The forest was so dark, everything felt so dark, his heart racing and pounding in his chest as his body refused to calm down, caught in the throws of the nightmare still to some degree. Nails digging furrows into the ground and sides heaving as he almost panted for breath with tears spilling down his cheeks. Everything caught on Where was he, was he bringing more ‘friends’ this time, what was going to happen, did he wake him up, where was h- It was the crack and creaking of branches and undergrowth that had his panic skyrocketing, body curling in on himself as much as he physically could as his voice caught in his throat on the near wailing."Im sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to, please dont." Sobs wracking up painfully, his chest almost felt hollow from his wailing.

There almost wasn't any awareness of the hip touching his, much smaller than his own, the side of the owner’s against him. There was a distant voice too but he couldn’t register what it was saying, only the deep timbre of it. It was the head slowly laying on his own that had his body shaking and hiccups working their way between his crying, turning his whole head into Lailah’s chest and neck as he tried to get himself under control. The fog doing its best to clear with the familiar scent.

"Are you all right? Dream?" Ultyr, that voice was Ultyr, and he knew that but the terror and fear in his system made that thought a lot scarier than his waking mind had ever made the other out to be. His body pressed harder into Lailah’s as he worked to swallow and get his voice back even if he couldn't use it properly yet. Not to answer yet. But his sobbing had slowed to little gasps and hiccups, pale and red-rimmed eye rolling to look at Ultyr to try and ground himself more in this reality before he managed to croak out a quiet, "Memory.". That was no dream, and gods above he wished it was just a nightmare, but no. It was real, even if it was the past.

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coded by NachoMumma

"Im sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to, please dont." His pleas had fallen on deaf ears. She had heard his scream, it hadn't been pain, but fear. She knew fear, and wasn't about t let someone be afraid alone. It was always better to have another to be frightened with.

"Where? Who did it? What's going on?" His growl had her already on edge nerves reeling. He was angry. She didn't understand what she had done wrong. A flinch away from him, her whole body leaned away. Her hackles raised even more if that was even possible. Her half tail kissing her belly barely. Fear of him in her eyes for his temper. Then she was moving carefully.

Once she had herself settled and Ganymede's head under her own, she was doing her best to give him her silent support. Ultyr was quiet as she did. Though the silence was filled with the sound of Ganymede as he cried into her chest. She wasn't really much of one to be able to comfort another but she did her best. Her head stayed atop the other's as he needed.

As he cried she rested her cheek on his, looking away from Ultyr. Her own form was still shaking and she wasn't sure she hadn't pissed him off by from the smells of it, pissing on him. Her own dreams had been vivid and she knew why she had pissed, Aryn terrified her. Everything about him and that night did. It was moments before the silence of the night, well aside from the sounds of Ganymede crying, was broken. Ultyr's voice finally calmed some but she still didn't look. "Are you all right? Dream?" She didn't dare look. In the dark he looked so much like Aryn that she wasn't sure the asshole wasn't here and had replaced Ultyr. At least he didn't seem ready to beat the shit out of her right now though.

Her ears pressed and she closed her eyes trying hard to shut her brain off. Her own heart was a harsh sound in her chest she was sure Ganymede could hear, her sides heaving slightly. She didn't dare cry. Crying over that night changed nothing and had only ever brought her more pain. She couldn't remember names or faces of those from that night, her own family blurs in her memory, but she could remember the screams. She dreamed about them so often. "Memory." The word from Ganymede had her opening her eyes and lifting her head to look down with the question in her eyes. Did he dream of that night too? Did he remember the screams? The smell of bodies as they burned?

Her face turned sad and her hackles lowered. Her forehead aiming to press to Ganymede's briefly before she let her own breath out and the tears finally broke. Hers silent. His loud. She was unaware it wasn't that night he dreamed of but she knew the catalyst of all the nightmares was that night. Then she was scootching till there was no space between herself and Ganymede and trying to hold the larger with her smaller frame, head on his neck. Her teary eye turned to Ultyr, a pain he could never heal in them but it was hers. But there was also a love there, an I forgave him a long time ago kind of look. She let the tears go, crying with Ganymede over a memory no one could alter, no one could fix.

