure if they mean to say it, but it rings true through the air between them. they’d never raise a paw against someone Bas has claimed for himself, but they can’t deny that they want Ignita gone. they watch Bas’ face, wondering if he’ll chastise them, if he’ll yell and rage and defend his new mate. he’s never gotten angry at them, but have they pushed too far?

"Speech"

Shit. He'd rather they be mad at him than Ignita. But it was as if he'd used up his quota of words. The flood had damned up, and he didn't know what to say. He'd never been very good at the emotional side of things, but he loved his kid. This whole damn mess had tangled them up. That was his fault, and he wasn't going to punish Spider for feeling. 

He didn't try to reach out for Spider, not knowing what he'd do if they rejected him. He sat there for a moment in silence. “Take your time to adjust to this. You're the first to know. If you need anything, I'm here.” He said at last.

Bas’ lack of anger is bittersweet, a relief and an irritation. a part of them had been geared up for a fight, ready to scream their throat raw until the anger thumping against their skull has dulled to manageable levels. but they don’t want Bas mad at them, not truly; they don’t think they can handle it. “alright.”

their voice is quiet, neutral, disguising the maelstrom of fury and betrayal raging in their veins. it feels like nothing will ever be alright again. but what can they do? they don’t want to leave the Armada, it’d be like tearing their own heart out through their ribcage. and they can’t ask Bas to give up his new mate - especially when they’re not sure who he’d choose. despite all his assurances, they can’t quite ignore the fear whispering through them, the fear that Bas is discarding the old and building himself a new family from the ground up. a better family. “but i…i might never be okay with this. Ignita kept this from me for so long.” it’s a rather mild way of describing the vehemence of their anger, the proverbial vein pulsing at their temple. “i don’t know if i can forgive her for that.”

"Speech"

Ah. Basilisk straightened, closing off the vulnerabilities he had allowed Spider to see. Since becoming Alpha, and part of his family had turned on him, the wolves he allowed to see weakness had narrowed down to three. But first and foremost he was Alpha, and his expression as he looked at Spider was a touch stern.

“Ignita has been in a position of vulnerability. It's for that reason I freed her before making my choice. My position of power over her was a gross imbalance, secrets she has kept have been at the will of the alpha with direct power over her. If you're upset that this has been kept from you, direct that upset where it belongs. At me. I will give you all the time in the world to come to terms with this, and I won't judge you if you never do.” He paused, and gently tapped the new scar that ran close to his eye. “If you wish to air your grievances, do it now Spider. Add your mark next to that of your mother's.”

Spider stares, uncomprehending, scarcely able to think over the blood roaring through their ears. Bas’ scar stands out stark against his dark face, a parting gift from the woman he’d spent so much of his life with. “n-no, i…i don’t want…” how could he think this of them? that they’d want to inflict the same kind of pain? that it’d comfort them to tear his face open? Spider squeezes their eyes shut, wishing they could will the world away. their chest hurts so much, and nausea roils in their stomach. they really might be sick this time. “how can you even a-ask me that?” Spider chokes out. their legs sway, and they lean forward to rest their forehead against Bas’ chest, shuddering through the sobs. still no tears. not a drop. “d-don’t you know that’d be like hurting m-myself?” he’s their dad, the person they love most in the world; his pain is theirs.

"Speech"

With Spider's words, Basilisk realised that somewhere along the line- with Kite and half her siblings betrayal, with Hazel's eye for an eye attitude… yes. He had come to expect, even from those he loved most, and showed vulnerability to. Betrayal, hurt, abandonment. When he had become such a mess inside? Spider leaned forward, their little body swaying. Basilisk scooped them up, and cradled them against his chest. He rested his head against the back of Spider's. His eyes were leaking, moisture rolling free and pattering against the small wolf's fur. “So that's what true loyalty feels like.” He said, his voice as watery as his eyes. Why did it feel like a double edged sword? Amazing, and painful all at once.

“I'm not sure I deserve it. But I love you too, Spider. Always and forever.” Instead of fighting him, Spider was accepting him. Sticking with him, despite the pain. Basilisk heart throbbed and ached and he wasn't sure how to deal with all the emotions rolling through him

Spider buries their head in Bas’ chest, surprised to feel the wetness of his tears soaking into their fear. have they ever seen Bas really, truly cry? it feels precious, like he’s entrusting a piece of himself to them. for a moment, the world shrinks down to just the two of them, beginning and ending in the warmth and love between. Spider doesn’t know how to entangle this clusterfuck - their heart still feels it’s been crushed into granules - but they can’t leave Bas, and they can’t leave their life in the Armada.

it would destroy them.

so for better or worse, Igni- she will have to stay. “i don’t know what to do, either,” they sniffle, a repetition of Bas’ earlier sentiment. they’re both stumbling blind, clawing for a foothold. “but i’m on your side, Dad. we’re a team, okay? you and me.” they’d told him as such, over and over when he’d taken up the mantle of Warlord, but maybe he hadn’t truly believed it until now. maybe he hadn’t thought himself worthy of such a promise.

He hugged Spider to him, wrestling back control over himself. The fear of losing Spider as he had Hazel had been hanging over him. It shocked him to realise just how far the bond between them went, and he swore to do his best to never hurt them again.

After a moment, he pulled away and kissed the top of their head. “You and me” he echoed softly. “Well navigate this together. I love you, Spider.” He said, leaning back and looking at the little wolf. This hadn’t gone anyway he expected, except for the hurt he had dealt Spider. He had tried to give the news as gently as he could, but no matter how he looked at it, it was too soon after Hazel’s leaving.


"Basilisk Fatalis"

Spider nods as Bas pulls away, scrubbing at their eyes. they can feel a resolution forming, a decision solidifying in their chest. Bas deserves to be happy, to have the sense of family his own father denied him - and as much as they loathe the whole thing, they won’t stand in the way of the life he’s building with Ignita. they’ll just have to bite their tongue and avoid her, that’s all there is to it. “i love you too, Dad,” Spider whispers, bumping his shoulder with theirs. for Bas, they can swallow the pain and the anger.

Basilisk had Spider on his side, and that knowledge fueled him. It changed something inside of him when he saw the full extent of his kids' loyalty. He sighed softly, all the emotions were difficult to navigate. But he’d try to do better, for Spider. “I’m not comfortable sleeping in my den at the moment, so I’m not just down the hall anymore. But we should do something, at the same time every day. Breakfast or dinner, whatever's easier for you. Something to catch up over.” He suggested, looking to the younger wolf to see what they would think of the idea. They were almost a year old now. Winter wasn’t far away, and it wasn’t going to be an easy one to navigate without Hazel.

"Basilisk Fatalis"

Spider nods in understanding. they might not be thrilled about this union, but they can at least understand Bas’ hang ups about his current den. “i can respect that.” and at least they won’t…hear things. gag. “and i’d really like that, Dad. maybe dinner? we can catch each other up on our days.” it’d be nice to check in each evening, to listen to any concerns he might have about the pack and divulge their own. in the chaos of pack life, it’d be a nice touchstone. and pack life has certainly been extra chaotic, recently. “i think it’s a really nice idea.”