"Hear"

coded by NachoMumma

Fuck.
The hackles along his spine began to relax as his mind became clearer. The silence in the darkness had stretched on as he waited for Gany's response. The tears, and the smells all threatened to overwhelm him.

A cold breeze cut into his wet side and wafted the smell more into his nose. Tilting his head to it he finally noticed it and pinned his ears. The terror of the night had made Lailah wet herself with her small squished bladder and he had been right next to her. He glanced around again, making sure they were safe before he turned and slowly walked away after he heard the murmur of Gany admitting to memories. He knew which memories. They shared opposite memories.

He didn't have to walk far to find a small bubbling stream. He laid down and dipped his piss-wet side in it. It wasn't the first time he'd been peed on in the middle of the night, legs wrapped around a lover suffering from nightmares.

As he let the cold stream carry away the acrid smell he looked up into the sky. The night was speckled with bright stars between the shadowed branches of freshly bare trees. He tried to remember that night. Storming the birthday party of the Morningstar royalty. It wasn't the first kingdom he had conquered with his father, but it was one of the most horrifying. He remembered the smell had made him wretch at first until his father scolded him for it. He remembered saving a younger boy, younger than Ganymede had probably been, from his father's services the next morning. Made the boy his personal kitchen boy where no one would dare touch him. He couldn't keep them all in his service. He was lucky his father had let him have that one boy.

He could almost remember that fateful day. But the memories were mixed with another kingdom. Toppling statues, setting the crops to light, the screams of the poor little godless heathens... Why didn't they understand? Why didn't they just say he was their god and they'd be left alone? Would they have been left alone?

He looked back down and watched the starlight play in the water over his paws. He didn't feel like a god washing the piss away. When he was retching when the smell of burnt flesh, piss, and feces assaulted his nose when the victory was so close at hand. Why would the actions of a benevolent god cause such nightmares? It wasn't him. It was his father. His father was the one driving the armies. He knew nothing else until his angel quietly told him what had actually happened.

With a sigh, he rose and shook the water from his pelt. The fresh stream had done its work. He watched the water one more time, remembering the delegate ball, several kingdoms had come to pay homage and pledge their loyalty to Ultyr and his father. To Archnemes. How he had paraded his lover before them all, a Prince of Judila, his personal slave. Then watched with satisfaction as each delegate, king, and princess had their throats slit at the feast by their servers. His Angel had not spoken to him for a week after that. Neither had Mama Rosa.

Slowly he returned to the two, perhaps they had some time to speak or just soothe each other's company. He pushed aside the foliage purposefully, dragging his paws through the leaf litter noisily. Letting them both know that he was returning.

"It's Ultyr." He rumbled, a touch of mourning in his tone. Yes, the image of their abuser, conqueror, demon walking toward them. Ultyr was much taller than his father. More robust, and his eyes were of active embers, unlike his father.

"Ganymede..." He spoke, his voice a rumble but soft, a breath above a whisper, "I will not harm you. I promised that you may walk away at any time. I am not my father. You may ask Lailah if I have ever hurt her." Shit... he did once, he regretted that... But gods do not regret their actions... He had been scared... Gods are not supposed to fear... His eyes betrayed his thoughts for once, uncertainty, glassy eyed and misty... Gods are not supposed to cry... He turned away from them, unable to hold back his own sniffing.

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coded by NachoMumma

He refused to move away from Lailah, refused to pick his head up from where he had it plastered to her chest despite her smaller size, soaking up the comfort to fend off the awful things that lurked in the dark of his brain. It was the feeling of her forehead bumping his own that had his sobs picking up again for a moment, he hated that none of them had been protected, that they had been hurt so badly that not even sleep was safe. The soft drip of her tears joined his own on his face and he pressed himself closer to give her some comfort too, working himself up to softly humming an old lullaby he used to have sung to him after he woke up from nightmares. It was all he had to give.

It was the sound of Ultyr moving off that had him looking up a small bit, trying to pinpoint in the dark where the other had gone. After a moment, he had to give up, the dark coat having vanished into the shadows like he was made from the woods there. There was no comfort in the other leaving if he was honest, just the vague feeling that something was now missing and that they were alone. Closing his eyes again, he sniffled into the pale chest his face rested against. It was hard to keep his mind from wandering as he calmed down, anxieties chewing at his ribs and threatening to overwhelm him. Just behind that anxiety was self-hate, hatred for being weak after everything that had happened, hatred for not being enough to help his family, hate for every moment he let that monster touch him.

The crunch of leaf litter felt deliberate and purposeful, a way to announce one’s approach, and it let him know that it was Ultyr who had come back before the other had ever said anything aloud. His body kept still against Lailah’s as he offered her comfort for everything she had dealt with the best he could. It is the start of words that have red-rimmed eyes looking up at Ultyr from where he lay.

"I will not harm you. I promised that you may walk away at any time. I am not my father. You may ask Lailah if I have ever hurt her." It took a moment to process the look of grief that colored the ember eyes of Ultyr, from a funeral pyre to a doused campfire. Did he feel bad? Was it pity or just worry about broken toys? It is the sniffle as the large man looked away that told him exactly what that look had been. "Ultyr….just come lay down, please. We need you, need to feel that you’re like us for a little bit. That you’re not an untouchable thing, just for a little while…" Ganymede can’t help the pain that still lingers in his voice, exhausted but not wanting the other to sit alone with his fears and pains no matter who he was or what he had done before. "If not for me then for Lailah, she feels scared." There wasn't a lie there, he could hear her heart pounding against his head where it lay.

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coded by NachoMumma

The sound of the lullaby hummed and she couldn't bring herself to stop the other. To make it known she kind of saw it as rude to hum or sing to her now, that she hated music now. Music had been something she once enjoyed but she couldn't enjoy it now. The sound wouldn't last she knew.

Ultyr turned away and she watched. Ears pressed as tears streamed and she watched him walk into the darkness. Was he abandoning them? Would he come back? Was it because they were weak? One fear easily shifting into another as her worries came forth.

Tremors came to her as she let the fear of abandonment by the master she had come to appreciate walked away. No real noise came from her but the whoosh of air from her nose as she followed through the motions of whines and whimpers might cause a small noise to come. Even if he was mad at her she preferred him over the unknown. She wouldn't move though. Ganymede needed the comfort. She turned her face away, her eye closing as the tears flowed more.

She wasn't allowed to make Ultyr stay, regardless of how much she loved him. They were in silence, aside from the sounds of breaths and hiccups. Both crying and just taking solace and comfort in each other's company. As uncomfortable as that should be, it was actually comfortable.

The sound of leaves crunching was their hint that Ultyr was returning. There was a relief in hearing his vocals announce himself. "It's Ultyr." A cant of her ears to his voice, and a deluge of new tears. These were relief. As much as her memories were bad and envoked nightmares, the fear of someone who finally cared leaving her was worse.

"Ganymede..." Her eye dropped to the faint pink dusting on the other's coat. "I will not harm you. I promised that you may walk away at any time. I am not my father. You may ask Lailah if I have ever hurt her." She would lie for him. She guessed he knew that already, or he wouldn't of lied. He'd hurt her once, for trying to encite a game. A sigh of breath. She didn't want to lie, but she would. A turn of her face to him, sad eye as he promised something to one and lied for the other. Disappointed, that's what that lie made her feel.

A god he claimed. She guessed gods could do as they pleased. "Ultyr….just come lay down, please. We need you, need to feel that you’re like us for a little bit. That you’re not an untouchable thing, just for a little while…" a small press of ears as glassy eyes looked up to the man who had her small and fragile heart and life in his paws. Another tremor as if to help emphasize Ganymede's next point. "If not for me then for Lailah, she feels scared." Fear, yeah she did feel fear. Though neither knew it wasn't just for memories.

A breath drew and released from her as another near whine sound of a breath came forth. Ganymede wasn't wrong, she needed Ultyr, but he needed them as well, even if he didn't love them, they were all each other had right now.

"Hear"

coded by NachoMumma

The words that reached him made Ultyr freeze in place. His breath caught in his throat like a frantic minnow in the hands of a child. Lay down with them? He had been certain his presence was making it all worse! The last thing either of them would have wanted was to feel and smell him so close to them, so much like his father... surely. He swallowed back a half-choked sound, then flinched as the sound escaped his throat. It was as if his father was still looming over all three of them.

He was a god... He slowly turned his watery gaze back to the puddle of little storm clouds. They needed him... To not be an untouchable thing... He blinked, similar words had fallen from another lips not so long ago.

He shifted his gaze to bright blue-eyed Lailah, noticing finally how beside herself she was. He brought his massive head to her cheek. He had forgotten to keep her in mind. She was different from the other mute slaves of his life. She was... clingy... Had his wandering off scared her? Like her game of hiding from him and scaring him? He was a--

He closed his eyes and slumped to the dark dirt, her nose still pressed gently to her cheek. "I hurt her once." He admitted softly, gods do not admit their mistakes, they make none... "I thought someone had taken her away from me without me noticing. I thought I was alone again. Turned out she was hiding but she wanted to be found. She had seemed happy when I had found her but I-" He swallowed and opened his eyes to peer into hers. He brought his paws up to her face to gently swipe her cheek and hold her chin. Her devotion was more than... worship... The least he could do was acknowledge her. He had never played children's games, or he didn't remember playing any. He didn't have any playmates before he was a year old.

Gods do not apologize...
"Lailah... I was scared when I couldn't find you. I shouldn't have gotten so angry with you. Do you forgive me?" He asked earnestly. He thought Gany would not want to be touched, so he didn't try.

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coded by NachoMumma

Ganymede was still, not moving his head from Lailah’s chest even when Ultyr grew closer, still seeking comfort for a while longer. Still seeking to give her some comfort as well though he knew it was barely a fraction of the comfort that Ultyr could give her. Relief came easily when he heard the heavy body slide to the ground near them, although closer to Lailah than himself, relief that maybe this would settle her heart at least a little. After all, she had already vaguely let slip her feelings for the other when they first met. ’ But I care for him in ways a slave shouldn't. He can be sweet and caring, he just has a temper sometimes.... he's kept me fed and ensured me pleasure when he needs someone to bed, unlike his father.’. Written by small hands in a gifted book, someone who sought solace from Ultyr.

"I hurt her once.” With the placement of his head, the words were clear and easy to hear past the thumping of Lailah’s heart—an admittance of a mistake, more than that too if he was honest. Admittance of a lie, having just implied not moments before that he had never hurt Lailah. So…the demon prince could be good, could have a heart, could crack through that god-like facade for a moment. Maybe there was hope for him after all. But that was something to work on when the three of them didn't carry the scent of fear on their coats. "I thought someone had taken her away from me without me noticing. I thought I was alone again. Turned out she was hiding but she wanted to be found. She had seemed happy when I had found her but I-" His mind is too focused now, catching the words of apology but not enough as he tumbled the previous admission around in his head. And he does give time for Lailah to accept or deny the apology, not wanting to rob her of this before he opens his mouth.

"You’re afraid of being alone." It isn't a question, not really, more like a statement of the things he’s noticed. Words roll in his mouth like marbles for a moment as he decides his next words to say, not lifting his head but moving his body so his legs are resting against Ultyr’s side while his head is still pillowed against Lailah’s stormy soft fur. A bridge almost with the way he was curved from one to the other. "I won't leave, I’ll stay, and not just for her. But, I want a promise from you," Words chosen carefully and gently, his voice never once holding malice or anger, just a heavy tiredness that wasnt just from waking in the middle of the night. "Don't lie to me again, or try and have her lie to me on your behalf. I deserve better than that after everything. You’re not your father, I believe you’re better than lying and dishonesty."

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coded by NachoMumma

Teary eyes watched Ultyr, connecting with his as he looked at her. Her good eye held him in a way that should of told him he was more than welcome. He was her everything right now. A moon revolving around a planet, that's how she felt usually. Ultyr was her planet and she was the moon, left in the dark and only able to shine when he allowed it. Ganymede was a good friend but not one she remembered, no matter how hard she tried.

As Ultyr moved closer she shifted to make room for him, where ever he decided to settle. His nose pressed to her cheek and she shifted her head to stay on Ganymedes but to nose Ultyr's to lay on her's. "I hurt her once." His words were a truth to amend the lie he had previous told. "I thought someone had taken her away from me without me noticing. I thought I was alone again. Turned out she was hiding but she wanted to be found. She had seemed happy when I had found her but I-" A shudder from her at the memory of teeth on her throat as he held her to the ground. The temper he had showed her in that moment, it had scared her. Had made her regret trying to get him to play. Made her no longer try to play games with him.

She let out a sigh as his paw touched her cheek and she leaned into his paw, easily letting him hold her face and do as he pleased. Her heart was already settling but still was a strong thud against Ganymede's ear. "Lailah... I was scared when I couldn't find you. I shouldn't have gotten so angry with you. Do you forgive me?" Her eye went to his, a gentleness there that had somehow miraculously lasted through her slavery. How should be one of the wonders of the world. A miracle that she hadn't wilted and become a hateful creature. She moved and pressed her forehead to his and closed her eyes letting her tears fall still. She had never needed the apology, had forgiven him well before now. But the apology, it felt like he might have some humanity in his heart at least, like she wasn't worthless.

"You’re afraid of being alone." Her ears pressed at the truth of the words. Though she hoped it wouldn't make the largest male upset with the pink dusted male. Her head moved back to it's place on top of Ganymede's but she more than invited Ultyr to lay his on hers. "I won't leave, I’ll stay, and not just for her. But, I want a promise from you," A sigh passed her lips as she tried to settle her own mind and slow her tears. Crying got slaves no where. Regardless of why they were shed. "Don't lie to me again, or try and have her lie to me on your behalf. I deserve better than that after everything. You’re not your father, I believe you’re better than lying and dishonesty." She gave a small shake of her body and quick bursts of breath as a noiseless laughter came from her. It's like they all forgot the most key detail about her. She couldn't talk. A lie could never pass her lips if she couldn't talk. She closed her eyes as she let herself calm down and just gently cry for the life she once had and couldn't remember but for the nightmare of that night. She felt exhausted still.

"Hear"

coded by NachoMumma

He felt her little body shudder at the memory as he spoke it. It had affected her perhaps more deeply than he had realized. He was no stranger to correcting a slave's mistake. He had easily taken the life of his own guard after they had dared touch his angel. This was a different world. A world where he was stripped of servants and guards and status. As her bright blue eye lifted to catch his while he sought her forgiveness the warmth there surprised him. He felt her head pressed into his, wetting his fur with her tears. Silent forgiveness was evident in every fiber of her fur.

His eyes darted to Ganymede's as he interjected. Ears pinned back in sudden shame and the burning gaze darted away. He didn't know someone could read him better than he knew himself. Yes, he needed to face that he was afraid of being alone. He was about to recoil when suddenly he felt the boy reach out and create a bridge with himself. Ultyr brought his eyes back to Ganymede's with a question as he placed his terms for an arrangement. His brows furrowed slightly at the promise he asked of Ultyr. He was silent for a moment as he mulled it over. He felt Lailah shaking between his paws as he rested them around her. As he turned his attention to her, the mirth on her face was clear with the way her silent body was shifting... she was laughing! His own smirk creased his maw until she closed her eyes and the exhaustion fell over her face again.

He brought his attention back to the promise Ganymede was hoping for from him. He brought one of his legs up to cover one of Gany's and looked into those tired pale lavender pools filled with hope and expectation. He wanted to get lost in them. Enchanting him to say whatever it took to bring Gany closer to him. He closed his eyes as the dilemma presented before him became tangled in the shadows of his soul.

"I see how important... not lying... is to you, but what you ask..." Each word felt like leeches pulled from the skin. Their figurative dagger teeth bit him as he spoke. "I don't know if I can make that promise... tonight." Warning him to say as much could distance Gany from him. How could he not lie when he was still trying to sort out what the difference was? Was he a God or not? He had begged his mind to let him be, to let him believe, it was too hard not to believe in his godhood. Perhaps his powers lie in Archnemes? Perhaps that was where his godhood stayed? Where was the lie?

"speech"

coded by NachoMumma